why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

[Falcos_Commisar]

I've lost faith in the notion that guys want to exit the dating game as much as I do. So, now, if a guy is interested, the ground rules are: 1, back off if you're not looking for marriage and 2. no sex for 90 days. I'll introduce the second one gently, but these motherfuckers are going to have to learn how to slow their rolls.

Hehe I have a strange feeling there are multiple men you've fucked on the first date or did something sexual with..... Why did they get it asap and now others have to wait?

Not sure. I ask women out on dates, most of them say no, a few of them say yes, and then the ones who say yes stand me up and ghost me.

Shit sucks.

Ouch. If they're gonna ghost they should just say no and save everyone the trouble

It's interesting to spot the pattern in this thread. Many people (men and women) that list a long ass laundry list of things they need in their sweetheart from the ground up.

That approach is an autistic misunderstanding of how relationships work. People change during all of their lives, and evolve together. Not saying one shouldn't have integrity, but don't be set in stone either.

For example, I share few political values with my gf. Who cares? Fuck politics. I can't think of anything more pussy drying and dick shrinking than a couple debating each other about some current year nothingburger.

Yep, the "PERFECT BG/GF CHECKLIST" is terrible. How about attractive physically and not a screeching asshole?

That's all you really need tbh

Plenty of men have managed to exit the dating game. They just don't bother to play it any more. I, for one, welcome our new AI Sex Robots.

Dating is like thermodynamics with one important variation.

1. You can't win.
2. You can't break even.
3. But you can quit the game.

So true. Dudes are just checking out.

Like, just point me in the direction of where well-adjusted adults are looking for a serious relationship and I'll be there all the time.

They're all married or in committed long term relationships. You missed the boat.

There's sort of a perception that good sex can magically fix anything.

It can paper over issues for a bit but eventually it's not enough anymore.

Fwiw I've noticed that women will keep coming back to toxic men/relationships for sex more than men.

If I may give some advice, you should keep your X number of days for yourself, but just tell the guy that you won’t have sex with him until you feel it’s going somewhere/could be serious

Ways to get ghosted by men, see above.

I did find a suitable candidate for an LTR and she did the "Holding the pussy ransom until she deemed me worthy" thing. Now, while she thought I was being a "good boi" and "waiting" I was still getting regular sex from my hookup gals. I'm not in a serious relationship unless I'm sleeping with a woman but there's a goldilocks zone of not being too easy and thinking I'm going to be a simp good boi waiting for reward sex. I don't live with you, you don't control what I do as someone who I'm not actually in a relationship with. I'll answer your texts, take you on dates outside of that "I'm busy right now". You play games, I'll play the game

Ahaha excellent situation. She thought you were your ONLY option

Typically I see this with career women. Where the longer they wait, the higher their standards are to justify a payoff for the length of time they didn't have a relationship. "It's not that no man wants to date me, it's that the ones that are interested don't meet my standards" which inevitably leads to cats and wine.

Ohh yes. Especially late 20s early 30s. They're making good money, maybe have their own home and your ass has better be Prince Charming with an active gym membership and the ability to take her on a jet to exciting locations on the double.

Then of course the cats and box wine arrive

If you're in your 20s with some money in the bank, a decent condo and a car that isn't a shitbox you're golden, the standards are way lower. If you don't own a house, a near-premium car and make over 3 figures by your 30s you're practically a loser on a sisyphean struggle, and odds are if you didn't have the aforementioned things in your 20s you are not gonna have the other stuff in your 30s either.

Practically all 30yo women I've met are into doing retarded shit tests which no self-respecting men of that age are willing to do anymore, except of course the very predators they think they'll filter with that crap. If you go on dating apps in a city all you get are mentally ill catladies. If you go to a small town or rural area its all broke single moms.

As for me personally I was way more interested in marriage and settling down in my 20s than I am in my 30s. Living alone rocks, you don't really get it until you've been away from your parents for a while then go back to visit and realize how much it sucked to not have your own living room, your own fridge, your own bathroom (unless you were a rich kid), etc...

Plus you're dumb and gullible as hell when you're a man in your early 20s. People like to say young women are like this but young men at that age have zero experience, they know nothing about divorce laws. Now in my 30s I've seen a lot of bad things happen to other men, many of my friends and male cousins are divorced and it wasn't nice for any of them, one buddy even had a small factory, a house and an apartment in the city. Now he's back to being a tradie living out in the sticks when he's in his mid 40s, ngmi.

Fucking hell you're right. Young people are kinda dumb and rush into things.

Genuine autism. I'm in my late 20s and still just as clueless about dating as I was in high school. Which sucks because I found a great girl: homebody, weeb, Asian, game dev, low maintance, aka the perfect woman. We had a casual date at the mall that went well and I think I talked her into watching RoboCop at my place but still haven't solidified the date yet. We last talked Sunday, I left her alone Monday and I think I will text her Tuesday evening and make the plans. Any and all advice would be helpful.

My nigga, keep up the good work.

Text tomorrow or even better, call on the phone. Keep up the communication and in person activities and you're probably golden.

Don't overthink it and for the love of GOD don't whip your dick out during RoboCop. Save that for after the movie if it seems right.

 

[FILTH Tourist]

Seeing as you're a genuine autist and she's a "homebody, weeb, Asian, game dev, low maintance", the most critical piece of advice I'd give would be to make sure it's not a troon.

Well her name isn't Lilith and she isn't wearing a choker, so I think I'm in the clear.

I hope the date works out and you both have a great time!

Thanks for the advice, friend!

Don't overthink it and for the love of GOD don't whip your dick out during RoboCop.

I'll try my best!

 

[Kel1 shi1]

What will the woman who wants a relationship with you need to do to be acceptable?

It’s a low bar, don’t be fat, mental or lazy. (Give me those rainbows Kiwis)

 

[Michael Wade]

It’s a low bar, don’t be fat, mental or lazy. (Give me those rainbows Kiwis)

Have a job and be relatively self sufficient.

 

[cybertoaster]

but these are increasingly single girls in their 20s, and wealthier slightly older women, going broke just to have a guy pay attention to them and act like their boyfriend.
Not only aren't these girls materially gaining, they're actually paying other people for companionship.

That's a Japan thing, it might be the situation here 20 years from now but AFAIK there are no male hostess clubs here in America, but you do have the female equivalent, has been there since early last century at least.

Also, if these guys in their 20s are the ones who have it made in terms of dating, how is it that males in their 20s are single at almost twice the rate of women in the same age range?

That was the situation in my 20s, I'm in my 30s bro, but yeah I'm aware its far worse now since over 30% of males 18 to 25 are not getting any, let alone an actual steady girlfriend.

And I never said we had it made, just that if you think dating in your 30s is gonna be an easy ride because all women are desperate you're in for a rough landing, specially since I've no idea how insane zoomer women will be in their 30s giving their current mental health.

I don't buy the blackpill

Not a blackpill, a blackpill is saying the jews are keeping you down while tyrone is fucking all the girls. In reality the jew population is going down fast due to similar factors and black men are having even more issues getting into a relationship. Consider that they are the ones that started the incel current movement (not the term) and the passport bros thing.

there are plenty of single women who are willing to tolerate a remarkable amount of nonsense so long as someone is able to meet their emotional needs.

Tell me about it, I'm a magnet for crazy girls, been so all my life, not really "I can save her" or "captain save a hoe" since I was never a walking wallet for them, but I did stick around longer than I should because I felt bad for them.

And yeah "emotional needs", to make it short and so zoomers can understand me I been with both tsunderes (bipolar with daddy issues) and yanderes (psychotics and cutters). Its not as fun as in your chinese cartoons, specially not for my car...

I suspect that a lot of men are themselves fixated on insecurity about their age/income/whatever

I can understand that because now even a mid chick has this list of insane requirements to date her on social media. IDK when I was in my 20s saying you would only date the top 5% of the male population (in terms of physical characteristics and wealth) was a big nono, like sure women could not choose a guy that didn't met those standards but they didn't say it out loud, plus other womens would openly call out their bullshit rather than go "yaaas kween!" when they get their 5th cat...

Any and all advice would be helpful.

Is she living with you?

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

Dating in your 30s sucks big time, don't listen to the incel cope, women are not desperate at all, in fact despite most being clearly past their primer they are waaaaaaay more picky now. If you're in your 20s with some money in the bank, a decent condo and a car that isn't a shitbox you're golden, the standards are way lower. If you don't own a house, a near-premium car and make over 3 figures by your 30s you're practically a loser on a sisyphean struggle, and odds are if you didn't have the aforementioned things in your 20s you are not gonna have the other stuff in your 30s either.

Its sucks because women see through your shit and they want to settle not to be forever girlfriends, wait til your 40s . You think this is bad wait until people start giving you side eye for being that creepy uncle who never married, doesn't have kids etc. i would recommend to consider faggotry and Grindr

It's kinda crazy watching the nuances of single-parent dating from the outside looking in. Using a family member as an example, he was a single parent, who married another single parent. Or rather widow. That's how I found out that a handful of women don't want to raise some other woman's kid either

I think the issues is more with the fact that the mom is histrionic cunt and the drama and issues it brings. Also moms like that fuck up the kids and make them unparentable little shits .
There are plenty of women even childless ones who are ok with someone's elses kid as long as the mom and the kid are ok and drama free .

 

[CognitiveDeficiency]

I am profoundly ugly and I developed a lot of insecurities and complexes about it when I was a child. This lead me to never even try to seek love until I was old enough to recognize those complexes and work through them. Unfortunately by the time I had done so it was far too late to find someone to love and start a family with. I have accepted that I will die alone, made peace with it, and just try to keep myself busy with hobbies and jobs in the hopes that I can be financially secure enough to peacefully sunset and leave something for my nephews and nieces to hopefully have a happier life than I did.

 

[Ibanez RG 350EX]

You think this is bad wait until people start giving you side eye for being that creepy uncle who never married

Imagine making a life choice as consequential and far-reaching as getting married just to get the approval of others who think it's "creepy" not to. What a boring thing to get tangled up in knots over.

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

Imagine making a life choice as consequential and far-reaching as getting married just to get the approval of others who think it's "creepy" not to. What a boring thing to get tangled up in knots over.

Imagine reading this post and getting up in arms mentioning marriage or sort out your relationships . Marriage as of current year is only consequential if you have net worth more than 100k . Most you don't have net worth of 0. ( And btw net worth is stuff you own worth minus your debts)

 

[cybertoaster]

Its sucks because women see through your shit and they want to settle not to be forever girlfriends, wait til your 40s . You think this is bad wait until people start giving you side eye for being that creepy uncle who never married, doesn't have kids etc. i would recommend to consider faggotry and Grindr

Jesus christ the SEETHE coming from this lame ass post, I hate that shitty "who hurt you" phrase but it totally applies here.

Anyway, I do know why YOU are single.

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

Jesus christ the SEETHE coming from this lame ass post, I hate that shitty "who hurt you" phrase but it totally applies here.

Anyway, I do know why YOU are single.

. Yawn . You forget the cats and boxed wine.

Every fucking time. Be my guest ride that carousel into the ground like every other milenial.

 

[Ibanez RG 350EX]

Marriage as of current year is only consequential if you have net worth more than 100k . Most you don't have net worth of 0.

It's really weird to believe that the financial aspect is where the problems of marriage begin and end. A bad marriage can fuck up your life even if you go into it with a negative net worth.

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

It's really weird to believe that the financial aspect is where the problems of marriage begin and end. A bad marriage can fuck up your life even if you go into it with a negative net worth.

Isn't all the men complaining about " half of my shit ree" what else could be so terrible that you should act like it's the hardest thing to do?

I am genuinely listening. Because this is new to me.

 

[Ibanez RG 350EX]

I am genuinely listening.

I don't think you are. I think it's extraordinarily unlikely that you're somehow unaware that it's a real, real big problem to legally bind yourself to a person who can make your life a living hell in a hundred ways, even if finances are completely discounted.

I think it's far more likely you just have some weird axe to grind.

 

[Michael Wade]

It's really weird to believe that the financial aspect is where the problems of marriage begin and end. A bad marriage can fuck up your life even if you go into it with a negative net worth.

It is odd. Apparently most guys are not comfortable with making less then the wife or something?

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

I don't think you are. I think it's extraordinarily unlikely that you're somehow unaware that it's a real, real big problem to legally bind yourself to a person who can make your life a living hell in a hundred ways, even if finances are completely discounted.

I think it's far more likely you just have some weird axe to grind.

You need to explain to me how ? We are talking USA and the west right now. Your life might be made hell more likely in custody battles and if you have adversial parent who can drag you in the courts until your kids are 18 . But thats it

You just being vague now .

 

[FILTH Tourist]

Is she living with you?

No we just met and been on one date, but things seem to be going good. My problem is that things quickly fall apart after the first date and I don't want to fuck it up.

 

[Kel1 shi1]

Ahaha excellent situation. She thought you were your ONLY option

Women will take advantage of that belief as well. Say you have a regular casual hookup woman and she calls you up to take her out, you think no problem I'll get sex at the end like we always do. So you wine and dine taker her back to your place only to be hit with "Sorry I'm on my period".

Bitch you knew that from the second you called me, kept it quiet all day because you knew damn well I'd have not taken you out. Not that she knows I had options I could have spent the day with instead. Anyway once this happens more than once with different woman you work out that this is a thing they do on purpose.

I learned this and adapted so they only ever get to pull it on me once. Got an app that tracks fertility, plug the date into that and it will tell me every month for the next year when it's rag week so I know to avoid them for that week "I'm busy" take someone else out or stay home and save my money.

 

[Kel1 shi1]

Any and all advice would be helpful.

Yup, that's some autism. what you've done so far is making a friend. I've dated a lot of Asians, although its actually a wide demographic depending on where her family is from so do your research. Do exactly this, call her and ask for a date. Specifically I'd like to take you on a date to do "X" activity at "time and day". In my experience you get a direct YES/NO response from Asian women.

Not watching Robocop you bellend. Take her to a park, beach, walk a trail, theme park if she's nerdy an arcade even, then after said activity take her to a restaurant (not an Asian one) mid priced, not a cheap chain or a high end one. Next take her to a coffee shop, ice cream parlor some light snack type place. Finally you invite her back to your place (Make sure you've cleaned it up, fresh sheets on the bed, clean the bathroom) but don't do it in a nudge nudge wink wink innuendo way. If she goes to your place the magic will happen, if she does not go it's not an automatic fail.

Just set up another date and repeat the process.

 

[Rekeita's Kidneys]

There is probably a few kiwi's on here with fucked up enough lives that they shouldn't even be considering dating atm. Unfortunately myself included.

Witnessing friends enter relationships when they were/are deeply troubled themselves just led to more misery and drama than it was worth.