Warhammer 40k

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Humble Architect said:
Just adapt my 2000s comedies into Warhammer.

Istvaan III gang but they’re starring in the Hangover, they got a revolution to launch but Morty, Fulgrim and Angron lost Horus.

Wedding Crashers but it’s Kharn and Argel Tal crashing Armatura

Old School but instead of a fraternity it’s three Terran marines starting a warrior lodge in a stuffy loyalist legion.
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I have a few movie titles in mind such as Dude where's my Devilfish? Maybe even an Don't be a Weird Boy in the Mek Yard while drinking Squig Juice in da hood.
 
So I guess the space marine 1 "master crafted edition" turned out to be a giant waste of time.
Reviews mostly negative, people shitting on it for being buggy, sometimes not even launching, crash issues, and being $40. Came out last week and hardly anyone is talking about it, and seemingly for good reason. I assumed this was going to be $20 when it was announced, not fucking $40 and a buggy mess on top of that.
 
p1138 said:
So I guess the space marine 1 "master crafted edition" turned out to be a giant waste of time.
Reviews mostly negative, people shitting on it for being buggy, sometimes not even launching, crash issues, and being $40. Came out last week and hardly anyone is talking about it, and seemingly for good reason. I assumed this was going to be $20 when it was announced, not fucking $40 and a buggy mess on top of that.
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Only a fool expected otherwise.
 
[ultra depression]
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Humble Architect said:
Just adapt my 2000s comedies into Warhammer.

Istvaan III gang but they’re starring in the Hangover, they got a revolution to launch but Morty, Fulgrim and Angron lost Horus.

Wedding Crashers but it’s Kharn and Argel Tal crashing Armatura

Old School but instead of a fraternity it’s three Terran marines starting a warrior lodge in a stuffy loyalist legion.
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Hot Fuzz but with a near comedically puritanical and fanatical inquisitor sent to a backwater yet idyllic agri world due to literally every other inquisitor in the segmentum thinking he is batshit crazy to the point of being a liability, despite him invariably being entirely on the money in his paranoia. Becomes convinced there is a chaos cult at work after a series of grizzly murders, but is hampered by a near unique "you are not allowed to kill or torture or burn shit down, just observe and assist the local authorities if necessary" edict applied to him out of spite by his former colleagues, and the bumbling ogryn assigned to be his liason with said local authorities who all seem to be strangely in tune with one another and also supremely unconcerned about the carnage happening on their world, and are also mostly bald and weirdly pale looking.

The twist at the end is that the cult is PSYCH NOT GENESTEALERS. The local authorities are actually even more psychotically fanatical than he is and see the whole imperium as being corrupted and in need of mass purging, which they have the means of carrying out due to the planet also having insane amounts of stupidly overpowered DAOT tech hidden bellow its surface, some of which being radioactive enough to make them lose their hair and inadvertently make them look like genestealer cultists, and had actively conspired to get him assigned there thinking he would be the perfect ally and asset for their cause.

EDIT: Yes I know the obvious twist would have been to use the Tau because of "the greater good" and all but.....fuck you
 
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Was wondering if there was a way to get a Kiwifarms Dark Heresy game going and then I realized I don’t need another thing over taking my life.
 
Team Ultramar: Galactic Police.

And yes....it would be filmed entirely with marionette puppets, from the chase scene where Cato Sicarius accidentally blows up Inwit/Krieg/Deliverance while his battle barge chases an Ork Freeboota ship through the Segmentum Tempestus, to the scene where Abaddon feeds Eldrad to his pet grox after being sternly told to stop summoning Daemons, to the overly scatalogical sex scene involving a great unclean one and seven sisters of silence.
 
Muad'Dick said:
There are a bunch of themes you could have explored for your strong independent wamen character that wouldn't need any embellishment. As you say, isolation is a big one. Fighting for the very people who would probably have hunted you down like a witch when you were younger. The horror of the Black Ships. Shit, you could probably even take a dive into the metaphysical aspect of being a blank - in a setting where the soul is real, how do you reconcile not having one?
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Exactly. Strong Blanks are repulsive to even their families, and the Black Ships have the sisters be equally cruel to innocent but incredibly dangerous people.
The Secret Sauce said:
Well the entire point of the Amazon show is to bastardize and ruin the setting. Once you factor that in, it makes perfect sense.
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I'm assuming it is to keep everyone subscribed to Amazon's mail order service. Is Cavill still involved?
Catgirl Tyranid said:
Nothing needs to change, just make Dredd 2012 again, but with Gene Stealers instead of drug addicts.
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I think GW would want to distance Arbites as far away from Judge Dredd as possible.
I'm amazed they haven't got in legal trouble for cloning the design.
Yes, GW heavily borrowed elements from Dune and Elric, but they made it their own thing. Can a non-fan even tell the difference?

BTW I loved Dredd 3D, and saw it multiple times in the cinema.
ToroidalBoat said:
"Warhammer 40k vs StarCraft | Warhammer 40k meme dub"
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Interestingly in the pre-canon 1st edition of 40k, Space Marines were brainwashed criminals like the Starcraft marines ended up being.
 
daniel day said:
Can we get adaptations of sitcoms too? Id love Everybody Hates Argel Tal, or Fullgrim House. Sex in the City but Eidolon would also be funny.
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Two and a Half Men but it’s Lucius, Fabius and a Fulgrim clone. Lucius literally runs his warband just like Charlie Harper lived his life, hands-off, indulgent, defer all responsibility to the housekeeper/demon and the apothecary/accountant.
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The Salamander crossover episode
 
Inquisitor_BadAss said:
Am I the only one hoping to see a blood bowl series? I've never played but for an audience grabber, literal fantasy football could be the real winner.
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I play Blood Bowl, Tabletop and the Blood Bowl 2 and 3 videogames. I fucking love Blood Bowl. Maybe 15 years ago, I'd have been psyched for a BB movie/series... but these days, I'm certain they'd fuck it up.
 
Spilled Spaghett said:
Blood Bowl is kind of hard to do because it's already a spin off and doesn't really have any story telling. Yeah each team references their fantasy faction and tries to mirror it in their playstyle, but how long would people want to watch fantasy football? It'd do fine as a one off animation I think, but what would a whole series even be about?

Blood Bowl as a game also has many problems that just aren't fun. I like the concept but it's honestly a poorly designed game. It's painfully slow since every single action you do has a chance of catastrophic failure which makes getting anything done impossible. There's too much counting and math involved, checking positions of every piece per action for bonuses and debuffs. And at the end of the day your opponent is just going to stall. They'll sit at the end zone until the half is over because there is literally nothing any team can do to break a cage once its formed. Your best hope is to wall them off as well until the end of the half so that nobody scores and you all just wasted your time.
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My apologies for the double post... You can mitigate the "luck of the roll" somewhat, which is a big part of the strategy for "competition" Blood Bowl, but I don't play that way. The game was originally designed as a skirmish game (It literally used the Warhammer rules and stats with some ball-handling stuff tacked on in the first edition). I still play it largely like that. My score is the body count at the end of the game. I play a very high risk style. I'll "lose" some games that way, but as long as I've sent some of the opponents' players to the morgue, I'm happy.

And if you don't like the math involved...play the videogame version.
 
Have not played WH40K games or vidya and I'm only familiar with the overall lore and some of the memes. Wouldn't want to live in WH40K galaxy. But so far I think my favorite Space Marines chapter is either those Ultramarines (that Greco-Roman theme), or Imperial Fists.

"TTS Dorn WHY" - DOW234
 
GloryHole Stalker said:
My apologies for the double post... You can mitigate the "luck of the roll" somewhat, which is a big part of the strategy for "competition" Blood Bowl, but I don't play that way. The game was originally designed as a skirmish game (It literally used the Warhammer rules and stats with some ball-handling stuff tacked on in the first edition). I still play it largely like that. My score is the body count at the end of the game. I play a very high risk style. I'll "lose" some games that way, but as long as I've sent some of the opponents' players to the morgue, I'm happy.

And if you don't like the math involved...play the videogame version.
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Mighty blow claws typed this.
 
GloryHole Stalker said:
My apologies for the double post... You can mitigate the "luck of the roll" somewhat, which is a big part of the strategy for "competition" Blood Bowl, but I don't play that way. The game was originally designed as a skirmish game (It literally used the Warhammer rules and stats with some ball-handling stuff tacked on in the first edition). I still play it largely like that. My score is the body count at the end of the game. I play a very high risk style. I'll "lose" some games that way, but as long as I've sent some of the opponents' players to the morgue, I'm happy.

And if you don't like the math involved...play the videogame version.
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I've played both the tabletop version and the video game version. The video games do help with a lot of math, but you do need to know some of it ahead of time before you move. Last thing you want to do is walk into blocking range and realize that actually your bonuses don't give you a strength advantage, but now you've committed. Or at least you need to understand what you might need to turn a risky play into something relatively safe. I'm aware that the name of the game is mainly risk mitigation but I really do feel the consequence of that is slow and painful. It's extremely easy to get put into an unwinnable situation right from the start if you did the wrong move at the wrong time, got unlucky and turned over to the opponent. I'm aware to stand your guys up first, do all your moves that don't involve dice rolling, etc. I think it just makes for a really clunky experience and makes me always feel like I have to second guess myself if I did everything in the correct order.

I can't overstate how much I hate the stalling meta too. There's literally no incentive to be the first to score. Nearly every game plays out the same where the opponent cages, there's literally nothing I can do, and nothing happens for several turns. It makes many teams like Elves who don't have big strong players almost impossible to play. Even if they aren't caging what's my only option against an Ork who has the ball? It's to run the clock and stall them until the half runs out. I tried playing Lizardmen which was a bit more of an upgrade. I have some guys that are capable of actually playing the game, and some skinks who are fast if nothing else.

Even though I personally love the idea of having a meta game where your team grows and changes as you play games, the reality is if your star player dies, or gets a niggling injury, you may as well just give up and re-roll a team. Trying to replace them would require so many games, and a good deal of luck that you are basically starting from scratch any ways. Maybe if you're a turbo autist the thought of being able to kill the opponent's MVP and crippling their team for the rest of the season sounds like dramatic story telling, until it happens to you and you realize that you're now the punching bag of this story and you're expected to show up for a few more weeks for your scheduled beating.

I thought about introducing it to my friends to see if they'd take to it, just playing the video game at least. I thought how do I sell it to them? What's the really cool thing about Blood Bowl that gets people excited? And I realized that all the fun stuff basically stops once you've made your team. You pick their name, your uniforms, name all your players, pick a cool fantasy race, but once you get in game it's nothing but explaining all the unfun traps that will happen to you and are mostly outside your control.
 
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