random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[HyperboreanRightsActivist]

I am self aware and the ones who need self awareness are you guys because you’re only playing directly into my hands.

just don‘t touch me I’m sterile.

You Will Never Be Obama?

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Why is paying for sex pathetic? Is paying for food pathetic?

 

[Jimmy Hopkins]

JOSHUA DUMB CUNT

WE GONNA TAKE YOUR SITE DOWN LETS PLAY
YOU GONNA FUCKING LOOSE ILL LEAK ALL YOUR EMAILS OF THE USERS THAT USE YOUR SITE USERNAMES PASSWORD EMAILS AND EVEN THERE IP ADDRESSES AND ISP AND THERE REAL LOCATIONS INCLUDING YOURS MOTHER FUCKER DUMB CUNT JOSHUA ARE YOU SURE YOURE YOU FUCK YOUR MUM I THINK YOU DO MMM YOU LIKE IT HAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA

WE DA FUCKING BEST 0_O

Posted by JOSHUA DUMB CUNT on https://web.archive.org/web/2019051...dy-potter-defends-son-from-harassment-victim/

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Did he touch you inappropriately and then reward you with a Nintendo session?

 

[AltisticRight]

I honestly love seeing him get little Ws against the alogarchy.

 

[Poonocchio]

The legend of the Fupacabra will be spoken about for eons in Taxco

 

[Meiwaku]

From user @Ed Weed who has his own thread about creeping into female Kiwis DMs

 

[LurkTrawl]

You're having the vapours about shit like "her pert pink nipples jutted out defiantly from her glorious tits" and "her juices flowed from her tight little honeypot down her creamy inner thighs" meanwhile I'm over here dodging omegaverse mpreg shit with guys pooping full grown babies out their asshole.

 

[Gentlebastard]

"In-N-Out to close Oakland location, cites crime"

For a certain small population of California yuppies - this - not welfare spending, not rape and crime rates elsewhere, nor the ruination of culture, will be the straw that breaks the camels back on the Nigger Question

Thousands of men are ruined and lost to us. It has been journo'd into existence.

We're making Jenkem nigga.

I'm gonna go think about how I've underestimated just how retarded people really are.

As a dog returneth to its vomit, so does a nigger to his nigging.

If a catheder turns you on, you need to be institunalized. The pee hole is for piss and jizz, not solids!

See, your mistake is that you're using logic and consistency, and the trans movement has neither.

ill be honest with ya buddy i dont base my life choices on what some african in the savanna is doing right now

youre not Diogenes, bro, youre on the internet on a New Zealandian bird herding forum pointing and laughing at stupid people

Maybe it's a not-having-an-IQ-two-standard-deviations-below-the-human-norm-and-being-literally-retarded thing.

"Unemployed alcoholic" is not a job.

I get being against consoomerism, but carrying a water bottle at all is a weird hill for you to power level and die on.

I guess there's hope for me yet, I just need to have zero standards and settle for a troon.

"Living Well with Montel" featuring a fat manlet who has had 4 strokes before he's 55 is pretty funny.

Well you know what they say:

If you can't handle the heat, erect a wall preventing anyone from interacting with the kitchen.

Or something like that.

 

[Spud]

I know when I was a kid, I've been taught to rape anything and everything that moves!

We had an entire grading period dedicated to demeaning positions.

I was self taught.

 

[MrJokerRager]

Don't worry Europe, Russia won't invade you, the hordes of migrants you invited have that taken care of.

 

[MrJokerRager]

I don't want to defend importing infinity niggers, making all kids gay and with mutilated genitals, and hating white people. Train me up and I'll be fighting Westminster.

They will never take me anyway. No vaccines for me (I will physically resist) and I'm calling everyone who is my superior a nigger. Telling them I hate fags and kikes. They will never hold me. I'd go AWOL at the first chance and frag as many of the faggot upper class officer niggers as I could.

London delenda est.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

Who would you root for between Wang "The Cock" Johnson and Butt "The Shitman" Fart?

 

[MrJokerRager]

Imagine making this thread and not including a picture of the chick. You fail.

 

[Mad_Dog]

It's like she used to only hate herself as a hobby and now she's gone pro

 

[chalkyresidue]

Spanish is often disappointing in its profanity.

One time I was working with some Dominican guys, and I asked them what about ducks (pato) is gay.

The answer? “Idk, they walk funny.”

 

[Aunt Carol]

I don't know about the Reese's ice cream, but my parents were disappointed by the Kit Kat ice cream.

My family came over and went, "What the FUCK is that smell?" (I have lost my sense of smell.)
It turns out that a giant vase full of living onions smells like onions.
My family stole my onions and cooked them with fried rice and we ate them for supper.
I still think keeping a couple in a jar in the kitchen window is okay, but uh maybe don't keep a hundred in your bedroom.

This is the thread for wholesome quotes, right?

 

[Brain Power]

You're such a bad poster that you got a perfect royal flush of negative stickers. I don't think I"ve ever seen that before.

 

[Law]

ive noticed this online women constantly talk about periods my mom never did i did not know they even existed intill i was online so women tell me why do you constantly talk periods

This poster is probably a child so I feel kind of bad, but this is one of the funniest sentences I've read on this website.

 

[LurkTrawl]

McMahon named the sex toys so that the color of the toy matched the race of the wrestler—for example, a black “dildo” would be named after an African American wrestler and a white “dildo” would be named after a Caucasian wrestler.

During a David-versus-Goliath-type wrestling match in 2019, Ms. Grant shared with McMahon her thoughts on the event, the draw of rooting for the underdog, and ideas for future events. McMahon complimented her creative input. She believed she was being taken seriously—that is, until McMahon named a dildo after the smaller wrestler and attempted to sexualize the situation, diminishing her input.