Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Kyria the Great]

This is what Bob's reflection says to him in the mirror every morning. And his brother. And his parents. And his grandma. And his...
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Bob, the only thing you failed at is life. Also, I love how so in denial he is that he assumes they hate Sam Raimi instead of his dickriding for Sam Raimi.
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Well though Darkman is enjoyable, it was admittedly very campy and I feel part of it was intentional. I also will agree while elements of Spiderman 1-3 were good, admittedly they haven't exactly held the test of time where much of it feels like a never ending misery for Peter Parker and his partner who gets kidnapped every time Mary Jane. I simply bring this up to ask, does Bob acknowledge the flaws of the Raimi movies?

 

[Gordon Cole]

Did Trump write this obituary?

Well though Darkman is enjoyable, it was admittedly very campy and I feel part of it was intentional. I also will agree while elements of Spiderman 1-3 were good, admittedly they haven't exactly held the test of time where much of it feels like a never ending misery for Peter Parker and his partner who gets kidnapped every time Mary Jane. I simply bring this up to ask, does Bob acknowledge the flaws of the Raimi movies?

As someone who loves almost everything Sam Raimi ever made, even I can acknowledge some of the flaws in Spider-Man 1 & 2 and still not let liking 1 and loving 2 cloud my judgement of Homecoming like Bob.

 

[Meowthkip]

Well though Darkman is enjoyable, it was admittedly very campy and I feel part of it was intentional. I also will agree while elements of Spiderman 1-3 were good, admittedly they haven't exactly held the test of time where much of it feels like a never ending misery for Peter Parker and his partner who gets kidnapped every time Mary Jane. I simply bring this up to ask, does Bob acknowledge the flaws of the Raimi movies?

Honestly their flaws add some charm. I like the Raimi movies myself, I'm a fan of Raimi's (Evil Dead 2 is one of my favorite movies), and the films helped get me into the comics. But then I realized how many liberties were taken with the character after the fact. Homecoming is the closest to canon Spider-Man we've gotten in terms of personality and story and I liked that Peter Parker was an actual teenager with horrible luck who liked to crack jokes and struggled to balance his being a super hero with his ordinary life. And I liked Michael Keaton's take on The Vulture. I was not expecting to really find myself liking The Vulture, of all Spider-Man villains. It's a good movie and Bob just seems to be stubborn because he doesn't like things that are different.

I mean, if this is just because he's mad that J.K. Simmon's portrayal of J. Jonah Jameson will never be matched and he probably won't show up in the MCU proper, I could understand that. JJJ has been in Spider-Man since the beginning. His absence was why I didn't bother with the Amazing Spider-Man movies. I like that character and I like the dynamic he has with Spider-Man.

Is that it, Bob?

Are you gay for JJJ?

Also I'm mad that this thread is how I'm finding out that June Foray died.

 

[RockVolnutt]

IMO Raimi's Spider-Man doesn't have much in common with Spidey and is more "Generic Superhero-Man". Not to say they're bad, it's the most accurate to the tone of the Lee/Ditko and Romita Sr. comics that made him famous in the first place with how campy they are. It also didn't write the character in the same manner as Poochie like in the TASM films or have Peter go to "Midtown School of Science and Technology" like Homecoming instead of "Midtown High School".

I guess what I'm getting at is none of the three really match the source material with TASM being the worst offender.

Spoiler

Also it's kind of odd that Bob clings to the "Spider-Boy" years like he thinks that's where he peaks. Even his reimaginings are set around high school/college Pete. Maybe a sign of his own arrested development or maybe he doesn't "get" the character is about growth, who knows.

 

[Gordon Cole]

He's angry at you because you say the most disgusting, hateful things day in and day out and still stumble ass-backwards into writing/video gigs.

I don't know why he's angry at Gerry Conway, you got me there.

Also it's kind of odd that Bob clings to the "Spider-Boy" years like he thinks that's where he peaks. Even his reimaginings are set around high school/college Pete. Maybe a sign of his own arrested development or maybe he doesn't "get" the character is about growth, who knows.

If that's the case, would Bob be one of the few people who'd like One More Day?

 

[Viktor]

So, I looked up the definition of term 'brocialist' he likes to use so much, not a big surprise he acts/talks like that definition. But since when these people were doing anything else other than projecting their faults on others?
E: Also, on that note, why he uses parentheses when replying to people? He may think it makes him seem smart, but it makes him look like know-it-all asshole, which he obviously is. He's not anyone else, unless he is projecting even more of his failures on others by being "witty".

 

[AngeloTheWizard]

So, I looked up the definition of term 'brocialist' he likes to use so much, not a big surprise he acts/talks like that definition. But since when these people were doing anything else other than projecting their faults on others?
E: Also, on that note, why he uses parentheses when replying to people? He may think it makes him seem smart, but it makes him look like know-it-all asshole, which he obviously is. He's not anyone else, unless he is projecting even more of his failures on others by being "witty".

I think the parenthesis are supposed to be a "whisper" effect? Like, he's whispering to his followers? Whatever, doesn't work anyway.

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

So, I looked up the definition of term 'brocialist' he likes to use so much, not a big surprise he acts/talks like that definition. But since when these people were doing anything else other than projecting their faults on others?
E: Also, on that note, why he uses parentheses when replying to people? He may think it makes him seem smart, but it makes him look like know-it-all asshole, which he obviously is. He's not anyone else, unless he is projecting even more of his failures on others by being "witty".

I think the parenthesis are supposed to be a "whisper" effect? Like, he's whispering to his followers? Whatever, doesn't work anyway.

I think it's more "I'm mocking people by insinuating they're actually sub human scum that aren't worth my time".

Case in point, Bob is a "movie reviewer".

 

[Bungleboy]

Well though Darkman is enjoyable, it was admittedly very campy and I feel part of it was intentional. I also will agree while elements of Spiderman 1-3 were good, admittedly they haven't exactly held the test of time where much of it feels like a never ending misery for Peter Parker and his partner who gets kidnapped every time Mary Jane. I simply bring this up to ask, does Bob acknowledge the flaws of the Raimi movies?

He doesn't.

 

[Gordon Cole]

I dunno, you want Trump gone so badly that it seems you'd like President Pence.

Will this start the "Breaking & Entering" phase of Bob's life? Stay tuned!

 

[RockVolnutt]

If that's the case, would Bob be one of the few people who'd like One More Day?

Probably. Remember his videos on how he'd implement Spider-Man into the MCU? It was a mix of the Clone Saga and the worst parts of Civil War and Ultimate Marvel's "Death of Spider-Man". He wanted Raimi's Peter to become a brownshirt villain, get killed, and now it's Miles Morales and Ben Reilly as the new Spider-Men. Only way the guy is getting out of school is in a casket and he'd clone him to keep him there.

 

[Asa_Spades60]

Doesn't he ever get tired? Doesn't he feel empty and hollow inside? Is this the best he can hope for in life?

Has he even touched a titty?

To answer your questions: 1) Not until 8 in the morning, 2) All the fat in his body makes it impossible to feel empty and hollow inside, 3) This is the best he can hope for in life because this is all he knows, and 4) The only breasts he'll ever touch will come from a bucket marked "KFC" (or a box marked "Popeyes" if they have Popeyes Chicken in Boston -- oh, maybe a box marked "Boston Market").

 

[Count groudon]

Well though Darkman is enjoyable, it was admittedly very campy and I feel part of it was intentional. I also will agree while elements of Spiderman 1-3 were good, admittedly they haven't exactly held the test of time where much of it feels like a never ending misery for Peter Parker and his partner who gets kidnapped every time Mary Jane. I simply bring this up to ask, does Bob acknowledge the flaws of the Raimi movies?

He has a lot of nostalgia for them, and as we all know remembering something fondly=perfection in Blobert's squinty little eyes. In fact, he's still so caught up in the old Raimi Spider Man movies that it completely clouds his ability to enjoy the newer cinematic takes on the character. While the newest movie wasn't exactly perfect it was a surprisingly solid movie and I gotta give them props on taking The Vulture, arguably one of Spider Man's most bland and generic villains, and made him into a three dimensional character that most people sympathizied and identified with. Bob however didn't really seem to care all to much about it, and even blamed it not being like Raimi movies as one particular reason he had such a stick up his ass about it, and of course condemned their take on the Vulture since he was depicted as a down on his luck working man who used his mechanical knowledge from years of working with machines and a bunch of scraps from the various war machines used in the countless wars fought in the marvel universe to build himself a flight suit to commit crimes to provide for his family, because as we all know all blue collar people are the devil and Bob lost his shit over the fact that his perfect idea of a villain was redeemed at the end instead of having Spider Man punch a hole through the back of his skull to warn all blue collar hicks that the inevitable superior future is on its way and their time is quickly coming to its end.

That's the thing that makes Bob such an insufferable pop culture critic, his tastes are completely corrupted by nostalgia and his inability to put his warped political ideas to the side. He's missed out on so many great games and movies simply because they're modern movies enjoyed by "dudebros" and they don't give him a nostalgia buzz, and on the rare occasion he actually does consume new media he seemingly can't help but look for things that he thinks could help him spread his own ajenda and pretty much bases his opinion on the movie on how much it either helps reinforce his beliefs or reminds him of his "good old days." It's seriously almost sad how he can't really enjoy anything because his mind has such a narrow thought process that he has to obsessively look for validation in everything instead of just being able to sit back and enjoy something with an open mind.

 

[Wesley Willis]

Bob doesn't like brocialism because they supported Bernie. He's a globalist technocrat/authoritarian who is so blinded by his own ideology he doesn't realize he's supporting Republican-lite candidates while blaming the actual left for being more concerned with worker's rights than pronouns and comic tits.

 

[Begemot]

Bob doesn't like brocialism because they supported Bernie. He's a globalist technocrat/authoritarian who is so blinded by his own ideology he doesn't realize he's supporting Republican-lite candidates while blaming the actual left for being more concerned with worker's rights than pronouns and comic tits.

Yeah, he looks like a Rockefeller Republican.

 

[Positron]

As I said, neither of the brothers is normal:

 

[Wesley Willis]

Yeah, he looks like a Rockefeller Republican.

It's this new crazy mutation. Globalist economic policy mixed with fringe cultural Marxism, but hates actual economic social democrats. It's like inverse neoconservatism.

 

[Gordon Cole]

As I said, neither of the brothers is normal:

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You know what, I'll take a guy who lamely shills his Patreon over a guy who wants to bomb all the car factories in the world.

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

As I said, neither of the brothers is normal:

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Well, at least the attention whore doesn't fall far from the tree.

Still, Chris feels less offensive than his "MARIO AND I WILL MAKE A SUPERIOR FUTURE!" brother.

 

[Gordon Cole]

Bad news for any Downie fans of Bob.