Lovequest FB 9/7 - Sad over not having a sweetheart

[jc17]

"Also praying she would find me."

Sorry Chris, but there are some things even god can't do.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

To summarize, Chris just wants a mommy that he can fuck.

Oh, absolutely. Chris has never been looking for love, affection, etc.

Not only that, but it seems Chris doesn't even care who the Sweetheart is -- being Barb 2.0 is more like a position to be filled by any girl (who's white, non-smoking, 18-[Chris' current age], etc).

without alluding to a fucking video game or kids show at least once

To Chris, referencing kid-friendly pop culture is on par with quoting Shakespeare or alluding to classic mythology. Like how he thinks McDonald's is a classy place for a first date.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Jessica Quinn is about up to the end with his bullshit though hahahaha

I haven't seen Quinn post in a long time, feels like last July, actually. She doesn't still have him on Facebook, does she?

I totally agree. If he'd only get over his hatred of he could a heartsweet among his troon kind. Then they could steal #Jordessica's crown as the top transbian power couple!

Jordman is 1000 times more funny than Phil ever dreamt of being.

 

[AnOminous]

Chris actually thought his spastic activities of harassing every single female remotely related to ponies with increasingly demented tweets was going to get him laid.

My complete summation of this thread.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Chris actually thought his spastic activities of harassing every single female remotely related to ponies with increasingly demented tweets was going to get him laid.

My complete summation of this thread.

Yep. Even pony women won't date men who soil themselves and do nothing about it*.

*For those who may be able to prove me wrong, please don't. I really rather not know.

 

[BadaBadaBoom]

The most interesting part of Chris' lovequest to me has always been how unrelenting he is in changing his habits even when the possibility of an actual sweetheart is on the line. Look over any of his chats or encounters with (at least what he thinks) are real girls interested in him and you'll always see him immediately become standoffish and angered with girls over any suggestion they make he doesn't like. Whereas most desperate guys would just lie at the bare minimum to get into a woman's good graces, Chris will stubbornly argue to the point he is obviously making the girl mad at him. Then when it all falls apart he will go right back to whining and waiting for his next sweetheart to magically show up.

 

[Molo]

It's almost like beautiful women don't want a spoiled, lazy, irresponsible, unemployed, coddled, fat manchild who pretends he's a woman

You forgot the Oedipus complex part

 

[Lipitor]

I wouldn't even describe it as being shallow. Some women out there are outright gold diggers, but being able to show her a good time (and have it go smoothly) is still a fair thing to find attractive. Wanting a partner with the desire and capability to give you a good life is a reasonable thing to ask for.

"I'm going to order another glass of wine" "hmm, yeh, dat might not be OK... *checks bank account* nah, my account is in da negatives!"

I can't imagine that's a big turnon for a girl.

I think most women would prefer a financially stable mate, over one that isn't. Some more sympathetic women can overlook a guy going through a financial rough spot, if they see that the guy has clear goals he's working on to help him get out of it. Chris is just letting his poor money situation fester and get worse.

I also think the biggest non-superficial reason is his codependency issues he has with his mom. Pretty sure girls want you to be nice to your mother, but live independently of her. Even if a girl had a good reason to date Chris, she'd still have to put up with how He's joined at the hip with Barb and so she'd have to deal with all the negative Barb aspects.

Chris seems to have a natural urge to have a relationship that most humans do, but he's got this weird, I also need host I can be a parasite on angle to it too. So that's a huge turn-off for anyone. It''s all manifested itself as this weird Disney princess movie ending fantasy that he's conjured in his head.

He doesn't seem to have the awareness to look at his peers and elders to see the choices/decisions they made and where they led them to. Instead he expects his life to mirror a disney cartoon, where the main character is some downtrodden, misunderstood individual who by a quick twist of fate ends up with all their dreams fulfilled.

 

[Professor Iris]

Straight talk (and I use the term VERY loosely), do you really think somebody who dresses and acts like an outright bullerman would score a woman without paying for it?

I mean, Chris looks so trashy, soap looks like an outright foreign concept to him at this point. I have a hard time telling if it's green hair dye or outright mildew growing out of his follicles at this point.

Chris, dead serious, people like you shouldn't be reproducing. At all.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

It's why Chris is so absolutely indignant about being called creepy for creeping on people on twitter. I think he really is "following the rules", and that's why he's so pissy.

The problem is life is highly contextual, meaning for which game is Chris following the rules? If he's even in the game to begin with, which he's not. Meaning, it doesn't matter how much Chris creeps on women, he was never a viable candidate for a deep meaningful friendship or romantic relationship, to begin with. It hasn't even meen 6 months since Chris was slapped down for constantly creeping on women by using the terms dear and darling. Yes, that was obviously creeping, especially since he didn't do it to males.

I think a big issue is that Chris doesn't believe in boundaries.

Yeah, I think this furthers my feeling that Chris is inherently creepy. It's not a social conditioning or lack of it, he's just creepy. I think the "dear" and "darling" thing are the end of the facade for Chris or at least the beginning of the end.
If Chris had it his way, he would be mingling with normal and highly successful people.

I wouldn't even describe it as being shallow. Some women out there are outright gold diggers, but being able to show her a good time (and have it go smoothly) is still a fair thing to find attractive. Wanting a partner with the desire and capability to give you a good life is a reasonable thing to ask for.

"I'm going to order another glass of wine" "hmm, yeh, dat might not be OK... *checks bank account* nah, my account is in da negatives!"

I can't imagine that's a big turnon for a girl.

To a certain extent, it's rooted in biology. I think Chris' "dating" problems go way beyond what you've described. His ego and taste for relatively normal woman (nonretarded) really seal the coffin that is Chris' dating life. You can claim that he would date a retarded woman, but that would also hamper his mommy fantasy of dating a high functioning woman who took care of Barb and gave him lots of monies. Although Chris hangs out with gay nerds and other undesirables (the autistic, fat, and ugly), it's only because non-pony people would never want him around.

 

[Zarkov]

It's funny because queue means penis in french. Coincidence ? I think not...

 

[ES 148]

It's funny because queue means penis in french. Coincidence ? I think not...

Excuse me, what?

a) what are you referring to, and b) is that actually true

 

[Zarkov]

Excuse me, what?

a) what are you referring to, and b) is that actually true

a) Chris said his sweetheart search is still in his queue
b) yes

 

[Flame the Sunbird]

I'm really not joking when I suggested #Jordessica as a role model. For those that don't follow the Ratking forum, Jordan and Jessica are a couple of poor, unattractive, obese, autistic "lesbian" trans women. Yes, they're a total mess but at least they've recognized they can't do any better and have found some kind of companionship in each other. Chis is still too proud to realize he's the bottom of the barrel when it comes to dating opportunities.

 

[4Macie]

Chris will never have sex again in his life.

Oh he will. He'll just have to pay for it again.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Oh he will. He'll just have to pay for it again.

Then, he'll rage on Facebook at the hooker for being expensive and not letting him buy Leggo and Poneh'.
The real challenge is finding one willing to do such another disgusting act. She would also have to be willing to provide the Sweetheart experience which involves giving back the initial fee so Chris can buy toys.

 

[Tennis-Ball-Tony]

The most interesting part of Chris' lovequest to me has always been how unrelenting he is in changing his habits even when the possibility of an actual sweetheart is on the line. Look over any of his chats or encounters with (at least what he thinks) are real girls interested in him and you'll always see him immediately become standoffish and angered with girls over any suggestion they make he doesn't like. Whereas most desperate guys would just lie at the bare minimum to get into a woman's good graces, Chris will stubbornly argue to the point he is obviously making the girl mad at him. Then when it all falls apart he will go right back to whining and waiting for his next sweetheart to magically show up.

A big problem with Chris and being stubborn is that a characteristic of autism is not to like change. Chris just adds his own entitlement to that, so it's doubly hard to get him to do anything.

He seems to agree, and will make minute changes, or try them, but it's really difficult for him to honestly pull off a change that he sticks with, especially if there's not consequences. Chris generally has learned not chimp out in public, or do crazy stuff like he used to because Johnny Law came in and took him through the court system. It took a few times, but he knows that stuff isn't well received, and he'll get punished for it.

Some "theoretical girlfriend" saying he should eat right, or jog, may get at most one or two small efforts, but that'll be it. Even if they say they're angry with him, well shit, Barb's been angry with him a lot over the years but still comes back around, so that's not really a consequence for him to face.

 

[Rupin]

Except Batwoman wants to be swooped up by Batman, not have to swoop in to take care of and fuck the Penguin.

Chris is still holding out for that fuck-mommy, and he's just not ever going to get it.

Nope, Batwoman is a lesbian. But she still wouldn't be into Chris unless she kicked his after mistaking him for the penguin.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Then, he'll rage on Facebook at the hooker for being expensive and not letting him buy Leggo and Poneh'.
The real challenge is finding one willing to do such another disgusting act.

Any hooker charging prices that Chris is willing to pay will have seen worse. Much worse.

 

[Subconcious Offense]

@Subconcious Offense

You know what to do.