Things that I, Joshua "Null" Moon, would like to do but cannot

Could have shortened this list down to a simple:

1. Follow in the footsteps of my dear old dad, Coach Redpill.
 
Null is too much of a pussy to stop taking pills
 

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Null could do the motorbike thing more sedately with a Ural Dalesman or similar sidecar machine. There's also the BMW C1 of a few years ago with a car like rollcage but even South Park mocked those.
 
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So I skydive. As long as you aren't a complete fucking mong doing stupid swoops it is statistically much much safer than riding a motorcycle. It might even be safer than driving, idk. Just wanted to throw that out there - you should research the stats yourself, I don't want you to miss out over what may just be some misconceptions.

But yes lol it is very terrifying. It is one of the most unnatural things you can do if you think about it.

Edit: https://www.dropzone.com/dropzones/serbia/
 
Man I would really love to do these things . It would be a shame if somebody I actually dislike does that before me . I would really really hate if some that I dislike does these things before I do"
I’ve thought about doing similar things but in the US where things are much more based and cool. I would feel incredibly owned and completely felted if someone took a video of themselves walking around west Memphis yelling “y’all some broke ass niggers” at every black person they see.

Thankfully, no one is man enough to do this though.
 
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1. Parachuting
I am very afraid of heights and am also poor. Renting a plane and jumping out of it is something I would like to do but cannot.
Yes if only there were skydiving places where you didn't have to "rent a plane", but could just strap yourself onto the front of a real man, and do this. BTW everyone thinks fear of heights is an issue when skydiving, but at 12000 feet there's no perception of height, much like when looking at your penis.

2. Live in Mexico like a Cool Mob Boss
You can't even live in some lawless Eastern Euro shithole like a non-faggot, so forget this dream. You'd have moar chance of building your own internet or optimising queries

3. Punch a Hater
I have many haters but as I live in Serbia as a wanted fugitive I cannot punch them. If I punched a hater right in his stupid fucking face I would feel very empowered, but alas, I am unable to.
lol come at me bro. Also, "wanted fugitive" is redundant, however if anyone was able to pull off being an unwanted fugitive, then it would be you, you fucking waste of cum.

4. Spin a Loaded Pistol on my Finger
I like western movies and want to take a loaded revolver and spin it around like John Wayne. Unfortunately, as a wanted fugitive abroad, I cannot own a firearm
hahahaha wow you really did stop developing at around 15 years old. What happened then, lil mooney? Was that when the toaster you kept in your bedroom to make midnight snacks caught fire and burned your house down?? Or was 15 when your crack whore mother started turning you out for rocks?
Either way, the "omg look at me I'm fugitive" bullshit is as gay as this fucking forum.
Actually, not it's not. There are not many things as gay as KF.
Anyway, you could get a gun and spin it if you wanted to. The only thing stopping you doing this is you. Well, you and genetics. Your pudgy fat fingers would probably get stuck in the guard.

5. Wrestle an Alligator
You are a fuckwit.

6. Own a Motorcycle
I am genuinely terrified of riding on these.
You can own one without riding it, so your broken mind has betrayed you once again.
Also, just pretend it's a cock; you'll be able to ride it with no probs.

I am very glad most other people don't do these things because if I saw someone doing these cool things I would feel very jealous and also owned.
You are not funny. You sound like a 4th rate rip off of It's Always Sunny.
You are fat and will die alone.
 
Yes if only there were skydiving places where you didn't have to "rent a plane", but could just strap yourself onto the front of a real man, and do this. BTW everyone thinks fear of heights is an issue when skydiving, but at 12000 feet there's no perception of height, much like when looking at your penis.


You can't even live in some lawless Eastern Euro shithole like a non-faggot, so forget this dream. You'd have moar chance of building your own internet or optimising queries


lol come at me bro. Also, "wanted fugitive" is redundant, however if anyone was able to pull off being an unwanted fugitive, then it would be you, you fucking waste of cum.


hahahaha wow you really did stop developing at around 15 years old. What happened then, lil mooney? Was that when the toaster you kept in your bedroom to make midnight snacks caught fire and burned your house down?? Or was 15 when your crack whore mother started turning you out for rocks?
Either way, the "omg look at me I'm fugitive" bullshit is as gay as this fucking forum.
Actually, not it's not. There are not many things as gay as KF.
Anyway, you could get a gun and spin it if you wanted to. The only thing stopping you doing this is you. Well, you and genetics. Your pudgy fat fingers would probably get stuck in the guard.


You are a fuckwit.


You can own one without riding it, so your broken mind has betrayed you once again.
Also, just pretend it's a cock; you'll be able to ride it with no probs.


You are not funny. You sound like a 4th rate rip off of It's Always Sunny.
You are fat and will die alone.
Hi Ralph!
 
Yes if only there were skydiving places where you didn't have to "rent a plane", but could just strap yourself onto the front of a real man, and do this. BTW everyone thinks fear of heights is an issue when skydiving, but at 12000 feet there's no perception of height, much like when looking at your penis.


You can't even live in some lawless Eastern Euro shithole like a non-faggot, so forget this dream. You'd have moar chance of building your own internet or optimising queries


lol come at me bro. Also, "wanted fugitive" is redundant, however if anyone was able to pull off being an unwanted fugitive, then it would be you, you fucking waste of cum.


hahahaha wow you really did stop developing at around 15 years old. What happened then, lil mooney? Was that when the toaster you kept in your bedroom to make midnight snacks caught fire and burned your house down?? Or was 15 when your crack whore mother started turning you out for rocks?
Either way, the "omg look at me I'm fugitive" bullshit is as gay as this fucking forum.
Actually, not it's not. There are not many things as gay as KF.
Anyway, you could get a gun and spin it if you wanted to. The only thing stopping you doing this is you. Well, you and genetics. Your pudgy fat fingers would probably get stuck in the guard.


You are a fuckwit.


You can own one without riding it, so your broken mind has betrayed you once again.
Also, just pretend it's a cock; you'll be able to ride it with no probs.


You are not funny. You sound like a 4th rate rip off of It's Always Sunny.
You are fat and will die alone.
The screeches of a jilted lover ladies and gentlemen.
 
I've always wanted to get/borrow a portaledge and try cliff camping in some local mountains, but as a humble NZ farmer, I'm absolutely petrified at the thought!!! Someone with the balls to do it would absolutely devastate me!
 
psycho.png
A true RALPHAMALE would probably fly to California right now and kidnap his son to save him from getting circumsized. Only a little scared b i t c h would let this medical procedure take place and not intervene immediately.
 
With a motorcycle Null, it is very cool to ride. It is expensive to maintain however. Basic registration, Protective gear that needs replacing every 3 years or so, insurance that is expensive for a new rider with less than 2 years experience, on going maintenance costs (tires only last about 3 - 5k km before replacement, cars can go longer), no protection from the elements so cold and rain are also a factor.
There's also what type of bike you want, I got a very nice scooter because I suck at manual transmission but can easily ride it no problem. If you're having trouble with 2 wheels you can get a motortricycle, finding one under 10K though, yeah good luck with that.

I urge you to get one though, zooming around the back roads where you live with no traffic is an experience.
 
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@Null

4. Spin a Loaded Pistol on my Finger
I like western movies and want to take a loaded revolver and spin it around like John Wayne. Unfortunately, as a wanted fugitive abroad, I cannot own a firearm and I don't think I can do something so cool.
You live in Serbia, a place that to my certain knowledge is full of mad Serbs (but I repeat myself) and guns. You can do this.
Hell, just get a Serb girlfriend angry; you'll be lucky if she doesn't show up with a gun. I believe light stabbing is a courtship ritual there.
 
@Null you messed up by posting this publicly dude. Just calling it as I see it. You know Ralph reads this board, right? He could probably do your entire bucket list in a week, and he probably would too. And you know he will probably turn it into a big event and use it to fundraise. Just seems like you’re handing him an easy “W” by putting this info out. Can you imagine the insufferable smirk on his fat pig face as he’s skydiving, saying “how you like me now Jawsh? You can’t even afford to skydive!” Makes my blood boil just thinking about it. I fucking hate watching Ralph get victories over us.
Ralph is too fat to skydive and too poor and too bitchmade to buy a motorcycle, and his trotters are too fat to successfully spin a loaded revolver without Alec Baldwining either himself or Meigh.
He can't prove me wrong because deep down he's the same scared little pantshitter we saw with his Gunt flopping out onto the streets of Lisbon crying for the police to come save him.
 
Null is too afraid to gain immunity to snake venom by being bit by various snakes, using a hose to cut off circulation and then suck out the venom, or use anti-venom.

Null is also too much of a faggot pussy to physically beat Cancerman to death while the Gook wife of cancer man looks on in horror and arousal.
 
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