DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Heckler1 said:
Like I think he'll eventually start talking about trips he never went on and people he never actually met.
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I would argue he's already done this with huge swaths of his life that no one is familiar with, so just about everything leading up to his involvement with the FGC. To hear him tell it he was the Head Dick on Campus in high school and in college somehow managed to be president of Animal House and maintain a flawless GPA and bang every broad with double dees he set his eyes on.

That not a single person from his high school or college years has ever come forward to talk about Phil goes to show you exactly how much of an impact he makes on people in meatspace. He's just another meek doughy white guy with a bad goatee. He's a dime a baker's dozen. No one pays him a second thought. No one ever has. And no one ever will.
 
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Leon Breitling said:
The anger and defensiveness for the first question is astounding. It was just a joke, but it gets a "You're a fucking idiot" in reply. You really can't just play along? "Sure, maybe I should start now, people could pay big money for the Italian Stallion."
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DSP has zero sense of humor and narcissists lack the capacity to be self-deprecating.

He's like an unfunny version of Drax from GotG; everything in chat is 100% literal.

Freshtodeath said:
do you think dsp is illiterate in sense of photography. His photos are always awful. That pic jasper looks terrified of him. Last like 3 photos of kat she is just staring into her monitor.
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Not just photography; I don't think DSP can read body language. The Kat (girlfriend) reveal was a literal hostage video and he thought it was good enough to put on his channel.
 
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Comma said:
I can't believe how shamelessly obnoxious his Minecraft streams now are by default. It's like something from another universe.

With each passing day I'm getting more disgusted by Twitch as a company and their employees (streamers) preying on children and people who are obviously mentally unstable who spend vast amounts of money in exchange for fake attention/support, and DarksydePhil is one of the major reasons for that.

Absolutely fucking vile and disgusting.
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Sodapoppin apparently once called twitch a 'glorified mental hospital', and he's not wrong. Except maybe on the 'hospital' part, it's more just a pit. There are exceptions of course, you do have a small percentage of viewers that aren't kids or mentally unstable, and you have a small percentage of streamers who do simply want to create a community and have a place for people to belong. But the majority of streamers are people like Phil (to a lesser degree). They don't give two fucks and simply give desperate people some sad compensation for cash in the form of... whatever they do. And when your clientele consists of mostly dumb kids or the adult mental equivalent of one, and you don't offer them any protection from their own stupidity, Twitch is the result. Vulnerable people being exploited by twats who are good at selling illusions and mirages. With the Magnum Opus being none other than our boy Philippo Fuckbert who scams retards daily.
 
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Salubrious said:
Not just photography; I don't think DSP can read body language. The Kat (girlfriend) reveal was a literal hostage video and he thought it was good enough to put on his channel.
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Yeah, the pictures of the Kat and the Cat aren't for anyone but us detractors. They're taken in such a clinical way that they look like evidence instead of something joyful. They aren't happy moments. They aren't anything to remember. They're the back of a woman's empty head. There's no love in any of the pictures with Jasper, he's either staring at Phil or asleep. And Kat, oof, the last pictures they took together where she looks happy were in May 2018.

It's a dying money golem trying to convince us he's a normal human.
 
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bearsintrees said:
Yeah, the pictures of the Kat and the Cat aren't for anyone but us detractors. They're taken in such a clinical way that they look like evidence instead of something joyful. They aren't happy moments. They aren't anything to remember. They're the back of a woman's empty head. There's no love in any of the pictures with Jasper, he's either staring at Phil or asleep. And Kat, oof, the last pictures they took together where she looks happy were in May 2018.

It's a dying money golem trying to convince us he's a normal human.
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The great irony being the DSP claimed that they've had Jasper since before the wedding, so if the intent was to prove to the detractors that Kat didn't leave him already, he failed miserably. There's no way to date when that picture took place.

Also as you said, who the hell posts a picture of the back of their spouse's head? It's not even like an action shot from the side; we can't even tell if it's Kat or not. Even if it is Kat, it looks like she doesn't even know someone is taking a picture of her.
 
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Heckler1 said:
I wonder when Phi will eventually start devolving from just retconning his past to outright inventing it out of lonely lunacy? Like I think he'll eventually start talking about trips he never went on and people he never actually met. Because his life is so passive and he never goes out I don't think he actually has the opportunity to actually meet people or have new experiences, so I gotta think he'll eventually fully commit to just being the sad mad hermit he is destined to be. Like a tommy tooter with less pedophillia and trash eating.
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He's like an old fart with dementia at this point where it's like "Yeah, okay Grandpa whatever you say haha...''

Such a boring bumbling idiot at this point knowing him for a few years. Makes me want to avoid more Phils in the future. Stories of shitting and barfing at the same time like a South Park episode, how you smoked weed in college and avoided being fined, or how you got with so many fine honeys in highschool, because I'm just going to 360 walkaway from you at that point.

These aren't stories you share to even show how much you have matured in your 37s, or how you did so much with your life because most what Phil has achieved in his life, most have done in their early 20s. Fuck maybe even highschool. He hasn't evolved; absolutely stunted that he still has grade school levels of humor.

Can't have a conversation with him at this point because he has nothing going for him, no passion or ambitions, and he will only drag you down. The most exciting thing to him is food, money, and posting his cats on instagram. Who would want to surround themselves with someone like that?
 
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bearsintrees said:
I'm so weirded out by Kat playing games all day in Leanna's old room on a 20 inch monitor stuffed in a corner with no headphones when she has a 60 inch tv, full surround sound, and 10 people worth of couches to sit on in the living room. Why are these two so fundamentally odd?
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I mean it is possible she could move her ps4 to downstairs, but that's also Philips area for when he wants to lounge, get drunk, and watch T.V. Almost feels like she's being jailed in there as a way of exercising control.
 
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SkippyLongbottom said:
I mean it is possible she could move her ps4 to downstairs, but that's also Philips area for when he wants to lounge, get drunk, and watch T.V. Almost feels like she's being jailed in there as a way of exercising control.
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Well she knew what she sign up for living and having a relationship with Phil. She gets no sympathy for me.
 
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bearsintrees said:
I'm so weirded out by Kat playing games all day in Leanna's old room on a 20 inch monitor stuffed in a corner with no headphones when she has a 60 inch tv, full surround sound, and 10 people worth of couches to sit on in the living room. Why are these two so fundamentally odd?
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I hate to make speculation, because as I've said in the past that you don't have to speculate for a guy like DSP because what he says alone is enough, but I feel like I have to do it here.

Warning: The following is purely speculation with no proof on my part:





That monitor has to be one of Leanna's old monitors right? Kat's only lived with DSP for two years; there's no way that monitor was bought in or after 2017 and I can't imagine Kat dragged it across the country with her. You can literally buy a 32" TV for $99 now, and we know DSP isn't shy about spending money. I can't fathom a good reason why Kat would be using a monitor that old even if the picture isn't recent.
 
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Salubrious said:
I hate to make speculation, because as I've said in the past that you don't have to speculate for a guy like DSP because what he says alone is enough, but I feel like I have to do it here.

Warning: The following is purely speculation with no proof on my part:





That monitor has to be one of Leanna's old monitors right? Kat's only lived with DSP for two years; there's no way that monitor was bought in or after 2017 and I can't imagine Kat dragged it across the country with her. You can literally buy a 32" TV for $99 now, and we know DSP isn't shy about spending money. I can't fathom a good reason why Kat would be using a monitor that old even if the picture isn't recent.
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I can't find pics of Leanna's old setup, but that's definitely her old desk. And the monitor has been there since the first time Kat set up her PC, before we'd even seen her face.
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But like you said, it's fucking baffling why Kat would still be using this tiny, shitty thing. That being said, there's a calendar hung on the wall in the most recent pic that wasn't there in the last pic from December, so I'm inclined to say this one's newer. It's weird.
 
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Freshtodeath said:
do you think dsp is illiterate in sense of photography. His photos are always awful. That pic jasper looks terrified of him. Last like 3 photos of kat she is just staring into her monitor.
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His shot choice in the latest creepy photo is sort of perfect in how it betrays his own intentions of encapsulating the most important acquisitions (that remarkably have a pulse for a change) in his life. He chose to show off either a damp mop rigged on a chair or it is indeed the back of Katherine's head and J2K, when any normal functioning hughmun would have opted to suggest a casual group shot and present the world with a nice uniformal view of the happy Modern Era Family.

Instead what we get framed and bubbling to the surface is the sad reality. A wife who doesn't want to participate in the shitshow (not that I blame her) or even superficially incentivize any reason at all to let them keep on living in that house by way of a counterfeit smile for the camera - the very thing Boss Hogg cried about for months at a time during muh tACKses season. A wife who refuses to even look at her husband in order to assist in his carny routine. With Jasper almost looking like he's been placed via forced perspective to appear more prominent than Katherine because right now in Transylburnellvania he is in fact a far more relevant and willing pitybux venture to the streams than she is.

He's potentially the most lucrative bauble he's ever had to shake on camera and as someone else on here put it, it only took Phil a decade to figure out people on the internet like cats.. it might only be 18 months before he remembers Jasper needs a staycation at the vets and its chat's honor and privilege to pick up the tab. Indeed The Cat has vanquished The Horse for the foreseeable future as headline support on Burnell Productions hit sitcom I'm Gonna Be Honest.
 
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Salubrious said:
Also as you said, who the hell posts a picture of the back of their spouse's head? It's not even like an action shot from the side; we can't even tell if it's Kat or not. Even if it is Kat, it looks like she doesn't even know someone is taking a picture of her.
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In my head the creeper shots started like this. After being called a racoon-eyed horse face Kat declared "i'm never showing my face online again." Phil went into a panic because every few months he has to prove Kat hasn't left yet. Using his love of semantics he snapped a creeper shot, asked if he could post it (defending his decision with said semantics,) and Kat rolled her eyes at the bullshit immaturity and said fine.

Like many thing we'll probably never know the truth so take a page from Phil and just make something up.
 
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