Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[MirnaMinkoff]

By any chance did Ralph bring his louis vuitton man purse for the trip?

Yes, his GUCCI purse, his ARMANI sunglasses, and RALPH LAUREN (George Costanza) jacket were on full display today.

Ralph is sporting the same fashion plate ensemble he wore in that selfie with a dude that had his fly open. It’s his fanciest fancy outfit.

 

[Paddy O' Furniture]

That was me, I mentioned it became traveling through West Texas there's a section of I-10 close enough to the Rio Grande in the desert where your phone will randomly jump to the Mexican cell towers and effectively brick it until you get 20 miles from the border back in the days before you had the option to manually change networks again.

I was going to mention eSims, but didn't want to inadvertently make his trip cheaper.

 

[Guntkvd]

What are the odds that one of 140 gunt's viewers lives in Lisbon. I sure hope he's not one of secret kiwi aylogs.

 

[Leon Breitling]

I'd heard "living well is the best revenge" but I don't think it meant to fly out of country to eat fast food and overpriced rice.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

It's not even good season to go to Portugal, When you to places in South europe you at least want do it while summer, when it's a good weather and hot season is going.
Ralph of course never cared about anything like that, because the only thing he cares about is bragging about how much cash he can waste and expanding the Gunt.

Cold weather is better when you are really fat. I'm not even judging him for that, it's just a fact. If he went there in warm season he'd probably be trapped inside his hotel room with the air conditioning cranked to max.

That's why fat people have trouble exercising. They can be in a cold environment but then when they exert themselves they cook themselves from the inside because their body is so insulated they can't remove the heat as fast as they create it. Extremely obese people have to exercise in pools, not because they can't lift themselves, but because the water improves their ability to release heat.

 

[oramge cat]

yeah makes sense. still weird that his camera quality is such shit. his first priority for spending money is always spite though.
he should be able to afford something of more quality than his cheap model QX8804 chinese IED phone to take nicer pictures, but then again he’s only taking the pictures to spite someone.

i was about to ask who couldve taken the pictures where both hands are visible, but saw this on his twitter! one of the many big killstream fans in portugal. the picture of him at the burger king is pointing downward, showing gunt’s true 5’1 stature
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it’s funny cause of how short he is the selfie stick would be so low, that almost anyone regardless of height could just grab it while running

How does he manage to top bragging about ordering a $100 plain tomahawk steak with no sides at a steakhouse in Vegas?* And from looking at that mayo it looks like it's not even a house-made aioli, it's just mayo from whatever Portugal's equivalent of Sysco is mixed with a bit of paprika. The shrimp doesn't look anything special either. This dish screams "we have this on the menu for the white tourists".
*For anyone who doesn't know btw, at a lot of higher end steakhouses you order your cut of beef separately from your sides, so you can choose mac and cheese or asparagus or whatever. Some might even offer a choice of topping/sauce. Ordering just a steak is fantastically trashy and a good way to get made fun of by the kitchen and hated by your server.

 

[Eternal Struggler]

Weren't Ralph and that portuguese kid gonna tune in on Dick's show today/yesterday?

 

[Slimy Time]

Weren't Ralph and that portuguese kid gonna tune in on Dick's show today/yesterday?

Supposedly. Has Dick dropped the episode and Ralph is nowhere to be heard on it? I stopped listening to it once it became bad and doubly so once diddler Dax became a thing.

 

[High Tea]

Supposedly. Has Dick dropped the episode and Ralph is nowhere to be heard on it? I stopped listening to it once it became bad and doubly so once diddler Dax became a thing.

Dick explains his injury. He was walking the dog and he fell off a curb, He blames it on how ignorant women are against prostitution because of his Killstream debate. I spot checked it and I didn't hear Ralph, but Gator was on discussing anime and Jim's room.

 

[Slimy Time]

Dick explains his injury. He was walking the dog and he fell off a curb, He blames it on how ignorant women are against prostitution because of his Killstream debate. I spot checked it and I didn't hear Ralph, but Gator was on discussing anime and Jim's room.

That is the most middle aged/getting old way of breaking something. Falling off a curb doing a daily activity and his body just imploding. Youtube comments helped, Gunt calls in at 22:05.

 

[Zeno Bardas]

CHRIST *snorts some coke* IS *gets a hooker* KANG *splurt*

 

[AltisticRight]

I bet Pantsu, being the dutiful wife baby mama that she is, is taking notes so she can attempt to cook something Portuguese for Ralph when he gets home. So far her shopping list is:

• Precooked shrimp
• Mayonnaise
• Half a lemon
• Burger King

I look forward to seeing her try to cook something exotic, so hopefully Ralph gives her more to work with before the trip is over.

I bet Amanda can make a better looking prawn cocktail than that.
Her seafood plates have been improving, honestly. Only the piece of lemon would be different, it's (or its if I were a brain-rotten Discord furry) gonna be a lemon wheel.

 

[not william stenchever]

It's almost like the universe has cursed him with odd cuts of lemons, which is made funnier by his association with Dlive.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

The portuguese have several amazing pork belly dishes, is eating pork belly offensive to the Gunt?

 

[Cabbagerolls]

The portuguese have several amazing pork belly dishes, is eating pork belly offensive to the Gunt?

Yeah, it's cannibalism.

 

[SuperConglomerateWhale]

Hurr, durr, maybe he wanted to fly to Portugal just to eat some mall food court tier turds you're just jelly!

You're clearly getting the purpose of this trip wrong. He's in Lisbon so he can briefly train as an acrobat.

 

[Desktop User2]

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this nigga paid $62 for shrimp and mayonnaise

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The Pincho de gambas com arroz was the second cheapest item in the the Peixes section of the menu (19,50 €) and the Toucinho do céu is 7,50 €. Truly Ralph is eating the meal of kings.

Total of €82 ($92.86) for some good ol' scrimpf and mayo (4 ct.) with a side of rice and a light dessert.

Toucinho do céu doesn´t have cheese, nor it has any semblance to a cheesecake. Also, Portugal has amazing, cheap food at any tasca and somehow he found the trappiest of tourist traps with vomit for food. It´s a wigger super power.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

By any chance did Ralph bring his louis vuitton man purse for the trip?

Yes, his GUCCI purse, his ARMANI sunglasses, and RALPH LAUREN (George Costanza) jacket were on full display today.

Ralph is sporting the same fashion plate ensemble he wore in that selfie with a grimy dude that had his fly open. It’s his fanciest fancy successful man outfit because he’s too fat and poor for a decent suit, so he goes full tilt mall wigger.

 

[AnOminous]

tl;dr this thread: Ethan Ralph blew a bunch of money to eat a bowl of jizzum with a couple shrimp in it and a hamburger. The end.

 

[not william stenchever]

tl;dr this thread: Ethan Ralph blew a bunch of money to eat a bowl of jizzum with a couple shrimp in it and a hamburger. The end.

He consumed the chum chalice