"Where Have All the Good Men Gone?" - A married person looks at the current crisis of undateable men

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Women have been talking about the lack of good men on the market for about 20 years or so. It’s been the source of countless articles — college-educated men with jobs are harder to find than before. Heck, even blue-collar guys are being snapped up by women who outearn them.

Unfortunately, these articles only tell half the story. They’re looking at marriage from an economic perspective. And you know what? It’s true that most women want to have a man to financially contribute to their family since women will do the majority of the emotional labor at home.

Even so, the shortage of men in the dating world isn’t just an economic issue. Truth be told, the current economy has a lot of women rethinking their need to have a provider in the home. More and more frequently, women are open to being the breadwinner.

So, what’s the deal? Why are women struggling so hard to find a spouse? Economics aside, there are a couple of other reasons why women can’t find good men.

First off, there are some men who are choosing to drop out of the dating scene.​


Whether it’s because they were badly burnt and can’t risk it again, or they just got tired of trying doesn’t matter. A lot of men feel like there is nothing of value in dating or marrying anymore. It’s true.

To a point, I get it.

A lot of women treat men like shit. There’s also this weird current trend where being tall is basically the bare minimum for a large percentage of girls. (I don’t get this. I married someone shorter than me and get flak for it, but I like short men.) All things said, it’s easy to get disheartened with the scene.

Honestly, if a man says he doesn’t want to marry, that’s fine. He shouldn’t be forced to nor should women try to convince him. Personally, I think it’s empowering for men who have been burned to say, “Maybe I should stay single.”

I’m all for men going their own way, provided that they just stop trolling us online. It is healthier for guys to realize that they are not in a good state of mind for dating than it is to continue to try while they build toxic dynamics.

A lot of men who are economically ready for a family are also not emotionally ready.​


I’ll be honest. There’s something very, very wrong about a very sizable percentage of single men. While some single men are diamonds in the rough who just need the right girl, a lot of them are very…hateful.

Most women have received hate mail, harassment, and threats from men like these in their dating profile inboxes. They’ve also witnessed these guys pick apart their appearance, neg them, and abuse them.

This is not attractive. And it’s increasingly common from what I hear. Women talk, and that often means that women end up backing away from guys as a whole. But, that’s another issue.

What I’m saying is that men who treat women like shit and have zero self-awareness are not dateable. Many of these guys also don’t realize that a six-figure salary doesn’t guarantee you sex.

And sadly, there are more and more of them each day.

Of course, a lot of men who would have been married are also openly pursuing other men.​


In the past, not being a married man carried a MASSIVE stigma. The only stigma that was worse was being gay, bisexual, or trans as a man. In the 1960s, this is the type of stuff that would get you beaten and totally ostracized.

Hell, it still is, in many circles.

Things have still changed in much of the country. Nowadays, men don’t have to marry women just to keep up the look of a straight man. They can be openly gay. They also can marry their lovers.

While this does mean less eligible bachelors for women, this is actually a great thing. We should all have the right to date and marry who we are attracted to, regardless of gender.

The issue of male radicalization also has a serious impact on women’s standards.​


Incels. Nice Guys (TM). Misogynists. Online trolls. The list of men who hate women and who terrorize them goes on and on. And sadly, it’s all part of a bigger movement that’s radicalizing men to hate women.

Women are increasingly worried about men posing a life-threatening, life-ruining danger to them. So, what can they do? They have to protect themselves. So, they do one of three things:

  1. They drop out of the dating scene, deciding that it’s not worth the risk. It’s better to be alone than with the wrong man, and women know they’ll be blamed for “choosing poorly” if they end up abused.
  2. They vet men by pushing standards that are higher than what they were in the past and always keep a way to break up with them available. This means they may ask for standards that have nothing to do with compatibility.
  3. They choose to have cheap sex with someone and avoid relationships at all costs. They may even use a one-night-stand to get the sperm they need to have a baby.
Why am I bringing this up? Well, it’s simple. The higher dating standards become for men, the fewer men will qualify. This pushes guys who would be fine in another time out of the dating ring as a preventative measure.

Let’s look at the 6-foot standard that so many women want. It’s a perfect example of what I mean. This height thing is a symptom of what happens when women notice how many short guys have a chip on their shoulder about them being short.

A lot of short men insult women who won’t go out with them. If women have men berate them for not dating short men, they’re not going to go, “Maybe I should give the guy who just had a mantrum a chance.”

That’s not how women (or anyone logical) would work. No, they’re going to go, “I’ll opt for the tall dude because he’s not going to verbally abuse me for not dating someone shorter.”

Is this fair? Kinda, but it also sucks. A lot of great men I’ve met who would be amazing partners for the right girl are getting overlooked because of it. But once again, I understand. It’s an act of self-preservation these days.

So, what can be done?​


It all comes down to this: women have standards and they’re not willing to budge. Men have the right to determine what they want to do with that knowledge.

Dating is discriminatory by nature. Relationships of any sort are not a given. If men can’t measure up, it’s not up to women to act as charity cases or rehab centers. Men cannot force women to date them or marry them.

This means what men do is on them and will primarily be about how they react to the dating scene today. They can either drop out of the dating scene, work on their mental health, or do something to make themselves more attractive.

So, I suppose it’s time for them to decide what they want to do. Is the juice worth the squeeze? Are they willing to improve themselves?

Only time will tell.
 
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Only to lose it at the end. Must have skipped a dose.

I love that this is her ultimatum is in an article where amongst other things she's noted a height requirement is one of the standards some women expect men to achieve. "You know we want you taller men, do something with that knowledge!"
bone-lengthening surgery
hurray, intense pain for such little gain
Height seems to vary too much to reliably breed out shortness, too. Or rather, as you approach a new average, people will want an even taller average until you hit the limits of human health. I've seen families with a 18 inch spread of heights for the guys, from 7' to 5'6". Genes are weird like that. The 7'0 person had average height parents and the 6'5 people have kids that are 5'11.
It's true that as certain beauty standards become more stringing in a hyper-socialized dating world, more men will simply opt out of it, but as the article laments, it means more women wind up missing their shots, too. Coincidentally, the hottest woman I've ever known is a 5'11 woman married to a 5'1 guy, and they have children.
One of the more extreme guys on the manosphere side has rightfully pointed out all men would be wheelchair-bound giants if women got what they wanted in terms of breeding partner for all of our existence. Turns out the only benefit in being really tall is being imposing and having a slight, albeit negligible, advantage in physical encounters, of which are obsolete thanks to guns.
 
Oh Jesus Fuck a "Medium Article". A woke site with a article written by some woke person.

Well All I can say is the following and I am pointing this direction to the women in Generation Fail and Generation SELLOUT, and even the Jones Generation that I had to continually deal with until lately. Yea it's personal. It's things like this that shapes people's viewpoints of people and of life in general. So...

I have fucking nothing but distain of your fucking ideology of " What makes a good man".

When you are young you wanted "The Bay Boy Image".
When you got a little older you wanted "Tall Handsome man that makes money".
When you got older you wanted. "A man that makes REAL money".

So when I started dating, You said, " You do not have that Bad Boy image".
So when I started to make money, You said, "You're not a Tall (be close to 6ft.) Handsome man".
So when I started to make REAL money, You said, "Well you got the MONEY honey".
So my reply to that was...

"Well Fuck You bitch, Fuck You".

I had to go through this mother fucking nonsense throughout my life. I've dated some incredibly beautiful women but now you know they were only dates. Later in life when I started making real money , it was so bad seeing this shit in Silicon Valleyland, Silicon Sacramento, the LA region. So bad it got to the point where I simply could not care less about having a relationship. Too many god damn shallow and fake people. Just fuck you all.

Need sex? High end Escort service. Bang some Bitches, toss a few grand and use them as a sperm receptacles. They know what they got, I know what I paid for. I Don't have to deal with devious bitches with claws for your money. That's my opinion of course.

I'm now an old man... and to this day I keep getting propositioned by hard up women who know that they have NOTHING but their ever so fleeting looks. They wasted their life and now they want easy street for their mistakes. I'm too old and too tired for their game and I just don't care.

It is those types of women that made it hard for dating for honest men for 40+ god damned years. This illusion is also part of the billion dollar industry of "everything that supposed to make the ideal woman" for a man. This is GETTING WORSE now because of the economy. They have no... MONEY AND/OR NO ONE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM.

The entire lies that I had to deal with all races was just sickening. It's your own damn fault you can't find a good man. You own Damn fault. YOU made the ground rules, you can eat your own shit now.

A good honest woman is hard to find these days. I don't fucking care if she looked like a small Yeti. If that person is honest with me and will go through LIFE together for the GOOD and the BAD.... well the sign me up. We only have a few years left so lets go and trip the light fantastic and make what's left of life last!

That is my attitude concerning this AND I have got back at a few women who tried to play with my feelings. Mainly living the good life and knowing that they fucked up. As well as "sorting things out".

So get off your god damn pedestal and start looking around for REAL men... NOT these punk as WEAK men of today, that in a way IT IS YOUR FAULT that they became beta boys... NO... you need to find the REAL men who are just every day people with every day problem that want to share your life with them.

There's plenty of them out there so STOP with your bullshit about what the Ideal man is about because THEY DO NOT EXIST. SO get out there and rethink about what is exactly what is a relationship is about.


Another thing which is just as important.

1. BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN DEEP.
You have only a few short years of fleeting youth and if you are going to rely on just that, your life is already over.
2. UGLINESS IS TO THE BONE.
There is more to life than just good looks. You have to have a good personality to find the right person for you. If you don't have it you are FUCKED.

3. OLD AGE IS THE EQUALIZER. Everyone gets old, youthful beauty goes away. Everything sags, slows down and starts to hurt. If you are a an arrogant, evil bitch when you are young, from experience, nobody will want you when you are old. If you are that fake with your life, then it's already over for you. Just go die in a corner somewhere. Nobody will miss you.


I GOT LUCKY. REAL LUCKY at my age... As if God took a little pity on my life and placed her in front of me. There is a real love story about this that is so incredible that you just can not make it up in the movies. Only the closest few know on what happened to us. Perhaps I'll write about it before my time is up. Anyhow....

I was completely done with the dating scene. I got sick and tired of women just wanting, to put it bluntly a sugar daddy to take care of them. Did not matter how young or old they were, once they found out that I had "mucho dinero" I became cold. Extremely cold. The type of coldness that's perfect in certain types of businesses when you have to do what you have to do to get "the job done", without feeling or remorse.

And then one day literally out of the blue. Someone just walked into my life. To be my wife. She's really average in looks and around my age, but her warm personality showed through with her simple smile. It was her honesty and personality that won me over to try one more time.

She did not want nothing from me except just to be with me. We found out we needed each other because we both came from and/or were in some very bad situations that needed to be "sorted out"

They got "Sorted Out".

It's great to have someone later in life just to have her make the usual noise around the house. If you have someone you care about you know the feeling when your partner leaves the house for a few hours. It gets a little bit quiet and you will feel that ever so tinge of loneliness. And when your partner comes back from her outing you feel just a bit better than before. Yea I mess her when I have to leave town and happy when I get back.

That is what a long term relationship/marriage is all about.

When I look at todays trends, I just shake my head and say I am thankful to find someone that took me for "Who I Am" and not "How I Look" or "How many $$$ signs in my bank accounts".

However for those average guys which is about 80% of us, there are good women out there that are not fucked up in the head that have not bought in to what society dictates today. Just keep looking and good luck with your search.

NOTE: In the Crack Head 80's spilling into the way out 90's Mucho Dinero had a special meaning Akin to the businessman's choice of drink.... Crank And Champaign. Ahhh yesss the Miami Vice like days of way back then...

 
Heck, even blue-collar guys are being snapped up by women who outearn them.
The divorce rate for couples where the man earns less is higher than the standard 50% divorce rate in the US, of course overwhelming filed by women.
I’m all for men going their own way
No you're not. You wouldn't be writing articles telling men to "man up" and whining about "where are all the good men?"
While this does mean less eligible bachelors for women, this is actually a great thing.
No its not. Women have an ingrained desire and biological imperative for safety and security, which is why they also vote for socialism/communism. We're already seeing the mental health crisis in millennial women in their 30s who are realizing that 35-65 is a long time to be a careerist with no family to fall back on.

Reality is more and more men become red pilled about female nature, society and its laws. That is enough to overcome our 10x sex drive to find a woman. That is astounding. If you think that's going to change by writing articles attacking men, then just keep living in your fantasy land where unicorns fart rainbows.
 
Let's not leave out the relentless attempts to mold men into some strange form that liberal women enjoy.

Kid acts up? Drug him.
Kid reacts to a bully by punching him? Suspend him.

Oh yeah, let's not forget: Kid busts his ass to get good grades? Watches as nignog student gets same grade.

I can't IMAGINE how that might damage things. (/sarc)
 
Let's not leave out the relentless attempts to mold men into some strange form that liberal women enjoy.

Kid acts up? Drug him.
Kid reacts to a bully by punching him? Suspend him.

Oh yeah, let's not forget: Kid busts his ass to get good grades? Watches as nignog student gets same grade.

I can't IMAGINE how that might damage things. (/sarc)
As the late Kevin Samuels once said, women want a good man like Will Smith and for him to fuck like Tupac.
it's impossible and they're in complete denial about it

They treat boys like defective girls because they never have to solve problems themselves or deal with them, ever. You're dealing with something? Have a good cry about it. Solve the problem? Maybe the problems you and your need to solve problems? Wow, that sucks. Can you just shut up about it now? You're making me do emotional labor.
god, i fucking wish i was attacking a strawman
 
As the late Kevin Samuels once said, women want a good man like Will Smith and for him to fuck like Tupac.
it's impossible and they're in complete denial about it
It's even worse than that.

It's clear that Jada, and even their two kids, don't even respect Will.

That's why a lot of men are becoming "red pilled." Even when they are exactly the types of men that women say they want, women don't respect them because they are "weak." Tupac isn't weak, but Tupac also isn't going to wife Jada up. In fact, it's arguable that Jada is attacted to Tupac BECAUSE he won't wife her up. It's all about the chase; one she has the validation, she loses interest. I've seen a lot of men talk about how a woman persued them for a year, and then when they finally relented, the woman lost interest. That's because the woman got the validation she wanted.

It's also like how children don't want a toy until they see a sibling playing with it. Men can go months/years without a woman, and suddenly when they luck into one then women are all over him. That's because now he's more attactive. There's also a component of jealously among the women; they see a woman "whose beneath them" with a man, and think that they can get that man because OBVIOUSLY they are a better woman than this current girlfriend. I have literally seen woman on social media talk about how they don't want a man that "doesn't have any hoes" because they think to themselves if noone else wants this man, then why would I want him? Men are a status symbol to women.

That doesn't get into the fact that women would rather be Nick Cannon's tenth baby momma than have a "7" man all to themselves, but that's getting into a whole nother can of worms.

Weakness is so important, especially in the black community, that black women will break up with their boyfriends for crying at a funeral. I know this happens too in non-black communities, but my impression is that it is worse for black men. Black men can't even cry at a parent's funeral without their women losing respect for them.

The most extreme example for right or wrong is male feminists. Some are just straight predators (start the clock), but some are literally just beta males that are saying "look, I want a relationship and will do whatever you ask of me to get it." Then, when these men do everything the feminist women say they want, they find out that the feminists don't find that attractive in an actual partner; they still want the "bad boy." That pisses off the male feminists because in their mind, they are doing everything "right", they are doing everything the women ask of them, and still get no results.

I just noticed that this is a lot. Is this too much? Sometimes I like to vent, or at least use posts to get my thoughts together. I know in the real world I would be called an incel for this post. Probably here too. And niggerfaggot.
 
As a proportedly "datable" single guy let me give some comments

Women have been talking about the lack of good men on the market for about 20 years or so. It’s been the source of countless articles — college-educated men with jobs are harder to find than before. Heck, even blue-collar guys are being snapped up by women who outearn them.
Okay so, instantly "College-Educated" and "Men with lower earning potential" are considered "bad"

Why? If you are an Average to Above Average earner if you are cutting out any man who makes less than you, you are instantly cutting out half of the potential mates. This is supposed to be about finding a good man who will love you not finding a sugar daddy.

First off, there are some men who are choosing to drop out of the dating scene.​

Why could this ever fucking be? Why would men drop out of the dating scene

WAHMEN.jpg

I mean just look at this random woman, she looks like such a great partner, she won't try to break my hand with a bottle of booze and fucking shit in my bed on a Drunked BPD filled bout of insanity and then blame me for it on twitter at all. I am entirely sure that if I allowed my job to actually promote me and make me full time that every night when I return home from work I will have a hot meal awaiting me.

Spoilers: I will find her fucking a dog more often than not.

Of course that is presuming that she doesn't have a litter of mouths to feed, because that is something that women think they are entitled to these days. I should raise a linage of children that are not my DNA. It is such a sexy thing to know that I have to buy into somebody else's children in order to have a chance at continuing my DNA line, just doubling or Tripling those costs is no big deal at all.

A lot of men feel like there is nothing of value in dating or marrying anymore. It’s true.

To a point, I get it.

A lot of women treat men like shit.
Yeah, and maybe just maybe if you braindead cunts want to adjust a man's POV of this you need to stop treating them like shit.

Don't get it..to a point, get it entirely and realize that if you want a husband you kind of need to earn it. Especially in this day and age.

He shouldn’t be forced to nor should women try to convince him.
Yes, yes they should you fucking coward, if you are attracted to a man you should attempt to convince him you are worth his time. That is how this dating shit works.

I’m all for men going their own way, provided that they just stop trolling us online. It is healthier for guys to realize that they are not in a good state of mind for dating than it is to continue to try while they build toxic dynamics.

A lot of men who are economically ready for a family are also not emotionally ready.​


I’ll be honest. There’s something very, very wrong about a very sizable percentage of single men. While some single men are diamonds in the rough who just need the right girl, a lot of them are very…hateful.

Most women have received hate mail, harassment, and threats from men like these in their dating profile inboxes. They’ve also witnessed these guys pick apart their appearance, neg them, and abuse them.

This is not attractive. And it’s increasingly common from what I hear.
Men think that the system is broken, women most affected.

Many of these guys also don’t realize that a six-figure salary doesn’t guarantee you sex.
Hmm :thinking:
It’s been the source of countless articles — college-educated men with jobs are harder to find than before. Heck, even blue-collar guys are being snapped up by women who outearn them.
HMMMMM

Where could men have ever gotten the idea that more money = easier to get sex.

Of course, a lot of men who would have been married are also openly pursuing other men.​

Faggots are stealing all the good men dot cope

The issue of male radicalization also has a serious impact on women’s standards.​


Incels. Nice Guys (TM). Misogynists. Online trolls.
Why the fuck are you looking for love on Twitter and Youtube Comments? You realize that "ONLINE TROLLS" are like .01% of guys right? you realize Social Media isn't the real world and that only 10% of people on the planet use it and only 10% of them use it seriously and that the vast majority of those people don't even seriously use it.

Why am I bringing this up? Well, it’s simple. The higher dating standards become for men, the fewer men will qualify. This pushes guys who would be fine in another time out of the dating ring as a preventative measure.
SHOCKED.png
THE HELL YOU SAY?

Maybe if you histrionic fucking journalists wouldn't splash "MEN ARE AN EVIL THREAT TO WOMEN" on the top of every other fucking headline Women might not be terrorized to the point where they think that every single man they meet is going to rape them and turn them into a Handmaids Tale slave the first chance they get.

It all comes down to this: women have standards and they’re not willing to budge. Men have the right to determine what they want to do with that knowledge.
STEP UP YOUR GAME MEN, you all have to be 80 hour workers, who take care of everything at home, never show any weakness but somehow come off as vulnerable, while keeping the perfect body and somehow all being 6 foot tall and willing to be a stepdad for a Nigger Kid and a Spic Kid because your wife took it in the vag when she was 20.

Dating is discriminatory by nature. Relationships of any sort are not a given. If men can’t measure up, it’s not up to women to act as charity cases or rehab centers. Men cannot force women to date them or marry them.
Yes it is, unless you are a man who says no to a Sheboon, or a Fatty or a Troon...or any woman at all for that matter.

They can either drop out of the dating scene, work on their mental health, or do something to make themselves more attractive.
Where did all the good men go? THEY DON'T EXIST ANYMORE GIRLS THEY ARE ALL INCEL ONLINE TROLLS WHO AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR US QUEENS.

This is getting dangerously close to some self-awareness.
@Flexo Nah, this is deadly levels of fucking Cope.
 
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