why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

[Ravier Xavenblood]

I'm neurodiverse and I have specific needs. I choose to be single to spare others

What specific needs?
I've had plenty of encounters with unwell women and am now dating one with tolerable issues. Not saying it's easy but there's probably someone out there who could handle you.

 

[Asterism]

What specific needs?
I've had plenty of encounters with unwell women and am now dating one with tolerable issues. Not saying it's easy but there's probably someone out there who could handle you.

I have big emotional regulation issues. PTSD, Bipolar 2, depression, panic disorder, psychosis as well (all diagnosed) as well as ADHD type 1.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

I have big emotional regulation issues. PTSD, Bipolar 2, depression, panic disorder, psychosis as well (all diagnosed)

At least you're self aware of it all. Even a couple disorders can be a lot for a bf/gf to handle.

 

[Local Fed]

I have big emotional regulation issues. PTSD, Bipolar 2, depression, panic disorder, psychosis as well (all diagnosed)

Have you tried unplugging and then plugging yourself back in?

 

[Asterism]

At least you're self aware of it all. Even a couple disorders can be a lot for a bf/gf to handle.

Thank you very much. I agree. I have a lot of self work to do.

 

[George Lucas]

I recently had an epiphany about modern dating and how to avoid its pitfalls. Not sure how great it is, but I keep seeing young people sperg about how terrible online dating is and how there’s no other option.

Typical coom-brained dating strategy:
1. Meet lots of girls, whether it’s at a bar, parties, online, DM sliding, etc.
2. Get laid a lot. Very few relationships.
3. Get tired / burnt out. Marry whoever the current prospect is who is probably a bad choice because you met through a terrible venue, or not even get to this point and keep searching in vain forever.

Better approach:
1. Literally just wait
2. Be present at functions where singles congregate but isn’t a dating-focused place
3. Focus on people who aren’t coom-brained / aren’t terminally online / are basically doing the same approach as this
4. It will take a lot longer to find someone but you’ll have a lot more energy and enthusiasm to form a good relationship, plus it’s already more likely that’ll you relate.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

This sounds like cope, men's loneliness is different than women's. They are alone because their options are not up to their surreal standards, not because they were autistic invisible schizos their whole life. lol

What I mean is this -
Women all go after the top 10% of men. When they are young they all take turns fucking and dating the alpha males. When they hit the wall somewhere past the age of 35-40 they suddenly have to play some kind of musical chairs, they all race to put a ring on the finger of any Chad they can find. But of course there are only so many alpha males to go around so a lot of women have to settle for a beta that has a house and money. Well, if we have all walked away from society they won't have the option of using us for financial security.

@Party Hat Wurmple Are you talking about going for Eurogirls or going for another race? If you go for another race then how do you get past all the racial differences, and the fact that everyone they know lives in another country other than you? For sure though western women are the most stuck up entitled little queens on the planet.

 

[Falcos_Commisar]

On of the main traps I fell into way too often. But my luck has flipped this year and I am a lot more confident. Should I just do some light touching or something?

Also movie night is confirmed for this Sunday!

And?!??! Hope it went well.

Bruh just go irl meet ups . Bumble has some of them , do you have any hobbies?

https://bumble.com/en/the-buzz/events

https://www.meetup.com/

https://bumble.com/en/the-buzz/irl-singles-events

believe it or not some niche hobbies and groups have meetup groups on facebook .

Just try to make friends instead of flirting

edit : dm me if you need more help or you dont find any events nearby then we need to change strategies but you might need to pl.

IMHO Bumble is tinder with the hilarity of making women attempt an opening line.

Meetup if fine although most meetups are going to be majority men unless it's knitting in which case it's old ladies

at this point? Just terrible fucking luck it seems. Last two gf's, both considered potential wife material at first. Both, a few months in, started displaying unacceptable levels of gaslighting and other related bullshit. Hard for them to successfully pull that off when I have a rule to never delete texts.

Hopefully this is rock bottom and the Sun, being born again in this eclipse, has seen this bullshit and had enough. Cause thats really my only shot at this point.

Ouch man, but you dodged bullets

Hell, a girl I took out 3x last year married some doofus she met off Hinge after knowing him for ~1 month. Now she's texting me saying how awful it is, how his family is awful to her and how she's SoL as she lost her student visa and can't work or do anything but sit at home for 2-3 months until her papers arrive.

She'll be in my area in 2 months.... Maybe I'll try for some horizontal therapy

You just need to talk to people. Start conversations and make friends. FFS it's not that hard.


What are you talking about? Chicks flock to band dudes all the time. They love to bang them. They'll bend over backwards for a cute guitar or vocalist in a band. They bang artists too. They just don't like dating them. They like the hobby, but they hate it taking away your time. They like your hobby, but they hate it doesn't make you more money. When they insist you quit and get a job, they're mad you change and dump you. It's hilarious.

Personally, I hate the starving artist/creative types and my favorite thing about those people is when they starve to death. But that's just me. So I think this cycle is fucking great.

Band dudes, certain types of photographers and a few other artists get mega chicks.

Others get.... Zero.

Beware of the born-again virgin "churchgirl", she will always be the town bike

Ohh YES. Makes you wait till the wedding night for sex yet she happily fucked every other dude on the first date (maybe the third of she was being extra slow)

Bonus points of she has a kid or three and no wedding ring....

Extra mega bonus points when she demands that you be a Hallmark movie hero character with lots of cash too while she's getting chubby/fat

 

[FILTH Tourist]

And?!??! Hope it went well.

I think so, the screening room in my building had a strict no food or drink policy, so we went to the movie theater, then we strolled though the park, went though a museum, and got some curry for dinner. We were enjoying ourselves and some light flirting. I ended it with a hug because by the time we parted ways. Mainly because are hands were full at the time, i was feeling a sickness coming on and I got nervous. But with Taiwanese girls you tend to be a little slower and a hug is a good sign because that is seen as romantic over here. We have another date in a few weeks because we are both busy next weekend. I'm going to propose a dinner date at my place and cook her something.

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

I have big emotional regulation issues. PTSD, Bipolar 2, depression, panic disorder, psychosis as well (all diagnosed) as well as ADHD type 1.

Eh, you seem sane to me. I can fix her!!

I recently had an epiphany about modern dating and how to avoid its pitfalls. Not sure how great it is, but I keep seeing young people sperg about how terrible online dating is and how there’s no other option.

You're implying people not like this exist. Unfortunately for your assessment it's contradictory to female nature. Female nature wants women to feel like they're winning a prize. If they don't feel like they're winning a prize by dating you, then they're not interested in giving you love. You aren't a prize unless other women want you. I'm sorry, but that's reality. It's a completely unconscious thing that happens.

Are you talking about going for Eurogirls or going for another race? If you go for another race then how do you get past all the racial differences, and the fact that everyone they know lives in another country other than you? For sure though western women are the most stuck up entitled little queens on the planet

You find ways around it. But honestly, in my experience even most Euro-chicks are better than Burgerwomen. American women have just become that truly awful.

 

[peepoopeepoo]

What I mean is this -
Women all go after the top 10% of men. When they are young they all take turns fucking and dating the alpha males. When they hit the wall somewhere past the age of 35-40 they suddenly have to play some kind of musical chairs, they all race to put a ring on the finger of any Chad they can find. But of course there are only so many alpha males to go around so a lot of women have to settle for a beta that has a house and money. Well, if we have all walked away from society they won't have the option of using us for financial security.

I do get your point. But I still think there is no wall, women will always have options, options that are reduced in quality, but that's it.

Financial security will still come from taxation and the state redistributing wealth through social programs.

 

[George Lucas]

You're implying people not like this exist. Unfortunately for your assessment it's contradictory to female nature. Female nature wants women to feel like they're winning a prize. If they don't feel like they're winning a prize by dating you, then they're not interested in giving you love. You aren't a prize unless other women want you. I'm sorry, but that's reality. It's a completely unconscious thing that happens.

What do you mean? Lots of people don’t use online dating or any kind of social media.

 

[Kel1 shi1]

You aren't a prize unless other women want you. I'm sorry, but that's reality. It's a completely unconscious thing that happens.

As a single guy, normal not chad, no women are interested in you. Until you get a girlfriend and women that ignored you suddenly give you more attention especially if she's more attractive. I've had this discussion with men before and they agree and based on our man logic it's because women want what they can't have. Although it might be more nuanced than that.

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

What do you mean? Lots of people don’t use online dating or any kind of social media.

Not using online dating and social media is fine. But it's in women's nature to feel like they're winning a grand prize by dating you. If no other women want you, they won't be interested in you. It's not a coincidence that women dm you the moment you're in a relationship. It's not a coincidence that when more attractive women hang around you, more talk to you. So just waiting and avoiding women doesn't really accomplish your goal.

As a single guy, normal not chad, no women are interested in you. Until you get a girlfriend and women that ignored you suddenly give you more attention especially if she's more attractive. I've had this discussion with men before and they agree and based on our man logic it's because women want what they can't have. Although it might be more nuanced than that.

It's a little more complicated than that. They want to feel like you're choosing them over other women. It makes them feel special to be chosen. It's a self esteem boost because women are always in competition with other women. It's why their friendships suck so much.

Band dudes, certain types of photographers and a few other artists get mega chicks.

Others get.... Zero.

That's a flat out lie. Women love creative men if they aren't socially retarded. They buy into that whole "I'm a sage guru and my muse tells me to make this amazing artwork" bullcrap. They don't care if the guy is homeless and living in a tent and smells like shit. If he paints good, and panders to the druggie festival hippie chicks, he'll literally swim in poon. Women buy into the dumbest fucking most autistic losers because of this. Women constantly buy into dumb, crazy bullcrap if it's attached to a creative and socially capable man. Why do you think so many hoes love crystals? I see it literally all the time. Women will throw themselves at literal gutter trash tier men if he's into that hippie bullshit and can sell it. It's not a coincidence that all of these Lolcows have an endlessly string of concubines lined up constantly. Women love what they perceive as passionate men.

I do get your point. But I still think there is no wall, women will always have options, options that are reduced in quality, but that's it.

Financial security will still come from taxation and the state redistributing wealth through social programs.

There is a wall. The wall is 30. That's when their pregnancies are medically considered at risk pregnancies. That's the Wall. That's all it is. They have reduced options moving forward because their viability to safely have children now only decreases as time goes on. Thus their options in men decrease. After another arbitrary point around 35-40, the options for the men they want are pretty much gone permanently. No man 25-40 who wants a family will date them. They're in direct competition with women 18-30 who have every advantage in the world compared to them.

All they can do is settle for plumber Jim. Sure, Plumber Jim makes good money. But his career isn't sexy enough for them. Our cultural will never let them settle and be happy. So yeah, if you're an unmarried woman who's not on her way to the altar by 30, it IS the apocylapse and women know this. That's why they always go nuts if they're 28 and single. It's why I tell all men to refuse to date women 27-32, because they're rushing you.

 

[Falcos_Commisar]

Women will throw themselves at literal gutter trash tier men if he's into that hippie bullshit and can sell it. It's not a coincidence that all of these Lolcows have an endlessly string of concubines lined up constantly. Women love what they perceive as passionate men

I was thinking more like a woodworker, leather worker, knife maker, things like that.

I HAVE seen dudes that paint old cars pull women way out of those league because they can make a 60+ year old car look nice.

There is a wall. The wall is 30. That's when their pregnancies are medically considered at risk pregnancies. That's the Wall. That's all it is. They have reduced options moving forward because their viability to safely have children now only decreases as time goes on. Thus their options in men decrease. After another arbitrary point around 35-40, the options for the men they want are pretty much gone permanently. No man 25-40 who wants a family will date them. They're in direct competition with women 18-30 who have every advantage in the world compared to them.

Correct. I was on a video call with some chick I matched with on an app on Friday.

She was in Boston and UNEMPLOYED. She bitched that her first serious boyfriend/marriage prospect wasn't willing to move overseas with her and it ended.

Then she bitched that the guy from about 2 years ago left her, went to Bali and married a "simple girl " and she couldn't understand why he did that because SHE was an educated boss babe. She then informed me that she had stopped sleeping around for the last year or so (lol) and was looking to get married in the next 3 months. She was 32....

Holy shiiiiittt. Not unattractive but not a stunner, think "nice looking".

Ladies tell on themselves constantly

Once they hit ~30 their standards go from strict (unless you're hot, a "project " or dangerous looking) to Romance novel fantasy

Since I'm not a dick/didn't want to get banned from the app I didn't say "Guy #2 probably left you for a younger, hotter women who was probably a LOT more pleasant to be around"

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

Since I'm not a dick/didn't want to get banned from the app I didn't say "Guy #2 probably left you for a younger, hotter women who was probably a LOT more pleasant to be around"

Well, I am. I don't mind being mean, so I straight up tell them, "No. You have nothing to offer me." Boss Babes don't seem to understand, they already have boyfriends and husbands. They married their job and career. When their job says your co-workers are "your family", if you're a Boss Babe you should take that literally. You traded your family for work.

To all the women out there, don't waste your time. You don't have forever. Don't price yourself out of a man. Above all, remember, no man cares about how "educated" you are. They only care about you being pleasant to be around and your loyalty.

 

[Overwrite7476]

These dumb bitches are trying to gaslight me into thinking the female orgasm exists so i stopped talking to them.

 

[Mordecai "3 Finger" Brown]

Better approach:
1. Literally just wait
2. Be present at functions where singles congregate but isn’t a dating-focused place

Depends on your life goals.

Even for men, if you desire children, particularly multiple, it's imperative to get started ASAP. In order to have as much childbearing railroad track ahead as possible.

Then there's the fact that college is the most plentiful place and time to effortlessly find a mate.

It's possible afterwards, but requires a lot more active effort with a much smaller and lesser quality pool.

With the workplace being frowned upon now as a potential place to date, it mostly leaves friend networks. Which themselves are quickly atrophying after college and becoming more staid and domestic.

I've had this discussion with men before and they agree and based on our man logic it's because women want what they can't have. Although it might be more nuanced than that.

I've seen the YouTuber hoe_math describe the phenomenon a few times. Not sure if it has a formal name.

I think it's less about wanting the unobtainable. It's more about FOMO and the psychological unconscious process of a man that's been pre-screened and approved by other female competitors appearing more desirable.

 

[Silvana'sPickle]

I think it’s more of if you’re taken, then you must be worth having. They may view that as evidence you’re not a pervert or violent. Obviously that’s not necessarily true, but it might explain their thought process.

 

[PetiteFeet]

I'm still single because I have wizard powers and a reputation to uphold.

I'm obese, a 2/10, painfully emotionally handicapped, I have mental health issues and I peaked at 15. I deliberately do not seek out dating because I'm a low value woman, and I'm fine with that. The only real issue is loneliness and touch starvation. As an introvert, I was never a social butterfly and I prefer solitude but it does sting internally when I see couples holding hands and I know I'll never get that.
So I just try to not drown in my own issues.