random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Thé au lait]

can you really blame niggers for liking chicken and watermelons? They're delicious
If liking a good watermelon makes a nigger, then I'm the biggest nigger on the planet
You can quote me on that

 

[World Famous Quasi Payer]

Well, ol' Herschel bowed his head because he knew that he'd been beat
And he laid that shower-door fiddle down on the ground at Hans's feet

 

[Dead Lion]

I like that even in a nuclear apocalypse, Ralph survives

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I can't wait to hear him read this thread for 5 hours

Doing this shit while he is at rehab and can't defend himself of explain, bitch-made. Turkey Tom is a PUSSY. Boss is going to fuck his mother so hard once he's out his grandmother will feel it.

tom you're a faggot and destiny still won't fuck you

BossmanJack might be a crackhead with a gambling addiction, but he's never misdirected his audience away from a child predator before!

the only 5 hour turkey Tom video worth watching would be an ISIS beheading style video

let this be a message to all you feature creeps posting in THE Bossman thread
NO. RATS.
THINK BEFORE YOU SQUEAK

Go fucking meditate on if a dog has Buddha nature if this shit's too fucking hard for you faggot

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

The world has been ran and operated by lolcows longer than Rome's existence.

I still wouldn't want a bi polar furry for my attorney.

Even ancient peoples were wary of the Troon before this.

Its dumb, but also bold.

It's actually creepy listening to a Turkey Tom video to realize he's poorly paraphrasing your own posts and somehow still getting details wrong.

Gay retards ruin enough things already, let's stop arguing for their benefit.

 

[JustSomeDong]

’Hello chyat, sorry for the technical difficulties i had to switch to shortwave radio because the internet is down. Anyway, the forum is down until further notice as LFJ has mutated into a weird monster and is now nibbling on the server for minerals. Let’s get into the news *forgets hamster*. ’conflict between India and Palestine has gone hot, causes end of the world’ so yeah, the world ended because of a inter-pajeet which isn’t as much of a problem as FUCKING STRIPE NOT GIVING ME ACCESS TO FINANCIAL SERVICES, and of course, their headquarters survived unscathed. Okay, that wraps up the news segment, now off to Ethan Ralph who has become a warlord and his army is vying for control of Baja California…’

 

[Thé au lait]

if i see an interracial or gay couple i scream until i fall to the ground and then keep hitting the ground until mom gives me some chicken tendies and mountain dew

i see a brown person and i must ree

Every time I see a mixed race child I thank Jim Crow for the impending Happy Meals my mom is about to buy me.

 

[Pedophobe]

Me being a judgemental prick is completely different from you being a self inserting retard.

 

[Harm]

Piss is wet, dogs bark, and brother, these retards will slup that piss instead of doing something productive

 

[Adash]

I used to goon to Ellen Page and told everyone about it, and then a few years later she went full troon mode. She made a fool of me.

 

[RollingRock2]

The Tommie Tooter Hate Hotel Program still has some refinements needed in the evidence, but it's coming down to the fermished faygela zionazi's answer following on shortly after i get my foot in the door with the eminent domain complaint getting filed tomorrow afternoon after i pick up a letter from my PCP.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/tommy-tooter-thomas-wasserberg.18925/post-21280294

ZIONAZI

 

[Guns of the Gaytriots]

@Null Nice try on getting your jannies to do something funny on my profile.

 

[Garlic Salt]

i have also been preparing to fight a chimp for 7 years, 6 months and 23 days by now, even tho that day will never happen

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

It's the closest thing to therapy he's any chance of getting, we're the safe injection room for his psyche, every autisticker is a shot of mental methadone, it fixes nothing but it keeps him going, we're the real angels.

BossmanJack might be a crackhead with a gambling addiction, but he's never misdirected his audience away from a child predator before!

Boss is king, some peasant called Tom can’t touch him.
Only the Bossman can fuck with Bossmans life.

Do you think I make autistic "lol cow" triangles of all the lol cows i follow in virginia and figure out theres a fucking nuclear power plant...just for this faggot to steal it and profit? No. Fuck him, juice me.

Ever heard of Beyond good and evil? Well this transcript is beyond gay and retarded.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

The mountain calls for him, let him be consumed by it.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I don’t know if I’ve ever seen any other lolcow have as much violent ideations against their perceived enemies

I've really only seen one. But writing her name will summon her and it's too nice a day for that.

I don't have a grandad to ask because he's fucking dead but if I swirled his ashes around in the bottom of a cup of tea it'd give better advice.

"Maybe one of my favorite things to revisit as I'm finishing editing is Brianna talking about how she experienced ego death in a medical Ketamine hole, and in her spirit journey her inner self apparently said she'd never be a woman."

Does this nigger think breaking the terms of service is a crime?

Currently, they're pretending to be retarded

They're not pretending

Oh, my tattoo that says "KILL ALL COMMUNISTS"? That means kill all communists. I hate communists.

Imagine being so fucking fat even a Tommy Bahama fat guy shirt can't hide how fat you are.

 

[Magicat]

>sees the little mermaid
>troons out

lmao

Click for context

 

[Haloperidol]

It's true I just walked out of a gas station and a 7'5" Barron Trump walked up to me in gold trimmed Hugo Boss and slapped my freshly bought fried catfish out of my hand before swallowing a 4'8" latino man whole in front of me. Then he injected boiling milk into my eyes.

he was a Body Type 1
she was a Body Type 2
can i make it any more obvious?

 

[Law]

Found the sequel to "eat hot chip and lie"

There are women out there who want to be single, on drugs, don't need a religion, and who have never felt a maternal instinct in their life. They like to take acid and shoot guns with those guys who can't stop telling disgusting stories from the time they got car-kidnpped in Afghanistan. They are always single because other lesbians want to settle down and/or have a savings account. They are the ones still living as hipsters in their 40s in the year 2025 in some kind of drill-music illegal boarding house owned by a Cambodian drug runner.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

She was aptly named the Vroom-Vroom lady and I still have no idea what the hell she did at the school

. So, blocking access to about 6 kinds of vegetables was a huge lard ass on a store scooter

I've also delivered pizza to a skeletor which was also shocking, but irrelevant

people look at me like I'm wearing rat shit as a wig when I try to explain why giant steel toe boots are more comfy than than sneakers because this is such a counter-intuitive thing

If a chick muff dives once it doesn't matter if she goes on to marry the straightest man in the world and loses her gold star. She can pick the pubes out of her teeth but she can never pick the pubes out of her heart

Yes, the IDF are killing Gazans with forced Windows 11 upgrades.

I'd rather deal with our own home-grown retards than deal with both our home-grown retards and their home-grown retards and their second-hand retards

Ethan Ralph is a three tidded Eldritch God of Alpha Male energy. He is no mere Alpha Male, he is the Ralphamale! You will venerate his Guntalicious majesty, how dare lowly mortal creatures compare themselves to the Ragehog!

As someone currently eating eggs

Analingus is the most popular reddit sex act because it assumes that any two people could do it to each other. No actual genitalia are used in the act. So it's the most kweer friendly and egalitarian form of sex because it has nothing to do with a man's manhood or a woman's womanhood. An asexual alien race out there somewhere probably reproduces with this procedure

HES GONNA BE A FUTA!!! O:

Sir, step away from the eggplant. Thats a non-dilation eggplant

Drink water, retard.

for the purposes of wetting it doesn't count