Jace Connors vs The Middle East - A Choose Your Own Adventure thread

[c-no]

G- Drive the vehicle and blow things up while listening to John Cena's wrestling theme then try to find a way to convert your companion into being a full-on Murican lady and hit on her.

 

[Zeorus]

D. Make that bitch pay for turning down your Freedom Shaft.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

E

Why didn't we do this before?

 

[Burned Man]

E and F Call in an airstrike full of muhreens to take out the tangos and give you an audience to off to.

 

[Surtur]

G Cry for mommy

 

[Randall Fragg]

A: OVERKILL!

 

[Seattle Trip to Neverfree]

"Watch this" you say.

You take our your walkie talkie and speak into the receiver. "I need a Code 420 on these co-coordinates".

"Roger that, Commander Stryker. Good to hear your voice again".

You then lie in wait the drone of the United States Marine Paratrooper dropships flying overhead. The roar is enormous and the sight overwhelming. Hundreds of marines dropping from the sky, dropping grenades and firing as they float down onto the base.

"let's go!", you cry, as you and BurqaBabe jump into the jeep and fang it towards the base, firing your turret at any turbans in your way.

You gun it to the main building in the compound and prepare to blast your way. you can tell Tyce is inside because Tyce has graffitied all over the front, including his calling tag . How do you plan on doing it?

A) Breach and clear through the front door.
B) climb to the roof and work your way down
C) send in the marines, then take all the credit.
D) have them just bomb the building from the air.
E) players choice

 

[c-no]

E- Break through a window with deagles in hand and start shooting the place up like Max Payne, doing jumping shots. Then try to find Tyce before the enemy does something like take away his jenkem.

 

[Konstantinos]

D - Just have them bomb the building while you, BurqaBabe and the marines are still inside. Surely nothing bad will happen.

 

[Seattle Trip to Neverfree]

You take a few drops of THC and dive through the front door, deagle in each hand. Time slows down as you blast the two guards in the mezzanine. You begin strafing left and right as you blow away guard after guard after guard. A voice in your head echoes 'Monster Kill' after your sixth kill. In a short period of time, all the guards on the ground floor are dead, and you're standing in the middle of a courtyard.

"Took you long enough to get here, Commander", a familiar voice rings out from above. You turn to see Tyce Andrews on the balcony above you, flanked by Odumba bin Laden and his elite squad of Commienazi Terrorist bodyguards. You point your deagles at Tyce and Odumba, whose bodyguards respond by pointing their guns at you.

"Dont be so hasty to die, Jace. You're outgunned and we have the high ground."

"Surrender Tyce, it's over. I have the entire marine corps cleaning up your operation outside. You can't win. Surrender and I will grant you mercy"

He laughs, and throws you a bag of Doritos. "You would really kill an old friend, Jace? Here, have a snack, you must be hungry from all that killing."

A) Eat the Doritos
B) Refuse the Doritos
C) Shoot them and take cover
D) flee the room and radio in all free marines to come support your assault
E) Shit your pants out of fear
F) Player option

 

[exball]

F, light a blunt and say "I never asked for this."

 

[Saney]

F. Try and extort Tyce for more Doritos.
Edit: And some Mountain Dew.

 

[Burned Man]

F. Try and extort Tyce for more Doritos.

Can't eat Doritos without some Mountain Dew code red now can you?

 

[Saney]

Can't eat Doritos without some Mountain Dew code red now can you?

Good point. Better fix that.

 

[Seattle Trip to Neverfree]

"Are you kidding me Tyce? Doritos but no Code Red Mountain Dew? You've gone soft, or mental."

He smirks, and throws a bottle of Mountain Dew down. You open it to take a refreshing sip and to prepare your mouth for the glorious Doritos, but it sprays you in the face, covering your sunglasses and blinding you momentarily. His guards open fire on you as he and Odumba leave for their super sekrit bunker. You manage to dive behind some shallow cover, but not before a bullet slams into your forehead...

 

[Saney]

 

[kagayaki]

Jace is dead?

 

[Burned Man]

"Are you kidding me Tyce? Doritos but no Code Red Mountain Dew? You've gone soft, or mental."

He smirks, and throws a bottle of Mountain Dew down. You open it to take a refreshing sip and to prepare your mouth for the glorious Doritos, but it sprays you in the face, covering your sunglasses and blinding you momentarily. His guards open fire on you as he and Odumba leave for their super sekrit bunker. You manage to dive behind some shallow cover, but not before a bullet slams into your forehead...

WOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!! That's false flag intel. I'm the Commander and I get to say what happens. I didn't get hit by no gay bullet that's unrealistic. I tactically parkoured out of the bullets way into cover like John Cena would have done.

I imagine that is what is going on through his brain as he dies.

 

[Saney]

Jace is dead?

If that's the case, I'd just like to point out that...it's all @Burned Man 's fault for suggesting Mountain Dew.

 

[Burned Man]

If that's the case, I'd just like to point out that...it's all @Burned Man 's fault for suggesting Mountain Dew.

My bad. I just thought Jace was parched and needed to do the dew. He has been stuck in the desert this whole time.