Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Al from Dadeville]

Are we going to see a resurgence of the grit wern?

For some reason I don’t remember the “cute older daddy” arc. Was that while he was in community college? I wonder if he watched “True Grit” and got fixated on the ~15 y/o female protagonist

Lucas also made a TERF post … I don’t think the zoomer baes are gonna be down for this

 

[WonderWino]

Being a total glutton i'm surprised lucas hasn't tried to stretch his meat budget by buying large slabs of pork belly and either trying to make some horrifying wernified version of chinese braised pork belly or adding an ungodly amount of spices, sauces and burning the absolute shit out of it until its a blackened, shriveled up mess of hard as a rock fat and pork. Either that or fuck it up and end up with it being half raw.

I can see it now - lucas would watch one of those videos with asians using coke to cook pork belly cubes, not realizing it was used in place of boiled brown sugar in water and start doing weird shit with sprite, milk or who knows what else, and then make a video of himself shirtless, biting into brick sized slabs of pork fat with the fat and sauce dripping all over himself

I suspect the reason he hasn't done this is because hes also a greedy twit and doesn't see pork belly as impressive or high end so he sticks to roasts and steaks. It feeds his self importance and he thinks he can impress a zoomer bae by showing off his steaks and roasts

and fuck now I have a horrifying mental image going on of lucas slathering a raw 10lb slab of pork belly with mayo, coke, several pounds of shredded cheese, ranch dressing, bbq sauce and 2 or 3 different salt spices and shoving it into the oven for 3+ hours, probably starting a fire in the process with all the fat that would be dripping onto the heating element, then acting like its a masterpiece of culinary art. Probably would shove chunks of garlic and corn nuts in there as well

 

[Al from Dadeville]

He made sweet and spicy pork tonight topped off with celery, corn, and green olives.

It reminded me of Alec Baldwin’s fake Spanish wife making paella with green olives - I know I’m getting off topic but she truly is a lolcow

 

[SpiceyHuman]

He made sweet and spicy pork tonight topped off with celery, corn, and green olives.
View attachment 3863169
It reminded me of Alec Baldwin’s fake Spanish wife making paella with green olives - I know I’m getting off topic but she truly is a lolcow
View attachment 3863172

Wait, whats wrong with green olive in paella? I've eaten at some spanish restaurants that served dishes like this and picadillo with green olives. Maybe its a regional thing?

 

[Al from Dadeville]

Wait, whats wrong with green olive in paella? I've eaten at some spanish restaurants that served dishes like this and picadillo with green olives. Maybe its a regional thing?

Apparently so. That’s hilarious too, the subreddit about her is pretty and they were all pissed off about the olives and peas on top.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

I was going to make a point about how comical it is that he thinks he could figure out how to become leader of the free world when he can't even figure out how to talk to a woman, but hell if John Fetterman can get elected into office dressed like a bum and unable to speak a single coherent sentence then Lucas might actually have a shot.

It's all performative fantasy copium, just like his PhD, successful boardgame designer career and inheritor of the Elk Kingdom with his haw Gen-Zee wife-slave.

It's never going to happen, there is no way he's going to improve his life and reach those goals, but if he posts about them on his social media accounts he can get dopamine hits from the people pretending to believe him; only to grow tired and bored of that idea and move onto the next phase of Future Wern fantasies.

 

[Twrx]

Even if he somehow got to become leader of the free world, he'd be like a dog that caught his own tail. Wouldn't know what the hell to do, but would also freak the hell out and run away screaming.

 

[WonderWino]

Even if he somehow got to become leader of the free world, he'd be like a dog that caught his own tail. Wouldn't know what the hell to do, but would also freak the hell out and run away screaming.

Either that or he'd go full power hungry psycho and try to nuke republican states and anyone who pisses him off or refuses to have any part of his direct internet democracy, yelling bernie sanders upon you! as the nukes launch

and if the journos were reeing about the stuff trump served at white house dinners when he was in office just wait until they see the toasterbortions that would be served to heads of state and official visitors with president wern in office. To say nothing of the fact he'd have white house cooks making food for him 24/7 until he resembled fat bastard and left the head chef weeping tears of blood from the horrifying things he had to create

Just imagine president wern - shirtless, laying sprawled out on the bed in the lincoln bedroom, with piles of food stacked on the bed around him as he screams nonsensically to world leaders about socialism and underage girls and how they're all greedy. Truly an image worthy of the cover of time magazine

 

[HaloHero65]

Would someone please be able to catch me up on the current events in the Lucas saga? Anything interesting happen since the farm was down or just general Lucas stuff ?
Honestly don't feel like searching 200 pages to see if his fat ass got kicked out of the mental housing.

 

[Cnaiur urs Skiotha]

Would someone please be able to catch me up on the current events in the Lucas saga? Anything interesting happen since the farm was down or just general Lucas stuff ?
Honestly don't feel like searching 200 pages to see if his fat ass got kicked out of the mental housing.

“Current events”, “anything interesting”: lol no. Lucas has been boring as fuck since he got housing and was forced to take his meds. The only semi-interesting happening was going to the hospital for something kidney-related that he was vague about and tried to pass off as dehydration, but is probably the Beetus trying to shut down his organs. But that’s it, and he didn’t even moo and reee about it really, just tried to ignore it.

In my opinion the milk is almost completely dry from Lucas rn. That will only change if he does something to get himself kicked out of his housing, or if his health gets so bad he’s forced to confront his mortality and has a breakdown over it. I don’t have much hope for the former, apparently the meds keep Lucas sedate and tolerable by the low standards of tard housing. But if he loses his feet or has to go to dialysis every week it might actually force him to confront reality in a way that makes him freak out again.

 

[Plague Flea]

Would someone please be able to catch me up on the current events in the Lucas saga? Anything interesting happen since the farm was down or just general Lucas stuff ?
Honestly don't feel like searching 200 pages to see if his fat ass got kicked out of the mental housing.

His Redbubble Wern merch store is mildly amusing. The original post mentioning it is here.

 

[BowlOfDick]

I stand by what I said in that, while Lucas has a degree of stability in terms of housing, we shouldn’t give up hope. We know know from many, many examples that Luke sits on a razor’s edge when it comes to his mental health and behaviour. He can experience sharp declines in his mental state on very short notice.

Keep the faith! The milk will flow once more, and sooner than you think..

“Current events”, “anything interesting”: lol no. Lucas has been boring as fuck since he got housing and was forced to take his meds. The only semi-interesting happening was going to the hospital for something kidney-related that he was vague about and tried to pass off as dehydration, but is probably the Beetus trying to shut down his organs. But that’s it, and he didn’t even moo and reee about it really, just tried to ignore it.

In my opinion the milk is almost completely dry from Lucas rn. That will only change if he does something to get himself kicked out of his housing, or if his health gets so bad he’s forced to confront his mortality and has a breakdown over it. I don’t have much hope for the former, apparently the meds keep Lucas sedate and tolerable by the low standards of tard housing. But if he loses his feet or has to go to dialysis every week it might actually force him to confront reality in a way that makes him freak out again.

 

[WonderWino]

I stand by what I said in that, while Lucas has a degree of stability in terms of housing, we shouldn’t give up hope. We know know from many, many examples that Luke sits on a razor’s edge when it comes to his mental health and behaviour. He can experience sharp declines in his mental state on very short notice.

Keep the faith! The milk will flow once more, and sooner than you think..

Exactly. He always chimps out sooner or later. With his crazy shakes he's not going to want to be taking his meds for much longer if that keeps getting worse. Plus its less than 2 weeks until his birthday, we're bound to see some entitled ranting around that time. Especially when dementia mom doesn't send him anything this year

EDIT:

Barney may be current lucas but ralph is definitely kid lucas:

....Though his IQ and behavior seem about the same as they are now. Right down to scaring off little girls, not knowing why and pissing himself

 

[FadeIntoBolivian]

Catching up on the Wern after a long time, is there a post/link to somewhere that summarizes his mental health history/meds/etc situation? I'm kinda morbidly curious.

If him gaining weight and being forced to take his meds are things that started to take place around the same time, there's a pretty good chance he's being forced to take some kind of antipsychotic. Nearly all of them can cause people to balloon even with reasonable diets, so combine one of those with his extremely shitty diet, sky's the limit.

I also see people mentioning his kidneys a lot, Lithium can be damaging to those under certain circumstances, and could easily be what's causing his hands to shake so much. I wonder if there's really any kind of sane/self aware person lurking under all that mental illness. Perhaps if there was any combination of pills you could give him that could make him "snap out of it", any amount of lucidity or insight would just be too much to handle. Imagine having a whole crappy childhood with asperger's or w/e he's diagnosed with, and then going on to lead your entire adult life in a psychotic haze, living on the streets, embarrassing yourself online and in public, etc. It'd probably be way easier to just keep things the way they are than have any realization of how wasted your life has been.

 

[Twrx]

Catching up on the Wern after a long time, is there a post/link to somewhere that summarizes his mental health history/meds/etc situation? I'm kinda morbidly curious.

If him gaining weight and being forced to take his meds are things that started to take place around the same time, there's a pretty good chance he's being forced to take some kind of antipsychotic. Nearly all of them can cause people to balloon even with reasonable diets, so combine one of those with his extremely shitty diet, sky's the limit.

I also see people mentioning his kidneys a lot, Lithium can be damaging to those under certain circumstances, and could easily be what's causing his hands to shake so much. I wonder if there's really any kind of sane/self aware person lurking under all that mental illness. Perhaps if there was any combination of pills you could give him that could make him "snap out of it", any amount of lucidity or insight would just be too much to handle. Imagine having a whole crappy childhood with asperger's or w/e he's diagnosed with, and then going on to lead your entire adult life in a psychotic haze, living on the streets, embarrassing yourself online and in public, etc. It'd probably be way easier to just keep things the way they are than have any realization of how wasted your life has been.

Pl, but when I finally got help for PTSD and got on meds, the relaziaton of how I had been acting in the haze of PTSD really fucked me up. That was only a few years, can't imagine even a second of lucidity would be manageable for him.

 

[WonderWino]

Paedophile who judge allowed to go on holiday is jailed for 15 years

Matthew Thompson, 48, was given permission to go on a two-week holiday to Greece.

ca.news.yahoo.com

Tell me this pedo doesn't look disturbingly like lucas


Same expression, same pube beard, same weird thing going on with his eyes. He seriously looks like he's making the same expression lucas does when he's trying to go into full rhetorical questioning mode. Only thing missing is holding a finger at his mouth

Also who the fuck lets a guy accused of being a pedo go on an out of country vacation while on bail

 

[Twrx]

Paedophile who judge allowed to go on holiday is jailed for 15 years

Matthew Thompson, 48, was given permission to go on a two-week holiday to Greece.

ca.news.yahoo.com

Tell me this pedo doesn't look disturbingly like lucas
View attachment 3894639

Same expression, same pube beard, same weird thing going on with his eyes. He seriously looks like he's making the same expression lucas does when he's trying to go into full rhetorical questioning mode. Only thing missing is holding a finger at his mouth

Also who the fuck lets a guy accused of being a pedo go on an out of country vacation while on bail

I know he's a British pedo, and it all takes place in the UK, but I can easily see it happening in Canada. Look at Yaniv. Intially my thought was it was in Canada due to it coming from . Ca

 

[Da Dude123]

Does anyone know, has Lucas not been mooing lately? He privatized his FB posts to friends only. He hasn't posted in IG in like a week. Also, the troll pages on FB haven't posted any new content from him. Has anyone heard from the lolcow, Lucas Werner? He is probably due for another stint in the hospital since he immediately returned to his horrible diet after he got out with his earlier bout of renal failure? Anyone know anything?

 

[Dread First]

Does anyone know, has Lucas not been mooing lately? He privatized his FB posts to friends only. He hasn't posted in IG in like a week. Also, the troll pages on FB haven't posted any new content from him. Has anyone heard from the lolcow, Lucas Werner? He is probably due for another stint in the hospital since he immediately returned to his horrible diet after he got out with his earlier bout of renal failure? Anyone know anything?

I can only really speculate, but if the Jonathan Ross thread is anything to go off of, it could be that Lucas finally got his internet privileges revoked to a certain degree. Of course, I would like to point out that this is merely speculation on my part. Lucas has been an unmitigated vagrant terror to the people of Spokane for 6 going on 7 years now; why only now reel him in?

 

[Twrx]

I can only really speculate, but if the Jonathan Ross thread is anything to go off of, it could be that Lucas finally got his internet privileges revoked to a certain degree. Of course, I would like to point out that this is merely speculation on my part. Lucas has been an unmitigated vagrant terror to the people of Spokane for 6 going on 7 years now; why only now reel him in?

Someone stopped being lazy. Stopped trying to shift him onto the next person.