I think the primary issue with respecting trans people is that what is being demanded has gone far beyond standards of courtesy, respectful human interaction, and basic human rights. I'm not going to go hate crime some random trans person.
But as an activist movement and political movement, the things they demand range from intrusive (not using preferred pronouns is something that can be punished, and places are moving to make it a legal punishment) to actively destructive (conflating "sex", an objective reality with "gender", an entirely subjective individual experience in law makes many laws meant to benefit or protect women, like Title IX in the US, completely meaningless.)
The trans community also does not believe in any sort of gatekeeping, which makes sense since how does one gatekeep a completely subjective individual experience. However, this makes the trans community vulnerable to predators, general perverts, and bad actors, since there is no real definition of what "trans" even is - look at the huge variety of "non-binary" identities. It's not people with extreme and severe gender dysphoria going through psychological and medical treatment to attempt to live a satisfying life. Literally any one can claim to be trans at any time, and activists have made "self id" the standard they push for, meaning any pervert who wants to look at little girls in a changing room can just say he's trans if questioned, and can flash his semi erect penis at little girls (see the WI Spa incident, and the incidents at Canadian pools).
While you may want to say that's not all trans people, and it's not, the demands the trans community have made have opened that door with no concern for the consequences, and since there is no criteria for being trans, the pedos with hard drives full of child porn, and the violent rapists discovering their new gender identity conveniently in prison are just as valid legally as someone who spent decades in therapy for gender dysphoria and just wants to live a quiet life blending in as their preferred gender.
I can feel compassion for individual people, while still seeing how destructive and dangerous the things their community demands are to others and society in general. The ideology that has fueled the trans movement is far beyond what should be acceptable, and is eroding areas that are established for safety or freedom. Just the levels of censorship they have caused both online and in real life should be worrying, not to mention the long-term consequences that go hand in hand with wide scale medical treatments for an identity.
