Xbox Game Studios Stupidity Hate Thread Game Pass Edition

[Soggy Floppa]

Small handed soyboys upset at the large hand gigachads talking shit about their controllers

 

[Super Hans v2]

"When considering Global Readiness in relation to inclusive content, it's easiest to look at the factors that influence geopolitical risk to our games and related collateral in worldwide markets."

I can understand the (retarded) reasons for wanting to appeal to fags, niggers, and other defectives, but what the hell is this supposed to mean? That MS is declaring studios in warzones like GSC and 4A off limits for buyouts, or that they'll explicitly be pushing US foreign policy in their games?

 

[Fat Moron]

I think it means "don't use the gay logos during pride month on our Middle Eastern social media accounts". In practice we've been seeing what they do to make their games inclusive and global. Now we see the corpo wordsallad gobbledygook used to justify it. For example, we've seen AAA games aim at the lowest common denominator player to lessen "friction" as I've seen it called to optimize their engagement metrics. Here's how that Microsoft page worded it: "Where do customers commonly churn today and what do they need to stay engaged? How does this change during different parts of the customer lifecycle or by user group?".

Some more quotes. The section below is about Representation. This kind of thinking is how we have an industry for consultants like Sweetbaby:

80% of media consumed by the world is created in the US* and yet most media, including video games, don't contain characters and content that align to that broad consumer.

Research shows that players prefer to play characters that look like them and are more likely to purchase and play experiences where they align to the characters identity.

• 57% of players in the broader gaming market didn't play certain games because the games weren't made for them. Over half of the global gaming market.
• 53% of developers felt diversity in storytelling should be a priority and it was ranked as the third most important factor in industry growth.
• 41% of retail consumers have shifted 10% or more of their business away from brands that do not reflect their value in diversity & inclusion.

Questions to Consider​

• Are you telling new stories or sharing new perspectives within the product experience?
• Do all of your characters/player depictions look the same?
• What steps have you taken to ensure characters are represented respectfully and authentically?
• How have you validated assumptions you have made about your audience to check for blind spots or unintended stereotypes?
• Would you feel proud to show a member of a community how their culture/character is depicted within your experience?
• How are the wide range of customers depicted within your products, content portfolio and communications?
• What process have you used to validate how different groups of people or cultures are represented in your experience?
• Are you reinforcing any negative gender stereotypes?
  • Are you unnecessarily introducing gender & gender barriers into your code or design?
  • Are you creating playable female characters that are equal in skill and ability to their male peers. Are your female characters equipped with clothing and armor that fits their tasks? Do they have exaggerated body proportions?
  • When the story allows, do you show male characters who display a full range of emotions, including joy, sadness, and vulnerability?
• What % of screen time (on screen presence, speaking lines, heroes) is held by different gender/racial identities?
• Do you have a process to review key decisions with the lens of Helping Customers Feel Seen?

 

[Slav Power]

The PlayStation controller having the analogs at the bottom since 1993:

Makes as much sense as the Nintendo controller still having three prongs and one analog stick since 1996:

Because both were designed when no one really knew in which direction analog controls in games would go. But by the sixth generation it became clear that the future was two analogs, with the left analog becoming the primary form of control over the D-pad, which is something that Nintendo understood:

And so did the newcomer Microsoft:

But not Sony, which was still stubborn about having the inferior layout:

Which was a result of them slapping two analog sticks under what was essentially a legally distinct SNES controller designed after the fallout of the SNES CD-ROM project and slapping two analog sticks because it was the new cool shit and it was the easiest to put them there:

And to this day Sony swears by their inferior design:

While their competitors offer something that won't give their players carpal tunnel whenever they play anything besides pre-fifth generation titles:


But Sonyggers will defend the honor of their company with all their might as they suffer from Stockholm syndrome when they see that Xbox, Nintendo and PC players have better gamepad ergonomics, and that their overpriced consoles have no exclusives that are worth paying the premium for, but their loyalty to the brand is all that they have in life so they have to cling onto it and defend it or else they'll 41% themselves.

It's still not too late to admit defeat and just buy an Xbox.

 

[ZMOT]

It's still not too late to admit defeat and just buy an Xbox.

>buying an xbox to use an xbox controller
I get it, you're retarded

it's also obvious that you don't claw at all otherwise you'd know that it's absolutely ass on an xbox controller. imagine using the index finger on the thumbstick like an inbred retard

My hands start to hurt after using a playstation layout controller for extended periods of time. Your thumb does not rest in the position of the stick naturally and its uncomfortable.

that's because sony listened to some dumbfucks aping the xbox layout with the ps4, switching primary inputs to the triggers. up until the ps3 it was on the shoulder buttons, which means that's where you index fingers rest, so the thumbsticks are in good reach. holding it like you're supposed to now (turning your hands forward like on an xbox controller) doesn't work since your thumbs are too close together and upwards.

 

[Slav Power]

you don't claw at all

I don't, because I play on a PC and I have a civilized setup for FPS games consisting of a mouse and a keyboard so I don't have to go against my nature to get more precise on a device that was designed to be used by everyone and their grandma to get super serious in Call of Duty or whatever.

I guess that's what you meant by "holding the controller wrong", you're one of those mongoloids that plays everything with a grip that makes your hands look like Ricky Berwick's and then you're shocked that normal people don't do that because they're not insane, and the Xbox controller simply works for normal grip.

And in case you forgot what a "normal" grip looks like, here's a visual aid:

Thumbs on the face, index fingers on the triggers and bumpers, middle, middle finger, ring finger and pinky finger on the grip. That's how 99.9% of the human population holds a controller and that's what the Xbox controller was designed for, and that's what it works for.

Of course, if you're a braindead Sonygger you'll never understand the amount of precision PC gamers get by having two controllers, one with 104 assignable keys, and another with ~5 buttons and analog control so fine you need to use built-in aimbots to make up for the lack of precision of the little right nub.

 

[ZMOT]

I don't

>he didn't buy an xbox to use his xbox controller
lol pleb

Of course, if you're a braindead Sonygger you'll never understand the amount of precision PC gamers get by having two controllers, one with 104 assignable keys, and another with ~5 buttons and analog control so fine you need to use built-in aimbots to make up for the lack of precision of the little right nub.

you know, I've seen better posts from you, so I know you're smart(er). getting all pissy someone disagrees like some 12yo on 4chan is supposed to do what exactly?
protip: only one of us looks like a retard here, I let you figure out who.

 

[Slav Power]

>he didn't buy an xbox to use his xbox controller

You made that argument, not me. I said buy an Xbox if you're a coping Sonygger (and you clearly are), an Xbox does everything your shitty console does at a lower price. The better controller is only one of those reasons. Another one is the fact you have no games worth the premium.

 

[DeadwastePrime]

i prefer the superior wii u/steam deck thumbstick placement

 

[ZMOT]

I think it means "don't use the gay logos during pride month on our Middle Eastern social media accounts". In practice we've been seeing what they do to make their games inclusive and global. Now we see the corpo wordsallad gobbledygook used to justify it.

the confusing part is their games will never work there, or anywhere else outside north america/western europe because the amount of DEI BRIDGE to be produced is diametrically opposed to what those regions want or even accept. the more they pozz the neghole of their poor games, the more they have to cut and replace, think spiderman gay flags times 10. but somehow they believe they can still make a "global" product...

but the way things are going I can't wait for microsoft to replace those flags with the palestine or ukraine flag only to get banned in the rest of the region and enrage their tribal investors.

You made that argument, not me.

It's still not too late to admit defeat and just buy an Xbox.

those xnigger chimpouts are adorable. sad, but adorable.
even a ghetto niglet understands shoulder buttons are superior for critical inputs by travel time alone. I didn't bag you for such a fucking casual.
otoh, "windows 11 is great bro, just install these dozen of third party programs, replace half the UI, mess another hour with the registry, and then it's fucking awesome" should've clued me in that you're just a little microcuck. this is how you have to cope by shitting yourself calling everyone a soynigger (apparently you're such a pro not knowing you can use a dualshock and any other other controller on PC, but whatever works for you).
does windows 11 even allow you to use those 101 keys yet or do you need another third party program for that too?

imagine simping for those guys

not even applefags are that gay, and those pay 1000 bucks for a monitor stand.

 

[Slav Power]

otoh, "windows 11 is great bro, just install these dozen of third party programs, replace half the UI, mess another hour with the registry, and then it's fucking awesome" should've clued me in that you're just a little microcuck

Yeah okay now you're just grasping at straws. Just keep in mind that if you act like a retard ironically you still look like a retard.

Also lol, pointing out Xbox's wokery while being a Sonygger

 

[Soggy Floppa]

i prefer the superior wii u/steam deck thumbstick placement

Wii U layout was good for games where you move the camera a lot (shooters), but bad when you pressed the buttons a lot (RPGs, bing bing games, etc).

Valve took the Wii U design and then perfected it by making all the inputs on the same level and filling the empty space with touch pads that can be bound to anything

The only thing wrong with the Deck is that the shoulder buttons are hard to reach and to use the touch pads you have to shift your grip to hold it lower or else you get the finger strain from the playstation controllers. I hope Valve releases a Steam controller 2 with the Deck layout and better shoulder buttons, because other than that its basically perfect.

 

[Super Hans v2]

it's also obvious that you don't claw at all otherwise you'd know that it's absolutely ass on an xbox controller. imagine using the index finger on the thumbstick like an inbred retard

How fucking small and/or fat are all your guys' hands that you fight about having to shift them around to reach certain buttons or have a rest position? I just like the PS controllers because I grew up with them, not because I can't have such poor motor functions that it's arduous to switch between the dpad and thumbstick or can't put my indexes in the dead slot between L1/R1 and L2/R2.

 

[Two Dollars]

It's literally just a SNES controller with thumb sticks. If this were the N64 or Dreamcast controller, you'd have a point, but the PS2 is the most widely sold console not only for the games but for the general ease of use of their controllers compared to the Xbox's or Gamecube's.

It’s the most widely sold console because it was the only console to work as a cheap DVD player when they were brand new, and it could play a giant library of PS1 games on day one, and it got a one year head start against its competition. If those three things weren’t true, there’s no way it would have gotten even half the sales.

Nevertheless, I don’t like the PS2 controller either. It feels cheap, and I don’t like the stick placement. Even the d-pad doesn’t feel great, but it’s a dream compared to the one on Gamecube/Xbox/Dreamcast.

 

[Slav Power]

I hope Valve releases a Steam controller 2 with the Deck layout and better shoulder buttons

YES, I am praying that Valve will take their lessons from the Deck, and make a Steam Controller 2 which will basically cram the Deck controls into a gamepad. So having the D-pad/action buttons on the exact same level as the analog sticks and add two touchpads beneath that, and of course keeping the gyro controls which will be handy for Wii/Wii U/Switch emulation. If they'd manage to add the pressure sensitive buttons of PS2/PS3 using opto-mechanical switches on top of it all it would be the perfect controller for absolutely everything.

People gave Valve too much shit for the OG Steam Controller because that was one of the three of their ventures into hardware, the other two being Steam Machines and Steam Link. Out of the three the Steam Controller had the brightest future, but then people shat on every Valve hardware thing they've made since, and what did they make since those? Valve Index and Steam Deck. Two massive successes. And faggot journos are laughing at the idea of a Controller 2 while I see immense potential in what Valve can do now after all they've learned.

 

[Übertroon]

View attachment 5836864

Why are all xbox users some type of brown?

 

[TheHarbinger]

It's a good controller, but I still prefer the S controller for the original Xbox.

The wired 360 controller was the best. They use them in the U.S. military to pilot drones and other tech. So sometimes the Army or the Navy will just scour eBay or some other site and purchase every single 360 wired controller that they can find.

They don't even sell an official Xbox Series wired controller anymore as far as I can see. Just cheap third party wired controllers.

 

[The Last Stand]

I love the ergonomics of the Xbox controller. I can get by with a PS controller. It's small, but you can manage over time if you're a regular at playing video games. The pressure sensitive face buttons felt unnecessary.

 

[#lurker]

Why do Sonyfags always bring up the woke shit? All these companies are woke, Sony is no exception. Try playing Spiderman where you arrange gay marriages and erect BLM murals.

 

[Mega Black]

I don't get the decision making process at MS. So they're going to port some exclusives to nab extra sales. So they port Hi Fi which is a game that did not sell well and still won't sell well because it appeals to a very niche audience, apparently they AREN'T going to port Starfield, which will probably sell at least another million on the console.