2023 Prediction Thread - Locks Jan 1st - 2022 was the Year of the Chud, the Lolcow and surprisingly (depending upon who you ask) the Gator. List your predictions for the year 2023 and play long!

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  • Mexico is hot April till November he will return to the states. Also most places won't have central AC so his ass will melt. He will NEVER survive June till August somewhere that is 85 F on average.
  • Some financial info will be made public. (full credit check, LLC tax filings, jilted family leaking his "hidden" assets)
  • Ralph will plan and poorly execute at least two live events
  • In a yearly fashion Ralph will find some way to outdo any prediction of stupidity (2020 having knocked up an 18 year old, 2021 knocking up a horse, 2022 getting knocked out twice in Portugal).
*Dark horse he looses the truck
 
Well...

-Henry Kissinger and/or Dick Cheney will kick the bucket.
-Taiwan will be the place where the shit really hit the fan, not Ukraine nor Russia.
-We'll have an interesting episode regarding Christian. Homeless streamer saga, maybe?
 
There is no Ralphamania but The Ralphamale still reclaims the belt from that no good dirty ayyyyyyylawg thief Harry Morris
 
Will he call off the AC wedding? We'll see!
 
I'm assuming sektor only:

Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. PPP reduced to audio only to keep the cabin warm

2. Milo snakes Fuentes, releases sex tape involving underage groyper(s)

3. Alogs try to beat up Ralph again, but somehow Ralph wins


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. The kino casino ends due to some drama/blow up/retardation purely on Warski's part

2. Ralph shocked and ragepigging after Godwinson goes after him again

3. Asalieri continues partnering with Godwinson, fends off attacks by breadtube and/or the casino

Less-Likely:

1. Yeezy somehow finds his way into a New Zealand fruit orchard

2. At least one more Godwinson + Ralph stream before Godwinson snakes

3. PPP has some major health incident from all the PPPounds

Wtf, lol?

1. Warski caught cheating on Metokur Masochist with Jaden McNeil

2. Lady Rackets releases One Lawyer One Bottle in Jamaica

3. Rackets gets an official sponsorship from Balldo
 
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TV's Adam West said:
Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Aquana/ Adam White troons out
2. Boogie fucking DIES
3. Mister Metokur dies


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Elon Musk somehow manages to piss off everyone again
2. Jonathan Yaniv has another lawsuit
3. Chris Chan is sentenced by june 14th


Less-Likely:

1. Danny Sexbang of Game Grumps fame has a sexual misconduct allegation
2. Another cope, seethe, dilate celebration from fat man in a dress Jim Sterling
3. Something involving Nintendo fans and molestation.
etc.

Wtf, lol?

1. Shmorky comes back
2. Nick Reiketa and Ethan Ralph stream together
3. Adam White gets his life together.
etc.
Click to expand...
Scratch one off for me.
 
Computer Guardian said:
Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Ralph trying to become a part of YE24 like Nick Fuentes
2. Liz Fong-Jones or Keffals attempting to reboot DropKiwiFarms in some way.
3. byuu proven to have faked his suicide again.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Chris-Chan's trial gets extended again.
2. Metokur dies, kickstarting the Battle at Jim's Funeral if the Funeral location is made public.
3. Record number of newfags tracked in the Easy to Track Username Hall of Shame within a year.
4. Boogie2988 pulling an unsucessful scam.
5. Another virus that's declared "Worse than Covid and Niggerpox".
6. Some gay shit involving a Nintendo DMCA or a Smash Tournement.

Less-Likely:

1. Nobody takes up Elon Musk's offer for CEO.
2. Disney pushing out more Box Office flops like Lightyear and Avatar 2
3. Null releases SneedForo 2024

Wtf, lol?

1. Dick Masterson and Vito get jailed for child porn
2. Keffals becomes a True and Honnest Kiwi Farms User
3. nigger/LGBT/retard fatigue finally sets in in America.
etc.
Click to expand...
I get to scratch one out, no thanks to our beloved chink, Liz the Dong Long-Gone.
 
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This is my prediction about Ralph in a short story form:
One day, Ralphamale was livestreaming on xaniberries for le 16728th time. Pantsu walks into the room all horny and says "babe, we need to have more demon babies but we need some assistance from other unworldly entities." Ralphamale then says "Christ izz kang, Pantsu we need more xanax and maker's mark first." Pantsu smiles in a horselike manner and neighs loudly. After Ralph drinks more makers mark and takes even more xanax, he sharts on stream and proclaims "Nick Fuentes, Queen Keffals, and PPP I am summoning you for sex and to help my wife Pantsu have another miracle baby for Christ is kang, christ is kang!" He then passes out and the stream suddenly ends 5 hours later when Pantsu comes in and ends it while neighing with the foal in her arms. Meanwhile, Keffals is proclaiming his undying loyalty and support to America First and Nick Fuentes. He goes on the sussy cast and proclaims that the catboy ranch army is joining the America First army. Nick appears and proclaims a formal alliance. Soon, Keffals is the second-largest streamer on cozy.tv and on request from Nick restarts Queen Clara's Fart fetish Dominatrix twitter and forces Ralph to soon invite him to Merida. PPP says he will accept the invitation to see Ralph in Merida only if he licks PPP's ass and balls. Ralph commits to make this promise and PPP soon arrives in Merida, with Nick Fuentes and Keffals, whom will soon encapsulate Keffals' polycule. Soon, with everyone in the Merida villa, a mostly gay orgy ensues with BDSM and all sorts of anal sex, with Pantsu being railed by PPP and Ralph formulating a new Demon baby to be named after Nick and Lucas. In the end, the whole thing would be recorded and uploaded to Kiwifarms and twitter where Matthew Vickers and various AF and Ralph A-logs would sperg out to an absurd degree which would ultimately implode the entire sektor. Vickers would secretly be sad he was not included in the gay orgy and would proclaim so on twitter for all to see, along with COG, but who cares about what they think.
 
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TV's Adam West said:
Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Aquana/ Adam White troons out
2. Boogie fucking DIES
3. Mister Metokur dies


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Elon Musk somehow manages to piss off everyone again
2. Jonathan Yaniv has another lawsuit
3. Chris Chan is sentenced by june 14th


Less-Likely:

1. Danny Sexbang of Game Grumps fame has a sexual misconduct allegation
2. Another cope, seethe, dilate celebration from fat man in a dress Jim Sterling
3. Something involving Nintendo fans and molestation.
etc.

Wtf, lol?

1. Shmorky comes back
2. Nick Reiketa and Ethan Ralph stream together
3. Adam White gets his life together.
etc.
Click to expand...
Another one for me, fellas. I'm getting close.
 
TV's Adam West said:
Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Aquana/ Adam White troons out
2. Boogie fucking DIES
3. Mister Metokur dies


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Elon Musk somehow manages to piss off everyone again
2. Jonathan Yaniv has another lawsuit
3. Chris Chan is sentenced by june 14th


Less-Likely:

1. Danny Sexbang of Game Grumps fame has a sexual misconduct allegation
2. Another cope, seethe, dilate celebration from fat man in a dress Jim Sterling
3. Something involving Nintendo fans and molestation.
etc.

Wtf, lol?

1. Shmorky comes back l
what the fuck
2. Nick Reiketa and Ethan Ralph stream together
3. Adam White gets his life together.
etc.
Click to expand...
Updated.
 
Black Spruce said:
Up to Three Submissions for Card:

1. Chris's autism deferral works but he is relegated to a group home.
2. Ralph dies.
3. Rekeita becomes a full blown cow and his streams become defined by trolls.


Additional Predictions:

Likely:

1. Barb dies.
2. Russia wins the war and the media and their clapping seal audience forget about it and move on.
3. The Great Chicago Nig-Out of January 2023 begins when the no-cash bail law goes into effect.

Less-Likely:

1. Johnathan Yaniv's rot hole puts him in the hospital for sepsis or gangrene.
2. Keffals gets arrested for child porn.
3. Drachenlord's new place of residence is doxxed and the cycle starts over.

Wtf, lol?

1. Another Brenton Tarrant copycat manifesto nigger.
2. Trudeau is assassinated.
3. Kanye West begins campaigning and preforms the roman salute on stage.
Click to expand...
A few partials.
 
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