Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Smithfield Ham]

I'd bet Bob has never read Capital or sat thru a Marx bros film.

If Bob understood Karl Marx's ideology he would despise the man, because his beloved Neoliberal is everything Marx hated and railed against. And his bullshit about culling the midwest "wasteland" would definitely not fly.

Neolibs like Bob tend to see communism as a cute little quirky distraction for the younger generation of leftists to play around with until they become part of the corporate system like good pigs. They don't see it the way we do, as a genocidal trainwreck that has a success rate lower than new age cancer treatments. And they don't see themselves the way commies see them: as mindless capitalist drones and controlled opposition brainwashed to keep the masses placated with meaningless crap and under the thumb of champagne-swilling plutocrats who want to knock their houses down and drive them into homelessness so they can build more strip malls.

Most of Breadtube are unapologetic tankies who think the USSR was totally cool, so you can imagine what Bob's rants about wanting to bulldoze the entire midwest and replace all the low-income homes with shopping malls make them feel.

 

[Tronathon242]

Huh, I could sworn..ooooo...the guys who wrote the script, that's why I thought of James Gunn, those mofos are related to his ass.

Also, re-watching this Suicide Squad 2 trailer, I can't believe it but this damn movie repeated the same mistake as the first one did. Again, they're trying to pit the SS against a massive "call all superheroes right now!" level threat. Seriously, SS is usually sent to deal with shit the government can easily cover up

Basically, the Suicide Squad is made of criminals or small-time supervillans who have bombs implanted in their heads. They are sent to do various black ops/dirty stuff for the government, if they survive and do the task they'll get their sentence cutdown if shit goes bad? Well, they either die or get their heads blown up so the American government can go "Nope, we had nothing to do with this". Usually, in the comics they are sent out to deal with small stuff..like....in one issue they had this zombie virus outbreak in this town, so they sent the SS to figure out what started it, find patient zero and terminate anyone who was infected.

Having the SS do their typical thing wouldn't work so well with the typical movie treatment because people would expect capeshit, so capeshit is what we get. It's funny how DC can actually make something that is akin to what they normally do with their animated films but can't do that with their big budget MCU copycat universe. Then again, the DC animated films are the only great things they've made in this era.

You would have thought that the 2010 midterms and the 2016 presidential election would have shown them that won't work.

There's a reason Pelosi is throwing her weight behind the "For the People Act." It would remedy that problem for them for good.

Because Gunn needs to continually re-establish his nerd credentials so the fanboys continue to worship him. Starro is a terrible pick for the Suicide Squad to fight, considering Superman has trouble with him even with the Justice League backing him up. But respective power levels be damned, let's have the edgy Batman wannabes take down someone Big Blue can't solo. See, I'm already a better critic than Cinema Robert.

Your average normie isn't going to know who Starro is and consoomers like Bob will gush sexual fluids over it regardless.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

This is going to sound weird to anyone who wasn't into comic books, but the fact that changed Special Agent Amanda Waller into a thin chick really bugs me.

There was something about the obese government official who holds the power of life and death in her hands that really spoke to government excess and lack of oversight.

Making her thin and pretty gives more a "YASSS KWEEN!" vibe to it.

For reference:
View attachment 2031674
Amanda Waller: Heartless Bureaucrat, Total Bitch, Ruthless Cog in the Machine.

View attachment 2031676
Having a glass of wine probably after fucking over a small country.

View attachment 2031675
Everyone in this picture has her dick firmly lodged in their ass.

But then....

DIVERSITY!
View attachment 2031671

And then:

View attachment 2031672

But does someone like Cinematic Bloberto even touch on this? Fuck no. He won't touch the social or cultural reasons, how it actually damages the character to make her a "YEESSSS KWEEEN YOU CAN DO IT!" type outfighting Batman, and how they've managed to reduce her to just, to use Anita Sarkesian's words: Fighting Fuckdoll.

Back in the day Amanda Waller was one of the most dangerous people to walk the face of the earth.

Now? She's just another Joss Weebdom waifu who don't need no man and is more dangerous than the villains she keeps.

And the whole thing loses something in the process.

So basically she was Stacey Abrams but with normal teeth?

...right now all it takes for him to crap his pants is a movie trailer.

FTFY

 

[EnemyStand]

So basically she was Stacey Abrams but with normal teeth?

No, because Waller was actually competent. Terrifyingly so, in fact. She could afford to be a fatty considering she had Deadshot and Killer Croc on speed dial. Stacy Abrams is the typical result of Dems not being able to just go away when they lose.

 

[Kabuki Actor]

Most of Breadtube are unapologetic tankies who think the USSR was totally cool, so you can imagine what Bob's rants about wanting to bulldoze the entire midwest and replace all the low-income homes with shopping malls make them feel.

Arousal!

 

[Mr._Blonde]

This is going to sound weird to anyone who wasn't into comic books, but the fact that changed Special Agent Amanda Waller into a thin chick really bugs me.

There was something about the obese government official who holds the power of life and death in her hands that really spoke to government excess and lack of oversight.

Making her thin and pretty gives more a "YASSS KWEEN!" vibe to it.

For reference:
View attachment 2031674
Amanda Waller: Heartless Bureaucrat, Total Bitch, Ruthless Cog in the Machine.

View attachment 2031676
Having a glass of wine probably after fucking over a small country.

View attachment 2031675
Everyone in this picture has her dick firmly lodged in their ass.

But then....

DIVERSITY!
View attachment 2031671

And then:

View attachment 2031672

But does someone like Cinematic Bloberto even touch on this? Fuck no. He won't touch the social or cultural reasons, how it actually damages the character to make her a "YEESSSS KWEEEN YOU CAN DO IT!" type outfighting Batman, and how they've managed to reduce her to just, to use Anita Sarkesian's words: Fighting Fuckdoll.

Back in the day Amanda Waller was one of the most dangerous people to walk the face of the earth.

Now? She's just another Joss Weebdom waifu who don't need no man and is more dangerous than the villains she keeps.

And the whole thing loses something in the process.

I fucking wholeheartedly agree. How badass was she? She fucking scares Batman. No weapons, no superpowers, just wearing a dress, staring him down and call him a little bitch. There was some implications she who he was. You have to have brass ones, REAL brass ones to make one of the world's scariest motherfucker piss himself.

The only surprise about Suicide Squad 2 is that.....I'm actually surprised they made the sequel.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

If Bob understood Karl Marx's ideology he would despise the man, because his beloved Neoliberal is everything Marx hated and railed against. And his bullshit about culling the midwest "wasteland" would definitely not fly.

Neolibs like Bob tend to see communism as a cute little quirky distraction for the younger generation of leftists to play around with until they become part of the corporate system like good pigs. They don't see it the way we do, as a genocidal trainwreck that has a success rate lower than new age cancer treatments. And they don't see themselves the way commies see them: as mindless capitalist drones and controlled opposition brainwashed to keep the masses placated with meaningless crap and under the thumb of champagne-swilling plutocrats who want to knock their houses down and drive them into homelessness so they can build more strip malls.

Most of Breadtube are unapologetic tankies who think the USSR was totally cool, so you can imagine what Bob's rants about wanting to bulldoze the entire midwest and replace all the low-income homes with shopping malls make them feel.

I have a memory of Bob speaking derisively about Marx before.

He probably doesn't do it often because it hurts his feelings so much when Twitter lefties tell him to go fuck himself.

 

[Reflections On The Screen]

Because Gunn needs to continually re-establish his nerd credentials so the fanboys continue to worship him. Starro is a terrible pick for the Suicide Squad to fight, considering Superman has trouble with him even with the Justice League backing him up. But respective power levels be damned, let's have the edgy Batman wannabes take down someone Big Blue can't solo. See, I'm already a better critic than Cinema Robert.

Man who the fuck cares about 'power levels?' We're talking about a giant sentient space starfish, people in silly spandex costumes, and a shark-man hybrid thing. Superhero stuff has always been campy stupid shit. I have no idea why people take these things so serious.

Isn't that what Bob does with the MCU? Treating them like momentous artistic masterpieces. Like none of these films are high art, besides maybe a few like Logan. Just sit back and enjoy them for what they are: popcorn films.

 

[EnemyStand]

Man who the fuck cares about 'power levels?' We're talking about a giant sentient space starfish, people in silly spandex costumes, and a shark-man hybrid thing. Superhero stuff has always been campy stupid shit. I have no idea why people take these things so serious.

Isn't that what Bob does with the MCU? Treating them like momentous artistic masterpieces. Like none of these films are high art, besides maybe a few like Logan. Just sit back and enjoy them for what they are: popcorn films.

I'm not saying you don't have a point. But I'm not treating it like a momentous artistic masterpiece. We all have our retarded hang ups, this is one of mine and it hurts my enjoyment of the film. Therefore, I will not watch it and instead do something else with that time and money. Unlike Bob, I'm sure despite our retarded hang ups we can make our comments or complaints and move on with our lives.

 

[Jet Fuel Johnny]

Man who the fuck cares about 'power levels?' We're talking about a giant sentient space starfish, people in silly spandex costumes, and a shark-man hybrid thing. Superhero stuff has always been campy stupid shit. I have no idea why people take these things so serious.

When it's your hobby, you take it seriously, even if other people find it silly.

One of the insulting things about it going mainstream is that attitude.

"You should be grateful the great and powerful Gunn is willing to show your pathetic hobby on the big screen. No, the actors don't need to read the comics, no, they don't have to stay true to your characters that you love, no, they don't have to care about power levels or internal consistency or even nearly a century worth the canon. You just kneel down, suck Gunn's dick, and give us your wallet."

Isn't that what Bob does with the MCU? Treating them like momentous artistic masterpieces. Like none of these films are high art, besides maybe a few like Logan. Just sit back and enjoy them for what they are: popcorn films.

Except, when it's your hobby, you can't enjoy it.

Tell a gun-nut to just sit back and enjoy The Walking Dead. Tell anyone who has a hobby to sit back and let Hollywood rape their hobby for money and that they'll be happy with it.

Fuck that. Hollywood needs to understand that if they want to do 'their vision' they can make their own shit up.

Stop murdering everyone else's hobbies so you can fuck the corpse.

Mainstream cannibalizing nerd culture and hobbies to dance around wearing its skin like Buffalo Bill is something that angers me.

 

[Positron]

Because Gunn needs to continually re-establish his nerd credentials so the fanboys continue to worship him. Starro is a terrible pick for the Suicide Squad to fight, considering Superman has trouble with him even with the Justice League backing him up. But respective power levels be damned, let's have the edgy Batman wannabes take down someone Big Blue can't solo. See, I'm already a better critic than Cinema Robert.

You mean you can't defeat everything with cheesy quips, penis jokes, and Margot Robbie's cleavage?

I have a memory of Bob speaking derisively about Marx before.

In fact Bobby has nothing good whatsoever to say about Marx, except when he bludgeons his opponents for not being as well-read as Bobby himself purportedly is.




At best he faults Marx for failing to envisage the so-called "intellectual" and "creative" industry:

 

[AutoGuyNoFile]

you can imagine what Bob's rants about wanting to bulldoze the entire midwest and replace all the low-income homes with shopping malls make them feel.

*looks around* But...the Midwest already *IS* low income homes with shopping malls! ...or it was...the shopping malls went out of business (and that was BEFORE Covid hit)...

 

[Caustic Gelatin]

Because Gunn needs to continually re-establish his nerd credentials so the fanboys continue to worship him. Starro is a terrible pick for the Suicide Squad to fight, considering Superman has trouble with him even with the Justice League backing him up. But respective power levels be damned, let's have the edgy Batman wannabes take down someone Big Blue can't solo. See, I'm already a better critic than Cinema Robert.

Funny you say that as it reminds me what I seen this on the wikipedia page for the movie.

• Idris Elba as Robert DuBois / Bloodsport:
  A mercenary with a technologically-advanced suit that only he can use. After shooting Superman with a Kryptonite bullet, he shortens his prison sentence by joining Task Force X so he can reunite with his daughter Tyla.[4] Elba was originally cast to replace Will Smith as Deadshot before his character was changed to Bloodsport to allow Smith the opportunity to return anytime as his character in future projects.[5][6]

I swear to god I heard a joke from somewhere about how if you can't get Will Smith for your movie just get Idris Elba. Seriously isn't that the exact same character motivation from the last movie, just with a different black guy this time?

 

[Reflections On The Screen]

When it's your hobby, you take it seriously, even if other people find it silly.

I can understand being upset at a poor adaption of an existing work, I myself just can't get angry over it. Life is too short to get mad over the plots/creative decisions of films/books/games to such an extent I see fellow nerds do.

Like the end of GOT was a disaster, a huge fucking shitshow, but I don't care about it anymore. One bad TV show doesn't impact my life at all.

Anyways I will stop talking about this. It is off-topic.

 

[Philly Phunk Machine]

Basically, the Suicide Squad is made of criminals or small-time supervillans who have bombs implanted in their heads. They are sent to do various black ops/dirty stuff for the government, if they survive and do the task they'll get their sentence cutdown if shit goes bad? Well, they either die or get their heads blown up so the American government can go "Nope, we had nothing to do with this". Usually, in the comics they are sent out to deal with small stuff..like....in one issue they had this zombie virus outbreak in this town, so they sent the SS to figure out what started it, find patient zero and terminate anyone who was infected.

Pretty much this. The concept had legs back in the 80s because of the Cold War and you could have the SS poking around Syria or the USSR trying to uncover homeland security threats. Also, the original run typically had a revolving cast of different villains depending on who got locked up in other comics; I remember the Penguin was in a storyline after Batman put him away.

It used to be a vehicle for writers to take obscure characters from the 60s or 70s and play around with them. Now it seems that you're destined to get killed off unless you're Deadshot, Harley Quinn or Capt Boomerang.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

At best he faults Marx for failing to envisage the so-called "intellectual" and "creative" industry:
View attachment 2032340

"Marx was bad because his system killed hundreds of millions of people" - most people
"Marx was bad because he no like to CONSOOM PRODUCT" - Movieblob

 

[EnemyStand]

Funny you say that as it reminds me what I seen this on the wikipedia page for the movie.


I swear to god I heard a joke from somewhere about how if you can't get Will Smith for your movie just get Idris Elba. Seriously isn't that the exact same character motivation from the last movie, just with a different black guy this time?

Especially since the actual Robert DuBois version of Bloodsport was a Vietnam draft dodger who became a LARPER when his brother got his limbs blown off pretending to be him. Bloodsport was given weapons by Lex Luthor along with a teleporter to give him access to the whole arsenal. But hey, why not just turn him into a bootleg Iron Man?

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Why did they put a female Ratcatcher in the new SS movie?

If you want another female for diversity sake, why not go with a canonically female villain, instead of gender-swapping some random Z-lister?

 

[Bolo]

Your average normie isn't going to know who Starro is and consoomers like Bob will gush sexual fluids over it regardless.

Robert doesn't "know" who Starro is either. Normies and Robert know Starro from that one episode of Batman Beyond with the justice league, and that is it.

On the comics Starro might show up here and there, but he never had much else going for him, maybe in the legion of Superheroes, but who the fuck reads the fucking Legion?

So I don't buy for a fucking second Robert went "oh my goooooddd!!!" over a character he had to look up at the wikipedia later on, or the second he saw that tentacle, yep! That is starro, just like his 1960 debut against the JLA! that's my boy!!! yeah, uh-hu, totally happened.

I'm not one of those asshole that act as if people need to pass a ridiculous pop culture trivia before enjoying shit, let people like what they like, but I can't stand posers like Robert acting as if they have this investment over this D lister DC villain when in reality we all know that acting as if he is super duper excited for Starro is just another way for him to flex the "I CLAPPED WHEN I SAW THE THING I KNOW" which on Robert's mind, makes him the professional pop-culture commentator and the rest being the rest.

And this kind of attitude isn't exactly new, it is just taking a new shape on these internet age. But the core of the sentiment is "I know more than you", and if ever been in a comics convention in the 90's early 2000's, this was typical scene you would see everywhere:

But really, acting out for fucking Starro? fuck off Robert.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

Lindsay Ellis deleted her Twitter after crossing some Asians by insulting that Raya movie, Robert should reach out to her, give her a shoulder to cry on. They can talk about Starro. And Jarro, their favorite Starro offshoot.