Culture The Hottest Thing a Man Can Do Is Not Be a Dick About Astrology - Hating astrology is a typical straight-guy schtick, but it may be hurting your dating life


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Straight men, the internet has a question for you: Why do you hate astrology so much?

Hannah Ewers was among the first to pose the query in a 2018 Vice article, followed by Leah Thomas writing for Cosmopolitan the next year. The answers they found, based on interviews with real, red-blooded, astrology-hating straight men, are more or less what you might expect, because they’re probably ones you yourself have given: It’s “not real,” it’s girl stuff, or, as one particularly charming 20-something told Ewers, “If you try to bring up that shit with me, I’ll think you’re a mindless bimbo.”

In other words, men feel entitled to belittle and denigrate astrology for the same reason they feel entitled to belittle and denigrate anything else society has coded as “feminine” or otherwise related to women: because the very thread that holds a patriarchal society together is the fundamental — if now largely unspoken — belief that womanhood itself is inherently bad. Thus, anything of or related to women must, by extension, be foolish, frivolous, stupid or simply evil.

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This attitude has inevitably colored modern man’s response to astrology, despite the fact that the gendering of astrology as categorically “feminine” is a relatively recent development in the practice’s two millennia or so of existence. As former straight male astrology skeptic turned straight male astrologer Samuel F. Reynolds noted in a response to Ewer’s piece, women did not enter the field of astrology in any formal way until the 20th century. Even today, he tells InsideHook, leadership in the field remains largely, if surprisingly, male.

“The people who lead in astrology, who write the books, who are the headliners at conferences, they’re still men,” says Reynolds, explaining that the modern gendering of astrology that relegates the practice strictly to the domain of women is, quite simply, “BS.”

That said, I am not particularly interested in investigating why straight men hate astrology — as you may have noticed, I think I have a pretty good idea already — nor am I interested in trying to change your mind. What I am interested in doing, however, is explaining why it might be in your best interest to, at the very least, stop being a dick about it.

Hating astrology is a turnoff

As society increasingly begins to reckon with the forces of toxic masculinity and the adverse effects it has on people of all genders — including straight, cis men — those who openly deride astrology are beginning to find themselves among a class of “alpha-male” types often characterized by less-than-progressive views and a commitment to dated, arguably unsavory notions of hypermasculinity.

As recent reports on the rise of “wokefishing” — in which online daters boast more progressive views than they actually hold — suggests, even those who proudly position themselves toward the right of the political spectrum know that their views might not be helping their dating lives. And while dissing astrology may be a less egregious offense — more akin to expressing antipathy for veganism than, say, raging against a specific minority community — it can still come off as a red flag.

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“It just feels very closed-minded to me when a guy is immediately very dismissive of astrology, even when he plays it off as a ‘joke,’” says Emma, a 25-year-old who considers herself a moderate astrology fan.

For what it’s worth, however, Reynolds is willing to cut astrology haters a little slack if they’ve been burned by astrological malpractice at the hands of amateur enthusiasts.

“I think it’s also important for women to own some things themselves, right? There’s been some abuse of astrology, especially in this popular moment,” he says, citing the possibility that some men may be turned off by the idea because they’ve been spurned by a would-be lover who rejected them on the basis of astrological incompatibility.

In my own experience, however, this particular trauma does not seem to be the case among the vast majority of men who have allied with the war on astrology.

“He doesn’t have to give me his whole birth chart or anything. I’m not grilling him to see if we’re really ‘compatible,’” says Emma. “But when he won’t even entertain it in good fun it just comes off as stubborn and retrograde.” Pun intended, presumably.

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Meanwhile, if astro-intolerance is a red flag, then an affinity or even just a polite acknowledgement of astrology from a man seems to signal the opposite for many prospective partners.

“I think if a guy can acknowledge or appreciate it, it says more about who he is as a person,” says Lena, a 22-year-old who, despite only having a casual interest in astrology herself, sees a man’s response to the subject as potentially reflective of his views on other, more pressing social issues.

“It’s kind of similar to guys who can acknowledge that women still experience sexism,” she continues. “I don’t need a guy to get worked up about it, but when he knows it happens to us, it’s comforting, because at least then I know he is aware of other people besides himself. I feel like acknowledging astrology is similar.”

A tale as old as toxic masculinity

While the leap from astrology to sexism may seem questionable, Reynolds actually sees modern male antipathy for astrology as deeply rooted in patriarchal structures, suggesting a more insidious mindset may underlie casual astro-shaming as well as much darker manifestations of toxic masculinity today.

This link between astrology hating and misogyny is apparent in more overt ways, specifically the mere act of men belittling a woman’s interest in something in the first place. As Reynolds wrote in his response to Ewers’s Vice article, “If he belittles you because you’re into astrology, fuck him. (And I don’t mean literally.) You don’t need to look up his Mercury sign to know he’s a jerk.”

But according to Reynolds, there’s more to it than the obvious red flag of a guy being rude to a woman.

“There’s something that I think is deep in the male psyche that we need to talk about,” he tells InsideHook. “Men associate who they are, as men in relationships, with how they shape and define the other person’s personhood. Their sense of identity is that fragile, and that has really powerful implications — not just in terms of how he’s dealing with you in a particular conversation on the first date about astrology, but in more bizarre and horrendous ways, like why are there more men who do murder-suicides?”

Obviously, not all men who hate astrology are killers, but Reynolds’ argument seeks to highlight the insidious through line that unites seemingly casual displays of sexism and machismo to their horrific extremes — and it doesn’t just begin with the modern masculinity crisis as we know it today.

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Cope harder, tarotcels. :story:
 
The author probably rolled out of bed, read their favorite shitty blog, and read their horoscope which read "You will write something completely inane and retarded, shaming others for not being as easily manipulated as yourself."
That's way too specific for a horoscope.

I pissed an ex off really bad because I "screwed up" a psychic reading because I fucked with the psychic.
Oh, crap, I thought you wrote that you "fucked the psychic".
 
Astrology I believe got its start from some court historian bullshiting the royals for job security.

In other words it does work but not way you think it does. Think trying dumb down how computers work to your pointy haired boss that blue smoke is the fairy dust needed keep the server running and heres what you do to prevent it from escaping. Same deal.
 
Here's something I've always wanted to ask these loons. In the far future when humanity has colonised other star systems will your mumbo jumbo still work? They'll be different planets moving through the constellations, hell if we go out far enough they'll even be different constellations. You'll have to throw all your star charts in the bin and start again, won't you?
 
Thank God I don't have to date anymore. Every old man thinks, I'd like to chase some young tail. If this is how the 25 year old set thinks then they may have found the antidote for being pestered by guys in their 50s. Congratulations, ladies.
 
Really into astrology. Wooden "LIVE LAUGH LOVE" sign hanging in the living room. Copy of Milk and Honey sitting on the coffee table. <- Warning signs you're about to go into a black hole of crazy shit. Add in non-STEM or otherwise worthless degree + heavy twitter/fb/social media use and Y O U ' R E F U C K E D.

I mean all these articles that come out about what men SHOULD be doing to attract women are really helpful in that you can more or less do the exact opposite and end up with the ideal people in your life, relationship or otherwise.
 
Here's something I've always wanted to ask these loons. In the far future when humanity has colonised other star systems will your mumbo jumbo still work? They'll be different planets moving through the constellations, hell if we go out far enough they'll even be different constellations. You'll have to throw all your star charts in the bin and start again, won't you?
idk ask her
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Y'know, we don't even have to wait that long, Musks colony on Mars would do it. "I see the Earth is moving retrograde through Scorpio. Uh... What does that mean?"
 
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I see nothing wrong with being interested in astrology as long as you don't actually think it's real. Like, if a date wanted to do a tarot reading for fun, I'd actually think it'd be kind of cool. I wouldn't think they were a kook unless they show a sincere belief in the results.
 
Here's something I've always wanted to ask these loons. In the far future when humanity has colonised other star systems will your mumbo jumbo still work? They'll be different planets moving through the constellations, hell if we go out far enough they'll even be different constellations. You'll have to throw all your star charts in the bin and start again, won't you?

I don't do astrology other then looking up mine for shits and giggles but from my understanding. Yeah, pretty much.

Its just seems to be look at people born at X time and notice the pattern and trends. So when your on planet Gloorp you notice the people born in Glunderdary under the star sign Klakeron the Smith tend to be pushy it gets written down thats how those people are.

Then you get all your basic bitches who say they are such a Zeeklbop and they cant help be flighty.
 
I can't say that there are aren't a few men who hate or dislike astrology because it's a "girly" thing. What I can say with absolute certainty is that Astrology is bullshit regardless. Furthermore, Women who won't date men because said men think Astrology is bullshit are ultimately helping those men dodge quite a proverbial bullet.
If I recall correctly astrolgy was used to make calandars, keep dates and navigation.

Some historian probably noticed certain events happen at certain intervals after reading his history books. He would tell the king what he learned and the king being the not an egghead would assume the signs at certain times had power over events. Not true but I guess the court historian humored the king cause correcting the guy in charge back in those days could lead to a date with the torture chambers.
 
I see nothing wrong with being interested in astrology as long as you don't actually think it's real. Like, if a date wanted to do a tarot reading for fun, I'd actually think it'd be kind of cool. I wouldn't think they were a kook unless they show a sincere belief in the results.

A lot of dumb women think it's real and even base major life and relationship decisions on it. It's not "fun"; it's psychosis.

 
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