Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

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How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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If Godzilla vs. King Kong going to streaming pisses him off hard, wait til you see him go nuclear if Disney decides to dump Black Widow on Disney+. That would be such a treat to have.
I'm not so sure seeing as marvel/disney is the one constantly producing the particular brand of slop he loves to consoom. If anything I expect tweets praising them for "being the only light in this dim existence for providing entertainment in these trying times" and how they are great for pumping out the latest marvel fix why keeping everyone safe by not putting it in theaters UNLIKE NOLAN THAT IS LITERALLY KILLING HUNDREDS.

Or something around those lines. Remember: Loyalty to Disney Loyalty to the Brand Loyalty is Salvation Loyalty is Life.
 
Chris is fucking retarded. Literally. “What else can I do to earn your support?” Make something I’m interested in or want enough to pay for it. If you’re dumb enough to invest “tons of money and time” to create unwanted content while you admit you just took on more financial obligations than you can handle, that’s a you problem. Goddamn this family is fucking stupid!
Problem: wheel is not turning.
Engineer: the solution is to beg for help.
Problem: wheel is still not turning.
Engineer: I'll beg some more.
Problem: wheel is still not turning.
Engineer: I'll beg still some more.
Problem: wheel is still not turning.
Engineer: what the fuck do you want e-begging is all I know how to do!!!!!
 
But but but The Democrats are the party for cultural advancement! They will bail out all cinemas!

When challenged for his hypocracy, Bobby went into what his opponents called "hyperventilating tone". Here is the unedited screenshot to show how huffy he is, and for the ease of reading I'll post the text following this.
View attachment 1751193
View attachment 1751196

In other words, the director (auteur) has no right stipulating how his work should be shown; doing so is just him being "pretentious". Bobby knows more about the *nature* of a certain film more so than the studio that release it.

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As if anyone needs an excuse to dislike Bob.

+ + + +
Thanksgiving chez Le Chippa:
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Why do Bahstanians love to slather savory foods with candies or soda?
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It is not just you who needs a "bigger safety blanket"; everybody does. And you need a damn good reason (hint: your blu-ray raffle draw and your "skanking" to your theme song are not) to persuade people to give up their own safety blanket for your benefit.

Bobby can find nothing to thank for, so he cracks open a long-expired can of platitudes.
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Our PhD in Communication is on a hard place again:
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It seems "Learn to Code" isn't a viable path if you are a troon. Must be that pesky thing called "transphobia"
OH good lord that Chippa turkey...
THAT'S NOT HOW SKEWERS WORK THAT'S NOT HOW TRUSSING WORKS THERE'S TOO MUCH STUFFING AND THERE IS NO RACK IN THAT PAN
(yeah ok i get it lots of people don't put a rack in a turkey roasting pan but shit son you want boiled turkey? Cuz that's exactly how you get boiled turkey)
PLUS IT'S CRAZY-OVERCOOKED
seriously that breast looks drier than the sahara

It's not quite on par with Brother Bob's Mountain Dew Abomination or Sriracha Hot Sauce Meltdown, but damn, it is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. I guess failing at cooking runs in the family.
 
Thanksgiving chez Le Chippa:
View attachment 1751168
I am culinarily inclined, having done foh and boh work, and this is fucking vile. Anyone bringing that shit into my house would get their ass kicked (keeping in mind that my tail strikes with the force of a sledgehammer and my serrated teeth are as sharp as steak knives [Planet Earth 2 is fantastic])
As @Koby_Fish said; too much stuffing, that's not how you use skewers and get the fucking bird off the bottom of the fucking pan, if not by rack then at least put some root veg underneath, and it looks like fucking dry shit. Chris Chipman or whoever "cooked" this is worse than Bobbyboy in my eyes.
This is a travesty.
 
Not even. Bob's my senior, but not by much, so I was around for the same console war, and the Sony vs. Nintendo one that came after. Even in elementary school the debate was about which machines was actually superior, not which system was "good". As long as the box let you control the images on the screen it was good.

Even in second grade anyone who refused to play games on the "other" machine was some kind of weirdo. Everyone had their favorite, but but you'd just get laughed at if you thought people needed to "pick a side".


You're not thinking like the intended audience.

Examine the bed from the bug-man consoomer mindset:
View attachment 1749416
Such utility will be necessary in the Superior Future. Such extravagant waste of space as depicted in this image will be outlawed. The largest available pod will be just wide enough to accommodate this bed, and long enough to leave walking space to access the media viewing seats while using your wall-mounted screen.

The hole in the floor for you to shit in will be right beside the bed. The flat part above the figurine storage space is where your microwave goes, just beneath the window your amazon goods are flown in through.
That bed looks like a setpiece from TNG. All it's missing is a bunch of random ass space panels spitting out information.

It also fails in everything it does, how can you watch TV in bed when chairs are blocking your line of sight? How can those frontal chairs even be comfortable when they're that upright? The Recliner looks like ass because it doesn't actually recline, your feet would be hanging off the edge of it.
 
What was that saying from Glengarry Glen Ross.... Always be begging? Is that a pop culture reference the chipmans will get?
chipman beg.png
 
I am culinarily inclined, having done foh and boh work, and this is fucking vile. Anyone bringing that shit into my house would get their ass kicked (keeping in mind that my tail strikes with the force of a sledgehammer and my serrated teeth are as sharp as steak knives [Planet Earth 2 is fantastic])
As @Koby_Fish said; too much stuffing, that's not how you use skewers and get the fucking bird off the bottom of the fucking pan, if not by rack then at least put some root veg underneath, and it looks like fucking dry shit. Chris Chipman or whoever "cooked" this is worse than Bobbyboy in my eyes.
This is a travesty.
well not only that, if they wanted MORE stuffing, it's called doing a separate pan and throwing extra stuffing in it. S'not hard.
 
Jesus Fucking Christ.

Tell me you fuckers don't base your Thanksgiving meals on incinerated regret and butter.

You know when that chick who is 1/128th Arapahoe says you are murdering her soul? She's got a fucking point.

Edit: Bob is murdering mine and I only come there for Baseball.
 
*looks at how the turkey started out, FACEDESK FOREVER*
Oh for the love of pete. Now that I see how it started out, I know exactly what went wrong.

For starters: butter goes UNDER the skin. Sure you can rub some over top, but NOT leave it as square pats when you do that. It's actually better to NOT butter the top of the skin, but have it all under the skin instead. It's easy enough to slide a dull dinner knife between the breast and the skin at the cavity opening and wiggle it around to create a pocket on each side of the breast for the butter (maybe mixed with some sage and thyme or poultry seasoning), then stuff the butter under that. Any turkey-cavity fat that I have, I place in after to hold the butter in place because that takes longer to melt. It's also possible to loosen the skin around the thigh/drumstick and stick butter between the skin and meat there. Heck, sometimes I go whole hog and make pockets in the loose skin of the wings. Plus I always go under the skin of the back of the turkey from the neck side and put saged butter up in there, too.

God I HOPE that's pepper on the top of the bird and on the butter... (AND WHY IN THE FUCK IS DEEP WOODS OFF IN THE DAMN KITCHEN ON THE COUNTER WHERE PEOPLE COOK?)

Who taught these spergs how to sew a turkey shut? Not only is that a safety hazard the way the tips of the skewers are exposed, but since they're so incredibly poorly anchored it's no wonder it didn't stay together. The most effective way is to have the ends of the skewers buried into the actual meat. I go one step further and use the skewer itself to hold the skin of the breast and the bottom skin together as if I was sewing (but using the skewer as the thread) instead of bothering with fucking twine and then jamming the pointy end into the lower part of the breast as far as I can make it go to hold it secure AND IT FUCKING WORKS. In this way I can close off a turkey cavity with only two skewers, but I don't even bother stuffing it anyway as my purpose is instead to close off the skin of the breast at the cavity opening so all the butter doesn't drain out. I do pretty much the same with the neck side on the back of the turkey, although up there I'll put any giblets (except the neck) that came with the turkey in the cavity above the breast, along with more butter as this keeps the breast moist. I can just do dressing in a separate pan or stovetop stuffing on.........hear me out...... a pot on the stove.

Also LOL at the one lone feather bit sticking out of the wing.
 
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*looks at how the turkey started out, FACEDESK FOREVER*
Oh for the love of pete. Now that I see how it started out, I know exactly what went wrong.

For starters: butter goes UNDER the skin. Sure you can rub some over top, but NOT leave it as square pats when you do that. It's actually better to NOT butter the top of the skin, but have it all under the skin instead. It's easy enough to slide a dull dinner knife between the breast and the skin at the cavity opening and wiggle it around to create a pocket for the butter (maybe mixed with some sage and thyme or poultry seasoning), then stuff the butter under that. Any turkey-cavity fat that I have, I place in after to hold the butter in place because that takes longer to melt. It's also possible to loosen the skin around the thigh/drumstick and stick butter between the skin and meat there. Heck, sometimes I go whole hog and make pockets in the loose skin of the wings. Plus I always go under the skin of the back of the turkey from the neck side and put saged butter up in there, too.

God I HOPE that's pepper on the top of the bird and on the butter... (AND WHY IN THE FUCK IS DEEP WOODS OFF IN THE DAMN KITCHEN ON THE COUNTER WHERE PEOPLE COOK?)

Who taught these spergs how to sew a turkey shut? Not only is that a safety hazard the way the tips of the skewers are exposed, but since they're so incredibly poorly anchored it's no wonder it didn't stay together. The most effective way is to have the ends of the skewers buried into the actual meat. I go one step further and use the skewer itself to hold the skin of the breast and the bottom skin together as if I was sewing (but using the skewer as the thread) instead of bothering with fucking twine and then jamming the pointy end into the lower part of the breast as far as I can make it go to hold it secure AND IT FUCKING WORKS. In this way I can close off a turkey cavity with only two skewers, but I don't even bother stuffing it anyway as my purpose is instead to close off the skin of the breast at the cavity opening so all the butter doesn't drain out. I do pretty much the same with the neck side on the back of the turkey, although up there I'll put any giblets (except the neck) that came with the turkey in the cavity above the breast, along with more butter as this keeps the breast moist. I can just do dressing in a separate pan or stovetop stuffing on.........hear me out...... a pot on the stove.

Also LOL at the one lone feather bit sticking out of the wing.
Dude, do you need an intervention?

You didn't even mention Cranberries.
 
Dude, do you need an intervention?

You didn't even mention Cranberries.
cranberries man, i just crack open a can of Ocean Spray whole berry sauce and I'm gucci.
Nah, it's the Chips that need the intervention. Mostly to keep them from putting stupid crap on the counter and leaving it there. Seeing that bug spray there and the lysol just activates my autisms.
 
cranberries man, i just crack open a can of Ocean Spray whole berry sauce and I'm gucci.
Nah, it's the Chips that need the intervention. Mostly to keep them from putting stupid crap on the counter and leaving it there. Seeing that bug spray there and the lysol just activates my autisms.
They will find their own zero point.

Pecan Pie, now that's different.

Thanksgiving is weird. But, happy pie day my dudes.
 
Well, according to this video about 18th Century cooking, putting stuffing into a bird before you cook it is a relic of the time when birds used to be roasted over an open fire - that way, the stuffing and juices from the bird would drip down, keeping the bird moist. It's generally agreed now that stuffing a bird isn't good when you're baking the bird in an oven, and there are even people who think it's dangerous because the interior of the bird doesn't reach as high a temperature.

How is it that dirt peasants from 200 years ago who literally lived in houses built from clay and dead trees knew more about cooking than the Chipman clan does with all of its access to modern technology?
 
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