Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Goatchoker]

DUDE, she's flying into DENVER. That's a solid 3-4 hour drive from Casper. WITH SCHIZOPHRENIA. GOD! The logistics on this ordeal are fucking insane, can't wait.

It’s more like +4hrs. If she knows where to go and takes 470.
She’d be better off flying to Casper airport and getting an Uber.
@TheTourist NOT wrong.

 

[Hennimore]

NAL was saying on her stream that the first thing she wants to do is cuddle because she will be tired from her flight when she arrives. If she thinks Josh, a sexually repressed man that hasn't banged in 6 years, is going to cuddle and take a nap with her she is crazy. Jord might be retarded but he is still a man, zero percent chance Josh isn't trying to fuck her the minute she climbs in his disgusting bed.

It's funny watching them both try to grift each other. Jessica is just looking for someone else to mooch off so she can get away from her parents and Josh is just looking for someone he can use to both boost his ego and, in his mind, get one over on the trolls.

I don't think Josh realizes though that once he lets her into his apartment she isn't leaving without police intervention. That's definitely how this will end. After a couple days Josh will get upset that someone is in his space and fucking with his routine. Once that happens he is going to ask her to leave, she will explain that she doesn't have money for a hotel and can't afford a plane ticket and then it's all going down hill from there. Jessica isn't like the other women Josh has interacted with, he isn't going to intimidate her and the minute he raises his voice at her she is gonna lose her shit and promptly beat the shit out of Josh lol

This domestic dispute saga is gonna be insane. I look forward to the eventual stream where both of them are looping over all the Door Dash deliveries. Wait till she gets a in person view of Josh sitting on his ass all day responding to troll texts and screaming into the void that is his phone.

 

[Catboy Ranch Dressing]

New DoorDash order mukbang

~$30 sandwich, not including delivery fee or sides

 

['Ole Dente]

Calling it. First fight is gonna be cuz he can't get a boner.
His limp dick is the obstacle between him and ending his dry spell.
Even if he isn't drunk, it's used to that vice cobra grip and secksy goth cam whores.
Can't wait tbh

Our boy is going to get laid for sure and the moment he does he’s going to announce it to the world on Facebook, followed by a stream entitled:

“Jessicka ended my dry spel”

She’ll be sitting there on his lap and he’ll have that devious shit eating grin. Smugness will never be higher until she says the wrong thing and we get a stream entitled

“sick of entitled womin”

 

[8mm Cunningham]

This boy is going to take his gender relayshons knowledge and fuck this up so hard and I am here for it.

 

[中华人民共和国的政治]

New DoorDash order mukbang

~$30 sandwich, not including delivery fee or sides

poop encrusted fingernails

 

[Orkeosaurus]

Clint better be aware of what's going on because Cobes is in for a rude awakening when he finds out his dad doesn't want to drive 10 hours total to pick up a literal crackwhore.

At least with Stephanie they were basically on the same level intelligence wise, Jessica is clearly more just retarded because of drugs and alcohol. I don't think daddy will approve.

 

[fukkit]

Well toobz she threw my mead in the trash. I HAVE HAD IT!

 

[Garth]

Cobes is in for some horrific post-nut clarity.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

So does NAL have an actual plan to get from Denver to Casper? Did she or Cobes discuss that at all?

If all else fails I'd say she could meet up with Daniel Larson instead, but he's in jail now.

 

[The Blue Morpho]

NAL was saying on her stream that the first thing she wants to do is cuddle because she will be tired from her flight when she arrives. If she thinks Josh, a sexually repressed man that hasn't banged in 6 years, is going to cuddle and take a nap with her she is crazy. Jord might be retarded but he is still a man, zero percent chance Josh isn't trying to fuck her the minute she climbs in his disgusting bed.

It's funny watching them both try to grift each other. Jessica is just looking for someone else to mooch off so she can get away from her parents and Josh is just looking for someone he can use to both boost his ego and, in his mind, get one over on the trolls.

I don't think Josh realizes though that once he lets her into his apartment she isn't leaving without police intervention. That's definitely how this will end. After a couple days Josh will get upset that someone is in his space and fucking with his routine. Once that happens he is going to ask her to leave, she will explain that she doesn't have money for a hotel and can't afford a plane ticket and then it's all going down hill from there. Jessica isn't like the other women Josh has interacted with, he isn't going to intimidate her and the minute he raises his voice at her she is gonna lose her shit and promptly beat the shit out of Josh lol

This domestic dispute saga is gonna be insane. I look forward to the eventual stream where both of them are looping over all the Door Dash deliveries. Wait till she gets a in person view of Josh sitting on his ass all day responding to troll texts and screaming into the void that is his phone.

I think this is an extremely likely outcome.

As soon as that post-nut clarity sets in he's gonna try to get Clint to make her leave, and the police will probably need to become involved.

Cobra will still be on cloud-9 for a long time though. Resetting the dry-spell to year zero is going to get us some of the cockiest, most self-satisfied Cobra content anyone has seen in a long while. It will be the most validation he's had since kicking Warlord's faggot ass.

Cobra bros about to be eating REAL good soon.

 

[snort beg snort]

A lot of counting chickens before they hatch going on in here lately. Some of you think this is guaranteed to go down but it's really not. I wouldn't get too excited if I were you, these are two literal retards we are talking about here.

I hope I'm wrong but I don't even think she's going to make it there. If she does it still probably won't play out like some of you seem to think it will. Either way it's going to be interesting to see what happens.

 

[UncommonParlence]

If Cobers was smurt he'd just spend a few days in Denver with her and not let her anywhere near the lair.

Imagine, if you will... legal weed, cheap roach motel, bucket'o discount condoms, flesh man's vodka handles, livestream donos flooding in, and then putting her ass back on the city bus to the airport.

This being the player move, and Boglim's razor, it will never occur to him even though it's the absolute best outcome.

He'd basically get a slime hooker for the price of an airline ticket and he can pay her to leave at any time. It even sounds like fun. Expensive, but fun.

Hell, he could maybe even get paid too. If he got down on some dtts or fire sales he could turn a profit.

New cobra format? Fly in a different sweat hog every week and flog them with little cobra till he's bored then sojourn on back to Casper. "Cobra couch casting"? "Satanic slut bang city bus"? Ugggghhhh. But I digress.

Take her to the roach motel and stream yourself shit birding, champ.

I might even dono to keep the liquor and weed flowing to fuel the eventual blow out and cope.

I've also been really digging the juxtaposition of their simultaneous streams bogchron has been doing. Like two retarded drunken retarded ships passing in the night.

In conclusion, if he keeps it in Denver... big dub(W). In Casper... Darf couldn't donate enough girl scout cookies to save little man.

God I hope he keeps her in Denver and leaves her in Denver.

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

A lot of counting chickens before they hatch going on in here lately. Some of you think this is guaranteed to go down but it's really not. I wouldn't get too excited if I were you, these are two literal retards we are talking about here.

I hope I'm wrong but I don't even think she's going to make it there. If she does it still probably won't play out like some of you seem to think it will. Either way it's going to be interesting to see what happens.

Odds are definitely that they never meet. Josh has ample opportunities to correctly bail out of this disaster, and he's fully cognizant that Jessica is pure trouble not worth any risk. It's just fun to speculate because I find everything else about Josh horribly depressing.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Odds are definitely that they never meet. Josh has ample opportunities to correctly bail out of this disaster, and he's fully cognizant that Jessica is pure trouble not worth any risk. It's just fun to speculate because I find everything else about Josh horribly depressing.

He must have gotten a lot more desperate since the Gothie saga. The troles finally got to him about the dry spell. Buuuuuuut that plane ticket means the chance of them actually meeting is nonzero now.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

It's fun to imagine and think about them hooking up but realistically there is a 90% chance they never meetup. She's too unstable and will just blow the money on booze and drugs.

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

He must have gotten a lot more desperate since the Gothie saga. The troles finally got to him about the dry spell. Buuuuuuut that plane ticket means the chance of them actually meeting is nonzero now.

Gothie was different than NAL. Adrienne is over the top mean to everyone, including him. There was no chance Josh would go through with that. At least Jessica tries talking nice to him, has proven she's completely obsessed with him, is a proven whore that's made her own disgusting porno, and is guaranteeing they'll fuck.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

Gothie was different than NAL. Adrienne is over the top mean to everyone, including him. There was no chance Josh would go through with that. At least Jessica tries talking nice to him, has proven she's completely obsessed with him, is a proven whore that's made her own disgusting porno, and is guaranteeing they'll fuck.

Eh you're kinda right there. Gothie introduced herself to Josh with a trauma dump and it was offputting even to the boglim. NAL does seem slightly more subtle about the crazy. Slightly.

The cam stuff is interesting because I legit have no idea how Josh actually feels about it. Does he think "haha yesssssth it's like fucking an actual Chaturbate girl" or do the trolls calling him a cuck actually get to him?

 

[Slim Boglim]

You guys are dumb cock tweezers here’s what’s really going to happen:

Jessica will arrive at the airport and be chaperoned to the lair via Clint. when she arrives she will kiss, she will cuddle, and she will make sweet boglim love to Josh. In their moments after holding one another in their arms, surrounded by the aura of love, they’ll speak. They’ll speak of life and its meaning, of dreams, of wishes of the future and hurts of the past. They’ll come to a deeper understanding of one another and she will ask: “did I make you happy? Is this what you needed to be happy, an end to the dry spell?” Josh will stare into her eyes thoughtfully and say “I think so”. She’ll stare back and ask him in a soft voice “Don’t lie to me. What makes you happy, Josh?”

He’ll take a drag from a burned out coil vape pen and exhale as he answers “I dunno. But if it wasn’t this… maybe nothing.” The slug woman will caress his cheek. “If this didn’t make you happy, and you weren’t happy before, you need to change and start in a new path even. Are you ready for a change, josh? Even if it’s painful? The pursuit of happiness isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.” Thoughtfully, he’ll nod “I’m ready.”

The trolls will wake up to find the next day cobra has disappeared from the internet. His YouTube channel and Facebook deleted. His phone number changed, their texts and calls sent out to the void, unread and unheard. After some years one troll would discover old documents showing a man named Jord Sandeu had checked himself into rehab, gone through with counseling. They’d post about it online but nothing would come of it, only speculation.

Miles away a man in Alberta, Canada is just wrapping up his shift in Wendy’s. He hangs up his uniform and steps out into the parking lot, giving a bright dentured smile to a woman holding a toddler bouncing in her arms with excitement “Look Jason, it’s daddy! Say ‘hi daddy!’”
“Hi dada!!”

 

[._.]

The cam stuff is interesting because I legit have no idea how Josh actually feels about it. Does he think "haha yesssssth it's like fucking an actual Chaturbate girl" or do the trolls calling him a cuck actually get to him?

I only follow him through this thread, but when I started reading about this camgirl I feel like, I dont think he would care on his own about her being a slut and/or trashy, hed be down to party with her and fuck and have drunk chemsex or whatever, but when people start digging in with the cuck thing, it would really rile him up.