Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Aristophanes]

He lives at Phoenix House.
He can be found at The Wave Island Sports Grill, Fire Artisan Pizza, Red Robin, the downtown library, under the Monroe Street Bridge, and he apparently shops at Safeway a lot.


Edit: Wanted to add his latest culinary exploit. Ladies?

Fucking hell, boiling Sprite on a stove!? All that it would do is dissolve all of the liquid into pure sugar, taking out the Sprite flavour with it. If he wanted to thin the salsa, all he'd have to do is use water - and maybe add lemon juice to taste.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Some Facebook cringe:

Spoiler

 

[Aristophanes]

Watch out, feeemales of Tinder.
View attachment 412451
Edit: good Lord, he's impatient
View attachment 412461

Lucas, the reason why Tinder isn't "working" for you is frankly that your profile is not only boring, but also extremely off-putting. It's literally the ramblings of a madman, scrawled below some unnerving photos of your creepy face and what I guess is your awful cooking. It's just a constant barrage of Telomerase, a bullshit flavoured wordsalad. There is neither anything that shows you have any interests or hobbies at all, nor something unique that you can offer to someone - let alone that you have a personality. Given that you've already been banned once, and your reputation as a sexual predator in the local area, I'm surprised that you've decided to sign up for Tinder at all. Your cooking can be described as an industrial accident at best.

Spoiler: Slight Powerlevel

As someone who used to spend a lot of time on Tinder, I can say that I've seen my fair share of creeps, edgelords, and outright scary people. I can honestly say that Lucas fits into all three of these, of which most sane people wouldn't hesitate to swipe left. I also found my current partner through Tinder, and I was able to bond with them as we had a lot of the same interests - of which I had put clearly on my profile. I also used pictures of me that didn't look creepy.

Some Facebook cringe:

Spoiler

I don't know if matching on Tinder counts as weening, but either way this young lady has done God's work by giving us a look at Lucas' pickup "techniques" in action. As long as she doesn't get too involved (to the point where it endangers her safety, or makes Lucas worse) she should be fine - I'd recommend for both Lucas, and especially her sake that she unmatches and breaks off contact with him as soon as possible.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

I don't know if matching on Tinder counts as weening, but either way this young lady has done God's work by giving us a look at Lucas' pickup "techniques" in action. As long as she doesn't get too involved (to the point where it endangers her safety, or makes Lucas worse) she should be fine - I'd recommend for both Lucas, and especially her sake that she unmatches and breaks off contact with him as soon as possible.

She got called out very quickly by someone who was both a member of that FB group and friends with Lucas. People are now sending him screenshots of them messaging her with insults, threats, etc.

Edit: Lucas is pretty upset by the latest dating fail

 

[lemongrab]

Oh god, someone taught him "wee n" and it's only going to get worse. Hopefully dear leader doesn't read this thread, because I have a suspicion that Wern's going to use it a lot, and wrongly.

 

[Rogowski]

This is Emily Provencio, the girl who was dumb enough to ween Lucas with her IRL Facebook account.

https://facebook.com/emily.provencio
https://twitter.com/emily_provencio
http://inspirationalsouls.com/no-wo...ncio-the-solution-for-ignorance-is-education/
http://www.voteemilyprovencio.com

You'd think that as the newly elected vice chairwoman of the 4th Legislative District Democratic Party she would have better shit to do than weening mentally ill people but no. Either way this can't be good for her public image

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Manic:

He's still going...

 

[Aristophanes]

This is the Emily Provencio, the girl who was dumb enough to ween Lucas with her IRL Facebook account. View attachment 412694
https://facebook.com/emily.provencio
https://twitter.com/emily_provencio
http://inspirationalsouls.com/no-wo...ncio-the-solution-for-ignorance-is-education/View attachment 412700 You'd think that as the newly elected vice chairwoman of the 4th Legislative District Democratic Party she would have better shit to do than weening mentally ill people but no. Either way this can't be good for her public image

Manic:

He's still going...

Lucas' brief stint on Tinder went from 0-100 real quick, and in this situation is both people involved [Lucas and the ween] that are being exceptional.


Seeing as Emily is a well-respected politician in Spokane with a budding career, I'm surprised that she wasn't smart about the situation and used her real Facebook/Tinder account to mess with Lucas.

 

[Rogowski]

Oh you were raped or molested by an older man and now you have trauma from it? Don't care, you're still a bigot.

 

[AmpleApricots]

Could have fooled me about the being 17, she looks middle-aged. Fucked up what fat does to you.

Some day the Wern will snap again I think. I don't think it'll be particularly dangerous since you know, he's an idiot, but it'll be funny. Weening him isn't.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

He's now made a Facebook page called "Werner Taskforce" as some kind of troll hunting group

 

[RWS Watcher]

This is the Emily Provencio, the girl who was dumb enough to ween Lucas with her IRL Facebook account. View attachment 412694
https://facebook.com/emily.provencio
https://twitter.com/emily_provencio
http://inspirationalsouls.com/no-wo...ncio-the-solution-for-ignorance-is-education/View attachment 412700 You'd think that as the newly elected vice chairwoman of the 4th Legislative District Democratic Party she would have better shit to do than weening mentally ill people but no. Either way this can't be good for her public image

That is just plain dumb. I mean sure there's little chance of her ever meeting Lucas face-to-face, but she wouldn't want her real name attached to Lucas' insanity. I mean, who the hell would want to be known as the girl who weened Lucas 10 to 20 years from now?

 

[TS 298]

This is the Emily Provencio, the girl who was dumb enough to ween Lucas with her IRL Facebook account. View attachment 412694
https://facebook.com/emily.provencio
https://twitter.com/emily_provencio
http://inspirationalsouls.com/no-wo...ncio-the-solution-for-ignorance-is-education/View attachment 412700 You'd think that as the newly elected vice chairwoman of the 4th Legislative District Democratic Party she would have better shit to do than weening mentally ill people but no. Either way this can't be good for her public image

You gotta be shitting me.

 

[autism420]

This is the Emily Provencio, the girl who was dumb enough to ween Lucas with her IRL Facebook account. View attachment 412694
https://facebook.com/emily.provencio
https://twitter.com/emily_provencio
http://inspirationalsouls.com/no-wo...ncio-the-solution-for-ignorance-is-education/View attachment 412700 You'd think that as the newly elected vice chairwoman of the 4th Legislative District Democratic Party she would have better shit to do than weening mentally ill people but no. Either way this can't be good for her public image

Boy, I really hope no one contacts Young Democrats of Washington to let them know that someone who represents them is harassing a mentally ill person on the internet.

 

[Aristophanes]

He's now made a Facebook page called "Werner Taskforce" as some kind of troll hunting group

Another day, another Facebook page. Instead of hunting trolls, that page will be run by them. It'll most likely be Lucas or weens screencapping this thread, SOFALAW or other pages that exist to observe him.

 

[DeletedSoul]

Another day, another Facebook page. Instead of hunting trolls, that page will be run by them. It'll most likely be Lucas or weens screencapping this thread, SOFALAW or other pages that exist to observe him.

Yep. It's already happening. Lucas demanded that Emily get doxxed,
btw .

We have a mole in SOFALAW. I'm currently trying to think of ways to smoke them out.

 

[Aristophanes]

He's now made a Facebook page called "Werner Taskforce" as some kind of troll hunting group

Is there a link to the page so that we could at least archive it?

 

[Rogowski]

Is there a link to the page so that we could at least archive it?

It's a Facebook group and I think he made it secret because I couldn't find it.

 

[Disgruntled Pupper]

Does he really think "Wernlings" is a cute nickname for his imaginary future brood, and not something that sounds gross and disturbing?

Oh right, of course he does, he also thinks thinning Tostitos dip with Sprite is a good idea. There's nothing Lucas can't fuck up.

 

[Don't Call Anybody]

Does he really think "Wernlings" is a cute nickname for his imaginary future brood, and not something that sounds gross and disturbing?

Oh right, of course he does, he also thinks thinning Tostitos dip with Sprite is a good idea. There's nothing Lucas can't fuck up.

Naturally, fit women make good potential mothers to Wernlings. The telomerase alone apparently can't make up for the diabetes or pure, unbridled crazy.