Cooking with Kat (and DSP) thread

[tzgnilki]

When he talks about his weekly 'Turkey Dogs' meal he always says they eat them with 'beans' what does that mean? Has anyone ever asked what he means by beans? There are about 35 thousand types of beans and possibly more ways to prepare them. My first thought was baked beans from a can but maybe he means frozen green beans? What a weirdo

dave has mentioned having baked beans in the past, and knowing how lazy the both of them are, it's safe to say it came from a can and was probably some premium brand too lol

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

When he talks about his weekly 'Turkey Dogs' meal he always says they eat them with 'beans' what does that mean? Has anyone ever asked what he means by beans? There are about 35 thousand types of beans and possibly more ways to prepare them. My first thought was baked beans from a can but maybe he means frozen green beans? What a weirdo

 

[DiabeticSP]

Hot dogs and baked beans are a midwest/michigan thing.

Baked beans on the side.

 

[Schmeckel]

Hot dogs and baked beans are a midwest/michigan thing.

Baked beans on the side.

Baked beans from a can are...ok if you're at some big backyard grill/BBQ session. Phil probably gets a big can of Busch's and eats that all to himself (poor ahfice chair...).

Making your own baked beans is simple as hell with just a few common ingredients, and come out immeasurably better than the canned crap.

But, this is Phil, afterall. And so the secret recipe in the can makes it custom, gourmet, homemade, and from scratch. Just like the ballpark turkey franks they get in the grocery store.

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

Baked beans from a can are...ok if you're at some big backyard grill/BBQ session. Phil probably gets a big can of Busch's and eats that all to himself (poor ahfice chair...).

Making your own baked beans is simple as hell with just a few common ingredients, and come out immeasurably better than the canned crap.

But, this is Phil, afterall. And so the secret recipe in the can makes it custom, gourmet, homemade, and from scratch. Just like the ballpark turkey franks they get in the grocery store.

What constitutes as "custom" to him is probably not just the fact his horse maid made authentic home made meals, but also if she simply uses new flavours or condiments that he's never even heard of before.

Kat probably just changed one or two ingredients and Phil as usual, over exaggerates it and calls it a new custom dish that she whipped up.

 

[Muppetmode]

Hot dogs and baked beans are a midwest/michigan thing.

Baked beans on the side.

I guess? But they’re also grown adults, one of them makes over 100k a year. U’d think they’d be able to cobble together something better for you. I guess that happens when they order food.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

What constitutes as "custom" to him is probably not just the fact his horse maid made authentic home made meals, but also if she simply uses new flavours or condiments that he's never even heard of before.

That's actually exactly what he said "custom" meant when he talks about food. Taking an existing recipe and adding something to it to make it "your own". I wouldn't be surprised if, let's say, nuking a TV dinner and then putting some hot sauce that you bought from the store on it would constitute as "custom" in Dave's oddly-shaped head.

 

[tzgnilki]

That's actually exactly what he said "custom" meant when he talks about food. Taking an existing recipe and adding something to it to make it "your own". I wouldn't be surprised if, let's say, nuking a TV dinner and then putting some hot sauce that you bought from the store on it would constitute as "custom" in Dave's oddly-shaped head.

his wife tried to cook chicken in an air fryer, it somehow came out raw and burnt at the same time

I would also consider that "custom"

 

[Muppetmode]

his wife tried to cook chicken in an air fryer, it somehow came out raw and burnt at the same time

I would also consider that "custom"

To add to how retarded this is, I don’t think they’ve used the air fryer since. Parent’s should’ve just gave him iTunes gift cards for his jpegs

 

[DiabeticSP]

I guess? But they’re also grown adults, one of them makes over 100k a year. U’d think they’d be able to cobble together something better for you. I guess that happens when they order food.

I mean I eat hot dogs (sometimes with baked beans) like once a week.

Its easy and fast and tastes good. I can't knock Kat for going with the old standby.

Its just retarded when Phil talks about it, but thats how he is with all food.


Edit: does Phil even own a grill? Is this bitch boilimg hot dogs.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

his wife tried to cook chicken in an air fryer, it somehow came out raw and burnt at the same time

I would also consider that "custom"

Is Dark Dave or his horse related to Salmonella Jack Scalfani by any chance? He's all about chicken that's raw in the center.

What constitutes as "custom" to him is probably not just the fact his horse maid made authentic home made meals, but also if she simply uses new flavours or condiments that he's never even heard of before.

That is exactly his definition of "custom". He's always going on about foods his horse cooked being "custom made". And based on what we've seen of her cooking she's literally the kind of person that would gussy something premade up by adding a couple touches of this or that and then calling it her own.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Edit: does Phil even own a grill? Is this bitch boilimg hot dogs.

I hope she starts boiling hamburgers Kengle-style.

 

[Schmeckel]

I hope she starts boiling hamburgers Kengle-style.

Just wait until he starts gushing about the Connecticut delicacy of steamed hams that khet learned how to make.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Just wait until he starts gushing about the Connecticut delicacy of steamed hams that khet learned how to make.

I remember hearing about those and seriously wondering who the hell in their right mind would want to eat a steamed cheeseburger. And then I saw the video where they talked about it and the device they used to make it.

And sure while the device looks kinda spiffy it doesn't take away from the fact that a steamed burger is a crime against burgers. That honestly sounds like something Kay would make.

 

[DiabeticSP]

I hope she starts boiling hamburgers Kengle-style.

I'm not saying I've never boiled hot dogs during winter when I'm not freezing to death to grill but boiled turkey dogs sounds disgusting.

Someone needs to ask Phil how Khet cooks hot dogs and what condiments he uses.

 

[Robotic Richard Simmons]

Got bored and started watching old Tevin streams again, and found this moment, where DSP complains about being ripped off at the airport restaurant. Now he claims that its not his fault he got ripped off by shitty airport food, as the restaurant overly exaggerated on the menu descriptions about how delicious their $15 sandwiches were going to be.

Like all DSP stories about him interacting with IRL people, this sounded retarded so I thought I'd take a look.

He said that they went to some place called the "African Cafe" at the airport, quick google search showed that there’s a place called the "Africa Lounge" so pretty sure this was what he was referring to.

Kat apparently had an "Italian Chicken Sandwich", and on the menu there's a "Grilled Italian Chicken" sandwich, so it was probably this.
Now in the video, DSP describes the menu as …
"a flame grilled delectable, marinated chicken breast, with provolone cheese, and some kind of vegetables, and a delicious aioli sauce on a ciabatta bread with your choice of sides"
But... as you can see the menu reads…
“Marinated chicken breast grilled & topped with provolone & roasted peppers, served on a roll with lettuce & tomato” with sides of “potato chips and a pickle spear”

Ok… so quite a bit of an exaggeration there Dave… Also liked how he glossed over all the vegetables even though that was half of the description, lol.

DSP meanwhile, had a turkey sandwich which he described as…
“slow smoked chicken breast with delicious cheddar cheese and a hand mixed garlic aioli mayo on a delicious hoagie roll, choice of either chips or fries” ‘
But once again, heres what the menu said…
“smoked turkey breast served on a French roll with choice of Swiss or cheddar cheese, mayo, lettuce, onions & tomato” with the same side options as Kat’s chicken sandwich.

So just a couple of things off again. First thing, left out all the veggies again, c’mon Dave…
Second thing is, what’s with him trying to shoehorn in aioli into everything? Was it because he was visiting his parents, so he thought he had to “Italian” the story up?
And finally, this dude complained that the chips he bought from an airport restaurant were not homemade but were instead bagged chips… lol this dude.

This brings me back to what always fasincated me about the pig, which is why he tells these stupid pointless lies. Like it was a stream about your wedding, why make this pointless shit up and waste 5 mins talking about how retarded you were to be ripped off by an airport restaurant?
So the theories I have are as follows:
1. He wanted to prolong the overall story to attract more tips
2. He felt retarded for paying $15 for shitty airport food and wanted to make himself feel better by making up this story about how it wasnt his fault.
3. He had to make the story up to cover up why he was paying $15 for a single meal when he was supposed to be broke
4. There is so little going on in his life that he has to embelish the tiniest things in his life just so he doesn't come off as a loser to his chat
5. His pig brain was actually so famished that he actually replaced the menu with his own deluded universe and was then shocked that reality did not bend to his will

Anyways, thanks for coming to my Autism Talks

You know most people who aren't a fan of mayo to begin with may wonder "How could it get any worse than this?" Well, the answer is Miracle Whip. Let's take mayo and dump sugar and vinegar into it.

 

[Philly May Lyrus]

You know most people who aren't a fan of mayo to begin with may wonder "How could it get any worse than this?" Well, the answer is Miracle Whip. Let's take mayo and dump sugar and vinegar into it.

You can't hang with the tang my guy? I totally agree it is bad.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

You know most people who aren't a fan of mayo to begin with may wonder "How could it get any worse than this?" Well, the answer is Miracle Whip. Let's take mayo and dump sugar and vinegar into it.

Considering that mayo already has either lemon juice or vinegar in it, it's not that bad. But having to add sugar to offset the vinegar? What's the point of adding the vinegar in the first place?

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

I like how optimistic you guys are. Do you think Phil boils his hot dogs? Really?

First you have to find the cookbook with the recipe. Then you have to search through the cupboards to find the exact sized pot. Then get a measuring cup. Then fill the measuring cup with the correct amount of water. Then put the pot of water on the stove. Then you have to calibrate the stove to the correct heat level. Then you have to wait for forever for the water to cook, stirring it occasionally...

Nah, he uses the microwave.

 

[This comment matters]

Knowing Khet's culinary acumen, it would probably look more like cigar butts in gallstone sauce.

Schmeckel with the deep Calvin and Hobbes reference. I like it.