Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

The comment:

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I'm not going to be around when this finishes uploading, as I've got shit to do this evening, but it's set as an instant premiere which means chat is on to make fun of Lucas in real time.


So, I'm trying a beta option where Youtube, if you get a copyright claim for having shitty music on your videos, lets it try to just remove the song instead of muting the whole segment.

It may or may not work and if it ends up muting large chunks of the video entirely I'll just reupload.
 
I’m thinking more along the lines of a Charlie Cheswick a la “One Flew Over the Cookoos Nest” freak out if Lucas doesn’t stop bossing him around and physically ripping things out of his hands. Dude may look slow, but I’m willing to bet he can launch himself over that table pretty quickly if Lucas doesn’t stop fucking with him.
I'd fucking pay to see that chimpout.
Bum fights at Mallon. Place your bets!
 
Just watched his latest boardgame vid with that troll looking dude Jamie and some author autist. That is some of the most autistic shit I've ever seen. Mind numbingly boring. It's like watching a physical manifestation of his need to look impossibly brilliant beyond comprehension just incase a smart pretty interesting girl happens to walk by. Every facet of his personality and interests is a coping mechanism. The need to be perceived as something more. I don't know if I've ever seen a better example of overcompensation before.
 
Lucas clearly thinks he's turning into king shit because he had a 3 person session of his insane game

Oh you thought the way Lucas speaks to and tries to manipulate young girls is abhorrent? Wait until you see how he treats mentally slow people.
He’s got a pretty high superiority complex over dudes that, if not observed carefully, would probably eat the game pieces if left unattended.
 

So apparently one of the speds he was playing with was so bored with lucas's game that he was playing solitaire at the same time

and he is having a contest to rename the game, must include the words dice or roll, is by DMing him on instagram and 'no you're not going to win anything from me'....if I like the game i'll take it from yoj which defeats the purpose of having a contest

Plus lucas recorded the guy playing solitaire while playing:
'I think it rocks cause I invented it' - lucas werner

Also, lucas proving how much of a manipulative 'feminist' he is:
 
Lucas is such a bastard in this new footage. He's patronizing that poor Jamie guy to such an insane degree, basically calling him stupid, telling him to pay attention, and both of these poor guys are so compromised or overly medicated they're just putting up with Lucas's behavior. It's classic Lucas that he doesn't recognize how much of a piece of shit this video makes him look like. He thinks it's about his game, but it really tells you everything about his personality.

Mallon Place isn't really for people like lucas. Yes, he has mental problems, but Lucas really should be able to work a crappy job at Walmart or McDonald's. He's not like these other two guys. Mallon Place is for them. If Lucas is sufficiently medicated, he should be able to manage a degree of autonomy beyond these guys... But as I said, his personality is The stumbling block, not his mental illnesses.

You can totally understand why Luca forces these people to play with him. It makes him feel so superior, this life he's created for himself where he's surrounded by literal speds. These guys, who belong at Mallon Place, are beneath Lucas, and he loves it so much.

Lucas's main problem is and will always be his personality. He's just a fundamentally terrible person. His interactions with other people always reveal it.

Edit: In regards to Mitchell playing solitaire at the same time as Lucas's stupid game: you could really tell Lucas was bothered by that. His ego demands that his dumb game gets people's full attention. He told Mitchell that he wasn't going to be able to manage playing both games at the same time. Yeah, because Lucas's game is so mentally demanding. So much strategy. What a joke.

Lucas is sitting here between Galaxy Mouth, who probably has a better chance of discovering a cure for cancer than he does understanding the concept of clockwise rotation of player turns, and Monsieur Solitaire over here, who refuses to give Lucas's game the respect and solemnity it deserves, by playing the infinitely inferior solitaire AT THE SAME TIME! Our boy Dr. Nigga Luke was barely holding it together, folks. Imagine sullying "Roll of Valor" by placing it on the same table as a stupid card game! It's like drinking your Dom Perignon out of a Flintstones Jelly Glass. Philistines.

Edit 2: More fool-proof advice on how to pick up women from the dateless wonder
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Lucas is such a bastard in this new footage. He's patronizing that poor Jamie guy to such an insane degree, basically calling him stupid, telling him to pay attention, and both of these poor guys are so compromised or overly medicated they're just putting up with Lucas's behavior. It's classic Lucas that he doesn't recognize how much of a piece of shit this video makes him look like. He thinks it's about his game, but it really tells you everything about his personality.

Mallon Place isn't really for people like lucas. Yes, he has mental problems, but Lucas really should be able to work a crappy job at Walmart or McDonald's. He's not like these other two guys. Mallon Place is for them. If Lucas is sufficiently medicated, he should be able to manage a degree of autonomy beyond these guys... But as I said, his personality is The stumbling block, not his mental illnesses.

You can totally understand why Luca forces these people to play with him. It makes him feel so superior, this life he's created for himself where he's surrounded by literal speds. These guys, who belong at Mallon Place, are beneath Lucas, and he loves it so much.

Lucas's main problem is and will always be his personality. He's just a fundamentally terrible person. His interactions with other people always reveal it.

Edit: In regards to Mitchell playing solitaire at the same time as Lucas's stupid game: you could really tell Lucas was bothered by that. His ego demands that his dumb game gets people's full attention. He told Mitchell that he wasn't going to be able to manage playing both games at the same time. Yeah, because Lucas's game is so mentally demanding. So much strategy. What a joke.

Lucas is sitting here between Galaxy Mouth, who probably has a better chance of discovering a cure for cancer than he does understanding the concept of clockwise rotation of player turns, and Monsieur Solitaire over here, who refuses to give Lucas's game the respect and solemnity it deserves, by playing the infinitely inferior solitaire AT THE SAME TIME! Our boy Dr. Nigga Luke was barely holding it together, folks. Imagine sullying "Roll of Valor" by placing it on the same table as a stupid card game! It's like drinking your Dom Perignon out of a Flintstones Jelly Glass. Philistines.

Edit 2: More fool-proof advice on how to pick up women from the dateless wonder
View attachment 2783081

if an older guy called me ma’am, I can assure you it would not be a charm.
 
Lucas is such a bastard in this new footage. He's patronizing that poor Jamie guy to such an insane degree, basically calling him stupid, telling him to pay attention, and both of these poor guys are so compromised or overly medicated they're just putting up with Lucas's behavior. It's classic Lucas that he doesn't recognize how much of a piece of shit this video makes him look like. He thinks it's about his game, but it really tells you everything about his personality.

Mallon Place isn't really for people like lucas. Yes, he has mental problems, but Lucas really should be able to work a crappy job at Walmart or McDonald's. He's not like these other two guys. Mallon Place is for them. If Lucas is sufficiently medicated, he should be able to manage a degree of autonomy beyond these guys... But as I said, his personality is The stumbling block, not his mental illnesses.

You can totally understand why Luca forces these people to play with him. It makes him feel so superior, this life he's created for himself where he's surrounded by literal speds. These guys, who belong at Mallon Place, are beneath Lucas, and he loves it so much.

Lucas's main problem is and will always be his personality. He's just a fundamentally terrible person. His interactions with other people always reveal it.

Edit: In regards to Mitchell playing solitaire at the same time as Lucas's stupid game: you could really tell Lucas was bothered by that. His ego demands that his dumb game gets people's full attention. He told Mitchell that he wasn't going to be able to manage playing both games at the same time. Yeah, because Lucas's game is so mentally demanding. So much strategy. What a joke.

Lucas is sitting here between Galaxy Mouth, who probably has a better chance of discovering a cure for cancer than he does understanding the concept of clockwise rotation of player turns, and Monsieur Solitaire over here, who refuses to give Lucas's game the respect and solemnity it deserves, by playing the infinitely inferior solitaire AT THE SAME TIME! Our boy Dr. Nigga Luke was barely holding it together, folks. Imagine sullying "Roll of Valor" by placing it on the same table as a stupid card game! It's like drinking your Dom Perignon out of a Flintstones Jelly Glass. Philistines.

Edit 2: More fool-proof advice on how to pick up women from the dateless wonder
View attachment 2783081
It must also piss lucas off to no end that not only did he get beaten at his own game but got beaten by a heavily medicated sped who barely understood what was going on and was playing solitaire at the same time and barely paying attention to playing against lucas

Also, with lucas getting handsy and aggressive with both of them when they don't do exactly what he wants I wonder how long it'll be before he gets too pushy with one of them and they pop off at him, might even get it on video seeing as he is recording these games. I can see one of them getting pissed off at lucas being grabby and condescending to them and doing this sooner or later
 
Also, with lucas getting handsy and aggressive with both of them when they don't do exactly what he wants I wonder how long it'll be before he gets too pushy with one of them and they pop off at him, might even get it on video seeing as he is recording these games. I can see one of them getting pissed off at lucas being grabby and condescending to them and doing this sooner or later
Maybe an altercation will be enough for Mallon to either sedate him or toss him out on his ass. I’m hoping it’s the latter. I was looking forward to him having a place to live because I figured it would lead to more content, like his apartment did, but this is one of the most boring sagas.

Plus Lucas being thrown out into the cold, bad feet and all, would should the universe has a sense of justice. Hell…seeing the bloated leach end up homeless, and footless, might be so morally right it convinces me a just god exists. And that would definitely be in line with the holiday season lol
 
Maybe an altercation will be enough for Mallon to either sedate him or toss him out on his ass. I’m hoping it’s the latter. I was looking forward to him having a place to live because I figured it would lead to more content, like his apartment did, but this is one of the most boring sagas.

Plus Lucas being thrown out into the cold, bad feet and all, would should the universe has a sense of justice. Hell…seeing the bloated leach end up homeless, and footless, might be so morally right it convinces me a just god exists. And that would definitely be in line with the holiday season lol
I know I PERSONALLY would be grinning ear-to-ear, going to church every day, and whispering fuckin' " O' Little Town of Bethlehem" if I could only hear:

*ahem*

"... because if YOUR GOD was REAL I'd have FEET and a gorlfriend, wouldn't I? Don't see any little piggies enjoying Clinkerdagger roast beef at the end of these legs, do I? Quod erat demonstrandum, BITCH! EVIDENCE OR FUCK OFF!"

*sigh*

Well, a Q-Bert can dream. BTW, your bonne riposte in these YouTube comments gave me quite the chuckle, @VoidFace :

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New boardgame out already, whose rules are so self explanatory that you get to listen to a conversation between a geriatric patient and a nurse for the first two minutes, and then the rules explanation is classic Werner non sequiturs.

So he is finally done playing at being a wargame designer, and now he wants to be Uwe Rosenberg and make farming games. Even for schizophrenics he is incredibly derivative, I find myself missing the Dance of the Telomeres.

 
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New boardgame out already, whose rules are so self explanatory that you get to listen to a conversation between a geriatric patient and a nurse for the first two minutes, and then the rules explanation is classic Werner non sequiturs.

So he is finally done playing at being a wargame designer, and now he wants to be Uwe Rosenberg and make farming games. Even for schizophrenics he is incredibly derivative, I find myself missing the Dance of the Telomeres.

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Sounds like two drunks talking nonsense while sitting outside a liquor store bumming booze money

and of course he makes yet another game nonsensically centered around food
 
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Also tonight's video will be his stupid IG board game nonsense.
Damn, that's pathetic. When did he have this dream, as a highschooler who had never spoken to a girl? Didn't Lucas not even lose his virginity til he was 27 or 28 or something?

Also this goes without saying but the "call older women honey and younger women ma'am" thing is so wildly off base, it's hilarious how everything Lucas believes about women is completely wrong and bizarre.
 
Lucas losing at his own game is hilarious not because he made it, but because it's clear he can't understand the strategy to play it well despite his ego.

Game designers lose to other people in their own games all the time, that's not an issue. It can show deeper depth than the creator possessed, a difference in luck, or can reveal imbalanced design. Lucas' game actually does have enough potential depth to be engaging. However, he lost because he's bad. He lost because he's incapable of foresight and adaptation. He lost because he's stupid that you can play solitaire at the same time as you out smart him.
 
Damn, that's pathetic. When did he have this dream, as a highschooler who had never spoken to a girl? Didn't Lucas not even lose his virginity til he was 27 or 28 or something?

Also this goes without saying but the "call older women honey and younger women ma'am" thing is so wildly off base, it's hilarious how everything Lucas believes about women is completely wrong and bizarre.
As off base as it is, at least it's an improvement over his "young women are aroused by the n-word" theory.

Although he no doubt STILL believes that as well, so... perhaps not.
 
Lucas is such a bastard in this new footage. He's patronizing that poor Jamie guy to such an insane degree, basically calling him stupid, telling him to pay attention, and both of these poor guys are so compromised or overly medicated they're just putting up with Lucas's behavior. It's classic Lucas that he doesn't recognize how much of a piece of shit this video makes him look like. He thinks it's about his game, but it really tells you everything about his personality.

Mallon Place isn't really for people like lucas. Yes, he has mental problems, but Lucas really should be able to work a crappy job at Walmart or McDonald's. He's not like these other two guys. Mallon Place is for them. If Lucas is sufficiently medicated, he should be able to manage a degree of autonomy beyond these guys... But as I said, his personality is The stumbling block, not his mental illnesses.

You can totally understand why Luca forces these people to play with him. It makes him feel so superior, this life he's created for himself where he's surrounded by literal speds. These guys, who belong at Mallon Place, are beneath Lucas, and he loves it so much.

Lucas's main problem is and will always be his personality. He's just a fundamentally terrible person. His interactions with other people always reveal it.

Edit: In regards to Mitchell playing solitaire at the same time as Lucas's stupid game: you could really tell Lucas was bothered by that. His ego demands that his dumb game gets people's full attention. He told Mitchell that he wasn't going to be able to manage playing both games at the same time. Yeah, because Lucas's game is so mentally demanding. So much strategy. What a joke.

Lucas is sitting here between Galaxy Mouth, who probably has a better chance of discovering a cure for cancer than he does understanding the concept of clockwise rotation of player turns, and Monsieur Solitaire over here, who refuses to give Lucas's game the respect and solemnity it deserves, by playing the infinitely inferior solitaire AT THE SAME TIME! Our boy Dr. Nigga Luke was barely holding it together, folks. Imagine sullying "Roll of Valor" by placing it on the same table as a stupid card game! It's like drinking your Dom Perignon out of a Flintstones Jelly Glass. Philistines.

Edit 2: More fool-proof advice on how to pick up women from the dateless wonder
View attachment 2783081

I wonder how that's been working out for him the last 11 years.

Also, all of his goddamned board games are the same. They're all the same. He just changes what shit is called.

Lucas losing at his own game is hilarious not because he made it, but because it's clear he can't understand the strategy to play it well despite his ego.

Game designers lose to other people in their own games all the time, that's not an issue. It can show deeper depth than the creator possessed, a difference in luck, or can reveal imbalanced design. Lucas' game actually does have enough potential depth to be engaging. However, he lost because he's bad. He lost because he's incapable of foresight and adaptation. He lost because he's stupid that you can play solitaire at the same time as you out smart him.

Lucas not being able to plan ahead? NO WAY!
 
Last time the Creep went on a board game "designing" spree he was off his meds. He posted the video on his "new" game "The Game Is Called 25 Acres Of Trust" at 2:04 am and the next one "1 Point Per Made Item" at 4:54 am Spokane time. He spent the night "brain storming". I'm wondering if the Creeper is already skipping taking his meds.

 
Last time the Creep went on a board game "designing" spree he was off his meds. He posted the video on his "new" game "The Game Is Called 25 Acres Of Trust" at 2:04 am and the next one "1 Point Per Made Item" at 4:54 am Spokane time. He spent the night "brain storming". I'm wondering if the Creeper is already skipping taking his meds.

This is really significant.

As far as I know, this is the first night since he's been at Mallon Place that he's made videos all night, and possibly the first night that he's stayed up all night.

I second the med issues suggestion.
 
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