Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Bixby Snyder]

Man, Josh literally looks like a disgusting homeless person. Even last year he looked less shit

Watched the ‘Best of X’ year vids and he is a fucking slow rolling train wreck. Was fairly coherent in first years but now it’s like another person.

 

[Mister Uno]

After watching that sickening backstreet boys cover it's really highlighted how confusing cobies singing vids are. Does he present these singing videos thinking that it's impressive/entertaining? He's shown that he has self awareness. But with singing, in his mind is he matching every word and pitch? Or is this just another delusion he presents as his cobra persona? It's super baffling to sit through and comprehend.

Big part of it is the ego he has developed over the years, as you mentioned, from his persona. He gets both good and bad attention, and the majority of his actual fans are probably just trying to encourage him to make him feel better. He can be a stubborn to, despite being self aware, that is thrown out the window if someone else comments on his flaws. He will think the opposite is true because they're just haters. Reverse psychology or whatnot.

 

[TurdFondler]

The phone zooming in so hard really doesn’t help lol. Seems like the computer really masked exactly how grotesque he’s become. I would say Josh is using the filters on his phone so he doesn’t have to look at himself and face reality, but I’ve seen too much Josh to not know he thinks he’s gods gift to vagina.

I think we got like 3 years until this is cobra.
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That's goth as fuck though

 

[SP:OP]

Watched the ‘Best of X’ year vids and he is a fucking slow rolling train wreck. Was fairly coherent in first years but now it’s like another person.

That slow moving train is a fucking racecar blasting towards a new species lol. Slow rolling went out the window like 3 years ago. His rapid deterioration is fucking impressive. Dude would fit right in the 1400s dying at 26.

Now someone do us all a favor and when cobes gets his computer and does a react video, get him to react to ethan ralph.

 

[Taint_fairy]

Wtf is it with autistic regards and the backstreet boys song "I want it that way"??
Now both CWC and Cobes has made covers on that song and as a fun fact; over in Sweden there is a internet famous regard - called roughly translated "Pee-pee on belly Mike" - that has also made an cover on that stupid song: link

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

Wtf is it with autistic regards and the backstreet boys song "I want it that way"??
Now both CWC and Cobes has made covers on that song and as a fun fact; over in Sweden there is a internet famous regard - called roughly translated "Pee-pee belly Mike" - that has also made an cover on that stupid song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUg5WKKQzbQ&ab_channel=RYMDVARELSEN

Idk cobra thinks he’s a “90s” baby and worship anything related to ‘99 although he was born in 91 and someone who was 8 years old isn’t really a fuckin “90s” baby. Christ. It’s like someone who was born in 67 and saying “yeah, I remember then summer of love”

 

[Ellesse_warrior]

I want it that way is a banger, you trolls are just jealous you can't get those harmonies

Here's Kobes' videos from yesterday:

Spoiler: ARCHIVE Rant

Spoiler: SUMMARY

Short video. Filter on again. Fuck mass shootings. Talking about a mass shooting that happened in Michigan. Mass shootings are why he’s not bitching about his dry spell. He doesn’t have any alcohol. Bullying in high school can cause mass shootings. Kobes got bullied in high school and he became a famous YouTuber. Fuck mass shootings. Before you go on a mass shooting ask yourself how would you feel if you lost someone you loved in a mass shooting. Fuck mass shootings. #fuckmassshootings #powertothepeople Gun sperging. Metal detectors in our schools is sad. Fuck mass shootings. Moment of silence for the victims. Shows off some different filters. He doesn’t care about the filters he cares about mass shootings. Kobes got bullied in school and dealt with it by becoming a famous youtuber. Talk about it if you’re being bullied or it won’t go away. It’s beyond sad YouTube. If you’re getting stressed out by social media find other hobbies. It’s ridiculous YouTube there’s just no need for it man.

Spoiler: ARCHIVE Vocal cover

Spoiler: SUMMARY

Short video. He got the internet to work on his PS3 so he’s going to do a vocal cover. Trying out a new filter. He doesn’t like the Backstreet Boys but covering one of their songs will get him more views on YouTube. No copyright infringement intended. Sings I want it that way.

 

[Dick Pooman]

I know this is a day old, but there is nothing I enjoy more than watching Cobra fuck up Paranoid and Iron Man for the 1,000th time.

 

[Clint's Burden]

I want it that way is a banger, you trolls are just jealous you can't get those harmonies

They were talented young fellas, no two ways about that.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

View attachment 2766505

I know this is a day old, but there is nothing I enjoy more than watching Cobra fuck up Paranoid and Iron Man for the 1,000th time.

You think with all his free time, he could learn how to play the guitar so that he can play some ozzy (but mostly Black Sabbath) songs…but nah…

 

[Trappin in the Trap]

View attachment 2766505

I know this is a day old, but there is nothing I enjoy more than watching Cobra fuck up Paranoid and Iron Man for the 1,000th time.

They say some rockstars can make the guitar sing like an angel or scream like a demon. A goth king like Cobes can torture a guitar like the devil tortures the denizens of Hell.

 

[TurdFondler]

We're gonna need to change the thread description to read "professional musician" pretty soon with how those sweet those riffs are

 

[Lesbian Sleepover]

It would be nice to come here and not read 4 pages of Reddit Faggotry. You're here, Reddit is queer, it can't hurt you anymore.

Back on topic;

That'd be his second lost album, I think. His first one was "The Darkness." Most of that album is just lost to time. I'll post the track listing and what songs remain from it below, maybe one of you might be able to fill in some gaps.

Spoiler: The Darkness

View attachment 2747944

1. The Darkness

2. Love Itch

3. Reality

4. Nymphetamine Addiction

5. My Sunshine

6. Can't Trust Love

7. Black Rose

8. Emotion

9. Going Insane

10. Pain Guilt

11. The End of the Road

12. Vampire Love

13. Blue Diamonds in the Mist

14. Dark Side of Love

15. Magical Women

16. Smoking That Sweet Grass

17. Can't Trust Love

18. Rain Storms in My Head

19. Summer Rain

20. Clash

21. Descending

22. Toxic

23. Crazy

24. Daddy Dearest

25. Cold

22. Ring Your Bells All Night Long

23. Razor

24. Shadows

25. Black

I purchased a copy of this album on iTunes when it was available years ago.. let me go through all my stuff I might have a copy of this in its entirety somewhere.

 

[SnusBurns]

We're gonna need to change the thread description to read "professional musician" pretty soon with how those sweet those riffs are

Josh has released more studio albums than Ozzy Osbourne. Ozzy needs to work on his work ethic.

 

[Ellesse_warrior]

Here's more archives and BCV summaries from 2013

Spoiler: ARCHIVES & BCV SUMMARIES FEBRUARY 11th-20th 2013

Morning Video 2013-02-11 Josh just woke up at 11:30am | 0:30 Josh has work at Wendy's from 6pm until 12:30 | 00:50 Josh got drunk on Guinness last night | 1:35 planning on going to the mall and get some black lipstick | 2:14 Josh says he can finish his story and print it off at the library | 4:55 Josh goes for a piss | Working on a new song Song Work in Garage Band 2013-02-11 Josh messes up his audio at the beginning of the video | 0:44 Josh is working on a new video he wants to add to Soundcloud to kick off his music career | 1:03 the song is called 'I'm gone' and it's about if he broke up with Stephanie and he doesn't know what to do with his life | 2:30 song starts playing | 9:00 still needs more work Garage Band work done 2013-02-11 Josh is working on a new song using his keyboard and plays it for the entire duration of the video Bad ass guitar video 2013-02-12 Josh smokes a cigarette shirtless with a bandana wrapped around his head | 0:55 BC Richs are awesome! followed by guitar playing | 6:06 Josh stands up and starts playing like he's at a concert | 12:11 ROCK ON YEAH! | 12:30 chugs a Monster energy drink and smokes a cigarette and ends the video with a funny voice Asome Barreto 2013-02-13 Josh is at Wendy's and has made a burrito filled with bacon, chicken, nacho cheese, lettuce and fried it | :25 a co-worker talks to him | 3:58 doesn't wear his spikes when he works | 5:40 can only eat these burritos when he works in the day but today was special | Last night at the bar 2013-02-13 Josh films a bottle of Bacardi at the bar (either Frosty's or The Sandbar) Life in a nut Shell 2013-02-13 Josh talks about making the burrito in work and filming that big bottle of Bacardi yesterday | 0:50 Josh says people pick on him because he's an easy target and it's not a challenge to bully him | 1:40 Josh posted some black and white photos of him made by the fan Jesus Morris | 3:00 Josh talks about someone on FB trying to talk to him about god/religion and says religious people shove it in your face | 4:00 Josh reads a post about someone face fucking bikers or something | 5:00 Josh has tried to stay calm but trolls make you more famous. It's a love hate relationship | 6:16 Josh talks about Special Blonde, his novel | 7:00 talks about school, not fitting in and teachers didn't like him | 7:35 in his senior year at NC working with a lathe at wood shop but kids told him he wasn't being safe when he wasn't because they were jealous of his skills. This happened several times and Josh got labelled a safety hazard. Josh talks about another incident about some pliers | 10:35 to graduate high school he had to take apart a lawnmower engine and put it back together. It didn't work and he wanted to cry | 11:30 his dad Clint can be arrogant but optimistic | 12:00 Josh got a C- and barely passed and his dad was really happy | 12:30 the drama still followed him after school, fuck the mainstream | 13:00 Josh rants about people reaching out to him saying his videos helped him get his life back in order | 15:00 people called him gay and he would hate gay people but then looks back about being homophobic and regrets it | 16:20 doesn't trust drug companies | 17:00 saw an ad on Hulu and says that their is probably a cure to cancer and the government is hiding it away so they can make money | 20:20 Josh rants about working on garage band and having feedback on his videos | 21:39 people on YouTube make up lies about his religion and his tattoo | 22:22 Josh wrote a new song, got to Wendy's an hour early and drank two monsters while he waited to go to work | 24:00 King cobra isn't psychotic, he was right all along | 25:11 alone for valentines day, may go to the store and get more Guinness | 5:52 life can be hard but deal with it | 7:55 Josh will one day wake up as a Rockstar in a mansion and play gigs | 28:30 Josh makes crazy videos so people are curious, look into him and listen to his music. Josh mentions drinking his own sperm for the shock factor | 29:22 Josh goes to his channel and has 562 subscribers. He has a small fan base and one day he will be on MTV. The trolls will still be here | 32:20 makes some coffee | 36:25 bends over and farts at the camera Happy Valentines Day 2013-02-14 Chris is back and he's asleep face first in Josh's futon. It's Valentines Day and he hates it. True love comes from the heart and not the wallet | 00:42 nice guys finish last but fuck 'em | 00:40 Josh gets a phone call from Chris' aunt or someone called Shelly and says he's in work later | 1:50 Josh gets up, pulls his pants down and farts on Chris and kicks him to wake him up | 2:40 cheers to single awareness day | 3:32 Josh sprays himself with chocolate Axe body spray and says he's single and ready to mingle and rants about the pressure of getting laid | 4:50 fuck this holiday and rants about nice guys finishing last | 6:48 Josh isn't in denial with his shallow existence but you are. Trolls are pussies | 7:00 Josh is comfortable with who he is | 7:55 wake up sheeple, you are being brainwashed | 8:00 sex is like a cigarette and rants about women finding him weird but he's confident and a rock and roll rebel | 9:48 married couples are depressed | 10:10 Josh talks about Stephanie and told her about cheating on her and broke up with her | 2:05 shitty guitar playing from a shitty musician | 16:39 Josh jokingly says he's so shitty and he should just smash his guitar | 20:00 Josh says he's drunk and says women are vain and the world doesn't revolve around them | 21:22 dick size doesn't matter News on the Documentary 2013-02-15 Josh says that Trappped is working on the documentary and it should be out soon | 00:28 Josh says it was fun to make and that they couldn't film everything like guitar playing etc because one of the people with trappped got sick | Youtube war 2013-02-16 1:20 Josh has a graveyard shift last night and is taking his job seriously and working hard | 1:50 Josh is getting sick of people calling him a hypocrite | 2:22 Josh talks about trolls | 3:39 Josh is a dick to his trolls and they are dick to him | 6:40 Josh doesn't let the trolling affect his work day. YouTube is just a hobby | 8:50 Josh is a down to earth guy | 9:40 people arguing about music taste | 12:20 working fast food prepares you for something going wrong and thinking on your feet | 14:28 we are all hypocrites and scumbags | 20:13 maturity isn't about what you wear | Random video 2013-02-18 Josh dramatically smokes a cigarette at the beginning of the video and says he's doing alright in life. Circle! | 2:30 sexy and he knows it and people would watch the Jersey Shore if Josh was on it. Circle | 4:40 Josh is being condescending to his trolls | 6:26 boom circle and repeats circle | 12:30 random thought pattern because of his autism. He's depressed and he's drinking more | 13:50 out trolling the trolls | 16:20 accept Jesus Christ in your life - just kidding. Stop shoving your religion in peoples faces | 17:39 Josh loves drinking caffeine in the morning because it gets him ready for work | 18:20 Josh dances with Monsters | 18:59 Beeves and Butthead reference | 20:20 people keep telling him to shut up about circles | 21:20 drink Monster for your King Cobra party | 21:45 YouTube poops | 23:55 josh explains his tattoo. Five circles of life - power, belief, energy, stamina and existence - five core points of his religion and he lives it every day | 25:36 Josh comes up with his own circle gesture | 28:54 Josh stands up and is wearing his work clothes and messes with his vice clamp | 23:54 can falls out his vice clamp | 42:20 Josh crushes empty cans into a circle | 44:17 Josh shows off his circle of cans and puts it on his head | Skype interview 2013-02-18 Josh has his bandana wrapped around his forehead and is talking with SeizureRobot5000 on Skype | 0:20 they talk about Garage Band | 00:50 Seizure asks Josh if he torrents, Josh doesn't understand and says arrrg! like a pirate | 1:44 Josh wants to release his new CD for free | 2:37 been working on a novel (Special Blonde) | 4:30 the problems in society like homophobia and life and makes a story out of it | 5:40 they talk about energy drinks | 6:37 Venom mango | 7:14 Sprite Remix | 8:00 Josh says that Seizure has a radio voice | 8:40 Josh watches a 90s video about a drink | 9:50 Josh says he has a Mac | 10:19 Josh bought a mac one day and everyone in his family have Macs | 10:41 Josh has had his Mac since 2010 and says he only uses Garage Band on Mac | 11:17 talks about Steve Jobs having Asperger's | 13:00 Josh growing up loving cobras | 14:00 the gothic subculture | 14:20 Juggalos | 15:00 a person called AlexPlaysGames - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQyT0EW_bZM calls in to talk to Josh | 17:14 what made Josh get into YouTube was just a place to vent his frustration and people can relate. Explains the origin of his YouTube username | 18:20 Josh makes long YouTube videos because he gets drunk and says fuck it | 18:49 Josh says he could edit his videos but it would slow down the release of his videos | 19:30 when Josh first started doing YouTube, he could only upload 15 minute videos but then started uploading longer ones | 20:20 Josh talks about him being hard to distinguish between people that try to help him and ones that troll him | 21:00 Josh gets called a faggot by his fans but it's an ongoing war, people troll him and then he gets more subscribers | 21:48 blocking trolls and deleting comments grinds their gears. He fucks with them to get more viewers | 22:40 some people call him angry and arrogant - he jumps to conclusions and says things he doesn't mean | 23:30 picking up on social ques and says he was struggling at work at Wendy's and they were getting annoyed with him but now he has a pattern and is good | 24:00 Wendy's is a good career starter and will work there until his music career kicks off | 24:24 Josh explains what Job Corp is and says you get $50 every two weeks to go to town every two weeks. Josh mentions the groups in job corps are colour coded and often you may not get called to go into town | 25:30 Josh says he's a bad influence and says Stephanie is a goodie two shoes and nerdy. Has the same sense of humour, music taste and views in like inside | 26:00 got kicked out of job corps, didn't speak much and came to terms with it and they split up and wishes her the best in life | 27:00 Josh says he's single and says dating isn't that big of a deal. If he wants sex he will just jack off | 27:50 Josh tried the trombone and the violin in school, asked his parents if he can get a BC Rich Warlock. Josh's parents gave in and says if he bought it, they would pay for lessons | 28:30 Josh worked on a paper route in North Dakota in the snow. 46+ | 28:50 the guitar was $177.77 + shipping | 29:28 Josh's parents know about his YouTube channel and his dad Clint questioned his sanity level and asked if he needed help | 30:17 Josh talks about his music | 30:40 Josh would do it solo and blare it out his iPod and play and sing along | 31:15 Josh talks about his music | 32:15 Josh wouldn't sell out and do pop music | 33:13 Josh's channel message is he's living life, if you can make it then you can. He's not afraid to be himself | 33:38 some people like him and some don't | 34:30 Josh has said people in the past have they wanted wands and they ended up just trolling him | 35:09 the hair dye video on a shirt | 36:00 Josh does an intro for Alex | 37:10 people in the UK watch his videos | 37:20 they talk about the Trappped documentary and he said they will release it with an independent film company to make money | 38:20 Josh talks about it being 2 weeks worth of footage | 39:50 concealed handgun and guns | 40:20 Josh would get a gun license and talks about shooting | 42:50 rules in our society | 43:20 new album cover has an illuminati symbol | 44:40 chemtrails | 45:28 legalising weed | 46:50 Operation Northwoods | 48:00 9/11 conspiracies | 49:20 Obama | 41:20 Josh plays his PS2 and names his favourite games | 53:20 Alex Plays Games re-joins the chat | 55:00 talks about his games | 56:20 UK calling cigs fags | 1:03:02 people from the UK have a problem with Americans | 1:05:14 Josh talks about a video of Chris covered in paint and him making out with Stephanie | Work on my 5th Album has Started to progress 2013-02-18 Josh is working on his new album | 0:38 Josh announces he will be giving away his new album for free on Soundcloud | 00:57 Josh wanted to get money then get famous but now wants to get famous then get money by offering his album for free | 2:20 hopefully giving his new album for free will make him blow up | 3:00 Josh has his music backed up on his iPod | 3:35 hasn't got much money so he uses Garage Band to make music | 4:12 Josh itches his back on his chair | 4:28 first got his Mac in 2012 | 5:13 the trolls call his Mac shitty | 5:45 his trolls call him a faggot because he wears makeup | 6:10 he doesn't see you vlogging for hours and hours each day | 6:30 Josh is good at what he's doing because his subscriptions are growing | 7:32 Josh has 574 subscribers as of this day | 8:39 Josh thinks his YouTube poops are funny because it makes him more famous | 9:10 Josh thinks he's got his trolls hooked on his channel because he's interesting | 10:00 circle of trolling | 10:50 Josh says he's philosophical | 12:50 things could be worse, he's seen people with a worse life than him | 13:45 focus on the positives and says you don't need Jesus | 14:56 deleting YouTube comments that call him a fag | 15:45 Josh plays Sam Morrison Band - Whiskey | 20:30 drops his cigarette on his carpet | 21:00 sometimes you have to be condescending to get your point across | 21:20 life isn't about clichés and talks about karma | 22:41 Strawberry cigarillos | 25:50 Josh plays a sample from his new album of his first song | Explaining my symbol some more 2013-02-18 Josh explains his penis/symbol tattoo on his arm | 00:37 Josh says the lines are a connection of energy from within the binds that hold imbalance to complete perfect balance of power and energy like Alchemy | 0:50 completing a perfect circle making the sixth circle of the cobra angel and cobra demon | 1:10 Josh explains the circles powering up with energy | 2:14 Josh talks about some fan art his fans make about him | 2:55 taking a break from Garage Band | A Video about nothing 2013-02-19 Josh is wearing black lipstick, black eyeliner and painted his nails green | 0:30 usually he doesn't wearing nail polish because Wendy's doesn't allow it but it's worth doing | 0:55 got more work done on Garage Band | 1:20 Josh got lip-gloss thinking it was lipstick | 2:20 Josh wipes off the lip-gloss to prove it comes off too easily | 2:40 circles again | 3:38 ice keeps your drink cold but makes your drinks watery. Circle | 4:33 writers block and creativity is a circle | 5:10 people trolling him in the comments just gives him more fame | 6:13 Josh has 573 subscribers | 7:00 Josh needs to shave soon, he's getting scraggly | 7:50 the secrets of growing a moustache | 9:10 Josh talks about his black and green nails | 10:20 people call him ugly and weird for wearing his goth stuff | 12:55 if you don't like his YouTube, go away | 13:10 Josh takes off his shirt and flexes | 14:00 Josh isn't a people person and likes animals more because he's accepted by them more | 15:10 three cigarettes left but he gets paid tomorrow | 16:19 Josh still has a PS2 and it's his third PS2 and he appreciates what he has | 20:00 cleaning his apartment and getting his life together. You'll never know what he will do next Sneak peek at my 5th album 2013-02-19 Josh is shirtless wearing cammo pants and smoking a cigarette at 9:18am and has work at 11:00am and will get the bus at 10:30am | 1:44 Josh smokes another cigarette | 2:00 Josh has four songs finished for his new album and starts playing one | 6:15 song stops and says it's not done yet and the whole album will be free | Josh ends the video without saying anything The Real King Cobra 2013-02-19 Josh got out the shower, has a bandana on his forehead and has his black shirt he wears for work | 0:55 Josh has microwaved his socks to dry them but it made his tea taste like sweaty socks | 1:45 Josh turns his sound down because he left it on recording songs for Garage Band | 2:25 Josh talks about being in a dark place and once tried to kill himself | 2:50 has attempted suicide many times and failed every time. Life has something in store for him | 3:39 everything is a circle | 5:30 expresses himself with his music | 6:12 people critique him for his Skype interviews | 7:10 quirky weird self for YouTube and embrace your oddness | 7:50 do good things for karma | Bad ass video 2013-02-20 Josh is going to try and do something different and record a new song for his album while making a video as a behind the scenes | 1:49 starts playing songs without distortion | 22:06 shredding on guitar | 27:00 Josh puts away his guitar because it's getting late and doesn't want to piss off his neighbours | 27:39 Josh flings his zippo lighter behind him by accident | 29:10 drops his zippo again and calls it slippery and does zippo tricks | 36:38 Josh refills his zippo and says don't try at home | 39:00 making his music interesting and different |

The stream where @SeizureRobot5000 interviews Kobes on Skype is in these ones. Asome Barreto has got to be one of his top spelling mistakes and if I was going to change my UN that's what I'd pick.

 

[SP:OP]

We need that video of Chris covered in paint making out with Stephanie. Does this exist somewhere?

I didn’t know seizure ever interviewed Josh, let alone so long ago. Seems fitting they do another one soon since it’s almost been 10 years. Gotta get Josh in the exact same outfit though so we can put the two videos next to each other and really appreciate what the last ten years has done to him.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

he’s talking shit about boglin backup. Saying that the computer he got from him could have cp and will not be using it

 

[eaglesfan665]

He cleaned up his scruff and put on a fresh hat to cover up the bald, TWU!

I do have to say it's a shame he shaved the corners of his mustache, the tip waxing/curling/whatever really made him look like a man stuck in the wrong timeline

 

[Clint's Burden]

Saying that the computer he got from him could have cp

The person who did the fundraiser's identity is very public, so it would make sense that he'd send a laptop filled with incriminating material to Josh's house with his return address on it.

You know, sometimes I don't know who's more thoughtless; That Discord he's in or Josh himself.

 

[Robert w'E'd Leef]

He cleaned up his scruff and put on a fresh hat to cover up the bald, TWU!

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I do have to say it's a shame he shaved the corners of his mustache, the tip waxing/curling/whatever really made him look like a man stuck in the wrong timeline
View attachment 2768739

Million bucks, Cobes. Million bucks.