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What are your expectations for the EU5 release?

  • Total voters
    83
  • Poll closed .
Cautiously optimistic about EU 5. I think Paradox is rattled with how bad V3 and Cities 2 have been recieved, not to mention the growing discontent with CK3 and the Graveyard of Empires debacle, and they realize they need a banger with EU5 to regain goodwill. I think (hope) this will be their most polished full release since CK3, and it looks like it will actaully have some fucking content to go with it. Could be wrong, but I hope.
 
Is Ifat in Somalia a new apple product?
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I haven't followed any of the EUV stuff, have they announced if the game will have customizable start dates? Removing them in CK3 was gay, I don't care about their excuse that most people started in 1066, it was fun to start in different years.
 
HeyYou said:
I haven't followed any of the EUV stuff, have they announced if the game will have customizable start dates? Removing them in CK3 was gay, I don't care about their excuse that most people started in 1066, it was fun to start in different years.
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As someone who has done history modding for pdx games, it's such a pain in the ass to do it year by year, that I don't blame them at all for removing it. Not worth at all.
 
LovisXVI said:
As someone who has done history modding for pdx games, it's such a pain in the ass to do it year by year, that I don't blame them at all for removing it. Not worth at all.
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I do blame them because it's fun and simulating different cool historical wars is only possible if you can set the date. They have the history files from EUIV and nobody particularly cares about 100% accuracy. They don't have the CK3 problem of character appearances being infinitely more complicated in the history files either.
 
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Mark my words, the release will be a cock-up, maybe not a complete disaster but they will bungle it, badly.
CK2 was a miracle; every release prior was an unmitigated fuck-up I don't need to tell you about the good old release version boot up CTDs.
Other than that one time in 2012 when they actually did QA, every single release since (including DLCs) has had the same parajew lifecycle; botched launches every single time and EU5 will be no different.
There will be something catastrophic for 1.0 and I can't wait to see the cope/seethe.
 
Snekposter said:
We just got another one today, too. To say they didn't test this release at all would be an understatement.
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It did have multiple open beta builds, so without that it would've been an even bigger mess.
 
Mound Dweller said:
Mark my words, the release will be a cock-up, maybe not a complete disaster but they will bungle it, badly.
CK2 was a miracle; every release prior was an unmitigated fuck-up I don't need to tell you about the good old release version boot up CTDs.
Other than that one time in 2012 when they actually did QA, every single release since (including DLCs) has had the same parajew lifecycle; botched launches every single time and EU5 will be no different.
There will be something catastrophic for 1.0 and I can't wait to see the cope/seethe.
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There needs to be an opposite of the Optimistic sticker, Pessimistic, because some of you motherfuckers are just too damn quick to jump to the most negative possible conclusions. It's like you want things to be bad.
 
LovisXVI said:
There needs to be an opposite of the Optimistic sticker, Pessimistic, because some of you motherfuckers are just too damn quick to jump to the most negative possible conclusions. It's like you want things to be bad.
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It is called pattern recognition.
Lets ignore the published slop ala Clitty Skylines 2 and focus on the inhouse stuff since the 2012 salvation; EU4, HOI4, Stellaris, Imperator, CK3.
They have all had the exact same issues;
1. Too many cooks; look in the game files they are utter messes of reused code from EU3/new localisation files from last week, Frankensteins that would make Bethesda blush, the myriad of bugs may sometimes result in kino (10,000 dev Beijing thanks to scuffed tributarys lol) but represent a core lack of skill.
2. Disparate and questionable focus; EU4 is historical simulation no it's a wargame no it's a map painter no it's an authentic history simulator, how many times has Stellaris had a complete pop rework? How many years was Estonia the only way to unite Scandinavia? Wait, le poopen farten jokes! They do not even know/care what they are making.
3. DLCitis: I don't even need to sperg about this one
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EU5 will be more of the same, it will be a shitshow because it always is, expecting bleach and ammonia to create some new element just because you're mixing in a bathtub in Barcelona is pure :lunacy: The only thing to be 🌈 about are the (not so inevitable; the CK3 scene was almost killed completely by the TWO FUCKING YEARS it took for Royal Court to be done) fan overhauls, even then the base game will a living abortion of skub because of course it will be.
When it releases and I am proved right I expect you to pay the proper homage.
 
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Mound Dweller said:
Mark my words, the release will be a cock-up, maybe not a complete disaster but they will bungle it, badly.
CK2 was a miracle; every release prior was an unmitigated fuck-up I don't need to tell you about the good old release version boot up CTDs.
Other than that one time in 2012 when they actually did QA, every single release since (including DLCs) has had the same parajew lifecycle; botched launches every single time and EU5 will be no different.
There will be something catastrophic for 1.0 and I can't wait to see the cope/seethe.
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Eu4 was good on release and subsequent DLC has made it worse.
CK2 was also better before later DLC added retainers completely undermining the feudalism mechanics.
 
Mound Dweller said:
expecting bleach and ammonia to create some new element just because you're mixing in a bathtub in Barcelona is pure :lunacy:
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Look man, when Tinto whipped up Leviathan it somehow managed to be pure weapons-grade mustard gas instead of that ghetto bullshit everyone else at PDX makes. So give the Spaniards some credit, will you? As bad as BioGenesis and Graveyard of Empires have been at least they didn't have missing and placeholder art assets all over the place.
 
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