random_text.txt

[Joe Dough 68]

make me some more clout joshy

Source, from the Bluesky thread.

 

[Drip Torch]

Im not an meme

 

[BirdUp]

itd be pretty neat if chris throat is slit and then immediately sewn back and hes bleeding and crying but he isnt dead. then i punch him in his fat nose twice and kick him in the head and hes still crying but he isnt dead. then i tape barb's left femur, ribcage, and ankle skin to chris' chest and set his arms on fire. then i nailgun him to a heavy wooden board and pretend that hes dead and i ignore him for a few minutes and then he calls for help and i retaliate by shoving burnt candles down his throat.

OMG gaiz dis is liek, totally original kay

liek rlly originl, yo

hers my plaaaaannnnnnnnn!!111111!!1!111111!1!1!11


We bash Barb's skull in with a rock while Chris is away with his sweetheart and write "Fags Get Out" on the wall in her blood.

Today I plan on making a post online in which I claim to hold certain beliefs, whilst simultaneously espousing the entirely opposite belief within reality. It is a rather clever yarn to pull on unsuspecting members of the online community, you see, because they will read my covertly insincere post and believe that I hold some ridiculous or foolish notion when, in fact, I do not. They may even suspect that I am below a certain level of average intelligence. Meanwhile, I will be enjoying the knowledge that it was nothing but a successful ruse.

 

[The Judean People's Front]

"Basically today was a shitshow, and we were completely not prepared" - Liz Fong-Jones

 

[Gog & Magog]

I can only assume his addled brain contains pieces of the memory of himself training his kids to say "mommy and daddy and second mommy and second daddy didn't do any cocaine, and what is cocaine, I don't even know what drugs are, also if we did do drugs it was someone else's fault."

 

[Buttigieg2020]

Being Ass raped to death by a monster isn’t gay. It adds to the horror.

 

[Haffhart]

gradual and total enshittification

 

[Dire Dire Cocks]

 

[Aunt Carol]

of all things in life to stake your emotional state on
i would not recommend it being this

EVEN THE MILFS ARE GETTING IN ON THE PISS WAVE!

 

[JustSomeDong]

I want to fuck Kamala

Kamala definitely has a hairy vagina, bc she’s a democrat, which I absolutely fuck with. I sometimes jerk my shit imagining I’m fucking her with her big tits, but I think her face is ugly as fuck so I imagine her face as a hyena. Am I weird. Fuck no, she has suckable hyena dd cup tits, maybe even e cups. I will not stop until I can fuck Kamala because my dick will not be satisfied until it goes inside Kamala. I like fucking furries, but Kamala is the final boss. Can any of y’all help me?

 

[Syzyg]

maybe if Null did a performative dance while half the screen was subway surfer they'd pay attention to a video instead

 

[CEO of Gay]

kiwi farms is just "Russian bots" for trans folks, huh?

 

[Lifeguard Hermit]

Oh fuck, I'm not even safe in sad threads from you solzhenitsyns. Please quit breathing.

 

[DickMain]

For a second I thought he finally died or said something this time, but it's just arguing about pronouns because someone saw a fucking Tumblr post.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Hello Kiwi Farms.

This is the official account of Vice President-elect J.D. Vance. I fully support everything Joshua Moon has done and I will do everything in my power to serve the American people.

No, I'm actually J.D. Vance.

ok, faggot

No, I'm Dirty Dan J.D. Vance!

It's actually me, guys.

Barron, tell the boomers to stop being gay faggots.

 

[Dr. Butt]

First of all, Stalin had a better moustache.

 

[hl2_linux]

This is a part of your personal punishment from the divine for letting skibbidi Biden happen.

 

[BirdUp]

Penus Status: Still no erection to this day.

 

[DickMain]

(dunno if it's in good taste to quote a chomo for random_txt, but we have plenty of shitty people in it already so)

 

[BirdUp]

It cannot be said that the discovery of Pluto inspired the writing of the tale. C. W. Tombaugh had discovered the planet on February 18, 1930, after ten months of searching, but it was first announced on the front page of the New York Times only on March 14, to coincide with the 147th anniversary of the discovery of Uranus and the seventy-fifth anniversary of the birth of Percival Lowell, who had himself searched for a trans- Neptunian planet. HPL was tremendously captivated by the discovery: the day after its announcement he writes, "Whatcha thinka the NEW PLANET? HOT STUFF!!! It is probably Yuggoth" (HPL to James F. Morton, [March 15, 1930]; AHT).