random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[NoReturn]

"Ahhhhh, time to sit down and shoop some tards"

 

[SevenEightNine]

If I ever become a cripple, I hope I become one that gets to die with dignity and not one of the whiny ones.

Sounds like her brain's crippled too.

Why should I listen to you when you couldn't even do a trampoline stunt at seaworld?

You can't just bring that up and then not elaborate. You just fucking can't. Fuck you.

Today I learned that being woke is a bigger disability than being in a wheelchair.

You ruined your life in the most embarrassing lame way possible, stop overcompensating and anhero already, you been stealing oxygen for nearly a quarter of a century

This single thread was the source of so much...

 

[Stabmaster Arson]

Damn. You found the comment of him saying he is a Pedophile.

 

[PhoBingas]

One troon over the line sweet Jesus
One troon over the line
Sittin' downtown in a railway station
One troon over the line

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Now I need to dox your rapist so I can send him my condolences.

This is my OC Yonta, he has freezing magic and hates the gays.

Tell him to register an account and discuss the matter as I would love to hear the thoughts of a person who charges $50 for that pile of dogshit.

By the way, this is perfectly legal. If you didn't want me to dox you, you shouldn't have left your personal info lying out in the open, then given me a reason to look for all of it.

You have no idea what kind of shitstorm you just unleased.
We are going to hunt you down. We are going to find out everything about you. Your friends, your family, we're going to find them all. And then, well, I'll let you imagine what happens next.

We are Kiwi Farms.
We do not forgive.
We do not forget.
Expect us.

Sir I'm afraid I'm going to need a picture of your dick.

This thread will become a null complaint email generator in no time

I use the same name across all the platforms I use, even dating services. If I don't I won't be able to build my e-reputation and become internet famous.

It's also easy because I only have to remember one username and password.

He also posted a cat dick in response to someone making fun of him.

Thanks for sharing. I lost it when I saw he had a stormfront account where he unironically posted "Argentinians are white"

For the newer users, a bit of forum lore. The Sunglow event horizon also resulted in notorious forum woman respecter @Dyn (aka Dynastia aka HG400) being not only allowed but encouraged by mods, to go on random doxing sprees of easy targets in the now-defunct tumblr forum, in an effort to encourage better cybersecurity habits among autistic women and gays.

If you have an issue about the content which I write please feel free to email a complaint to your nearest mental health office.

It's almost like there's a link between the furry fandom and mental retardation

if a person tries to dox me, I'll just say:
"shut up, nigger"
and that will stop him

I think I'm pretty safe, but I'll never feel safe enough to start kicking a nest full of vengeful autistic hornets.

You cannot dox a concept

I see you rated my post Informative and then changed it to Agree.

I feel bad for the little kid on reddit who apparently has the same username as me and just wants to play pokemans

can I post about that politisperg guy who posts like 1000 times a day in A&N who dropped his email in a group chat then people googled it and he was cooming to gay incest pedophilia fanfic about gay underaged twins getting ritually shaved and having a chastity cage pierced onto their dicks by their father?

Searching my username will show you one of two things:
1. Cool space phenomena
2. Black pornstars doing anal.

Comments were sane, telling him to end it (the 'relationship', not his life)

We live in a post-modern society. I can only hope for the day when we live in a post-nut one.

>GIRL POWER t-shirt
>I want a man to piss into my mouth!

I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that she said she wants a guy to piss in her pussy, or the fact that she never mentioned her mouth but we all knew that was on the agenda anyway.

Car sex. Why?!?!?

nah im good on that man. that shits awkward. we would bang sluts. half the time i didnt even like the sluts i was just doing it cause of the male bonding experience im aware at how fucking gay that sounds but it wasnt that way.

Sluts come and go. But gang bang bros? That's special.

I have a personal lolcow who went poly right around the time she got involved in hard-left politics, trooned out, and started communicating heavily in Disney/Harry Potter references.

Anyone using the word "hubby" should be sent to a deathcamp.

OP appears to be an elderly French Canadian whore.

You guys should google my username

I'm pretty sure most people here are able to hold a normal conversation with their dad.

Nah, I'm not hurting at all. I'm balling and winning and collecting dough like an Easy Bake oven. Real talk though, you probably shouldn't be on this website dog, you're too on the spectrum, and I don't say that to be cruel; you're simply in an environment where your tendencies aren't a positive.

Karate Kong is reproducing by osmosis and you're hung up on the bottom part of the tree?

"Time to Donkey Kong Jungle Beat my meat"

This site attracts some real fucking mental cases, I tell you h'wat.

@OrsonZedd Please elaborate on this conclusion, my understanding of the Monkeyverse is shattering

lol @OrsonZedd is ontologically fat and I would not have sex with him

I'm against parents using physical punishment, but Alan-Michael White's dad should have hit him when he was a kid. Maybe then he wouldn't turn into a Crayola-eating manchild that faps to fictional gorillas.

"If you don't think the incestuous rape of children is hilarious, you're ONTOLOGICALLY EVIL!"

"Can we talk about the elephant in the room?"

Bruh, it's you you fat fuck. You're the elephant.

"guys i fwink bein mean to pwepo is bawud. we've gwoewn as a peepwuw. bwack wives mattuw"

Dont. Pozload. My. Neghole.

Absolutely. I work on cleaning crew at a sports facility, and there’s always a few penises on the floor of the men’s showers at the end of the day. We’ve got a special lost and found box just for them.

Here is an exercise for lady kiwis, although in the spirit of inclusivity the gentlemen are welcome too. Why not try this on your large manly thighs too?
- take a piece of A4 or letter sized paper
-lay it on your thigh
-contemplate the size of that paper vs the size of your thigh
-imagine someone skinning that area.

Go for it silly troon, ask the butcher for a fat lady pussy.

 

[I am vomit]

Nobody's going to stop shooting at you just because you're hiding behind Chris, so you better hope that Chris is dense enough to stop bullets.

Ahh Twitter. You can't talk about Tibet, but you can post pictures of yourself fucking a plush in a diaper. While also being a Nazi.

Fuck you Alan Michael White for exposing me to Winnie the Pooh trying to fuck Piglet.

He probably had his first orgasm while listening to the DK Rap

I figured the prolapsing chimp anuses had awakened something within him.

 

[Hamplanet Fitness]

She's conveniently forgetting her posts about pissing in mugs and leaving cups of decaying plant water around and filling jars with chunks of her dead yellow callused skin.

 

[Maricón de Mierda]

Is Kiwi Farms gonna store data on our sex toy preferences now?

oh fffffuck is that a baby monkey?

The American ADA act makes it illegal for me to discriminate on the basis of disability, intellectual or otherwise. I a m an equal opportunity doxer.

Only in Kiwifarms a silly thread about usernames would derail into unveiling some fat retard's Donkey Kong fetish
Love you guys

but then you know I got to high school and I started to do a lot more philosophical teaching uh um thinking, I started to watch a lot of Star Trek Next Generation uh and I started to notice I wasn't nearly as dogmatic as a lot of my community were.

 

[I am vomit]

I don't "target minors" but I do support lowering the age of consent.

 

[Meat Target]

View attachment 3554444
The oldfag lies as easily as he breathes.

Stories of an obese pig man hiding in the wilderness outside of Milwaukee, emerging only to prey upon terrified black children, makes for a great urban legend. It doesn't make for a great Kiwi Farms thread.

 

[SuperShibuyaFighter]

@I am vomit crap you beat me to it lol

 

[Lewisite]

personally I'm content to simply be racist at all times

I can no longer recollect what a natural pussy looks like

I saw something about free peaches but I haven't seen that nor any kiwi fruit anywhere

I think I got tricked

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

I'm unreasonably upset that Stitch has a horse dick

He has resting stranger danger face.

 

[Elim Garak]

Never thought I'd see the day that a dick length would start with minus.

 

[Anna O]

I know that after my surgery I will have a Satanic Pussy.

 

[SCSI]

(I know this first one is old but the thread just got bumped and it made me laugh.)

*shitty porno midi plays*
Hey, sexy. Can I fix your washing machine?

Yeah female cocks you fuckin shitlord. I'm not gay but boy do I love penis (women's penises(women with penises(not men(I'm not gay))))

Woes? As the owner of a gigantic penis, my complaints are few.

There is nothing worse for society than somebody who thinks they know what's best for society

A&H got featured? Who woulda thunk it would be spooderman and the gays.

I added the disagree sticker because Spider-Man uses a toilet like a human unlike most spiders. This is a serious discussion, please try to be mature.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Imagine expecting people to honestly self-report their income when you can't even honestly self-report your gender.

The baker should have to wear a gunt net or smth that's not food safe

-Vegan Eggs Benedict (if Ms. Georgina Sparklepony isn't scheduled for a dilation)

Imagine not wanting to be a badass warrior. Homosexual. No wonder priests are so into little boy ass.

Nothing like a two inch skin pocket to make you feel like a real manly man, eh my dude bro kings?

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

"Please reddit I want to make sex with house people when other house person not in house but how I do sex with people in house but not that person the other person??"

I hope Jesus comes down from heavan and punish these degenerates.

Stay-Puft Marshmallow Troon

Nobody identifies as a cousinsexual.

"Keeping" a good woman is pretty much a 50/50 dice roll in western cultures, and basically trivial in eastern cultures.

Yoga in 4chan: yo how I get the schizophrenia any% speedrun

His penis saddness is so big

brobrobrobrokingbroking

none of the ladyboys I know

 

[Socrates]

Pablo: [shrugging and wiggling his manly eyebrows] "Bite the pillow, girl -- Daddy's driving the Poo Train to Hershey Station , gonna express deliver a load of Monkeypox."

 

[Sealbaby]

“Oh mah gawd I looove that dress penis!”

“It’s sooo adorable on you!”