Things that I, Joshua "Null" Moon, would like to do but cannot

svetlalala said:
Awe. Someone is nervous about turning 30 this year. Soon your body will be too old and tired to wrestle alligators like your fellow Florida Man.

Also, you're not a felon. :/ How come no guns? Also, just make your gf get them in her name and keep them at her house. Loop Hole.
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I don't think he is a felon, but he does have outstanding warrants in the US, no?
 
Manul Otocolobus said:
I don't think he is a felon, but he does have outstanding warrants in the US, no?
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I have no idea. Warrants for what? I guess I earned those -tism stickers. I don't know much about this nigga. My bad. I was just trying to be a dick.
 
svetlalala said:
I have no idea. Warrants for what? I guess I earned those -tism stickers. I don't know much about this nigga. My bad. I was just trying to be a dick.
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If I'm not mistaken, they are all contempt of state and federal court. The judge basically said "Bring your ass to court" and Josh essentially said "Fuck your mother. Serbia has no extradition treaty with you". So, they can't touch him, but it also restricts him from flying to any country that does maintain an extradition treaty or returning to the US.
 
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Manul Otocolobus said:
If I'm not mistaken, they are all contempt of state and federal court. The judge basically said "Bring your ass to court" and Josh essentially said "Fuck your mother. Serbia has no extradition treaty with you". So, they can't touch him, but it also restricts him from flying to any country that does maintain an extradition treaty or returning to the US.
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Based. Josh has big fucking balls.

Sucks for him. though :( He can't see his mom. I always figured he came back to visit sometimes on the low. I'm guessing there is no way to reconcile them without just turning himself in. Gay.

🏃‍♂️ Run, Josh, run. 🏃‍♂️
 
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1. Parachuting
I am very afraid of heights and am also poor. Renting a plane and jumping out of it is something I would like to do but cannot.

2. Live in Mexico like a Cool Mob Boss
I like to imagine myself as one of the cool mobsters from Goodfellas or something, living in a nice villa out in Mexico like a king, snorting cocaine with blatant disregard for whatever children I have left behind. To live this life would be truly epic and badass.

3. Punch a Hater
I have many haters but as I live in Serbia as a wanted fugitive I cannot punch them. If I punched a hater right in his stupid fucking face I would feel very empowered, but alas, I am unable to.

4. Spin a Loaded Pistol on my Finger
I like western movies and want to take a loaded revolver and spin it around like John Wayne. Unfortunately, as a wanted fugitive abroad, I cannot own a firearm and I don't think I can do something so cool.

5. Wrestle an Alligator
I lived in Florida most of my life but unlike most Floridians I have never wrestled with an Alligator. This makes me feel like a bad Floridian.

6. Own a Motorcycle
Motorcycles are badass. I am genuinely terrified of riding on these.

I am very glad most other people don't do these things because if I saw someone doing these cool things I would feel very jealous and also owned.
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Ralph: "Heh-heh, all of these things Jawshua Mooon listed could lead to his death!"
 
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I posted the following in the african man thread but it seems more proper here:
"
Yeah man I want to see áfrica myself , and try their traditional dishes. Especially their tap water . I heard is so clean for all the minerals in the soil. I also want to fuck prostitutes with no rubber so that way I can have a more complete sex experience with an actual African woman. I also want to go an meet a lot of strangers and kindly show them some of the riches that there are in 1st world country's I bet they would love that , especially European fashion like new trends for man attire.
It seems fun to go take a hike into a desolate part of the savanna and maybe see some wild creatures around , take a lot of pictures with flash on so the lighting can amplify the beauty of this wonderful animals.

Man I would really love to do these things . It would be a shame if somebody I actually dislike does that before me . I would really really hate if some that I dislike does these things before I do"
 
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TurdFondler said:
Spinning a revolver is cool, but wearing a holster is kind of gay and low T, real alphas keep their gun in a designer man purse.
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I regret to inform you that keeping your gun in a designer man purse is very impractical and not what a real alpha male does. When out on the mean streets of west Memphis a real alpha needs to be ready for anything, so he just keeps his pistol stuck in his waistband, no safety, round in the chamber, ready to defend himself and his lovely family from the ayelawgs at any moment.
 
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Jersh is so poor, he can't afford to buy 200 kgs of Ammonium Nitrate and a plane ticket to Washington DC to start his dream of owning a farm.

So sad, I hope that an alpha male chad doesn't do that before Jersh accomplishes this dream, that would obviously cause Jersh to mald and seethe over being owned so hard.
 
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DSP's Tax Lawyer said:
No, beta cucks stay sober and lose weight. Real chads chug Maker's Mark and get so fat that they need an electric scooter to go places
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I hope he doesn't get himself a hover-round scooter, the clips of him walking like a creep sneaking around a house of sleeping people are too funny. He's so fat and his body is so oddly proportioned he has to lean backwards and overstep just to keep from falling over. His walking is comedic perfection.
 
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Blue Miaplacidus said:
I hope he doesn't get himself a hover-round scooter, the clips of him walking like a creep sneaking around a house of sleeping people are too funny. He's so fat and his body is so oddly proportioned he has to lean backwards and overstep just to keep from falling over. His walking is comedic perfection.
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There was a tv infomercial with a wheelchair that could climb stairs. Probably was a piece of junk but only a chad would buy one and find out.

 
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I also wish I could do those things or even get a chance to co-host america first with Nick Fuentes. One day….
 
Sexy Potoo said:
Jersh is so poor, he can't afford to buy 200 kgs of Ammonium Nitrate and a plane ticket to Washington DC to start his dream of owning a farm.

So sad, I hope that an alpha male chad doesn't do that before Jersh accomplishes this dream, that would obviously cause Jersh to mald and seethe over being owned so hard.
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I wish I was so alpha male Chad as to make mustard gas in my home. Only cool guys do things like that.
 
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I heard Null really wanted to fly to France to play chicken with a TGV but he's on a watchlist so cant go :'(
 
I personally would really like to try walking 2 miles. The outside world is pretty scary though and my feet might get blisters and I might get very tired from walking 2 whole miles by myself. I should probably do it next to a delicious baguette shop so I don't get too exhausted from all the walking and I can replenish my energy with a tasty footlong and get a bottle of coke as a treat!
SpicSpeigel said:
I posted the following in the african man thread but it seems more proper here:
"
Yeah man I want to see áfrica myself , and try their traditional dishes. Especially their tap water . I heard is so clean for all the minerals in the soil. I also want to fuck prostitutes with no rubber so that way I can have a more complete sex experience with an actual African woman. I also want to go an meet a lot of strangers and kindly show them some of the riches that there are in 1st world country's I bet they would love that , especially European fashion like new trends for man attire.
It seems fun to go take a hike into a desolate part of the savanna and maybe see some wild creatures around , take a lot of pictures with flash on so the lighting can amplify the beauty of this wonderful animals.

Man I would really love to do these things . It would be a shame if somebody I actually dislike does that before me . I would really really hate if some that I dislike does these things before I do"
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Completely unrelated but that peanut curry dish from senegal that Chantelle's former African concubine made looked pretty good!
 
Neil said:
Didn't you, Josh "Null" Moon also want to move to Gambia and start your entire life over there?
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What teams is he a fan of? I want to find out what gang hoods he could get killed if he wore the wrong hat in. Most dopey white guys could talk their way out of an ass beating and the gang guys would realize he's just a sports fan not worth catching a body for but Ralph couldn't talk his way out of... I got nothing, I can't think of something that's really easy to talk your way out of. Hopefully someone else steps up.
 
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