Here's your controller, bro - Post bad controllers, either in design or maintenance

[Raging Capybara]

Rock Band 3 pro controller.

I wanted this at the time but never found for sale.

Also this shit:

Mike's Box of Weird Controllers - Mike Matei Live

Follow Mike Matei on Twitch ✜ https://www.twitch.tv/mikemateilive Discuss this on our official Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheCinemassacre/comments/bydb...

youtu.be

 

[Recoil]

rez vibe was japan only

>you will never get your gf off while playing vidya

 

[Sperglord Dante]

This one is just gloriously dumb.

 

[Jean Lafitte 1812]

View attachment 900153View attachment 900154View attachment 900155


Rock Band 3 pro controller.

I wanted this at the time but never found for sale.

Also this shit:

Mike's Box of Weird Controllers - Mike Matei Live

Follow Mike Matei on Twitch ✜ https://www.twitch.tv/mikemateilive Discuss this on our official Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheCinemassacre/comments/bydb...

youtu.be

View attachment 900156

I actually have the Rock Band controller. It isn't the worst thing I've used, but there's a reason it's been in storage for years. At least it breaks down for storage.

 

[0 0]

It's not a controller per se, but here's the NES Speedboard, a chunk of plastic you insert a NES controller into to supposedly make it easier to button mash in games like Skate or Die:

View attachment 900080

The idea is that it's easier to button mash with a claw grip. But nobody told the designers for the Speedboard that people can just hold the controller in a claw grip without a piece of plastic doing it for them.

 

[Prof. Loco]

Well here's an actual controller

Spoiler: The AlphaGrip

This Also has buttons on the back, it's supposed to have all the inputs of a keyboard and this was released in the late 2000's btw.

 

[couponbug.com]

(Don't) DIY rhythm game controllers.

 

[Remove Goat]

It seems like every pawn shop has like 20 of these damn things.

 

[The Great Citracett]

This piece of shit right here:


Saved up and bought one brand new for my SNES when I was 10. Paid 18 whole dollars for it too.

Worked for roughly 3 days before it just completely stopped functioning. It had a normal/turbo/autofire switch for each button which was cool. The switch at the bottom was "slow-mo" which was advertised as the ultimate innovation making the toughest games beatable.

Fucking thing was literally just autofire for the pause button. You flip that switch, it hits pause like 3 or 4 times per second. Completely and totally worthless. Especially with the way a lot of games paused.

 

[XYZpdq]

I never got one of those dedicated single-hand controllers, but I have mapped stuff in emulators so I can do rpgs one-handed. I do find rpgs more enjoyable if I can loaf there with my arms by my sides like I'm on opium instead of having to put both hands in front of me to hold a controller.

 

[Capsaicin Addict]

EDIT: I can't let this go by without mentioning the best controller peripheral in console gaming. I'm sure everyone knows about it but the Rez Trance Vibrator is exactly what it says on the tin and I'm not waiting another four pages for people to bring it up:

It's a sex toy, and it was never meant to be anything else. It was even as gently nudged at being so in the marketing materials, as if the fact that it was only available in Japan (iirc) was not proof enough. I was so ready to see a new line of this get produced for the HD rerelease and it never happened

I remember reading a fairly explicit review of this thing. By the end of it I was wondering if the damn thing came with cigarettes for afterward.

The original Atari joysticks were fairly simple affairs, and the reason they had so many problems was because the joystick ended in a four or eight legged plastic disc. When you pressed in a specific motion, the appropriate 'leg' pushed down on a spot directly on a circuit board. Of course, when wear and tear started damaging that spot, you started having problems, hence the healthy third-party Atari joystick market.

 

[An Ghost]

I never got one of those dedicated single-hand controllers, but I have mapped stuff in emulators so I can do rpgs one-handed. I do find rpgs more enjoyable if I can loaf there with my arms by my sides like I'm on opium instead of having to put both hands in front of me to hold a controller.

Being able to lay my arms by my sides is the reason Mario odyssey with the joy cons is so comfy.
The switch pro controller is also hella enjoyable because I have enormous hands, and the battery life.

Diy fight stick done better

I had one of these for emulating action games on my phone, but it never made wario land 4 feel like it did on the gba




Nobody posted this classic yet

 

[Based Tom Nook]

>here's your controller, bro

 

[CheezzyMach]

Has anyone mentioned the Atari 5200 controller yet?

Anyway I have 2 controversial nominations:

The original Sega Genesis 3 button pad: Fighting games are virtually unplayable on this thing but TBF to Sega the Genesis came out in the late 80s a couple of years before Fighting games as we know them were created and it works great for SOR and Golden Axe.

The Gamecube controller: Yes the magnum opus of controllers is one I consider the worst because this thing murders my hands with it's hard sharp grips. It's not comfortable to hold for extended gaming sessions and I'm glad the big N started cloning the Xbox controller for it's Pro pads.

 

[Remove Goat]

For all you trainfags out there.

 

[Fwiffo]

Remember when Vox Day creates a terrible, 18-button mouse?

 

[Brain Power]

It doesn't look very comfortable...

How are you supposed to hold this thing?

 

[Remove Goat]

That last one looks painful.

 

[Watcher]

I'm surprised nobody mentioned this piece of shit yet.

TBF, there are some pretty amazing hacks you can do with these things and they do plug right into a serial port.

Fun fact one of the creators of Robot Chicken used a power glove to assist with the stop motion process because he didn't want to keep leaving the set to move a frame forward or backwards

 

[Agent Wet]

How are you supposed to hold this thing?
View attachment 901970

Who thought it is a good idea to make a controller look like a toliet seat ?