random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

You monster!! YOU KILLED BETTY!!

more men die of workplace accidents than women
so in the issue of fairness, we're going to hold a lottery to kill random women

 

[KiwiFuzz]

personal tunnel vision

 

[Autistic Joe]

View attachment 2841945
Again?
>googbye

"This is my googbye"

 

[Virtual Boring]

“I drink Bud Lights! I don’t smoke crack!”

 

[Blackhole]

I had anal sex with Melinda Leigh Scott in front of her husband who jerked off to being cuckolded. This statement is HONEST CONTENT.

"You might wanna consider your actions and your speech"
I have, you're a stupid bitch and I'm in the right. #owned

"you don't lose, you just don't win"
t. the dumbest person, possibly ever

"What do PC gamers actually want"

FOR YOU TO SHOW ME THE FUCKING GAMES

I hate everyone; why treat women any differently?

I love Australians so god damn much

"Have we mentioned lately that you can actually eat bugs?! WERE YOU LISTENING? I DON'T THINK YOU LISTENED BECUASE YOU STILL AREN'T EATING BUGS!"

 

[lolnah]

 

[Wintersun]

A girl dumped you one time you so now you're blaming the holocaust on thots?

 

[Autistic Joe]

"High" [functioning] relative to what? You're a depressed faggot that's never even touched a chick.

 

[Delilah Radio Show]

I was raised to believe I am not retarded. And while my mom may have been wrong about a lot of things, I am sure she has to be right on this one at least.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Terrible idea. Calling them marital aids makes me feel bad about shoving a foot long bad dragon up my ass because I am not married. Stick to sex toys pls

 

[Opticana]

Dilation 3x/day isn’t always fun, but I’m reconnecting with Jewish liturgy about G-d’s creation of the human body (asher yatsar) and soul (elokai neshama), which I sing while dilating. It turns the painful dilation into an act of divine partnership and spiritual affirmation.

 

[SCSI]

Makes me wonder what an inverted duck cloaca would look like if ducks could troon out.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

Republicans are projecting their sexual frustrations onto my boyfriend's feet

 

[thisighuf]

 

[Meat Target]

At least I helped support the local economy by getting drunk and banging that midget hooker at the end of the bar.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

This is literally exactly like the time MacArthur left the Philippines because the US Army ran out of spoons and just couldn't even.....

 

[Zero Day Defense]

Imagine worrying about catching an illness and not licking your life

 

[Tard Police]

it's those damned, dirty jewish space lasers!

Teaching women to read and write was a mistake.

If you live in West Virginia and haven't killed at least two meth addicts in self defense, you obviously just moved there.

 

[Pinky Piedo the Tard]

 

[Sarah Connor]

Why yes, that is a mid-forties furry tranny who thinks he's five furries, a japanese goddess, and a computer program in one body. How did you guess?