pickleniggo said:
Meeko said:
then take him to the cleaners, assuming that he didn't run everyone off by this point.
Hopefully literally.
I think he'd probably be fairly clean. Chris is willing to do a lot for china, so I think that if he had a woman there that would deny him sex until after he had a shower, he'd clean himself every day. She'd have to nag him, though. She'd probably get frustrated and debate whether it was worth it, but would put up with everything for at least a year so she could say that "she tried" and then list the cleanliness problems as an issue in her divorce papers, saying that she tried but Chris wasn't investing himself in the relationship.
I think that he'd come out of it rather underwhelmed. I see it unfolding thusly:
Chris would invite Jackie to come with him to the reunion, as he wouldn't entirely want to go alone and his mother wouldn't be the first choice. Jackie would, of course, say no and Chris would bring his mother. So the evening would start with a level of disappointment, as Chris would potentially feel let down by this. Even if he goes by himself, Chris would still feel depressed that he didn't have a heartsweet with him.
At the reunion Chris would immediately seek out anyone he had contact with in high school and would assume that they all wanted desperately to see him. He'd of course seek out his gal pals, hoping to specially connect with them. Most, if not all, of them would have significant others, so he'd face disappointment with this. I think that part of him entertains this fantasy that he'd hook up with one of them. Overall I think that Chris would expect to find sympathetic ears in them as he regales them with his life of torment. Being decent human beings, they'd listen to him for a while and then eventually find reasons to drift around to everyone else. Some of them might be willing to exchange email addresses with him. I expect that Tiffany might be the one to do this, as she was the most sympathetic of all of them during high school. This would probably open up a whole new saga when he started delving into his tomgirl persona, as he identified her in the past as a tomboy.
Chris would then realize the reality of high school reunions: they're fairly dull and rather boring, especially if you don't have anything exciting to tell anyone else. He'd quickly grow bored and depressed that everyone else is paired off and that nobody really cares about his problems. If she's there, Barb would try to gain the attention of various people as well as try to ferret out any potential trolls. Which of course would be there somehow. Even if she didn't look, Chris would be looking as well. Finally he'd leave, a little sad and dejected, as he'd realize that this didn't even remotely live up to his expectations and that in the end, nobody really cares about high school once it's done.
On a side note, it'd be hilarious if the CWCki were to have financed part of the night and listed Chris as the sponsor somehow. Nothing nasty, just listing Chris's name or putting down "Sonichu Fan Club" or something that he would find flattering rather than insulting or trolling. This would lead Chris to put his own foot in his mouth, as he'd make sure to point out that "His Fans" love him or something to that extent. He'd embarrass himself in the process.
