random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Anonitolia]

I could have gone my whole life without knowing that.

 

[Gentlebastard]

living the life with his exotic imported wife and five entire sinks

Good lord, that's a comb over. I've never seen one like that before. What a great, yet terrible, achievement!

"Bottoms" is a bit basic don't you think? "Anal Cavity Deep Diving (Or How I Gave Up and Learned To Love Internal Hemorrhoids)" is much more artsy and descriptive.

It'll be fun to accuse people of being part of the UN MemeTeam instead of being feds.

Eating pygmies totally bestows magic powers though, you should try it before you criticize it

I'm just taking this as some sort of ruse to create the world's largest stash of child porn. Their Blue Helmets can't help but rape women and children wherever they go; well, what do you think the Cyber Blue Helmets are gonna do? Actually enforce law and order?

Dementia is associated with some very disinhibited behaviour as well. It’s not uncommon for dementia patients to be extremely inappropriate sexually.
An old folks home full of troons sounds like a nightmare, imagine needing to do personal care on an amhole

Can't we just do what the eskimos do with their elders? Put them on ice floes then set them adrift.

Between overdoses, AIDS and other STDs, suicides and domestic violence this is a group that really doesn't need to worry about old age.

Nobody wants them around now. Why would anyone want them around when they're crazy and old as fuck?

The U.N. is recreating the Bully Hunters

Imagine a geriatric mtf troon with alzhiemers waking up each morning and screaming, "Where the fuck is my dick?!!!!"

will the digital blue helmet janny be raping children too or simply grooming them in some chatroom?

 

[Aunt Carol]

Godspeed you obstinately milquetoast horsefucker

 

[Vingle]

>lool I was just joking about raping an 11 year old

 

[Blackhole]

translation: "i hope it doesnt happen because guns scare me and make me shid and fard all up in my osh kosh b'goshes"

So wait you're telling me that there's a timeline where an incarcerated ex-president gets elected and pardons himself to the chagrin of half the entire country?
And I'm expected not to participate in such tomfoolery?!

We're never going to return to normalcy are we, kiwis? We are stuck in Circus Mode forever, aren't we?

If the condom don't fit you must acquit

Judge: So he got his dick wet. Big fucking deal!

It is crazy to think that the death of Jim Metokur, while sad, will flood the global market with cheap Jimtatos, driving down the price of German pool fries, and effectively ending rape in the country.

Ah yes, snuggling and eating chocolate while menstruating. Very manly.

Well, you can't, because you don't have a fucking cock, front hole haver.

"stupid ass women inventing stupid ass words"

WORLD wars, dood!

 

[Aunt Carol]

OK, let's start. Masturbation is not a 'hobby'.

I am a subscriber to wank Weekly and Masturbation Monthly, and a longterm member of the Sacred Circle of the Jerk. I am a Spanked Monkey, 23rd degree, and will run for one of its most prestigious offices, the Boxed Jesuit. In our main Facebook group for female members, The Rosy Daughters, we discuss the latest advances in techniques, technology and terminology. Of course, we have to deal with accusations of terfdom and attempts to derail from our trans members, but we’ve built a special community. Not a hobby? Well no - it’s more a way of life.

 

[MrJokerRager]

The existence of .webp is a crime against humanity.

 

[Autistic Joe]

If you've ever donated blood, that blood could be inside someone's boner right now.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

It's wrong to think they didn't care. They cared deeply, especially about their self-inserts. They just had no skills and no desire to develop them, because that would be The Patriarchy.

"I identify as dead"

Man, I come back to this thread months later expecting the sperg to have punched himself out by now, but he's somehow more retarded? Points for persistence, I guess.

 

[PhoBingas]

There is No God But Christine and Sonichu is Her Messenger.
Allah may be Great, but Christine is Greater.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@Twinkletard

These french fries are getting expensive
I"m gonna rape

 

[Maricón de Mierda]

The moon has officially been declared a “Designated Shitting Moon.”

The worst fucking thing is having to wait for Americans to wake up to get my content.

MYTH: The house always wins.
FACT: He kicked the shit out of that door. Checkmate, house.

no pedophilia, no politics, just an old-school voltalite autism.

The court finds the defendant fat on all accounts

Here is the video of him jerking his gherkin in his parents' bed

Why couldn't he jerk off on his own bed?

From the new Bossmanjack thread.

 

[Brain Power]

I didn't open this thread to see Hitler porn, holy shit tumblrites are insane

 

[Lithuophile]

what if you were ur avatar IRL?

Probably throw a Spirit Bomb at Israel.

 

[Bloitzhole]

This case involves the collection of an anonymous, foreign judgement based on actions of individuals operating a worldwide troll ecosystem.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

Let me consult my crystal fucking ball

 

[Anne Hyroe]

technically we are an unintelligence gathering op

 

[Gentlebastard]

This is unholy and disgusting on levels that I can't even comprehend, let alone shitpost about.

I think Physiognomy is making a comeback.

This nigger is why ball and chain and forced labour in rock quarries was invented.

Must......resist.....urge......to......make.....dark....pedo.......jokes.

Why contain it? Let it spill over to the schools and churches, let the jokes pile up in the tweets. In the end, they'll beg us to save them from laughing.

Trevor, being a nigger, immediately accused Jon of saying all black people are illiterate niggers, which isn't true. Only an overwhelming majority of niggers can't read.

Most women would fuck one of the people on "My 600 lb life" if they could get a story out of it (and find the dick).

John Stewart was the OG Internet Commentary Community. And that lone, deserves death.

"Newly resurfaced footage shows the disturbing DUI arrest of an alleged child rapist who had six young boys and girls in his car along with empty bottles of tequila and Fireball whiskey."

So he's not only a chomo, he has shit taste in whiskey.

I'm amazed troons haven't latched on to hair metal. What with the pretty boys in makeup, big hair and neon spandex. And all the sexually charged lyrics. It's funny though. The guys from Poison passed better than the average troon and they weren't even trying to be women.

There are no "chicks with dicks".

Only "men with tits".

Knowing is half the battle.

Men have dicks, women have pussies, simple as.

Pat included the "voodoo" dolls in his motion.

Starving children in Africa could have eaten that Ferrari.

there's a whole subgenre of thinkpieces on A&N in which a successful professional woman (it's always a woman) aged 30 to 45, usually with a husband and kids, finally gets diagnosed with autism and cooms a grand revelatory orgasm

larp as a retard all you want, most of us are larpers here, but don't get certified, that has IRL consequences

And that hobo's name? Albert Einstein.

Danny Devito and Kevin Hart are shorty's but you wouldn't think pooner in a million years.

Taking notes for my next mpreg fic.

Men wearing women's clothes has always been inherently funny (see also: the past 5000+ pages of this thread). I long for the days we're allowed to have comedy again, Kiwi frens

Pooners will write paragraphs kindly correcting you, while the transwoman would tell you to fuck off and die.

But we can't tell.

 

[Rotollo 2]

You're Sappho arent you, Show me your feet.

 

[Brain Power]

was there a tranny hitler headcanon?

View attachment 5296214

"I wanted to portray Hitler the way he was always meant to be portrayed; as a proud woman of color."

DARKNESS
IMPRISONING ME
SO I CAN BE
ABSOLUTE POONER
I CANNOT COPE
I CANNOT SNEED
TRAPPED IN MYSELF
AT LEAST I HAVE NO REGRETS