Containment What If?

Saney said:
You know how in Rollercoaster Tycoon you can make some of your rides so dangerously unsafe that they can actually kill guests? Yeah, that would happen.

"I want to get off the Mayor-for-Life's Wild Ride."
"I want to get off the Mayor-for-Life's Wild Ride."
"I want to get off the Mayor-for-Life's Wild Ride."
"I want to get off the Mayor-for-Life's Wild Ride."
"I want to get off the Mayor-for-Life's Wild Ride."

"We all do, son. We all do."
 
CatParty said:
i'm pretty sure it would be cartmanland fused with the most dangerous theme park (for us jersians we know all bout this one) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_Park

Hahaha, I wish I had a time machine to go there. Action Park has always sounded hardcore. But you're right about the combo.

Let answer this question more in depth, and assume Chris had the funds and the True and Honest developers to help him. It would obviously be called Cwcville Amusement Park or CWCLAND or something. It would probably feature a ride similar to the Spiderman ride in Universal Islands of Adventure where costumed Michael Snyders, Jerkops, and Mary Lee Walsh's threaten to take you down and ChrisChanSonichu saves the day with CurseYeHaMeHas.
And there would have to be some kind of Splash Mountain ride that takes you through the city of Cwcville - seeing all of Chris' abominations in their natural habitat before plummeting to your doom because Chris didn't finish his new "river" design in CADD or something.
CWCLAND would only serve Orange Fanta, REEB, and CWCola in addition to chicken nuggets, apple dippers, and WHOLE BLOCKA CHEESE's. Guest's with birthdays can reserve a party room where the characters of Sonichu present them with chocolate cake that would normally cost a lotta yen...

...also there would have to be a ride called the DIRTY CRAPPED COASTER. JUST BECAUSE.
 
pickleniggo said:
CatParty said:
i'm pretty sure it would be cartmanland fused with the most dangerous theme park (for us jersians we know all bout this one) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_Park

Hahaha, I wish I had a time machine to go there. Action Park has always sounded hardcore. But you're right about the combo.

Let answer this question more in depth, and assume Chris had the funds and the True and Honest developers to help him. It would obviously be called Cwcville Amusement Park or CWCLAND or something. It would probably feature a ride similar to the Spiderman ride in Universal Islands of Adventure where costumed Michael Snyders, Jerkops, and Mary Lee Walsh's threaten to take you down and ChrisChanSonichu saves the day with CurseYeHaMeHas.
And there would have to be some kind of Splash Mountain ride that takes you through the city of Cwcville - seeing all of Chris' abominations in their natural habitat before plummeting to your doom because Chris didn't finish his new "river" design in CADD or something.
CWCLAND would only serve Orange Fanta, REEB, and CWCola in addition to chicken nuggets, apple dippers, and WHOLE BLOCKA CHEESE's. Guest's with birthdays can reserve a party room where the characters of Sonichu present them with chocolate cake that would normally cost a lotta yen...

...also there would have to be a ride called the DIRTY CRAPPED COASTER. JUST BECAUSE.

oh look you can have an awkward photo at your birthday with the owner!


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Sonichu shit everywhere. It would be like a bizarre nightmare.
 
For some reason I see him traveling back in time thinking that he'd be able to score since women were easier to catch back then, only for him to screw his mother without realizing it and impregnate her with him. Freaked out, Chris tries to time travel to stop himself, but since this is Chris, he wouldn't have paid attention to any instructions and went back even further in time and somehow managed to sleep with Barb's mom. This would essentially make Chris his own grandfather and father. Cue an endless stream of Chris going back in time and fathering the generation before the last, leading to an evolutionary tree that not only doesn't fork, it sort of implodes into the thinnest line possible.

Assuming that the copyright owners don't sue Chris into tomorrow, I can see Chris succeeding on some parts of the theme park. Designed well, costumes for Sonichu and Rosechu would probably go over well with the kids. They're brightly colored and pretty simple one dimensional characters. It's not like they're Nietzschu or anything. Also assuming that Chris could get the ability to make up his own songs set to popular music, that would have potential as well. I figure that Chris would probably buy one of everything he saw at Busch Gardens and Kings Dominion, so I don't think he'd actually try to build a roller coaster. He might say he'd like one that does this or that, but I'm going to give him credit enough to where he knows that this is outside of his sphere of knowledge and if one of his staff told him that his design wouldn't work, he'd very grudgingly go along with it.

Where it'd get messed up is that Chris doesn't have any sort of filter, partially because of his autism but mostly because nobody ever really taught him self restraint until he was far too old to properly learn this lesson and what little he did learn had been hammered out of him by Barb's coddling.

Unsatisfied with merely having decent rides, colorful mascots, and cheerful songs about being happy, Chris would try to add in little "extras" here and there. Rather than have something along the lines of Disneyland's Club 33 where people can go for "fancy" meals and alcohol in a setting that's still family friendly, Chris would have well, a bordello/strip joint. He'd have women in Rosechu costumes stripping "for women's rights" at the very least, with options to back to the CWC Park equivalent of the Champagne Room. I can see him calling it the CWC Room and being mostly oblivious to the jokes that would come out of it. The songs would be especially bad because Chris would be Chris and he'd use the songs as a way of pushing whatever current viewpoint he had, blasting out somethign along the lines of "Boyfriend". Of course there would be the anti-trolling measures and I imagine that he'd have people stopped just for looking like a troll. Which of course means that he'd anyone that doesn't look like him.

He'd probably be fairly light at first, eventually growing increasingly worse with time as he tries to exert his control over the park. Eventually some golddigger would talk him into getting hitched without a prenup, squirt out a kid, then take him to the cleaners, assuming that he didn't run everyone off by this point.
 
Repeat Bane and Talia's thing from The Dark Knight Rises without a nuke. Kangaroo court for the sonichus with Judge Giovanni presiding over the sentencing.
 
Let's say he was nominated for (insert Oscar category), and was allowed to attend the Oscars.

What sort of vehicle would he show up in?

What would he wear?

How would he handle interviews?

How would he react to the actresses/potential sweethearts?

What would his reaction be if he won (or not) an Oscar?

What would his acceptence speech be about?
 
He would show up in a cheap cab along with barb

He would wear his "Dunwich Horror" class clownshirt with blazer. And of course his medalion

He would either ramble monotonously with "yep", "no", or simply stress sigh replies to questions, or tard rage all the way

He would react by awkwardly and creepily asking them if they would give him hankie pankie in return for an award

If he won he would smugly gloat and mock the damned trolls. If he lost he would burst into tears and rage for his creativity to be praised.

His acceptance speech would be an extended mix of advertising sonichu and furiously demanding no-one google him

Or in short, roughly 750% funnier than seth macfarline's performance this year
 
They reported on the news they caught a bunch of men trying to buy sex with an undercover agent.

What would happen if Chris got caught up in such a sordid affair?
 
Chris would be in full tomgirl attire, and thus confused for a grossly overweight middle aged prostitute with mental difficulties rather than someone trying to solicit, which causes the jerkops to be merciful and release him with a caution
 
I just saw, in my head, the scenario of tomgirl Chris trying to solicit from the undercover cop from South Park.
 
The cops would probably let Chris off, as they would be too busy laughing at his rock-bottomness to care.
 
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