Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[saralovesjuicyfruit]

Well I guess that'll show us!

Well I mainly meant, who would think it’s a good idea to roast kiwi in chicken juices? It may be even more insane and gross than the Mountain Dew marinade.

 

[Doctor Placebo]

That scotch comment has me rolling, I missed it. Robert couldn’t tell the difference between a $325 glass of scotch (which would most likely be a shot you sip) and a well liquor/bottom shelf scotch.

The obese slob who cooked this slop doesn’t have a refined palate for expensive liquor or Michelin Star cuisine.

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Robert is the kind of nigga who would buy all kinds of overpriced garbage and think it meant he had refined taste because he spent a lot of money. If he was rich, he'd be a tacky nouveau riche who would be a high class scammer's dream.

He'd be the kind of guy who spends $120,000 for a banana duct taped to a wall.

 

[Judge Dredd]

Well seeing things absolutes is very common for intellectually lazy people who think they're the only ones to have figured everything out. Does this mean Cinephile Robespierre considers Rorschach from Watchmen his personal hero? Because he kinda seems to hold the same blinkered world-view.

No. Because Bob hates anything that is popular with people he doesn't like.

 

[Karellen]

Interestingly enough the top page for Mountain Dew chicken is from the Boy Scouts

Mountain Dew Chicken Recipe

Mountain Dew Chicken Recipe for Boy Scouts

boyscouttrail.com

This Recipe is meant for Boy Scouts.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

Hey now. Uncle Ruckus has his faults but he's actually skilled in a lot of different areas instead of just bragging about. In fact, he rarely ever brags about himself.

All those different jobs he's always working also shows that he has hustle.

It's why sjws hate being reminded of that show. Ruckus reminds them they have no work ethic.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Jesus, Robert has been retweeting some sperging from political lolcows.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Jesus, Robert has been retweeting some sperging from political lolcows.
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I like how Bob is still doubling down on people from red states being "orcs" and then retweeting something contrary to him saying "DRUMPF SHOULD ADDRESS A HALF-EMPTY" room from a politician who is clearly trying to save face when people question her attending despite another member of "The Squad" not being there.

 

[Koby_Fish]

Well I mainly meant, who would think it’s a good idea to roast kiwi in chicken juices? It may be even more insane and gross than the Mountain Dew marinade.

well aside the "LOL Kiwi farms" reference, kiwifruit actually has meat tenderizers in it, along the lines of papaya or pineapple. So, if seasoned correctly, it *should* work.

A pity Bob forgot to turn the chicken over to breast side up halfway through cooking time :/

 

[Neko GF]

Jesus, Robert has been retweeting some sperging from political lolcows.
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AOC: "I will not attend Drumpf's SOU!! It legitimizes him!!!"
Omar: "I will attend Drumpf's SOU in order to resist him!!"

Robert decides to RT two messages that contradict each other solely because they come from his political waifus.

 

[Adamska]

That scotch comment has me rolling, I missed it. Robert couldn’t tell the difference between a $325 glass of scotch (which would most likely be a shot you sip) and a well liquor/bottom shelf scotch.

The obese slob who cooked this slop doesn’t have a refined palate for expensive liquor or Michelin Star cuisine.

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Oh dear fuck that mac and cheese made me want to die.

Dried chicken skin and meat? Are you fucking serious with this Bobby? You do this and marinate in soda and STILL think you're part of the elite thinkers?

The fuck. His food failures are worse than Jack Scalfani's at this point.

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Bob's genius comedy rearing it's head again.

Spoiler: totes a joke. Believe it!

Bob Chipman on Twitter: "Hm. I'm startin' to ...like(?) these creepy …

archived 4 Feb 2020 22:10:10 UTC

archive.is

My pants are undone in anticipation of the fallout this absolute shit storm Iowa Caucus has become. How badly will you flip flop your stances Robert? Or how stupidly will you hold your ground regardless of what comes to light? *insert Linkara_hmmmmmmmm.wav*

well aside the "LOL Kiwi farms" reference, kiwifruit actually has meat tenderizers in it, along the lines of papaya or pineapple. So, if seasoned correctly, it *should* work.

A pity Bob forgot to turn the chicken over to breast side up halfway through cooking time :/

Burnt back fat and soggy, undercooked breast meat is the superior way to enjoy Enlightened chicken.

 

[Koby_Fish]

Oh dear fuck that mac and cheese made me want to die.

Dried chicken skin and meat? Are you fucking serious with this Bobby? You do this and marinate in soda and STILL think you're part of the elite thinkers?

The fuck. His food failures are worse than Jack Scalfani's at this point.

Inquiring minds want to know: Did blob fry the chicken himself, or is it the crispy battered skin off of KFC?

 

[Doctor Placebo]

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The second amendment was designed with literally anything the military could be equipped with in mind. Military has cannons? Civilians can have cannons. Military can have puckle guns (the 18th century equivalent of a gatling gun)? So can civilians. It was pretty clear at the time and far from supporting more gun restrictions, it points towards us being allowed to buy full auto guns and bazookas.

Setting that aside, I would love for one of these big brained individuals to explain how a many times larger nation where votes are more difficult to count and it's much easier to commit voter fraud is less suited for the electoral college than the smaller, cozier 13 colonies. Never mind that they were states, not colonies when the electoral college was a thing, you properly evolved retards.

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Oh dear fuck that mac and cheese made me want to die.

Dried chicken skin and meat? Are you fucking serious with this Bobby? You do this and marinate in soda and STILL think you're part of the elite thinkers?

The fuck. His food failures are worse than Jack Scalfani's at this point.

Let us not forget @Quixotic Man's find of duct tape and blood.

Bob Chipman on Twitter: "Tasty cookin' isnt always pretty cookin' - t…

archived 4 Feb 2020 22:27:21 UTC

archive.is

Double-vaccuum sealed Gets me everytime.


EDIT:

Bob's latest culinary masterpiece.
4 different kinds of hot sauce (sriracha is a hot sauce, Bob), taco seasoning, and cooked with stuffing with even more seasoning, and marinated until decomposing.
Besides the fact that it doesn't actually appeared to be vacuum sealed, Bob entirely missed the point of vacuum sealing with a marinade, in that the lack of air means you can use LESS liquid since the lack of air pockets makes for a more even distribution.
Since he didn't post a results picture, I am guessing this came out even worse than Mt Dew Chicken.

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[Neko GF]

FilmRobert vs Amberlyn cook off when?

 

[Koby_Fish]

Let us not forget @Quixotic Man's find of duct tape and blood.

https://archive.li/eXv3z

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Double-vaccuum sealed Gets me everytime.

Oh yes, the much-vaunted "Fire in (butt)Hole Chicken". Is that fucking DUCT TAPE LOL?

 

[Mola Ram]

Lost in the shuffle of Bob's latest angry sperg-sneer (yes, I know, there's so much it's tough to find anything to focus on) is his comment on how bad the "Heartland orcs" smell. Apart from having some very long and very nasty racial and antisemitic implications, can we just take a moment and meditate on the likely hypocrisy of this? I mean ... does Bob smell like the very flowers of Paradise? Anyone?

At best he probably smells like a mix of spoiled pork and Axe body wash.

 

[Mr._Blonde]

That scotch comment has me rolling, I missed it. Robert couldn’t tell the difference between a $325 glass of scotch (which would most likely be a shot you sip) and a well liquor/bottom shelf scotch.

The obese slob who cooked this slop doesn’t have a refined palate for expensive liquor or Michelin Star cuisine.

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He actually marinated his chicken in Mountain Dew? ACTUALLY marinated in Mountain Dew?! I knew about the other three abominations, but...he roasted a chicken in Mountain Dew? This shit that only Neckbeards can come up with! And put Kiwi in it? I think I need to punch a wall right now until everything makes sense.

And what's up with him and Mountain Dew?!

 

[Assorted Nuts]

And what's up with him and Mountain Dew?!

Bob is the exact variety of white trash he hates. It was always projection.

 

[Neko GF]

He actually marinated his chicken in Mountain Dew? ACTUALLY marinated in Mountain Dew?! I knew about the other three abominations, but...he roasted a chicken in Mountain Dew? This shit that only Neckbeards can come up with! And put Kiwi in it? I think I need to punch a wall right now until everything makes sense.

And what's up with him and Mountain Dew?!

According to Robert it's an extremely popular recipe from the Southern wastelands. The way he gets so defensive and assmad when someone brings it up, is so funny.

Spoiler: Cultural appropriation

https://twitter.com/the_moviebob/status/1223243666053050369 (Archive)
https://twitter.com/the_moviebob/status/1196026575101341696 (Archive)
https://twitter.com/the_moviebob/status/1189647955315302402 (Archive)