Sperg about comic books here

  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
IIf Superman has a machine to turn people black, why doesn't he use it to turn everybody into a mono-race and end the idea of race so we can get to what really matters- a world where left-handed people ruled the world.

Also if Superman can change your race, does he have a gay ray that he uses to turn people into fags?
Cause Pa Kent’s wisdom still overrides Jor-El’s “muh science” and he’s fine with say, John Henry being Steel and being his bro……. but he’s never gonna lead the League or be on the pedestal of Superman. It’s the same reason when Wally invites Clark to League DnD, Pa Kent’s wisdom kicks in and suddenly Clark is ten years old asking to go play DnD with Lex

“IT’S DEMONIC CLARK, NO SON OF MINE NO MATTER HOW STRONG IS SUMMONING HELLSPAWN.”

He just awkwardly tells Wally no and flies away.

Clark undoubtedly has a gay gun, he just hasn’t figured out how to make a straight gun, it’s his new version of Kandor, a problem he can’t solve. The gay gun was made when Bruce made a crack at Jon and Clark laughed it off but seethed for months and shot Tim with it. You know Silver Age Supes would do that.
Maybe Supes uses CWC's straight blood to fuel it.
The idea of Clark keeping Chris in one of the Fortress’s cells just to collect blood is honestly the best ending for the little guy.
 
Cause Pa Kent’s wisdom still overrides Jor-El’s “muh science” and he’s fine with say, John Henry being Steel and being his bro……. but he’s never gonna lead the League or be on the pedestal of Superman. It’s the same reason when Wally invites Clark to League DnD, Pa Kent’s wisdom kicks in and suddenly Clark is ten years old asking to go play DnD with Lex

“IT’S DEMONIC CLARK, NO SON OF MINE NO MATTER HOW STRONG IS SUMMONING HELLSPAWN.”

He just awkwardly tells Wally no and flies away.
Afterwards, a series of very funny chats occur with Zatanna, Dr. Fate, Zauriel, Constantine, and Shazam about the chances of DnD actually causing something like that.

Zee is a pal and says "unlikely". Fate turns full creepy Nabu stare and just says "no. . ."

Zauriel asks what's a DnD and then laughs.

Constantine messes with Supes, but then admits that the chances aren't zero, but unlikely.

The Wizard Shazam is about to say "yes" but Captain Marvel's wisdom of solomon says "unlikely"

Spectre looks at him and gives a definitive answer that the readers never see.

Pa Kent probably approves of Steel after they talk about tools for 6 hours. I can just see both of them just sitting in that fucking barn while Steel admires a set of century old tools. Pa Kent accidentally slips up with "boy" and Steel just laughs and says the family of the greatest hero on Earth can call him a nigger any day. .
Clark undoubtedly has a gay gun, he just hasn’t figured out how to make a straight gun, it’s his new version of Kandor, a problem he can’t solve. The gay gun was made when Bruce made a crack at Jon and Clark laughed it off but seethed for months and shot Tim with it. You know Silver Age Supes would do that.

The idea of Clark keeping Chris in one of the Fortress’s cells just to collect blood is honestly the best ending for the little guy.
He keeps Batman in line by threatening to use it on the Joker.

Tim got clipped by it after a party in the Fortress of Solitude gone wrong. Bruce has been trying to find a cure. There's emails in the superhero circle about finding the "cure" for the "gay" and it's not what people think it is. Amanda Waller finds out and uses it to blackmail the superheroes.
 
“Batman, you and I have had our games over the years but for once just be honest. Does Superman have a weapon that can forcibly induce homosexuality?”

“No such weapon exists, Superman doesn’t have time to waste on such ridiculous ideas.”

(Clark in his workshop refining more CWC blood while humming a tune)
CWCville is really just a tiny locked off section of Kandor
See now, I’m picturing it as one of Brainiac’s jars and sockethead being the ultimate alog.

“CWCville of the Branchland system, all it’s knowledge, now mine, my place in Christory assured.”
 
“Batman, you and I have had our games over the years but for once just be honest. Does Superman have a weapon that can forcibly induce homosexuality?”

“No such weapon exists, Superman doesn’t have time to waste on such ridiculous ideas.”

(Clark in his workshop refining more CWC blood while humming a tune)

See now, I’m picturing it as one of Brainiac’s jars and sockethead being the ultimate alog.

“CWCville of the Branchland system, all it’s knowledge, now mine, my place in Christory assured.”
Lex Luthor sweats as he's forced into a closed room with Bueno Excellente and he hears Batman simply state "we're going to use this on you unless you give us the secret recipe to coca cola"

wasn't there a pink kyptonite that made Superman gay?
 
Lex Luthor sweats as he's forced into a closed room with Bueno Excellente and he hears Batman simply state "we're going to use this on you unless you give us the secret recipe to coca cola"

wasn't there a pink kyptonite that made Superman gay?
Yes to the pink kryptonite, that’s what makes this even funnier
 
Yes to the pink kryptonite, that’s what makes this even funnier
"Hah Kal-El, you may have reflected my de-aging ray at me, but with this Pink kryptonite, I still win! Wait, why are you looking at me like that? Drooling? Oh no this is like the time I was at one of Epstein's parties, but some kind of twisted nightmare."

"You're mature for your age, Lexi-poo."

Consequently, Batman's recording all this via hacking a CCTV and is puking in his mouth.
 
"Hah Kal-El, you may have reflected my de-aging ray at me, but with this Pink kryptonite, I still win! Wait, why are you looking at me like that? Drooling? Oh no this is like the time I was at one of Epstein's parties, but some kind of twisted nightmare."

"You're mature for your age, Lexi-poo."

Consequently, Batman's recording all this via hacking a CCTV and is puking in his mouth.
“We don’t talk about the pink one.”

Clark Kent going nuclear and being the one who penned a scathing coverage on the Epstein list is something I could’ve seen an “Ultimate DC” doing.
 
“We don’t talk about the pink one.”

Clark Kent going nuclear and being the one who penned a scathing coverage on the Epstein list is something I could’ve seen an “Ultimate DC” doing.
Bruce trying to explain that he was like 4 years old when his name was written on the Epstein logs as he asks Clark to not drag him into all this.
 
Bruce trying to explain that he was like 4 years old when his name was written on the Epstein logs as he asks Clark to not drag him into all this.
“Hey Smallville, I’m hungry, wanna grab some food?”

“I can’t Lois, I’m sitting on the story of the century, so much is riding on this.”

“What? Did you figure out who killed Epstein?”

(Glare)

“Oh god you figured out who did it.”

(Clark reveals a picture of Slade Wilson next to Hillary Clinton)

“This is huge, Lois I don’t know who to trust. I KNOW PEOPLE ON THIS LIST!”

“Oh I’m sorry Bruce isn’t who you thought he was.”

“What?! No, why would you assume he’s on the list?”
 
“Hey Smallville, I’m hungry, wanna grab some food?”

“I can’t Lois, I’m sitting on the story of the century, so much is riding on this.”

“What? Did you figure out who killed Epstein?”

(Glare)

“Oh god you figured out who did it.”

(Clark reveals a picture of Slade Wilson next to Hillary Clinton)

“This is huge, Lois I don’t know who to trust. I KNOW PEOPLE ON THIS LIST!”

“Oh I’m sorry Bruce isn’t who you thought he was.”

“What?! No, why would you assume he’s on the list?”
I feel like Epstein would have been killed by SLIPKNOT.

or Deadshot. In this universe, the Suicide Squad coincidentally had a mission in the area.

Oliver Queen sweats as he tries to divert the topic before admitting that he got brought there as a boy too.

Consequently Clark and Bruce have a very uncomfy talk as Bruce explains that the "wards" were not trafficked from Epstein and they can go check it out with any time traveller.
 
I'm going to bitch about why I hate Poison Ivy and Harley as a 'loving' couple. I'm prefectly fine with Harley being bi and wanting to be more then friends with Ivy. What I've never really bought is the idea that Poison Ivy would actually be romanticly interested in Harley. Ivy and Harley's relationship should be just as abusive to Harley as hers with the Joker is in a different way.

Ivy is at her core a femme fatale and should not remotely be somebody truly capable of being in an actual loving relationship with anyone.
I've said this earlier in the thread, but the issue with Harley is that so many people grew up loving her and are insistent she get a happy ending. Since that can't happen with the Joker, Ivy is the next best option, but as you said Ivy is not the type to be a loving person, so she needs to get a redemption arc too. Part of it is feminism insisting women can never be evil because they aren't human beings, but it's mostly about giving Harley her happily ever after, and dudes something to jack it to.

The problem with that is that part of Ivy's character is she sees plants as people, and humans as nothing. Much like we wouldn't care if a plant got stepped on, she wouldn't care if a human got shot, regardless of who it was. So, her being good to Harley makes no sense. If she was in the desert with enough water to keep a plant or Harley alive by the time they reach safety, Harley's dying of dehydration because to Ivy, the plant has more value. And after she would gladly use Harley's corpse as plant food, then feel absolutely no remorse when Batman dragged her to Arkham for it.
 
I feel like they make Harley an anti-hero when they redeem her when she should be a failed hero if they attempt to redeem her. You can go with Stockholm syndrome with her and the Joker, but you could actually make her believe that most villains in Gotham are sick people. Her joining the Joker was a total failure of ethics, but was an honest attempt at trying to study him for a treatment.

Basically her whole issue with Batman is her being an unironic bleeding heart who believes in the therapeutic theory of Justice vs Batman being on his face more retribution based Justice while believing people like Dent do need treatment until they cross a certain line.

She doesn’t work as an anti-hero. She’d be better as the person who stops being a villain and looks back in utter embarrassment at one bad choice. She doesn’t pretend she’s like Patty Hearst (Hearst got starved, beaten, and raped until she started repeating Black Nationalist talking points).
She’d be better as someone working again at Arkham who is a weird ally of Batman like Bullock. Could even do something with Hugo Strange and her.
 
Tom King developing a little girl "Trinity" series for DC Comics. They keep doubling down on things nobody wanted nor asked for.
Trinity.jpeg
 
I know this isn't related to the convo but while I was fucking around with my watched threads I somehow hid this one and I have to enable show me anyway to see any new updates. How do I fix?
 
I feel like they make Harley an anti-hero when they redeem her when she should be a failed hero if they attempt to redeem her. You can go with Stockholm syndrome with her and the Joker, but you could actually make her believe that most villains in Gotham are sick people. Her joining the Joker was a total failure of ethics, but was an honest attempt at trying to study him for a treatment.

Basically her whole issue with Batman is her being an unironic bleeding heart who believes in the therapeutic theory of Justice vs Batman being on his face more retribution based Justice while believing people like Dent do need treatment until they cross a certain line.

She doesn’t work as an anti-hero. She’d be better as the person who stops being a villain and looks back in utter embarrassment at one bad choice. She doesn’t pretend she’s like Patty Hearst (Hearst got starved, beaten, and raped until she started repeating Black Nationalist talking points).
She’d be better as someone working again at Arkham who is a weird ally of Batman like Bullock. Could even do something with Hugo Strange and her.
I feel like this could be a fun route. What if she, for instance, tries to team up with the Doom Patrol or the Creeper?
Tom King developing a little girl "Trinity" series for DC Comics. They keep doubling down on things nobody wanted nor asked for. View attachment 6307989
This is so weird because it feels so fake, but I wonder if that's because it feels too condensed.

Maybe, just maybe, it could work a decade ago.
The one thing I liked about the White Knight universe was the idea of a Bruce/Harley romance, I think that if done well could be a really compelling story.
I thought it was intriguing. I think it'd be a fine route to try with the current-ish "breaking Bruce" angle. Have Amanda Waller try to force Harley into being a kind of honeypot to control a mentally unstable Bruce, only for it to go in the direction she doesn't want.
 
I thought it was intriguing. I think it'd be a fine route to try with the current-ish "breaking Bruce" angle. Have Amanda Waller try to force Harley into being a kind of honeypot to control a mentally unstable Bruce, only for it to go in the direction she doesn't want.
Yeah, I think the weird thing about Batman is that he really doesn't have a definitive/core love interest. Some might say its Catwoman but I've always gotten the sense that it isn't as concret a pairing as Clark and Lois or Peter/MJ
 
Yeah, I think the weird thing about Batman is that he really doesn't have a definitive/core love interest. Some might say its Catwoman but I've always gotten the sense that it isn't as concret a pairing as Clark and Lois or Peter/MJ
it's been a pairing for a long while but the issue is that Batman's character has been thrown into weird positions too often. Like the '70s when they decided he wanted to be a grumpy loner and had him leave the JLA and etc. I get it but the shift from Silver Age wholesome Batman to grumpy and brooding was a bit jarring.
 
Back
Top Bottom