The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[0 0]

Real feminine biceps there bud

 

[Law]

He's almost getting that weird upper arm fat that some women get post-partum.
But before he gets excited, we all know its just some extra queso calories that his wrecked body is desperately looking to store somewhere.
Also that tattoo is cultural appropriation, please cancel this monstrous white Karen, block and stay safe.

 

[break these cuffs]

(how do they water all these animals?)

I was wondering this myself. Westcliffe, Silver Cliff, and the surrounding areas are known as the Wet Mountain Valley. They're in a basin fill aquifer. The Tranch is in the Sangre de Cristo water district and allowed a well with a maximum pump output of 15gpm. That's a quite a bit. Allowed uses do include livestock and outdoor watering in their zone.

Alpacas drink a 2-5gal per day and sheep 2-4. I forget how many sheep there are, but there is more than enough well capacity in their water rights even with some generous overestimates on how much the livestock need. The Tranchers themselves have reduced their water requirements by infrequently showering.

 

[Ghostse]

What kind of base return do you get on sheep? A quick search shows the prices are generally low - generic lambs are around $100 and young cisgender female shep are like $200. That is not a lot of money. If your overhead is low and volume high, it's probably not gonna lose you money, but if you have to feed the things from the day they're born, with no pasture to graze on, I can't believe there's any margin left.

The internet says a grown (biological) female shep eats about 5 pounds of hay per day. Hay is cheap, my breakdown gives a rough cost of ~5 cents per pound (working from ~$100 per ton, the actual average is about ~120 so this is conservative). Still, by the time you feed a sheep for a year, you've spent close to $100 and that's just on hay. I would imagine sheep need shots and medicine, water (how do they water all these animals?), and more significantly, labor - also known as "time is money".

Based on this, it would seem there's virtually no return here at the lowest level (wholesaling the animals themselves). You could sell the lambs as soon as possible, so that you didn't incur feeding costs, but even then 1 lamb would only about pay for the hay that 1 sheep eats in a year. Retail lamb cuts are expensive, but that involves a lot of butchery ($$$ or time) and retailing the meat yourself in a short window. Wholesaling the meat isn't gonna get you $10/lb, and you'll still need those connections to do it.

Anyways, just some autism here, I'm always interested in the economics of various ventures. Personally I would never spend all day fucking with sheep to make a couple bucks, considering you can make $200 a day at a fairly standard job without the responsibility of having a herd of filthy animals.

When raised in places that aren't THE GODDAMN FUCKING DESERT you've further reduced to a moon-like dustbowl, the hay is free or nearly free. The only reason you'd raise sheep in a place where you have to pay for every fucking calorie like a fucking moron would be utility - you either raise them as food (so you don't make money, but you eat lamb without spending on lamb - you reduce your costs. Sheep raise & butcher quicker than cows) or utility (raise them to be shornfor wool).
My guess is they hope to use the Alpaca wool channels to pedal custom tranny wool.

 

[Law]

The Tranchers themselves have reduced their water requirements by infrequently showering.

Can you blame them? The pile of milk crates and pallet wood that Jarrod ape-slapped together looks like a muddy, splintery death trap.

 

[AnOminous]

Based on this, it would seem there's virtually no return here at the lowest level (wholesaling the animals themselves). You could sell the lambs as soon as possible, so that you didn't incur feeding costs, but even then 1 lamb would only about pay for the hay that 1 sheep eats in a year. Retail lamb cuts are expensive, but that involves a lot of butchery ($$$ or time) and retailing the meat yourself in a short window. Wholesaling the meat isn't gonna get you $10/lb, and you'll still need those connections to do it.

Considering they almost certainly are fucking them, which is why they immediately separate them from their mothers, since they hate females so much they even hate females of other species, they probably get fleshlight level values out of these sheep which they are ALMOST CERTAINLY FUCKING.

 

[Trianon]

Anyways, just some autism here, I'm always interested in the economics of various ventures. Personally I would never spend all day fucking with sheep to make a couple bucks, considering you can make $200 a day at a fairly standard job without the responsibility of having a herd of filthy animals.

They're even kind of entry-level for livestock shows. Little kids CAN make bank on them by winning shows and getting scholarship money through 4-H or county and state fairs. That's about it.

 

[Angel Phish]

I wonder how much those lambs weigh. A pregnant ewe requires a hell of a lot of calories to drop healthy lambs, it's an entirely specialized diet. If you feed them enough with the right supplements you can get triplets or even quadruplets and a fairly fat mama ewe afterwards. If you don't, the ewe looks emaciated and the lambs, if they survive, will be significantly smaller.
This of course is all after you've controlled who is breeding to who at what time so you don't end up with encephalitic lambs because the ram keeps fucking his own spawn.
Basically, a real livestock farmer knows the age, sex, breed, and weight of every animal in their herd, what immunizations they've had, who can be bred to who, how many offspring they can expect and when, even what offspring they've had in the past and how many survived. All of this helps them manage their stock to produce animals that can be sold to market because they're not a shivering pile of disease and genetic malformations, provided they don't die of preventable complications before then.
How much of all that do you think the lovely ladies of the indomitable Tenacious Unicorn Ranch are following through with?

 

[voidBits]

Personally I would never spend all day fucking with sheep to make a couple bucks, considering you can make $200 a day at a fairly standard job without the responsibility of having a herd of filthy animals.

You're making a category error. These aren't livestock
They're set dressing on a Potemkin Tranch
Their function is to tug the heartstrings of the paypigs the Tranch Davidians are fleecing.
(In far more efficient manner than they're fleecing the ranch stock)

This whole thing is nothing more than a grift, and once that's realised so much of the insanity makes a twisted sense

 

[AnOminous]

Their function is to tug the heartstrings of the paypigs the Tranch Davidians are fleecing.

The heartstrings should be the ones an actually sane person would feel for these poor abused animals getting slowly tortured to death by disgusting perverted scum.

 

[Ghostse]

How much of all that do you think the lovely ladies of the indomitable Tenacious Unicorn Ranch are following through with?

I put as much effort into this shop as the tranchers do into passing as women

 

[Miss Misery]

outdoor watering in their zone.

They can only irrigate one acre of the 36, which is why they're not growing anything. (Although one acre would make a pretty nice vegetable garden.)

 

[Hell yeah dude]

"healthy snacks"

Spoiler

x

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

"healthy snacks"
View attachment 2257198

Spoiler

View attachment 2257199

x

This is some white trash trailer park bullshit man, goldfish crackers and gas station sugar cookies.

All that's missing here is hotdogs with white bread slices as buns and only ketchup as a topping.

 

[Tactical Wizard]

View attachment 2256814

I put as much effort into this shop as the tranchers do into passing as women

You should at least the change the bowtie. That is like the least ancappiest thing ever to say.

That's like photoshopping a picture of Hitler with his arm around an ultra-orthodox rabbi who's wearing a hammer and sickle pin.

 

[Boris Blank's glass eye]

You should at least the change the bowtie. That is like the least ancappiest thing ever to say.

That's like photoshopping a picture of Hitler with his arm around an ultra-orthodox rabbi who's wearing a hammer and sickle pin.

Making it the perfect leftist meme. That was the goal, wasn't it?

 

[Old Fart]

Mr. AnOminous, could you give Radio Kiwi a description of the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch in two words?

useless shit

Thank you very much, back to the studio.

 

[The Final Troondown]

It's worse than that
I started a detailed post on this yesterday after those tweets went up, listing all that was wrong with the fence and gate but couldn't face their insanity anymore
Even now I feel my brain shutting down with the lunacy of how they fuck everything they touch

There's loads wrong with that fencing but one of the major issues is no proper straining posts and cos of that the fence looks far too slack
It's a shit job and a waste of money that will need remedial work by the summers end

Spoiler: Livestock fencing lmao

View attachment 2252357View attachment 2252358View attachment 2252360View attachment 2252361

Can’t wait to hear how Earl snuck in under cover of darkness and wrapped several alpaca in barbed wire

Literally nothing is done right, ever, and no one cares to learn. Not a one!! That’s like the exact opposite of human nature, I just fundamentally can’t understand not being at least CURIOUS how to build stairs or a fence, shit that’s been sussed out by Homo sapiens for unknown thousands of years. Grilling fucking meat!! They can’t do it!! Lazy, yes, incompetent, without a doubt, but more than anything it’s the lack of curiosity that gets me. (I wonder how bad are they fucking up their taxes? IRS might take down TUR before they get another chance to accidentally burn the place down.)

It wouldn’t even take that much in terms of learning
You could build that kind of staircase with a big block of lumber, a marker pen and a chainsaw with some hardcoat for weather resistance in an afternoon

Wait aren't sheep infamous for stripping pastures of grass barren? I thought that's why real ranchers and Cowboys (UK the ones who actually knew how to raise livestock and live off the land) had a grudge against farmers who raised sheep?

Sheep are good in areas like highlands where land is cheap and you get heavy rainfall to support greenery because they can live off just about anything that’ll grow on that kind of environment
It’s why they’re basically synonymous with wales/Scottish highlands/New Zealand
But the tranch is arid as shit and as such sucks for raising any kind of grazers

if they wanted to raise livestock their best bet would have been pigs
They will go through bone like buttah hence the expressio

 

[Prolego]

What kind of base return do you get on sheep? A quick search shows the prices are generally low - generic lambs are around $100 and young cisgender female shep are like $200. That is not a lot of money. If your overhead is low and volume high, it's probably not gonna lose you money, but if you have to feed the things from the day they're born, with no pasture to graze on, I can't believe there's any margin left.

The internet says a grown (biological) female shep eats about 5 pounds of hay per day. Hay is cheap, my breakdown gives a rough cost of ~5 cents per pound (working from ~$100 per ton, the actual average is about ~120 so this is conservative). Still, by the time you feed a sheep for a year, you've spent close to $100 and that's just on hay. I would imagine sheep need shots and medicine, water (how do they water all these animals?), and more significantly, labor - also known as "time is money".

Based on this, it would seem there's virtually no return here at the lowest level (wholesaling the animals themselves). You could sell the lambs as soon as possible, so that you didn't incur feeding costs, but even then 1 lamb would only about pay for the hay that 1 sheep eats in a year. Retail lamb cuts are expensive, but that involves a lot of butchery ($$$ or time) and retailing the meat yourself in a short window. Wholesaling the meat isn't gonna get you $10/lb, and you'll still need those connections to do it.

Anyways, just some autism here, I'm always interested in the economics of various ventures. Personally I would never spend all day fucking with sheep to make a couple bucks, considering you can make $200 a day at a fairly standard job without the responsibility of having a herd of filthy animals.

Sheep farming is always marginally profitable. If you've got some nice flat fertile land that you can drive tractors over when necessary, most people grow crops. If on the other hand you own land that is hilly, rocky and otherwise difficult to manage then sheep are a way of extracing some income from it. They can harvest whatever grows where the tractor can't reach. That's why you see a lot of sheep on e.g. the Welsh hills and in Greece and Turkey. Provided you manage your stock levels so that they eat roughly what grows every year then you can make a living of sorts, but you'll never be rich.

As a rough ball-park figure, a ewe will cost about £/$/€ 100 a year to keep, and a lamb will sell for about 100. So your profitability lies in maximising the number of lambs per ewe. Traditionally most farmers aimed for 2, but would settle for 1.5-1.7. So a flock of 100 ewes will give you an income of 6,000 a year before you take off farm overheads. But that assumes free food a lot of the year from grazing or from cutting hay for winter. Once you start buying that in then you're starting to hit alpaca levels of profitability.

There's a nice discussion from some real farmers here. In short, flipping burgers at McD will leave you better off

 

[Yamamura]

"healthy snacks"
View attachment 2257198

Spoiler

View attachment 2257199

x

Well, I suppose this explains their grocery shopping choices at costco. For a bunch of dainty "laydees" even a bunch of frat dudes probably have a better understanding of a nutritional diet than they do. They're eating nothing but processed salt, sugar and carbs. I'm almost afraid to ask what they consider unhealthy in their minds.