random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Speedrunner]

I did not have sexual relations with that boy.

 

[Rotollo 2]

Manage your dick, or it will manage you, and it's a retard.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Let porky come after me, those e-scooters are 10x more fun to drive drunk than my car.

You don't fuck on your bed, that's a rookie mistake

And how many famous male celebrity dicks have you seen, Mr. Doublefag?

Your username tells a lot about you. Got me a chuckle anyways, so thanks.

If the horse is drunk but you're not does that still count as a DUI?

I've been browsing this thread on and off all day and all I can walk away with so far is that some of the 4chan jannies really, really like their interracial cuck porn.

Can this jeetnigger shut up

sometimes i turn it off on youtube to try and find really shit ads sometimes
I genuinely don't get how youtube thinks playing the same 5 ads will be at all effective at getting people to purchase a product

The front page has been destroyed.
All boards destroyed.
Significant 'ack posting in side chans.
Receiving no new posts from anywhere in the imageboard... not even BBC spam.

View attachment 7225240

No one's left. Everyone's gone. 4chan is burning.

On 4chan, jannie post coaltent that break rule. When honestjak report coaltent, jannie ban honestjak for false report and post more coaltent. Then jannie goon to 'p.

/x/ wasn't worth it. It's crime was not being schizophrenic. It's crime was being boring and schizophrenic.

yo is that dress on the troon black and blue or white and gold?

Not that hard to do tbh
>Call the janny a nigger
>report my own post so he has to see it
>ban evade to do it again

Sure I can watch rekt threads of indians getting hit by trains all day but when I have to see the things I jack off to getting brutally murdered that's where I draw the line.

I think america should just nuke japan and eliminate the cancer that is anime

Man I really wish we were some sort of L33T H4X0r amoral shadowy cabal like some people think but I think we might just be queens that laugh at people who eat their own shit.

Woahhh a tranny into mutilation porn of women. Never would have expected that.

honestly, I think the jews did it

I smell a mexican

I think it would be a nice gesture to send invites to every email address leaked and when they register on KF they get an “undocumented illegal” badge so we never forget where they came from.

Those are master gooners my man

You think they spent all day moderating?

No sir, they spent all day masturbating

We start learning how many of them have jewish mothers and Kanye West wins the presidency in 2028 as a direct consequence.

There is an unlisted anime board but you have to send a DM to Null and tell him your favorite anime and your waifu. He doesn't let casuals in so be detailed with the reasons for your choices.

Do you know what assrape is? It's like that, just that the victim has also been shot seven times in the chest by a fucking 50AE Deagle

I bought weed in high school illegally, we all have dark past bro.

I made a joke thread on there one time about Supernanny (UK TV show where some lady teaches parents how to handle their kids' bad behavior) and it devolved into a thread where people discussed how they wanted Jo Frost to rape them as a shota or some shit.

Trannies are like the termites of the internet

What's the meal where I just eat things like a Skyrim character? Sometimes I'll just eat a chicken breast and a head of romaine lettuce and be done with it.

Sometimes if I don't wanna cook I just slice an apple and eat it with whatever scraps of leftover meat I have. If I'm really lazy I don't even slice it and just munch apple then take bite of meat. It's good with turkey and chicken.

Don't you guys know that soliciting random women who walk past you on public sidewalks is the most surefire way to meet women?

Thai women don't exist. They're self reproducing bugs and the weaker males castrate themselves for visiting bugs.

I get the feeling a lot of shootings happen at Asian massage parlors.

"My name is Ye and I sucked my cousins dick till I was 14"

this downward spiral would be a lot more sad if it wasn't so funny.

KANYE NO. NO! NOT LIKE THIS NIGGA!

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

How often are you getting hit in the balls that you need to have a thought-out plan for when it happens?

 

[PunkinMan]

SHHUUUUUUTTTT THE FUCK UUUP, HOW THE FUCK DO I MUTE YOU NIGGAS LIKING MY POSTS, GEEZ NIGGA I KNOW I'M REMARKABLY WITTY AND HANDSOME BUT FKING HELL WHY DO I NEED 9 BILLION NOTIFS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE AGREE WITH WHAT I SAID FUCK SATAN ON A CROSS STFU!

 

[CaddestSlown]

Feed me the three gorges dam.

On another note, my kid liked when I did IRL paw patrol

Some of you 4chan refugees are okay.

 

[Diggus Bickus]

Another week, another "Debate a nonce" thread in Mass Debates.

 

[Pork Wellington]

I got banned from a laser tag place for doing a melee attack.

 

[Towoman]

Uh oh. Mom found the Kiwifarms thread!

 

[Disc]

I open twitter and see right wingers discussing some sort of hypothetical Derek Chauvin vs. Karmelo Anthony death battle. Meanwhile a Democrat says something 1/10 as edgy and it's an 'aesthetic' worthy of op-eds. This is why their party is losing

 

[Aunt Carol]

I will not let someone who indirectly killed seven people shit on The Apothecary Diaries.

 

[Oliver Onions]

Picture this, but with an iPad, an 8-ball of cocaine, and a polycule upstairs

 

[Useful_Mistake]

View attachment 7260352

"Go watch the gay porn [...] You'll feel better"

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Are you trying to say Orange Man isn't bad?

 

[Gentlebastard]

A lot of shit is gonna change when Null gets sworn in as Pope. I'm calling it.

One time while killing time in an airport bar I met a guy from Wales whose life dream was to go on a trip to Philadelphia, and my first question to him was "Why?"

Shutting the fuck up is a useful life skill.

Pro Tip: Roll the stick of butter around in salt before you eat it to keep your hands from getting messy.

How is a voice clip from a video game making this nerd seethe so much?

Almost all of his behavior can be tied back to not evolving his thought beyond grade school.

Who spends this much time thinking about fucking emojis?

 

[The Nothingness]

It's like watching a bunch of retards in special education.

 

[Pattern Noticer]

Suck dick or not. There is no try.

 

[vomitusdeux]

i cant take a man with big pink nipples seriously.

He also wrote a furry fanfic on Muslim terrorist attack in Paris called "Long Lost Brotherhood", where he feels bad for the Muslims.

Anon jailbreaks (and fucks) a Vaporeon

Niggas really be bartering over pixels nowadays

If I was a doctor and my patient showed me their 700 page long KF thread I think I would just kill myself.

LETS GO!! ITS MAIL WITH COCKS!

Are you Still Trouble These Issuues?

• Pee Everywhere
• Destroy the Plant
• Scratch the Furniture
• Chewing Shoes

Cat balls
Your little helper.

If you breed and Injun and an Indian do they get double firewater and streetshitting powers?

The more retarded version, that is about as useful as an autistic 12 year old when a train is within their visual field, is free.

You think you’ve grown numb to Kanye’s relentless schizoposting, then he casually admits to sucking incest cock. You got me, Ye.

Oh my fucking god. The music he is putting out lately is kino but i preferred the melodic heil hitlers to this last track.

My question is, what is wrong with black people?

Is molestation how lolcows reproduce?

Now the type of white woman you attract will statistically depend on the breed of dog you are jacking off as well as specific Beyonce album thats being played.

 

[Tablet County]

Welsh Chris-chan learned the horrible truth about the world and became a psychotic volcel rather than an incel tranny.

Perhaps if he hadn't tried to murder those jerkops he would have created a comic in Welsh. He could have called it Soghnwychllyu.

When philosophers say with "start with the ancient Greeks" they're talking about sucking dick. Ye knows this.

Like if something unfortunate happened to someone close to him back then I don't think he would be saying "LMAO GET FUCKED NIGGERFAGGOT"

 

[Harvey Danger]

the farms are the natural predator of trannies (exposure)
trannies are the natural predator of anons (disruption)
anons were the natural predator of glowniggers and jews (exposure)
glowniggers and jews (lawyers) are the natural predator of the farms (disruption)