Biggest bullshit in a video game

[wtfNeedSignUp]

If there's an unlockable difficulty I better see shit like new attack patterns.

Some games do it right. Others are just "oh well everything does double damage and has 3x its normal health so you have to execute perfectly for longer" and no, fuck you, that's boring.

Speaking of replaying, fuck devs with a pineapple if they don't add a feature of automatic skipping every cutscene, especially slow traversal talk that is popular in modern games.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

especially slow traversal talk that is popular in modern games.

I swear that garbage is my MKULTRA activation code and it's been plaguing western gaming since the late 00s. Not only can the dialogue not be skipped, but I also have to input movement myself and they always, ALWAYS, make it so that the character that you're supposed to follow while they yap is slower than the walk speed of the main character. I swear whenever I encounter this I feel like I'm gonna pass out and come to several hours later 100s of kilometers away with a bloody knife in my hand and a person I don't know with their throat slit in front of me. That's the extent of my seething hatred for that shit.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

I swear that garbage is my MKULTRA activation code and it's been plaguing western gaming since the late 00s. Not only can the dialogue not be skipped, but I also have to input movement myself and they always, ALWAYS, make it so that the character that you're supposed to follow while they yap is slower than the walk speed of the main character. I swear whenever I encounter this I feel like I'm gonna pass out and come to several hours later 100s of kilometers away with a bloody knife in my hand and a person I don't know with their throat slit in front of me. That's the extent of my seething hatred for that shit.

I 100% blame journos like Yahtzee for sucking the cock of Half Life and constantly criticizing any game that has cutscenes for being "unimmersive" and "breaking the flow". Because pressing forward while the main character slowly talk and walk for 10 minutes is better because you can shift the camera.

 

[JumJum]

When games add a mechanic where they can move boxes or dumpsters and decide they need to put it everywhere in the game. The more it slows you down, the more they can't help make you move 5 different fucking boxes to move forward and actually have fun.

 

[Markorian]

"Here's an obscenely OP feature/mechanic/item/weapon/power/party member/etc that we give you near the start of the game that trivializes the entire rest of the game. The entire game is balanced around it though, so if you try choosing not to use it, the game is a miserable slog."

 

[NerdShamer]

When games add a mechanic where they can move boxes or dumpsters and decide they need to put it everywhere in the game. The more it slows you down, the more they can't help make you move 5 different fucking boxes to move forward and actually have fun.

The worst that I've seen it was in an old Harry Potter game. But even then, it was two or three boxes that you had to slide around.

 

[Scarthew]

View attachment 6173242

This fucking game expects you to be well read on your Shakespeare

Everyone knows shakespeare, even the lesser known 2 are obvious, othello which you should get the "black and white" hint from knowing the board game anyway, and king lear which then can be ruled out at that point as the remaining slot.

The real bullshit of this puzzle is there's nothing to indicate you did it right and theres a second puzzle for putting in the code, if they locked into place when ordered correctly it would've solved a lot of the frustration because you'd know to move on.

I've always been a tad confused as to why nerfs and balance patches are needed in single player games. I'm not talking about fixing legit glitches like something fucking up and doing 10,000 damage per hit but rather the "this weapon is slightly better than another weapon better cut its damage in half" shit.

Are the NPCs going to complain or something?

Balance is important even in a singleplayer game, its fundamental to game design to give roles and niches to options. That's not to say everything should be equal but there should be decisions to make.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

Balance is important even in a singleplayer game, its fundamental to game design to give roles and niches to options. That's not to say everything should be equal but there should be decisions to make.

Modern day game balancing is either so specialized you are expected to use someone else's guide how to play the game, or so overbearing it is either meaningless or you are just playing the sequence of moves that the devs decides.

 

[Scarthew]

Modern day game balancing is either so specialized you are expected to use someone else's guide how to play the game

The only games I've ever had to use a guide for were old adventure games which were deliberately designed to force the use of a guide.

or so overbearing it is either meaningless or you are just playing the sequence of moves that the devs decides.

What games are you referring to with either point because I have no clue what you're talking about.

 

[indomitable snowman]

Losing progress in a game because of some physics jank or RNG failure mechanics. I'm looking at you, Viscera Cleanup Detail.

Physics jank, that just unlocked a memory for me. More framerate jank but whatever.
GTA IV there is 1 section where you have to qte to not fall out of the helicopter or something. It is tied to to frame rate. On console not an issue on PC, very big issue as GTA IV has unstable frame rates. It is impossible to progress past that part without having to use an external program to force the framerate to 30.

 

[Friendly Primarina]

It is tied to to frame rate.

Unbelievable that R* North were still doing this in 2008.

 

[XL xQgg?QcQCaTYDMjqoDnYpG]

Unbelievable that R* North were still doing this in 2008.

They are still doing this in GTA5/Online
Speedrunners have toggles for different framerate caps to achieve certain tricks, and racing communities enforce fps limits
Apparently they managed to get around this in E&E, but that's a next gen exclusive so who cares

 

[Varretnon847]

Unbelievable that R* North were still doing this in 2008.

Doesn't Bethesda too still have this issue? I feel like I recall Fallout 4 having some issue with its physics tied to the framerate.

 

[Korpon]

Physics jank, that just unlocked a memory for me. More framerate jank but whatever.
GTA IV there is 1 section where you have to qte to not fall out of the helicopter or something. It is tied to to frame rate. On console not an issue on PC, very big issue as GTA IV has unstable frame rates. It is impossible to progress past that part without having to use an external program to force the framerate to 30.

Oh this was an issue for me on console way back on launch too (maybe they patched it idk), it's literally at the very last mission at the last section where you jump the bike to the helicopter and have to be pulled in and mash some buttons, it never worked for me even after redoing the entire fucking last mission 30 times, so I gave up and ended up replaying the entire game later on and chose the other ending and it finally worked then.

 

[Day of the Cope]

I am so fucking tired that "balancing" in game is always about taking whatever is the best possible option and making it worse. It just results in a constant cycle of players moving down the line to the next best option that gets nerfed until everything sucks. Honestly, I fucking hate the idea of balancing in general because games aren't supposed to be "balance". Games are supposed to be fun. No one in the fucking history of gaming has ever recommended a game to someone else on the idea that it's "balanced" unless they have a brain parasite. You what to know what game is perfectly balanced between players? PONG. Fucking PONG. Both players have access to the exact same paddle, size and all. Imagine playing fucking PONG for entire life.

I can already hear the contrarian bullshit now: "oh, so you want an instant win button?!" Go back to when I said "games are made to be fun". Being able to click a button and reach the end of the game wouldn't be fun since what makes games fun are choices and interactions. When you can skip all the choice making like "how will I move through this level" and "what tools will I use to reach my goal", than the game becomes boring as shit. But a "win button" isn't the only thing that limits choice and interaction. There's also.... nerfing shit to near uselessness! Yes, fuckers! Turns out that the nerfs are just as bad as the "win button" because they both do the same thing of reducing choice and interactions. You know what would happen if every gun in a FPS was buffed to gills? People would bring whatever they want! Maybe, just fucking maybe, the best way to counter metas is to not reduce the options people have but to give them more options!

 

[Scarthew]

Unbelievable that R* North were still doing this in 2008.

While I'm not particularly clued into why this is done there must be an advantage to tying a game's animation to its framerate. If I had to guess it's probably consistency because most fighting games, most of the most thoroughly well designed action games (re4, bayonetta, god hand), fromsoft games, silent hill, and many many more are designed this way. Maybe it helped games run better by having everything render on rythm with the tickrate? That's definitely something worth looking into because I remember total biscuit and his endless crusade aganst framelocked games just always seemed really ignorant to me, the answer can't just be laziness.

 

[Day of the Cope]

While I'm not particularly clued into why this is done there must be an advantage to tying a game's animation to its framerate. If I had to guess it's probably consistency because most fighting games, most of the most thoroughly well designed action games (re4, bayonetta, god hand), fromsoft games, silent hill, and many many more are designed this way. Maybe it helped games run better by having everything render on rythm with the tickrate? That's definitely something worth looking into because I remember total biscuit and his endless crusade aganst framelocked games just always seemed really ignorant to me, the answer can't just be laziness.

The reason they tie physics to frame rate is because gamdevs either a) don't understand deltatime or b) are making the game for console and it's easier. Honestly, just reminds me of how developers used to tie the games framerate to the fucking clock speed of your CPU. The more things change...

 

[Suel Forrester]

the laziness of Zelda tears of the kingdom. it seemed so phoned in compared to the first.

the first had a VIBE to it, the shrines were placed sensibly, the puzzles inside were well designed, the weapons loked cool, the combat was decent, you had incentive to explore...the seond one didnt really try to esablish a vibe and the puzzles fucking sucked

the construction mechanic was burnt ass.

 

[The Last Stand]

GTA IV there is 1 section where you have to qte to not fall out of the helicopter or something. It is tied to to frame rate. On console not an issue on PC, very big issue as GTA IV has unstable frame rates.

Yes, it happens when you play it on Xbox Series S|X because the emulation unlocks the framerate. With that, you'd have to rub your fingers from the A and X buttons I think.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

The only games I've ever had to use a guide for were old adventure games which were deliberately designed to force the use of a guide.

It's mainly autism RPGs. Though even relatively popular games like Elden Ring are infinitely easier by following a guide and the awful DLC is based on that assumption.

What games are you referring to with either point because I have no clue what you're talking about.

Tactics Ogre for the Switch was the biggest time I felt it with how underpowered everything felt. But even in other games you'd have the issue of extremely static and limited growth so the gameplay will be identical to other players.