Megathread Trannies posting their L's Online - Heckin valid people posting their funny misfortunes on the internet

[Otterly]

I can confirm it is funny. PL below:

Please keep doing this. It’s wonderful.
I do try to do similar as ‘oh I’m a bit old and out of touch’ but we’ve started burning our own old women as witches again, so to see someone be able to do it with impunity is great.

 

[TismFarmer]

View attachment 5947452

I Love how he says he does 'small and simple tasks' for them. Freakshow makes it sound like a special needs placement.
Also sounds like they make him set out the paint and wipe the lunchtables etc instead of having any contact with the children.

 

[The Morning Visitor]

Um ackshually oboes (and other double reed instruments like bassoons) typically are not used in marching bands because (1) they’re not loud enough and (2) double reeds are too delicate and easily damaged /autism

I would have said trumpet or sousaphone or trombone, but oboe is definitely the dorkiest of the woodwind/brass instruments.

Everyone knows what a trumpet sounds like. Then a trombone is similar, but deeper and smoothly slides, almost like the fretless bass of trumpets. The sousaphone makes the same sound that fat people make while walking. The bassoon follows the "Kiki-Bouba" phenomenon and you can guess that it's probably on the lower register just from the shape of your mouth when you say the letters. Flutes are what gay little elves play, everyone knows them. But nobody knows what oboes sound like except for people that play oboes. They're quirky and weird, just like pooners!

 

[Shiki Ouji]

Um ackshually oboes (and other double reed instruments like bassoons) typically are not used in marching bands because (1) they’re not loud enough and (2) double reeds are too delicate and easily damaged /autism

I believe they meant the clarinets

 

[Standardized Profile]

View attachment 5947569View attachment 5947570View attachment 5947571View attachment 5947573
“We’re your family now.” I can see why someone would want to kill the selves if your real family cuts you out and the only thing you have is a bunch of trannies just looking to exploit and use you.

"Your phone will be removed from our plan as soon as possible" has such an air of devastating finality.

When I was writing that I somehow missed the incorrect word being used.


Thoroughly owned

ANE contributions to modernity are really interesting. People complain that some countries still use miles or pounds ... we're still using measurements from Sumer.

Thread tax! Wait until she finds out about hair loss and how hard it is to keep weight off/keep muscle on as you age. Of course, these things are superficial; women are sexually repulsed by all pooners, even the tall ripped ones with a full head of hair.

Spoiler: text

r/ftm•bnanzaz

I never had height dysphoria but now when I see how much it seems to affect cis guys, it bothers me​

I’m 5ft I’m small
This never bothered me before but when I hear about a guy that’s 5ft 7 and he is feeling short and insecure it starts to play havoc with me
It’s like it opened a door for me into something I never felt insecure about before
Now I feel like I’ll never be able to attract a female because I’ll be seen as weak and short
I’ll never be taken seriously as a male because of this etc etc
I don’t understand how I’ve gotten here

I have no idea what this person is trying to say, other than she intends to abuse any future children. Mom was right.

Spoiler: text

r/ftm•matthiahs24

Best compliment from my terf mom: You’re a terrible mother​

I have no kids. She wants to put it in my head that I would want to have kids one day in a ladylike way instead of a gentlemanlike way.
She wants me to pick out girly clothes for her to wear, pick out her feminine products and buy them for her, and try to push me to be interested in pregnancy. She thinks we are the same, not in the sense that I am a male version of her and my great grandma either, but the same gender as them.
Told her that if I have to pick out her clothes, it will be men’s clothes, just like how she made me cross dress as a child. I was no girl, and am still not one.

Just like your future rotdog will, in the hypoxic stage right before it dies and falls off:

Spoiler: text

u/ttootodori

my Mr Limpy turned blue!!​

my dearest Mr Limpy (which is extra long) was with me during a hot sweaty day, and all the upper part turned blue from the blue fabric of my boxers. No one actually would see it except for me, but I'm sad my boi is blue and I really want it back to its original colour

This is a weekly occurrence. (Jimi Hendrix has been busy.) Bonus points for 41% ideation:

Spoiler: text

r/ftm•vodkamutinie

NSFW

I found out I’m pregnant​

{Flaired as nsfw cuz preggo mention}
Like the title says, I’m pregnant now. From some guy I don’t really care took much abt and I’m not that attracted to, we were just a casual hookup. He told me he had a vasectomy and we used some spermicide shit he had and I trusted him, and now I feel stupid. As a transguy this is literally like a horror movie for me rn, my depression just ramped up tenfold and I don’t know what to do. I definitely don’t want to keep it and I’m not that far along but I don’t have money for shit and I’m so scared. I wanna jump off a fucking building holy shit
{edit: posted this earlier to the depression reddit and ooo boy is it not going over well folks I could really use some kind words} {second edit: he said he’d help me out so I’m more relaxed now but I’m still shaken up}

 

[Anasa Tristis]

Invisalign:

Invisalign ain’t one & done either. You need to pop in pricey (and fairly short lived) retainers every night for the rest of your life.

 

[$5.3 Million Dollars]

r/ftm•vodkamutinie

NSFW

I found out I’m pregnant​

{Flaired as nsfw cuz preggo mention}
Like the title says, I’m pregnant now. From some guy I don’t really care took much abt and I’m not that attracted to, we were just a casual hookup. He told me he had a vasectomy and we used some spermicide shit he had and I trusted him, and now I feel stupid. As a transguy this is literally like a horror movie for me rn, my depression just ramped up tenfold and I don’t know what to do. I definitely don’t want to keep it and I’m not that far along but I don’t have money for shit and I’m so scared. I wanna jump off a fucking building holy shit
{edit: posted this earlier to the depression reddit and ooo boy is it not going over well folks I could really use some kind words} {second edit: he said he’d help me out so I’m more relaxed now but I’m still shaken up}

Looks like enough people in the Depression sub told her the truth and she nor the mods there were too happy about it, the post is deleted but undelete managed to capture a bunch of what went down.

https://undelete.pullpush.io/r/depression/comments/1cgafus

https://archive.is/pkIBu

A few samples from the comments:

Spoiler: Text

That's because you're a woman. It doesn't matter what your mental illness or society tells you. You are a woman. This is evidence. Males/men cannot get pregnant. If you were a real man and not some bullshit mental patient who thinks they are a man, this wouldn't be an issue.

Spoiler: Text

It's mental how people just open their legs to stranger and people they don't like without thinking about the consequences and then get shocked when they get pregnant or get a disgusting disease

Spoiler: Text

As much as I disagree with the people who are bashing OP, why are so many people white knighting him? He said he's a trans guy, so he's being treated like one. Anytime a guy gets a girl pregnant, the guy is told that he shouldn't of had sex with the girl. The guy doesn't have the option of abortion. To OP, please realize that you're a human just like the rest of us. I hope you already know to just disregard haters, which I'm sure you are use to being a trans guy. However, don't fall into the habit of having people defend your honor like you are a helpless child. I recommend an abortion pronto. Best of luck.

I like that the last one is the only one to treat her like an actual guy and essentially tell her to suck it up and deal with it, then immediately recommends she get an abortion.

 

[stupid frog]

my Mr Limpy turned blue!!

Alright, this is the second bitch.

Apparently, this is a brand name.

Spoiler: small vs medium

Mr. Limpy, aka The Packy, Mister Softie, is an affordable FTM packer that's been a favorite for many years due to the realistic bulge and budget price. The cyberskin Mr. Limpy packer comes in four sizes. Now available in Pink, Fleshtone and Caramel!​

​

Find out why this classic packer has stood the test of time!​

​

Extra Small​	$12.95​
Small​	$14.95​
Medium​	$16.95​
Large​	$18.95​

 

[Geraldine]

Another one of those almost gets it guys.
Link Archive

No comments yet, but I will check later.

 

[Stan]

Yeah we've discussed him in the SRS thread before. There's a longer explanation he has from 2 years back Link (archive)

Here's my first explanation I had on why I think it's a woman based on his post where he gets clocked by a nurse

Diagnosis of schizophrenia at 5 and on medication also seems very sus to me, especially for someone born in the 80s. Along with spending 6 years in a psychiatric hospital from ~14-20.
The leg amputation thing seems off too. He doesn't mention it at all in his big initial post. Why would he omit such an important detail considering how life-changing that is considering it's such an important consequence of his schizophrenia? He'll comment about eating dirt to kill himself but nothing about having to relearn to walk with a prosthetic? Timeline seems off too. he spent the rest of his teens in the loony bin meaning he had to have had the amputation during that time. That also makes it pretty unlikely.

Sounds like a larper who keeps adding details to me.

I want to believe it’s the angle grinder MtF.

She’s not even started HRT yet, she starts in a couple of weeks (exciting!!!) and I’m so thrilled for her, but so nervous for the changes that might come from that. What if she leaves me for a man? What if she doesn’t love me anymore?

It’s not “exciting!!!” The word she’s looking for is “dreadful!!!”

as to OOP’s questions: yes, he will leave you for a man, and no, he never loved you.

Blatant disinformation about how cross sex hormones affect people, brought to you by Tumblrinos and a doctor that is certainly a tranny too if this conversation actually happened

View attachment 5903079
View attachment 5903080
View attachment 5903081
View attachment 5903083

Lmao I HOPE the informed consent clinics use an ICF that states “you’re doing irreversible damage to your otherwise healthy body because you’re a coomer freak” and then makes the patient sign on a line underwritten “patient/hopeless idiot”.

"What if a different sperm cell fertilized the egg insted of the sperm cell that

Then you would be you, OOP you’d have been someone else.

I/she would've a bf and all good things. I/she would even experience periods have a normal girl childhood and have kids and all..

Shades of Elliott Rodger coming through

I doubt any doctor would ever do this because those forms are basically contracts? If you went through and changed things willy nilly because you felt like it or thought you knew better on a contract, that'd likely render it void and opens you up to much larger legal liability. It was probably that a doctor just monotonely reading it out to them, signing off they understood what was said, and they got scared so invented this scenario and posted it to their tumblr for the validation and soothing of their fear.

Doctors usually feel empowered to point out if a scary side effect on the ICF is very unlikely to occur, especially with a procedure you pretty much need, and especially if there is a reason to rush (eg woman in labor requesting epidural.) And I do know that some
ICFs, especially the one you would sign to get medical abortion, may include cockamamie language about non-risks which are required to be there per state law. but the level of glibness here in the non emergent and non necessary context of signing yourself up for hormones is spurious. I agree it did not happen.

Talk about unrealistic expectations. Who gets this?
Star entertainers with fan mail maybe? OF girls?

Also I'm wondering what feeling valid means.
I suppose my ignorance proves cis privilege?

Attractive women actively looking for partners on PoF or OKC or what have you may get that many inquiries, but they won’t be high effort. (Just a “sup?”) But women like that won’t be on such sites for long if at all because they don’t need to be.

Validation is the worst word to happen to the Left and to psychology. It’s used so many times in different ways I have no idea what it means anymore. when troons use it, they don’t mean valid as in logically valid, but more like validating a parking ticket or a passport. Even then I’m not sure it applies, because these validations are a one-and-done, binary action: I either get though the border checkpoint, or I don’t. Troons need continuous reassurance that they’re heckin valid, to the point that even perceived disapproval is enough to send them into shaking fits and popping their PRNs. But yeah, totally valid people seeking totally valid medical solutions to their valid and deffo real psych issues.

I don't think they care about brain science. After seeing a number of arguments about trans brains, I've come to the conclusion that they're inconsistent and shift goal posts because they are just throwing out whatever they think sounds good for the argument and makes their cognitive dissonance feel better. There isn't any consistency because it's just whatever is needed for the argument at the time. It all comes down to they feel they are trans and that's good enough for them. They don't need any other evidence. They don't really want society at large to cotton onto that though because then people will shut down the surgeries and support and free shit they get when it comes out it's just a wacky belief system with no evidence and only the word of a bunch of mentally ill people.

It’s totally ex post facto. They think being trans is right and good and any evidence they bring supports this predetermined conclusion.

"I must pass, because people keep calling me she", or "I must pass, because I'm wearing a pronoun pin", and the reality of being clocked or misgendered shocks them because they didn't conceptualise that not everyone saw them as a woman.

Ngl wearing a pronoun pin is an invitation go be aggressively clocked. Cis people who have to wear pronouns on their name tags get clocked if they accidentally wear them to the grocery after their shift at the gender mental ward is done for the day.

Ya know, these troons are lucky.

I don’t condone violence blah blah but when gay troons try to go stealth and hook up with drunk straight dudes and end up getting the stuffing beat out of them it’s like…well what did you expect????

They expect people to fuck them out of pity and for political correctness’ sake

Also, late, I know. I’m catching up on the thread .

 

[Dr. Butt]

Thread tax! Wait until she finds out about hair loss and how hard it is to keep weight off/keep muscle on as you age.

Literally just the same thing as when fat women get mad at a normal-sized woman who wants to lose weight. Pooners stop being a Family Guy cutaway about stereotypical females challenge.

 

[I Shidded I Farded I Came]

Find out why this classic packer has stood the test of time!

The tranny's twisted perception of anatomy never fails to astound. It's also probably worth noting for any pooners that may be reading this that many MANY more men are insecure about their height than the size of their dong. Good luck with that. After all by the time anyone can judge you've got it out and the deal has (hopefully...) already been sealed.

Also if you were an actual male instead of a metally ill female being handled with kid gloves you would have caught a lot of shit in school if you were sporting the kind of bulge that the "medium" would give. It's much more likely you'd be insecure about people being able to see it than it being too small. Hiding inconvenient, unexplainable, boners is a skill most boys have to learn in their early teens.

 

[Local Farmer]

View attachment 5928704
Many things to unpack here:

- 15 year old.
- Huge, "WE WILL FUCKING TALK ABOUT THIS AT HOME" vibes from mom. I bet you she said whatever because they were texting about it.
- If you don't have the balls to talk about such a huge matter face to face, then you are probably not mature enough to make a decision like that by yourself. Dad needs to step the fuck in.
- "It's hard to explain but I've done all the research". Which is another way of saying: "Source: trust me bro".
- "I don't think it will help you..." answered with "Well I don't give a fuck, it VILL make me happy and I VILL take ze pill"
- "Also please drive me there and make the appointment for me."

>your decision though

From the way the mother is speaking and the fact her son is a tranny, I’m guessing tranny daddy is not in the picture?

 

[stupid frog]

The tranny's twisted perception of anatomy never fails to astound. It's also probably worth noting for any pooners that may be reading this that many MANY more men are insecure about their height than the size of their dong. Good luck with that. After all by the time anyone can judge you've got it out and the deal has (hopefully...) already been sealed.

Also if you were an actual male instead of a metally ill female being handled with kid gloves you would have caught a lot of shit in school if you were sporting the kind of bulge that the "medium" would give. It's much more likely you'd be insecure about people being able to see it than it being too small. Hiding inconvenient, unexplainable, boners is a skill most boys have to learn in their early teens.

I'm crying LMAO


Annoying video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7L3Tp8niO0

Please someone archive after the first minute hahaha

 

[$5.3 Million Dollars]

Now available in Pink, Fleshtone and Caramel!

No black listed? That's racist! But maybe that's because if you go to their website and check the packer section almost all of them are sold out except the black/dark brown skin tones.

 

[Local Farmer]

View attachment 5930800

Spoiler: Text

Any other women who don't get "female" orgasms?
Venting
Been on HRT for 1/2 years now and my orgasms have
honestly been shit since month 3. Like even worse than pre-HRT. Like "'Il need to check if I ejaculated to make sure ifI even had one or imagined it " level of bad. Everyone always talks about how great full body orgasms feel and at this point l'm just sad and frustrated l'Il likely never experience that.
My hormone levels are okay, it's not my libido or trouble getting an errection, I've played around with toys, anal, nipples, different kinds of porn/erotica, different positions with my partner and alone. Literally nothing works. I've given up and honestly it just sucks, because it's robbing me a big part of the joy of sex.

Wtf trannybros???? I fucked around with the system responsible for sexual arousal and now I can't coom???? How could this happen??

I love how physical intimacy with their partner is the last thing they listed, after porn and sex toys

What a fucking loser

 

[Bookwork]

Alright, this is the second bitch.

Apparently, this is a brand name.

Spoiler: small vs medium

View attachment 5950729

Mr. Limpy, aka The Packy, Mister Softie, is an affordable FTM packer that's been a favorite for many years due to the realistic bulge and budget price. The cyberskin Mr. Limpy packer comes in four sizes. Now available in Pink, Fleshtone and Caramel!​

​

Find out why this classic packer has stood the test of time!​

​

Extra Small​	$12.95​
Small​	$14.95​
Medium​	$16.95​
Large​	$18.95​

So pooners' real L is that they have failed to notice that:

1. no actual man would ever buy anything called Mr. Limpy and
2. by buying Mr. Limpies they are proving they are not actual men.

Obviously, the company should instead start selling the large Hewlett and the larger Green Bay as flasks so the poonettes can learn to suck Fireball out of them on command.

 

[a hapless toad]

I would have said trumpet or sousaphone or trombone, but oboe is definitely the dorkiest of the woodwind/brass instruments.

Every oboist I've ever known has been a girly girl. As for the dorkiest woodwind/brass instrument, I'm torn between the French horn and the flugelhorn...

Who am I kidding, it's definitely the flugelhorn.

(If you're looking for band pooners I suggest you start your search in the percussion section.)

 

[Geraldine]

No black listed? That's racist! But maybe that's because if you go to their website and check the packer section almost all of them are sold out except the black/dark brown skin tones.

Just a question of target market.
It's white women buying them as notional body parts for themselves.
The situation with dildoes would be quite different I expect.

 

[Positron]

I’m pregnant now. From some guy I don’t really care took much abt and I’m not that attracted to, we were just a casual hookup. He told me he had a vasectomy and we used some spermicide shit he had and I trusted him, and now I feel stupid. As a transguy...

You lied to him for calling yourself a man and he lies to you. I call it equal.

Validation is the worst word to happen to the Left and to psychology.

"I'm valid" means "You must follow my orders".