Culture The Hottest Thing a Man Can Do Is Not Be a Dick About Astrology - Hating astrology is a typical straight-guy schtick, but it may be hurting your dating life


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Straight men, the internet has a question for you: Why do you hate astrology so much?

Hannah Ewers was among the first to pose the query in a 2018 Vice article, followed by Leah Thomas writing for Cosmopolitan the next year. The answers they found, based on interviews with real, red-blooded, astrology-hating straight men, are more or less what you might expect, because they’re probably ones you yourself have given: It’s “not real,” it’s girl stuff, or, as one particularly charming 20-something told Ewers, “If you try to bring up that shit with me, I’ll think you’re a mindless bimbo.”

In other words, men feel entitled to belittle and denigrate astrology for the same reason they feel entitled to belittle and denigrate anything else society has coded as “feminine” or otherwise related to women: because the very thread that holds a patriarchal society together is the fundamental — if now largely unspoken — belief that womanhood itself is inherently bad. Thus, anything of or related to women must, by extension, be foolish, frivolous, stupid or simply evil.

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This attitude has inevitably colored modern man’s response to astrology, despite the fact that the gendering of astrology as categorically “feminine” is a relatively recent development in the practice’s two millennia or so of existence. As former straight male astrology skeptic turned straight male astrologer Samuel F. Reynolds noted in a response to Ewer’s piece, women did not enter the field of astrology in any formal way until the 20th century. Even today, he tells InsideHook, leadership in the field remains largely, if surprisingly, male.

“The people who lead in astrology, who write the books, who are the headliners at conferences, they’re still men,” says Reynolds, explaining that the modern gendering of astrology that relegates the practice strictly to the domain of women is, quite simply, “BS.”

That said, I am not particularly interested in investigating why straight men hate astrology — as you may have noticed, I think I have a pretty good idea already — nor am I interested in trying to change your mind. What I am interested in doing, however, is explaining why it might be in your best interest to, at the very least, stop being a dick about it.

Hating astrology is a turnoff

As society increasingly begins to reckon with the forces of toxic masculinity and the adverse effects it has on people of all genders — including straight, cis men — those who openly deride astrology are beginning to find themselves among a class of “alpha-male” types often characterized by less-than-progressive views and a commitment to dated, arguably unsavory notions of hypermasculinity.

As recent reports on the rise of “wokefishing” — in which online daters boast more progressive views than they actually hold — suggests, even those who proudly position themselves toward the right of the political spectrum know that their views might not be helping their dating lives. And while dissing astrology may be a less egregious offense — more akin to expressing antipathy for veganism than, say, raging against a specific minority community — it can still come off as a red flag.

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“It just feels very closed-minded to me when a guy is immediately very dismissive of astrology, even when he plays it off as a ‘joke,’” says Emma, a 25-year-old who considers herself a moderate astrology fan.

For what it’s worth, however, Reynolds is willing to cut astrology haters a little slack if they’ve been burned by astrological malpractice at the hands of amateur enthusiasts.

“I think it’s also important for women to own some things themselves, right? There’s been some abuse of astrology, especially in this popular moment,” he says, citing the possibility that some men may be turned off by the idea because they’ve been spurned by a would-be lover who rejected them on the basis of astrological incompatibility.

In my own experience, however, this particular trauma does not seem to be the case among the vast majority of men who have allied with the war on astrology.

“He doesn’t have to give me his whole birth chart or anything. I’m not grilling him to see if we’re really ‘compatible,’” says Emma. “But when he won’t even entertain it in good fun it just comes off as stubborn and retrograde.” Pun intended, presumably.

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Meanwhile, if astro-intolerance is a red flag, then an affinity or even just a polite acknowledgement of astrology from a man seems to signal the opposite for many prospective partners.

“I think if a guy can acknowledge or appreciate it, it says more about who he is as a person,” says Lena, a 22-year-old who, despite only having a casual interest in astrology herself, sees a man’s response to the subject as potentially reflective of his views on other, more pressing social issues.

“It’s kind of similar to guys who can acknowledge that women still experience sexism,” she continues. “I don’t need a guy to get worked up about it, but when he knows it happens to us, it’s comforting, because at least then I know he is aware of other people besides himself. I feel like acknowledging astrology is similar.”

A tale as old as toxic masculinity

While the leap from astrology to sexism may seem questionable, Reynolds actually sees modern male antipathy for astrology as deeply rooted in patriarchal structures, suggesting a more insidious mindset may underlie casual astro-shaming as well as much darker manifestations of toxic masculinity today.

This link between astrology hating and misogyny is apparent in more overt ways, specifically the mere act of men belittling a woman’s interest in something in the first place. As Reynolds wrote in his response to Ewers’s Vice article, “If he belittles you because you’re into astrology, fuck him. (And I don’t mean literally.) You don’t need to look up his Mercury sign to know he’s a jerk.”

But according to Reynolds, there’s more to it than the obvious red flag of a guy being rude to a woman.

“There’s something that I think is deep in the male psyche that we need to talk about,” he tells InsideHook. “Men associate who they are, as men in relationships, with how they shape and define the other person’s personhood. Their sense of identity is that fragile, and that has really powerful implications — not just in terms of how he’s dealing with you in a particular conversation on the first date about astrology, but in more bizarre and horrendous ways, like why are there more men who do murder-suicides?”

Obviously, not all men who hate astrology are killers, but Reynolds’ argument seeks to highlight the insidious through line that unites seemingly casual displays of sexism and machismo to their horrific extremes — and it doesn’t just begin with the modern masculinity crisis as we know it today.

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Cope harder, tarotcels. :story:
 
This lady sounds like a real bitch, I bet she's a Scorpio.

On a serious note, I find the whole article odd, and question if this isn't some genius troll. If real, why do they act like only guys think Astrology is BS? In my experience, most people (be it man or woman) think it's a load of crap. It can be "fun" to read, much in the same way it's fun to read a fortune cookie, but I only know 1 or 2 people that see it as anything more than something you read to kill time.
 
You don't go balls-deep with the whole truth right off the bat. You gotta entice her and warm up the girl to the idea first.
Bring up The Dolphin House and the sex psychology experiments performed on them that drove one dolphin to suicide itself.

There's a bunch of real life dark shit surrounding Ecco the Dolphin, and people wonder why we never got a sequel.
 
Any guy that entertains astrology, even if it's just to pick up women, is beta.
A simp, you mean.

If you're only being nice
'Cause you wanna lay the pipe
You're a simp
You're a simp
You're a simp
When you pay for all her clothes
And then she says 'thank you bro'
You're a simp
You're a simp
You're a simp
 
Maybe me and a bunch of other men aren't interested in a partner that wastes their time buying new age garbage. I mean if you're just looking for quick pussy then yes feign interest in whatever bullshit they're hocking but I would never want a serious relationship much less a spouse who took such trash seriously.

In college I had a babe who loved history, guns, and engineering. It was awesome talking to her. More women like her exist than one would think. This concept that we live in a pseudo egalitarian society yet should continue treating women like toddlers is retarded.
 
All-consuming interests in tedious, overly-detailed, irrelevant bullshit are unattractive in anyone. I'm sorry that Tumblr told you autism is cool now, Astrology freaks, but it's fucking not, and it's not misogyny to hate listening to someone babble for hours about bullshit. I avoid people into wargaming for exactly the same reason I avoid people into astrology, and wargaming is nearly all dudes.
 
Interest in astrology is a red flag. If you're gullible enough to fall for that, you'll probably empty my bank account to some Nigerian Prince scam.
Honestly I don't really care if someone is, as long as they aren't actually making life decisions or acting on it, I consider it kinda dumb fun, like magic tricks. Kinda like fortune cookies, you know it's bullshit but you still wanna open one and see what you get and try to be like OH that's totally me!

It's all based on generalizations of course but it's just kinda silly to see what people say about it. It's kind of like people who are really into Meyers Briggs personality tests.
 
If astrology is real, then this shouldn't be a "trauma" or legitimate reason to be "turned off" by astrology, rather, these men should be thankful! The fact that accomodations are being made here shows that even the author doesn't believe.

This nigga dodged a bullet. Are zellenial females really looking for soyboys?
Short answer yes.


What's stupid is guys already pretend to believe in astrology to get some poon. That's like poon getting 101.
 
So in the second to last paragraph they jump from thinking astrology is BS is makes you a jerk... and also more likely to commit murder suicides? That's... quite a leap. Quite a leap.

Really though most women dont care or just think it's a bit of fun. Either that or they use it to justify bad choices. "It wasnt me being an unreasonable bitch that killed my relationship, it's because I'm a libra and he was an Aries! It just wasnt meant to be!"

Honestly though if planets and a nebulous concept of fate controls everyone and provides balance in all things... why didnt it just make these women lesbians? That really seems to be the underlying issue I see here.
 
I have some interest in it, but I would NEVER shell out $$$ for it. In my experience, there are three types of people into Astrology:

1. Those that treat it as a hobby. They don't truly take it to heart and It doesn't affect the trajectory of their lives in any way.

2. Those who are stupid enough to pay an exorbitant amount of money for tarot card readings from scam artists online and buy thousands of dollars worth of magical stones, decks of cards, potions, and claim to be "star seeds" and come from the 9th dimension etc... Their homes are full to the brim with overpriced Etsy knick-knacks and they're covered from head to toe in zodiac tattoos.

3.Those that take advantage of desperate people online and scam them for their money $$$. (Wherever there are desperate people in need of hope, the scam artist will be there.)

If you meet a #1: just nod and say, "Oh? That's nice, dear."
If you meet a #2: Run. Because your bank account will suffer.
If you meet a #3: It may be a wise investment. $$$
 
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