Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Trigger Me Timbers]

I’m just here to post before the “pregnancy scare” arc and NAL tries to get Cobes to say he will help look after the baby.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

For you, or anybody who may have missed it; I believe this is the most recent full apartment tour we've gotten. There is another, higher quality version of this I can't find right now; and possibly one other apartment tour from last year some time iirc.

Thanks for posting, I actually missed it and oh boy did I miss this sort of content. So much better than seeing him getting shitfaced and ranting about dumb shit until he passes out. That was a nice little throwback in better times, good times. Same for that Facebook video where he tried to make actual content. A little stupid rant here, a little shitty rap here, mixed with some little boglimnism, so good.

And so much better than speculating about the arrival of a regarded hellspawn or talking about trashhumans having nasty swine sex. I lost it when he showed off his tactial soap and toasted to his Ozzy picture. How focussed he was working on the wand was cute and so good to see him energetic in that short Facebook video. That's the Prince of Regardness that got me hooked so many years ago and I wanna see. Not the sad, drunk, miserable boglim. I wanna laugh and not gag in my mouth bc of all the talk about rotting boglette genitals.

 

[Bixby Snyder]

Oddly enough, a lot of serial killers had super fucked up dicks because they were hypersexual. They just beat off so much they get weird angles, sores from overuse, and scabs as it tries to heal. These guys also have a lot of mental illness, kinda like Cobes does.

I bet if you got a number of jerk-off sessions from Cobes on average, that shit would be astronomical compared to average lonely dude just cleaning out the pipes.

 

[mako]

Oddly enough, a lot of serial killers had super fucked up dicks because they were hypersexual. They just beat off so much they get weird angles, sores from overuse, and scabs as it tries to heal. These guys also have a lot of mental illness, kinda like Cobes does.

Cobes did coin the term "wanker scabs" to describe his own penis, didn't he?

 

[BallBuster II]

Well I guess that confirms she has been taking Folic Acid and Prenatal vitamins since her boyfriend went to jail and she started chasing the sexiest goth in town.

eta: She may have been taking them with the boyfriend as well I guess and may not be related to the Cobra specifically - any sperm may do.
View attachment 5739474

Some doctors say that Prenatal vitamins help your skin and hair. So she could just have them in her daily routine for that reason.

 

[curbside2]

At her age the odds of NaL getting pregnant in such a short amount of time are astronomically low.

 

[Big Dogs Gonna Eat]

At her age the odds of NaL getting pregnant in such a short amount of time are astronomically low.

Retards are super fertile the boglim baby is coming

 

[curbside2]

Retards are super fertile the boglim baby is coming

I would take that bet. If she’s pregnant it’s not his baby. The statistical odds are lottery level. More likely women like her like to use pregnancy scares. As the months get along they fake a miscarriage. Before that they use the fake pregnancy to control someone.

 

[Hennimore]

So BogChron is pushing the pregnancy narrative, we've come full circle and the clip channels really are treating it like a scripted show now. He also shows Josh's lip, I'm assuming that he is saying she gave the boy herpes. I'm not really a herpes expert (lol), what are the chances that is a burn mark on his lip from some kind of pipe and not herpes? Kind of wild that Josh is at a point in his life where a sore could be from a hot meth pipe or just plain old herpes but here we are.

 

[12345]

R8 me L8, buuuuttt in this clip Jessica states that she had just gotten over her period before leaving to see Josh. Women are most fertile a week after their period ends

Late and wrong. While a woman has a chance of getting pregnant any time she has sex she is more fertile when she is ovulating, which is a couple of weeks before her period. Her period is her body making a nest for an egg to be fertilized. No fertilization, no baby and she has a period. So if she just had her period she is less fertile than more.

She could be pregnant, if sex happens there is always a chance, but you also need a specialized and more expensive test to detect the hormones before a missed period.

She may be claiming it, or even pregnant because there is always a chance, but it wouldn't be because she was more fertile.

And since I'm here talking about potentialities of woman's pregnancy, if she says she's on the pill and not to worry, ask her what time of day she takes the pill. Most women don't realize because they don't read the inserts but there is a 3 hour window to take the pill every day, if it's missed by even a hour late that 99% chance goes down the longer the wait.

I'm not disputing she might say or try to baby trap him the only 100% way not to get pregnant is to not have sex, but it's not because she was more fertile after her period. Womens bodies don't work that way. She could always just flat out lie about it and even claim it's why, but it's not.

 

[Rotogravure]

I would take that bet. If she’s pregnant it’s not his baby. The statistical odds are lottery level. More likely women like her like to use pregnancy scares. As the months get along they fake a miscarriage. Before that they use the fake pregnancy to control someone.

It should be noted that although people may call FTW her last "boyfriend" (I'm pretty sure) they never actually met. NAL hasn't actually had any sex for at least a year, maybe more (she's bitched about this). The "recent" porn video of her only showed oral sex (so we don't know if that went any further), and that was not recent either.

 

[TheTourist]

NAL hasn't actually had any sex for at least a year, maybe more ...

supports the 'NAL brings all the horny' theory.

 

[Nāgārjuna]

So BogChron is pushing the pregnancy narrative, we've come full circle and the clip channels really are treating it like a scripted show now. He also shows Josh's lip, I'm assuming that he is saying she gave the boy herpes. I'm not really a herpes expert (lol), what are the chances that is a burn mark on his lip from some kind of pipe and not herpes? Kind of wild that Josh is at a point in his life where a sore could be from a hot meth pipe or just plain old herpes but here we are.

Josh always has similar red marks on his face, it could really be from anything between his grease diet and lack of hygiene, duster freezer burn, burn mark from his pipe, or just him hitting himself because he's retarded.

 

[Ponzo]

People overly report lolcow channels trying to fuck with them.

Found this posted on Jessica Messica's discord. It looks like someone reported NAL to walmart for her toilet stream

Bonus meme

 

[Qu4tttro_Bagina]

So BogChron is pushing the pregnancy narrative, we've come full circle and the clip channels really are treating it like a scripted show now. He also shows Josh's lip, I'm assuming that he is saying she gave the boy herpes. I'm not really a herpes expert (lol), what are the chances that is a burn mark on his lip from some kind of pipe and not herpes? Kind of wild that Josh is at a point in his life where a sore could be from a hot meth pipe or just plain old herpes but here we are.

Could be the bog got his hands on more duster and gave himself some frostbite while huffing. I'm no expert in degen lip sores though

 

[Mister Baranavichy]

Could be the bog got his hands on more duster and gave himself some frostbite while huffing. I'm no expert in degen lip sores though

I'm also not an expert, but considering the picture of his blackened tongue we saw a couple of weeks back I assume duster huffing is a "straight down the middle" kind of practice, so that would still not explain the sores on the side of the mouth - Now, Nal possibly getting a flare up due to her nervous system at being inside a randos house and blowing him, if she even has nerves still, might be the more likely scenario on how she could've passed them to him.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

"there is no such thing as pregnancy vitamins" is really funny to me for some reason. I keep randomly thinking about it and loling. I know it's because he thinks in his bog brain that they're vitamins that make you pregnant, which is even funnier that he now knows they're real. Cobra is extremely gullible, it's why he has a whole kitchen counter filled with boner pills, "male enhancement pills", even the tactical soap. He spent hundreds of dollars on those 4am infomercial pills that "boost your testosterone, grow thick hair, make your dick bigger, etc". It's one of the reasons Cobra is in my top 3 cows.

 

[Doxmatix]

I'm not really a herpes expert (lol), what are the chances that is a burn mark on his lip from some kind of pipe and not herpes?

Herpes or Pipe Burn? Another classic callback to Chantal (thanks to NAL coming on scene) lol.

I'm guessing it's herpes in Josh's' case since it's on the lower lip - time will tell as it will come back again and again.

eta - I forgot, it could also be razor burn and definitely not herpes or crack pipe use
sources
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chantal-sarault-chantal-al-refae-foodie-beauty.36883/post-10179964
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chantal-sarault-chantal-al-refae-foodie-beauty.36883/post-10179680

 

[HiveDull]

I forgot, it could also be razor burn and definitely not herpes or crack pipe use

+1 to the razor burn theory. IIRC he doesn't use shaving cream and the electric razor that he uses is as blunt as it can be. I would also assume that he doesn't apply any sort of aftershave either.

 

[Bogliacci]

+1 to the razor burn theory. IIRC he doesn't use shaving cream and the electric razor that he uses is as blunt as it can be. I would also assume that he doesn't apply any sort of aftershave either.

Doesn't he just use a trimmer too? Not even a proper electric razor.