Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

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There's something deeply surreal about an academic type talking about yaoi as if it's Shakespeare.
There is a plethora of academic types who naval gaze and write papers about bullshit stuff you would expect would get them laughed at. But there is the same type of "modern art" brainrot at all levels where as long as you can make up whatever bullshit you need to make someone seem worthy of "discussion" gets you, well, if not actual praise then not losing your credentials.
 
Fucking barf. How absolutely cringe. You KNOW she’s a Destiel shipper. I remember those unhinged bitches from my tumblr days a decade ago. They’re just as awful as those johnlock shippers from the same time.

Pooners are the worst, goddamn. How lame do you have to be to have this shirt in 2024?
that shirt mentions a wincest ship, she 1000 percent ships Sam and Dean.
Just two whores having to stand next to a subhuman fujo and pretend that there isn't everything off-putting :sighduck:
 

I see you have studied your pooners good sir!

There’s this subreddit for “feminine trans men” where they all look like your drawings, like literally a girl with big boobs and then a he/him pronoun sticker and shortish hair.

Or some fat chick in a Lolita dress with frilly laces and the tiniest whisker of a “beard”.
 

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What does the pooners dream life look like?
Well, they believe male privilege and the patriarchy are real, even after pooning and realizing they are just as worthless as the average short pudgy male is they still believe it and instead blame transphobia for experiencing what the average man of their complexion does every day of their lives.

Then there's the sexual aspect: pooners think men are getting laid all the time (see the trannyfesto) because their only frame of reference are the men who pumped 'n dumped them when they still looked like girls or hardcore porn which is a literal fantasy no men experiences IRL outside an adult film studio. On the other hand you have the ones who think yaoi is real and they can have that kind of relantionship, only to crash into the gay scene and realize most of the guys there couldn't care less about romance.
NEW COMPLICATION UNLOCKED!!!

Lil’ pooner got a penis… And traded for her hair!

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This phallo made me chuckle what the F went wrong?


Looks like the surgeon started to trim the excess fat but then went “Meh whatever, it’s fiiine” halfway through.
This loonie chick just got her body wrecked forever, she's a medical experiment not even mengele himself would dare create, sterile forever, but she gets a panic attack at male pattern baldness...

And those cutting scars on the penis, is there even one pooner out there who wasn't that girl with razorblades in her backpack?
as well as telling them that if they pretend hard enough they "belong" in the absolutely deranged, sex pesty gay culture.
What's weird is that none of these pooners used to be nymphos, which is as close as it gets to the amount of sex the average gay gets.
All girls are soft, you're fat and flabby, put down the fork and hit the gym you fattyboombatty.
 
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On the other hand you have the ones who think yaoi is real and they can have that kind of relantionship, only to crash into the gay scene and realize most of the guys there couldn't care less about romance.
The romantic yaoi ones are t4t, the ones pursuing gay men are bpd and fine with pump and dump as long as they feel that they're both equally disconnected. Pooners don't like that in het hookups the assumption is that you are invested as the girl, even if you're not, and men will often repeatedly hit you up for attention / as a fallback for a long time afterwards because they simply do not accept that you're not emotionally invested in them. When a gay says he's not emotionally invested and doesn't expect you to be, he means it. BPDs need 100% matched emotional intensity which is possible when you're both just there to fuck, it is not possible when a guy is trying to backburner you. It fucks with their condition and sucks for them.
 
What's weird is that none of these pooners used to be nymphos, which is as close as it gets to the amount of sex the average gay gets.
I think we've seen a few cases among the "pooners of Grindr" set where you have straight/bi women who want to be able to slut it up with fewer social repercussions, and they believe that becoming a gay man is the way to do it. But it's not a common type.
 
I think we've seen a few cases among the "pooners of Grindr" set where you have straight/bi women who want to be able to slut it up with fewer social repercussions, and they believe that becoming a gay man is the way to do it. But it's not a common type.
Hypersexuality is hardly unusual in women with BPD and other Cluster B disorders, and I’ll bet you there’s a sizable cohort of those among pooners.

Add CSA to the pile and using sex as currency out of habit. So yeah. Some pooners have a lot of sex.
 
Oh the places pooners you'll go find on tumblr
Here's @c3rvida3, just the manliest man who ever did man.
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And the post that drew me to her, because I've seen enough fat, hairy, tattooed pooners to know that's their default state.
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The writing style of that last post is the writing style of someone who peaked in 8th grade, in the "gifted and talented education" class
 
The writing style of that last post is the writing style of someone who peaked in 8th grade, in the "gifted and talented education" class
That entire post is trying so, so, so fucking hard. It’s tryhard fanfiction reminiscent of those awful fetish story images with a porn screenshot surrounded by walls of text about sissification or something. This creature might as well have been masturbating while writing it.
 
Oh the places pooners you'll go find on tumblr
Here's @c3rvida3, just the manliest man who ever did man.
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And the post that drew me to her, because I've seen enough fat, hairy, tattooed pooners to know that's their default state.
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Wonder what happened in the lil’ doods life that turned him into a sleepy, fat, tattooed gnome that sleeps in a mushroom bed, and decorates his house like a boomer who’s REALLY hooked on that mushroom trip they did in ‘73.

Wonder what her family feels. The disappointment must be crushing and intense.
 
Wonder what happened in the lil’ doods life that turned him into a sleepy, fat, tattooed gnome that sleeps in a mushroom bed, and decorates his house like a boomer who’s REALLY hooked on that mushroom trip they did in ‘73.

Wonder what her family feels. The disappointment must be crushing and intense.
Well, you know, all those hunting trips and chilli cookoffs really take it out of a guy. Amirite, men?
 
Oh the places pooners you'll go find on tumblr
Here's @c3rvida3, just the manliest man who ever did man.

Not gonna lie, the bedspread and pillows are pretty rad. I enjoy the mushroom/fall aesthetic associated with that genre of women who LARP as witches and listen to pop indie music (aka very manly doooooddd look at the campfire plushie).

Scrolling through that blog, it doesn’t even occur to me that this is a pooner other than the he/him at the top and the occasional musings about being a dood. Some of the jokes are even kind of funny, if I were a late teen. The age 29 makes me sad, because all I see is a woman trapped in her peak 2012 tumblr era who doesn’t want to let go even after her friends have long abandoned the site.
 
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