Peace Please?

[BT 075]

Even if I have improved or I were to, how can I prove it?

Send Heather a long letter apologizing for having been such a dickhead to her for so long.

Then, you invest some time in your artistic skill and make them less this:

And more this:

 

[The Golden Knight]

Show by your actions, not your words

But, on the web, all we have are words.

Plus, I can not believe Mandy is actually 110% legit, from everything said over Skype to the fact she has (as of this writing) truly fallen for me. It's too good to be true, and after all I feel like I've been through (truth or not), it's hard to believe.

 

[The Yawning Squirtle]

I have read a LOT of awesome stuff here (and maybe some not-so-awesome stuff as well), but I have a question. Even if I have improved or I were to, how can I prove it?

I've said it in my pretty long winded post. Ignore people you feel are harassing. Don't seek validation in them. Don't give them the satisfaction of a dramatic reaction to their bullying.

Let your actions and ways of changing speak for themselves by actively doing them. The best thing for you right now would probably be to go to counseling every week and remove your presence from the web for awhile.

But, on the web, all we have are words.

Plus, I can not believe Mandy is actually 110% legit, from everything said over Skype to the fact she has (as of this writing) truly fallen for me. It's too good to be true, and after all I feel like I've been through (truth or not), it's hard to believe.

Maybe she is, maybe she isn't, but unless you're willing to dump buckets of money and effort into a girl a thousand or so miles away, then you have every right to not pursue this anymore.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

I have read a LOT of awesome stuff here (and maybe some not-so-awesome stuff as well), but I have a question. Even if I have improved or I were to, how can I prove it?

Seek mental health counseling, I'm sure your parents are willing to pay for the best therapists in the DMV

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

No, I have not given it any thought. My only answer is, "Because it's fun, and it makes me feel good when appropriate."

I have a lot to read, so give me a few minutes to digest. Speaking of digest, I must also eat!

What is your daily quota at Geek Squad?

 

[Saney]

No, I have not given it any thought. My only answer is, "Because it's fun, and it makes me feel good when appropriate."

Some of the stuff you're into definitely would not feel good to the person you're subjecting it to. Like stinging them with jellyfish or pistol whipping them. That would seriously injure or even disfigure them, Jay.

 

[The Golden Knight]

I think this is counseling enough. I do not feel someone like myself, who should be merely quirky, does not deserve institutionalization.

What is your daily quota at Geek Squad?

We don't have a quota, per se. But we do want to get our turnaround time as small as possible (turnaround being how many days from computer-in to computer-out). Right now, we are grotesquely understaffed at the store I work at (usually with no more than 3 Geeks on duty at any given time, new Geeks included), so that turnaround is currently at around 5 days.

Some of the stuff you're into definitely would not feel good to the person you're subjecting it to. Like stinging them with jellyfish or pistol whipping them. That would seriously injure or even disfigure them, Jay.

I passionately abide by my one and only hard rule: No serious or permanent damage, up to and including death. If I had the chance, I would be extremely gentle and slow about it.

 

[Coster]

I think this is counseling enough. I do not feel someone like myself, who should be merely quirky, does not deserve institutionalization.

Institutionalization and counselling are very different. You can get counselling for anything, institutionalization is for absolutely extreme cases.

 

[Bork Laser]

But, on the web, all we have are words.

Plus, I can not believe Mandy is actually 110% legit, from everything said over Skype to the fact she has (as of this writing) truly fallen for me. It's too good to be true, and after all I feel like I've been through (truth or not), it's hard to believe.

The fact your becoming more self aware that the problem lies in YOU and not some invisible enemy on the internet is a decent step. I personally dont care about your art. If people like it, then they will like it. If they dont, they dont. But like I said before, getting professional help with your problems can go a long way into helping fix your "reputation" but most important help you from doing something in the future that you will regret forever.

 

[Saney]

I think this is counseling enough. I do not feel someone like myself, who should be merely quirky, does not deserve institutionalization.

We're not professionals Jay, we can't help you like a real psychologist could. It's pretty doubtful that you'd be institutionalised.

 

[Whatisgoingon]

I think this is counseling enough. I do not feel someone like myself, who should be merely quirky, does not deserve institutionalization.

While we are trying to help you, we aren't professionals. They don't institutionalize people anymore unless they are incredibly dangerous, which you are not. I think you should go to a counselor.

 

[The Golden Knight]

We're not professionals Jay, we can't help you like a real psychologist could. It's pretty doubtful that you'd be institutionalised.

To me, I don't need "professional help." I simply need a place to air myself so I can remove my inner taint; like a confessional. Then again, I think that would be best with Mom, as busy as she is (bless her heart).

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Guys, I'm going to point out the elephant in the room. Jay, the reason you have difficulties understanding all this social stuff is because you have autism. Get yourself checked out. Many people have it but they were lucky enough to get diagnosed early and learn coping skills and how to better socialize. And no, your mom is not qualified to handle it.

 

[Coster]

To me, I don't need "professional help." I simply need a place to air myself so I can remove my inner taint; like a confessional. Then again, I think that would be best with Mom, as busy as she is (bless her heart).

Trust me, trust me, fucking trust me. Counselors can be a godsend. Junior year of high school I completely fell apart, and my counselors were able to help me pick up the pieces. Even if you don't think you need professional help, it doesn't hurt to try.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

I have a BA in History and direct an educational program in a developing country where we teach spoiled rich kids how to argue and speak English pretty. If you want advice on how to tear apart trolls on the internet by deconstructing their logic, I'm your man (for a price). I'm not capable of offering you the help you need in becoming better socially adjusted and make friends who do more than just barely tolerate you at work. You need to see a professional. Not institutionalization, but meeting with someone or in a group of people once or twice a week to talk about your problems and come up solutions in order to cope with it. If you go to group thereapy, you might even make some friends and meet some other people who need more social interaction. You also need to be honest wtih these people. The biggest lolcows on the ones on this site are that way because they're unwilling to listen to help.

 

[Saney]

I passionately abide by my one and only hard rule: No serious or permanent damage, up to and including death. If I had the chance, I would be extremely gentle and slow about it.

Gentle and slow pistol whipping is an oxymoron. And it's definitely impossible to be gentle or slow when you're stinging a person with jellyfish tentacles.

 

[UnwiseKhan]

To me, I don't need "professional help." I simply need a place to air myself so I can remove my inner taint; like a confessional. Then again, I think that would be best with Mom, as busy as she is (bless her heart).

From experience, it really does help to talk to a therapist/counselor/whatever sometimes. Having someone where you don't have to worry about judgement and that has dealt with the kind of issues you have can really help, and it usually doesn't involve any kind of institutionalization. The kind of things people have been talking about here aren't things you just wish away, it takes effort over a long period of time, and seeing someone might help you with that. It also helps to have an outside perspective on it, from someone that isn't actually involved in the problems.

Remember, we're about as far from non-judgemental or confession as you can get.

 

[The Yawning Squirtle]

Some of the stuff you're into definitely would not feel good to the person you're subjecting it to. Like stinging them with jellyfish or pistol whipping them. That would seriously injure or even disfigure them, Jay.

This.

It's not wrong to be a sadist, it's not heinous to be into kink.

But as someone in the kink community, I have some valid advice for you on this as well.

Kink shouldn't seriously injure or disfigure. I honestly think a lot of your fantasies are just that, fantasies. The reality of a girl screaming from legitimate hurt during a cattle prod session would probably not be all that hot outside of fantasy, or at least I would hope.

As a sadist, you should be in touch with your empathy, you should not want to seriously harm your partner. You should want it to give them some satisfaction too.

Without getting too TMI, I am quite familiar with this type of play. But spankings, light hiting, and electrical play with the proper toys are quite a far cry from things that could seriously disfigure, and even so, I am very careful. I am constantly checking to make sure my partner is not saying the safe word or visibly distressed.

Please try and take the time to separate your fantasy from reality. In fact, anything you want to do to a partner, it is quite possibly a good idea to find a way to try on yourself first, to make sure it won't really harm anyone in consensual play.

 

[Bork Laser]

To me, I don't need "professional help." I simply need a place to air myself so I can remove my inner taint; like a confessional. Then again, I think that would be best with Mom, as busy as she is (bless her heart).

Jay, does most your experience with professional help come from movies? If so don't base it off that. No one is gonna put you in a half way house, in jail, or anything. You'll get someone to talk to, make recommendations on what to do and MAYBE give you medication. That person will be there to help, in ways we cant I might add, not be against you.

 

[SparksterSanjulo]

To me, I don't need "professional help." I simply need a place to air myself so I can remove my inner taint; like a confessional. Then again, I think that would be best with Mom, as busy as she is (bless her heart).

A therapist can help with that though, Jay. Your mom has a very biased view towards you because you're her son. A therapist gives you unbiased and great feedback. The trick is just finding a therapist that works for you. Once you find one though, it's a very rewarding experience.