Containment Random Chris Updates

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
RebelRein1488x said:
Chris snapped and had enough with Jacob’s shit again.
View attachment 1445248
Ironic how he’s calling him egotistical.
Click to expand...

"Also, Dude, you frustrate me, Sonichu, a lot."
It's starting to seem that Chris has to remind himself that he's supposed to be Sonichu.
But then again Chris doesn't know how normal people talk.
 
  • Agree
  • Like
  • Winner
Reactions: s0mbra, navydeckink, Tallarn Desert Raider and 11 others
Snuckening said:
Not content with just stealing away Chris's galpals, a certain villainous orange Hedgehog turned up on tv, to mock Chris's magical goddess-powers, too.

Click to expand...
Duncan Hills Coffee said:
Talk about moving up in the world. It's surreal to see someone tangentially related to Chris show up on mainstream media. Plus Wes actually did a good job on the show and appears to be a legitimately talented magician.
Click to expand...
Alex Krycek said:
Real talk. He and I have a mutual friend on Facebook and the friend I’m speaking of is a very talented magician and once named Wes as one of the most underrated he had ever known. I had to do a double take because of course I knew who that was. I didn’t mention Chris because the guy is in his 60s and trying to explain why a random autistic guy drew his friend as a Sonic Recolor was going to be impossible. Still it was cool to know he would be better known in the world than just an evil orange monster.
Click to expand...
Thanks for sharing, @Snuckening. I'm so unbelievably happy for Wes. I almost wish Chris could see this.
TheOnlyYamchaFan said:
Man, if chris is goddess level by being able to make rocks fall out of his hand, then wes is the one supreme being of all reality.
Click to expand...
Man, now I really want Chris to see this.
Tikbalang said:
Unlike what he gave to sock
View attachment 1442869
Not mentioning to seek a doctor
Click to expand...
Chris should remember this the next time he gets a UTI from shoving his dick up his ass.
 
  • Like
  • Optimistic
  • Agree
Reactions: s0mbra, navydeckink, Grumpy Pickle Rick and 1 other person
I feel like Chris is now in the dying embers phase... his life is just fading away, he's at a dead-end, Barb on her last legs. Chris will never get a job.... one quick Google and his lolcow life will be revealed to a potential employer.... No woman will ever date him either.

It's a slow and sad ending but maybe the old Horse' can conjure up some magic and somehow have a comeback.
 
  • Feels
  • Late
  • Like
Reactions: s0mbra, navydeckink, Jaspergers Cat and 10 others
Sonicpoo said:
I feel like Chris is now in the dying embers phase... his life is just fading away, he's at a dead-end, Barb on her last legs. Chris will never get a job.... one quick Google and his lolcow life will be revealed to a potential employer.... No woman will ever date him either.

It's a slow and sad ending but maybe the old Horse' can conjure up some magic and somehow have a comeback.
Click to expand...
I bet eventually they'll be a 'mid life crisis saga' when Chris eventually realises things aren't turning out how he expected, probally around the time Barb finally croaks.

I don't think getting a job has really been an issue for a long time, it's just so unlikely to happen at this point but Chris does have the potential to make a living from his internet infamy if he decided to return to making regular vlogs or whatever.
 
  • Disagree
  • Like
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Jaspergers Cat, discombobulate, Timmy Testicles and 7 others
Pickle Inspector said:
I bet eventually they'll be a 'mid life crisis saga' when Chris eventually realises things aren't turning out how he expected, probally around the time Barb finally croaks.
Click to expand...
I dunno, I think it’ll be just a repeat of the post-Bob dry spell. Chris will be too depressed to really interact much and just play more vidya, or escape more deeply in his merge fantasy. He’ll scramble to get his ass into a subsidized living arrangement, probably get backpay, will move into an apartment not too dissimilar from Jake’s, and eventually will bounce back to his usual ignorant, jovial self. Actually, without Barb around to nag on him, he’ll probably feel way better than before since he won’t need to worry about her randomly barging in and wrecking his shit because he ignored her demands.

Only thing left to worry about would be the dogs but I’m pretty sure Chris would put them up for adoption or something. Then again they’re so poorly trained and hostile to people that I’m unsure that a kennel would be able to rehome them without special training.

Bottom line: Chris will be forced to jump through hoops, which he’s had to do before with the house fire/hit and run/pepper spray incidents and he’ll somehow end up unscathed like a drunk hobo wandering through a minefield uninjured.
 
  • Agree
  • Like
  • Optimistic
Reactions: thermocline, Stupidty_doop_DOOP, Army Burger and 16 others
Pickle Inspector said:
I bet eventually they'll be a 'mid life crisis saga' when Chris eventually realises things aren't turning out how he expected, probally around the time Barb finally croaks.

I don't think getting a job has really been an issue for a long time, it's just so unlikely to happen at this point but Chris does have the potential to make a living from his internet infamy if he decided to return to making regular vlogs or whatever.
Click to expand...
Chris has been making an ass of himself on the Internet for 20 years and trolled for 13 of those years and in all those years the only thing he's changed about himself has been identifying as a woman and a CPU Goddess. The man is incapable of looking at himself critically and making any effort to really change his life. If anything he will regress further into childhood and merge fantasies unless its absolutely necessary like dealing with court hearings or finding a place to stay when he gets evicted from his house.

I personally think the window for Chris to capitalize off his Internet fame has long passed but even if there was an opportunity to make money he wouldn't take it. Drawing comics for Patreon supporters, making Medallions, doing commissions, making videos, all of that becomes work in the end and the one thing Chris hates more than anything else is work.
 
  • Agree
  • Feels
  • Like
Reactions: thermocline, Stupidty_doop_DOOP, Army Burger and 10 others
Strange Wilderness said:
Chris has been making an ass of himself on the Internet for 20 years and trolled for 13 of those years and in all those years the only thing he's changed about himself has been identifying as a woman and a CPU Goddess. The man is incapable of looking at himself critically and making any effort to really change his life. If anything he will regress further into childhood and merge fantasies unless its absolutely necessary like dealing with court hearings or finding a place to stay when he gets evicted from his house.
Click to expand...
The main factor I think which might spur on a change is loneliness, he’d suddenly be living in an empty house after 40 years of living with his parents, maybe Chris will decide the time is right for a replacement mom wife and we’ll get another love quest. Or maybe he’ll just regress further like you say.
 
  • Optimistic
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: s0mbra and crap
You guys are starting to sway off topic and into what will happen when barb dies territory. But it is still a depressing thought. Chris situation went from being a hilarious fanboy who really was no different than the other dime a dozen sonic fanboys who took to the internet to rant about how they still loved him even though the 90s were over and the games were getting worse and worse.

To a laughingstock who constantly disclosed embarrassing info about himself, went out in public with a sign trying to pick up women like he was a toddler running a lemonade stand and showed of his crappy comic.

And finally whatever this is... At least in the past we had the impression Chris Chan the internet persona was just an act for attention kinda like those brony analysists he worships now, but no he's the same buffoon online as he is off
 
  • Agree
  • Like
Reactions: Stupidty_doop_DOOP, Army Burger, Don Homer and 3 others
FAT Jacob Sockness is being strung along by Chris to make more of a lulcow of himself.
#4dChess

fatcob.JPG
archive.li

Chris Chan Sonichu/CPU Blue Heart⚡️💙⚡️ on Twitter: "@JacobSockness I…

archived 14 Jul 2020 10:37:25 UTC
archive.li archive.li
 
  • Informative
  • Like
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: thermocline, Crinoids, Picklechu and 8 others
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back