random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

Who is bankrolling this shit? Please tell me it's not my taxes because I'm about to grow a beard and transition into my father who's always complaining about his taxes

 

[.T.N.U.C]

This frog-lipped, Eddie Munster-hairline-having faggot needs to be kicked in the face, set on fire, and thrown down some concrete cellar stairs.

His Michael Jackson "dancing" at the wax museum was unacceptable, even to mock.

probably lies in bed and attempts to tickle himself

 

[IamnottheNSA]

View attachment 5325852

cant trust them ladyboys

 

[Maricón de Mierda]

We sharing gynecologist stories? Great. Let me tell you about this bizarre bitch I encountered a few years ago.

he says he wanted to eat out his wife's ass after she pooped because apparently he has "that dog in [him]".

My political opinions? Depends who I'm trolling.

How the fuck do you get to the point in your life where you have to write an essay to justify spending 22 dollars on avocado toast? How do you get to the point where you spend 22 dollars on avocado toast? What the hell even is avocado toast?

This piece of shit is unbefuckinglievable. The chair-straining blob of what used to be a adult man is gasping for breath with every sentence, and now his voice is unmistakably tinged with groaning notes of chronic pain, and he's using these precious moments of (barely fitting the concept) life in order to lecture us on fucking fast-food chicken nuggets. What an absolute goddamn waste of existence.

I never wanted to read the word "Fapcraft" and my life is worse for having done so.

 

[Gentlebastard]

People will continue to laugh and enjoy things you dislike without your permission or approval. Cry harder, faggot.

I never wanted to read the word "Fapcraft" and my life is worse for having done so.

"Scientists labor to find out what the hell is the deal with Japan."

TBH he could have easily santamaxxed and turned into a jollycel. now he's just another obese troon with sad titties

No one turns people against troons more than troons themselves. To know them is to hate them.

The virgin farm larper in Vermont vs the Chad Israeli settler in Occupied Palestine.

how the fuck do you get off sexually to minecraft of all things? its just blocks. next you tell me people get of jerking it to among us.

please say it aint so.

You can always change a stupid name if you don't like it. You can't regrow your dick.

oh god its worse than i imagined.

*Leans back in recliner*

Sonny, back in my day we would fire up the ol' internet and masturbate to actual men and women having sex. None of us would be caught dead beating off to "craft-mine" or "leg-oh" stuff or whatchamacallit. They'd get more than bullied. They'd get stoned.

Kids these days...

I fucking hate DRM. DRM and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race.

*Opens legs* Wanna know how I got these scars?

Your first mistake was being on Tumblr.

I will eat the beef
I will live in my house
and I will be happy

 

[verymuchawful]

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/trannies-posting-their-ls-online.149396/post-16778299

https://www.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/16eck92/bathroom_discrimination_at_work/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

they put a human guard by the men's room who would call me out by name if I got too close

 

[Pendulous Dong]

Only the internet can provide groom to tomb service like this.

 

[Poonocchio]

Even more than the rest of the neovagina, it's just so obviously a chunk of mutilated cockmeat that it's really difficult to see what the surgeon was even going for.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

Vote to change the phrase "in Minecraft" to "in Roblox".

 

[200MB]

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/christopher-gesualdi-vito-gesualdi-vito-vito-the-pedo.171349/post-16777025

Sometimes I daydream about meeting a beautiful young girl while I'm there and us confessing our love to each other on the roof of the school before making out passionately, with the kind of intense love only a young lonely gaijin lost in Japan trying to find himself and a shy yet determined Japanese girl who hates her misunderstanding parents for trying to force her to accept traditional Japanese ideals can have.

 

[Lithuophile]

Oh noooo someone wanted to kill Roblox pedos! How horrible!!

 

[JustSomeDong]

But all you need to make an undetectable AI redditor is a finite state machine that cycles through "The old reddit switcheroo" -> "Edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger" -> "I'd tongue punch her in the fart box".

 

[Aunt Carol]

No, you gotta understand, I HAVE TO BE IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE MEN, I HAVE TO SEE THEIR DICKS AT THE URINAL

THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I CAN FEEL SAFE, IF I SEE THE DICKS

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

We did it cons, we won! Free range sodomy and genital mutilation is now only for adults! Just as god intended.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

flat-earth and globalists are both wrong, earth is laid out in a circle. I propose to prove this by buying a hot-air balloon and floating up till I hit Australia. Also, if you a dig down too deep, you fall out of the circle.

Sigh. I miss the days when we understood that a teenager bitching about dudes with cars was just jealous that he doesn't have a car himself.

I study the Way of Jamsheed and use an RPG-7 for both home defense and counter-sniping.

I use a spear gun because I need to protect what hearing I have left.

That and I'm going to get that bastard Aqua Man some day for stealing my gold fish.

 

[Pedophobe]

There is nothing about this entire thing that isn't autistic as fuck.

Why is the internet full of degenerates? Can't I enjoy my cat videos in peace without fat retarded trannies?

To be fat and dickless does not make you a woman.

The sex offender registry is not a terrorism watch list.

 

[Pee Cola]

Open source hookers? I'm not sure I like the sound of that.

 

[Autistic Joe]

Niggers dont understand
The food isnt bland
They just lost their taste buds in a gang shootout

 

[Clotso Coof]

"I swear he said 'I'm going to did-diddly-diddle you, boy!'"

 

[Brain Power]

What the fuck, is there a degenerate full moon out tonight or something?