Why can't women on dating apps hold a conversation?

[Neo-Nazi Rich Evans]

because of pushy creeps who won’t take no (or silence) for an answer.

well two things:
1) silence is not an acceptable answer. grow some balls and just say what you mean, if you are not interested say no, im not interested.
2) if the creep wont take no for an answer then use the block button(and possibly report button), that is what it is there for.

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Or just ghost. Are you mad she didn't respond?

On a dating app? Lol no. Tinder is literally just a bootycall app. I will probably have a sour opinion of her if we ever met in person after; if she for example, matched with me, and then completely ignored everything and never responded, because I'm going to assume she's either A) Fucking ignorant. B) Swiping yes to everything. Neither of which are a good look, but I wouldn't be angry. If it was something like an older dating site - none spring to mind with the 'message anyone' format anymore - then not even that. It'd be no different to walking up to someone and trying to hit on them, and getting hit with 'not interested.' Dating apps are a low investment, low reward sort of thing. If we're having a good back and forth, and then she suddenly ghosts, I'm going to assume I was just a boilerplate while she chatted with other dudes, and someone else got her instead. Easy come, easy go.

In person? After we've set up a date? Yes, absolutely I'm going to be mad, I value my time and I value other peoples time. Why agree to meet, and then deliberately not arrive? That would be incredibly self centred for a person to do that.

 

[gang weeder]

Wow what a stupid question this is. Women don't need to contribute to conversations. Women don't need to be interesting. A woman can legitimately be little more than a pretty set piece who sits there (or lays on her back, when the time calls) and she'll still have plenty of male attention. It's obviously very different for men. How sheltered and naive are you?

 

[SwanSwanson]

Reddit of all places is unironically better for this shit, you're able to read her profile to see what type of individual the girl, you can filter for similar interests and there are less people shouting over you.

Not to powerlevel but I might very well get married pretty soon from this girl I first texted over reddit.

 

[Getting tard comed]

Aside of this cruel but apparent reply, I think most of people will be kinda dumb when a stranger asks them about their passion. What if I get verbose and seem dumb? What if my hobby is actually laughable as fuck? People want to make right impression and lack autistic self-confidence to state what they truly find intresting. It's the same "tell us about yourself" question from the job interview, most just have no idea what to say.

Your fucking up if you are doing this over text and not in person. Dating app are for a bantery introduction, a quick connection on interests, and then setting up an actual date at a specific place at a specific time. Anything else is fucking up. Go to reddit to talk to people.

'Being able to hold a conversation' and 'being able to set boundaries' are not put upon expectations; they are basic entry requirements to being an adult. If you are incapable of just saying 'Not interested, sorry.' then you're a child, not a woman. If you are incapable of engaging men in basic conversation, then you shouldn't even be on dating apps, you're wasting everyones time.

I see your problem. Most women(95%+) are functional children.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

You're more likely to find gay porn at a Christian bookstore than you are to find a well adjusted person on a dating app.

 

[PipTheAlchemist]

Women get bombarded with messages and don’t have time to write invested replies to each one. Women are even more cynical than men about online dating because of pushy creeps who won’t take no (or silence) for an answer.

Women are hesitant to respond because some men get weird, and that ruins it for normal men. Go to any women’s site and you’ll see women hate online dating as much as men do. It’s tragic. Online dating looks horrible, I say everyone should walk away from it.

Or people could just stop sucking balls at online dating, and maybe then society would improve with less psychopathic incels and crazy catladies wasting oxygen on this planet

 

[Car Won't Crank]

Reddit of all places is unironically better for this shit, you're able to read her profile to see what type of individual the girl, you can filter for similar interests and there are less people shouting over you.

Not to powerlevel but I might very well get married pretty soon from this girl I first texted over reddit.

Reddit? That's not a girl. It's a man baby!

 

[Stan]

It's not you it's the apps. They're a terrible place to meet anybody, they encourage users to judge matches by very shallow characteristics, and there's no emotional investment to continue talking to any one particular person. But if you ask for something shallow and specific on your profile (e.g. "message me if you are short and Jewish" "I love fat chicks", "No women, I'm gay" ), a bunch of people who don't match march into the inbox to demand "HEY! WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME?!" Once one gets enough of these messages, you feel a little calloused to the plight of your suitors. You're probably dealing with girls who are exhausted from the last 17 queries and only want to put in a minimal investment until they know that this thing with you has legs.

Go straight to the date, get coffee, and then chat. You'll have a better conversation face to face.

 

[Neo-Nazi Rich Evans]

It's not you it's the apps. They're a terrible place to meet anybody, they encourage users to judge matches by very shallow characteristics, and there's no emotional investment to continue talking to any one particular person.

no, it is me, but i am with you on how terrible the apps are. there are people who have made real connections using them, but at this point i dont see how and only explain it as those are the flukes and rare exceptions.

 

[Stan]

no, it is me, but i am with you on how terrible the apps are. there are people who have made real connections using them, but at this point i dont see how and only explain it as those are the flukes and rare exceptions.

It's like the lottery: you can't win if you don't play.

I'm sure you're a perfectly nice person. You don't have to be perfect to get a mate; nobody is perfect. Seek to enjoy your life as it is, and I think someone will see that contentment and want to be with you.

 

[Space_Dandy]

I'll give you a reply as a True and Honest womb having god fearing "cis" woman, a lot has been answered above but there's some things missing.
Beauty is a pain, men will have certain expectations but you've become shy because you're apparently above average, it puts a lot of pressure on you. There's this saying, "An average girl will be confident in the bedroom, a hot girl doesn't know what to do with herself" - Eleanor Roosevelt, 1984 or whoever the fuck. You put a certain expectation on us that we'll realistically never be able to meet, because we don't see what you see. There's also this "hot and cold" thing, people assume that girls do this on purpose but many times the opposite is true, we're just shy sometimes. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Aside from this, most times we're just not interested in you. The truth is that men and women have way different expectations of each other and to find a balance with this on a dating app of all places is incredibly hard unless you're both attractive and have matching interests. Usually men try to set up a date and we don't want this, we're generally much more introspective and touchy creatures than men, so if we seem hesitant or disinterested, it's usually because of this. What a lot of men, including troons don't understand is that most women are actually very thoughtful and introspective, so this clashes a lot with society's view of women in that the women is an object of beauty.

>Go on app specifically designed for setting up dates.
>'Men want to set up dates, which, we generally don't want.'

View attachment 3642443
C-can you see where some confusion might be found? Because that doesn't sound like introspection, it sounds like being a navel gazing, lazy retard.

@Johan Schmidt She said it in her post, that this behavior is characteristic of a woman who isn't interested in that particular man she is communicating with. She goes on to describe the shyness of women, which I think goes hand in hand with the well known fact that most women are terrified of confrontation and have a high degree of agreeableness.

Putting this together, women would rather seem passively disinterested and hope the man gets the hint rather than potentially draw his ire by either ignoring him, or rejecting him outright.

Also don't forget that on these dating services, women (any woman, even low effort profiles) get a tsunami of suiters. This means that 99% of them need to be gotten rid of one way or another, so this situation happens a lot.

 

[Wesley Willis]

Because they are bots. Dating apps don't exist to help you find a partner, they are a business that wants to extract as much revenue from men as possible.

 

[Unyielding Stupidity]

"Dating" apps are basically meat markets that are almost entirely based on appearance. You could literally be a wife-beating, child-molesting, borderline-retarded crack addict and you'll still get showered in matches as long as you have a nice jawline and a ripped bod.
People use dating apps for sex. That's it. They're hook-up apps. Any conversation that you have on said apps is done in hopes of having sex. If the other person ghosts you, it's because they don't want to have sex with you. There's no substance to any conversations that you have on them.

Because they are bots. Dating apps don't exist to help you find a partner, they are a business that wants to extract as much revenue from men as possible.

Or this. Assume most mainstream services are full of bots.

 

[The Wicked Mitch]

Women get bombarded with messages and don’t have time to write invested replies to each one. Women are even more cynical than men about online dating because of pushy creeps who won’t take no (or silence) for an answer.

Women are hesitant to respond because some men get weird, and that ruins it for normal men. Go to any women’s site and you’ll see women hate online dating as much as men do. It’s tragic. Online dating looks horrible, I say everyone should walk away from it.

The real answer is, of course, that ( these ) women believe that men they don't find attractive are unworthy of basic human consideration.

 

[Involuntary Celebrity]

OkCupid wrote about this on their research blog once or twice (which was deleted when they were acquired by the company that owns Tinder lol): https://archive.ph/P209c

Short version is a combination of negative feedback loops in user behaviour and the profit paradox of platforms that have no motivation to actually help you hook up.
But read it, there are flowcharts and graphs.

Of course girls could break those negative feedback loops if they had any honour. There was some data on that too: https://archive.ph/QNCbf

 

[UmQasaan]

Lack of personality, it's common for most of the app as a whole

https://towardsdatascience.com/i-analyzed-hundreds-of-users-tinder-data-including-messages-so-you-dont-have-to-14c6dc4a5fdd

https://archive.ph/d7FsR

Tinder has always been a hookup app. Try hinge or badoo

 

[Otterly]

well two things:
1) silence is not an acceptable answer. grow some balls and just say what you mean, if you are not interested say no, im not interested.
2) if the creep wont take no for an answer then use the block button(and possibly report button), that is what it is there for.

Just to play devils advocate for a minute here. I’ve never used a dating app, but have colleagues and friends who do. All of them have shown me multiple exchanges where it’s gone something like:
Man: hi pretty lady want to date?
Woman: thanks but you’re not my type, but good luck and have a nice day
Man: I WILL COME AND RAPE YOIR CORPSE YOU BITCH
All the women I know who have been in apps are very wary about turning men down becasue a number of them act like this. Women turn men down by the non direct approach (‘sorry I’ve got a boyfriend’ if you approach them in a bar for example) because while most men are fine, the percentage who will do you some damage if you outright refuse them is not zero. I’ve been approached in a pub more than once when I was just out with a couple of friends for a quiet one and been hit on, been very polite about saying no (ah sorry I’m just out with my friends tonight, you have a good one’ and been met with rage, it is scary.)
Taking that into account, a woman who is being cool but evasive isn’t interested in you so just leave it. We should all be more more honest and direct but people are weird.
Online dating looks like an absolute hellscape if I’m honest. There are decent women out there and there’s someone for everyone (I thought I’d end up a cat lady but I ended up getting married, believe me I’m no 10/10.) but those women aren’t, in the main, on dating apps. You have to go and meet people in real life and that is extremely difficult these days. Think about what the women you would like to meet ARE. Are they sporty? Go find a local hiking group. Cultured? Go do that. Practical? Gardening groups? Church? Etc. Also befriend people your parents age in those groups becasue one of them will have a simply lovely niece who would be perfect for you. Good luck

 

[Johnny Salami]

I just post a shirtless pic

 

[Bloitzhole]

Women get a million billion messages every day and have to filter them somehow. Unless you are the most interesting match of the hour/day/week, you won't make it through. It's an online dating problem, not a male or female problem.

My opening message is usually a variation of
"Online texting is like eating soup with chopsticks. So how about we don't do that and head to *location* and do *activity* - I'll bring Cheesecake. Worst case scenario, we'll hate eachother forever after 10 minutes BUT we'll still have cheesecake, and it's a pretty good day when there's cheesecake. Also I hear there's *thing at location*, which goes pretty well with cheesecake"

It usually goes alright with the type of woman I get along with IRL (not timid, active, enjoys cheesecake outside). And even when there's no spark, no click - it's really IS still a good day when you're outside with cheesecake.