random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CallmeCicada]

in my eyes, a funny pedophile that i enjoy listening too and laugh at is of greater value

 

[Hamstirer]

You know, in a way, dropping a nuke is kinda like doing the ultimate shit in the street.

 

[Seafarer]

I know not when the war between Paki's and 'Jeets will be fought, but it will be fought with poo and scam calls - Albert Einstein, probably

 

[Tablet County]

>be jeet
>buy Russian gear
>it sucks total ass
>die

By virtue of it happening, it is a new normal. Thus, nothing has happened.

 

[DickMain]

Imagine getting doxed on the Farms because you sperged about your battlestation in a designated shitting thread and didn't hide your pony sextoys plushies.

 

[often puzzled]

Today is not the day I interject into an argument about anorexic genitalia.

I didn’t expect to find necrobestiality in here, but here we are. Have… fun…?

 

[Dr. Butt]

Cool, more media driven demon worship. Man it never gets old, does it guys!

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Why bad things happen to good niggers?

 

[Tablet County]

holy shit twitter is completely and utterly fucking useless with all the third world shitters posting about this. theres no news or discussion just SAAR SAAR and SNACKBAR ALOHA SNACKBAR

 

[Tablet County]

I came into this thread blind and walked face first into the Great Wall of Text

This nigga just used no-joke but meant it as a joke.

India literally just released some gay amv of indias being killed in their poo language stream to justify whatever they did
It was really badly edited

tbh it's really unfair that countries fight wars according to their own priorities, which don't include destroying themselves and everything else two seconds after starting. They aren't catering to our demand for total instant gratification and that jes ain' right I tell yew hwat

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

I think of you more as autistic and slightly gay, but instead of trains and sonic you’re interested in monkey penises.

Retarded autists should be given a chance to sperg out before getting doxed.

The line between observer and neghole pozzer gets thinner and thinner the more invested you become, and eventually you look back to realize you crossed it several miles ago.

Alex is playing 7-D Backgammon, and we're all over here just eating Checkers.

I guess Alex has Toji crossed off his kill list.

How can one thread about a dime a dozen mental trainwreck be such a lightning rod for retarded forum drama?

You know how they say misery loves company? Same goes for retardation.

Are you saying misery loves retardation or that retardation loves company?

Either way, I'm not retarded. Your retarded!

 

[supremeautismo]

The rope must be speaking to him like it's the Green Goblin mask.

 

[Tablet County]

(The fuck happened to the thumbnail? Used to just be a simple one but this actually makes me want to not link it anymore)

"YOU TOOK MY JEW POWERS"

All he wants to do is wear nice shirts and talk about Happenings.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

About this time the playground aide comes over and goes "Oh my, young man, where are your underwear?!" to which he replied "I crapped 'em all, WOMAN!"

I don't want a lawyer who is a dragon, I want a lawyer who is like a dragon

(emphasis added)

 

[Pedophobe]

If this is the kind of reasoning an IQ of 145 gets you, I'd rather be retarded.

He has built a personal hell for himself and he should stay there.

He also says Luna's posts were captured by "Kiwi Farms agents".

 

[Point 707]

It autocorrected from nigger. I have fixed this.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I propose we replace the world cup with a gladiatorial event starring furries versus actual lions. Naturally, for reasons of animal welfare, the furries will be declawed, defanged and covered in the lion's choice of dipping sauces before the match. All proceeds to animal rescues.

Phones across the country have absolutely batshit insane texts from ricky, and we'll never know their contents.

Makes sense, since not being racist just adds to the villainy.

it would be more productive to impregnate a jar of pig knuckles on america's got talent

Don't forget the projectile vomit that went all over the wall.

To be scientific about it, the chode has been consumed by the fupa.

Now I want a remake of Terminator where the humans yell nigger and faggot at the machines to defeat them.

This raises a difficult legal question: how do you exactly tell if a French guy is gay?

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

I am totally 100% serious and this is not a shit post.

 

[CEO of Gay]

A quote from RFK, from a post in USPG2 discussing an interview with RFK

We had an emu, but a lion ate it.

 

[blackface enthusiast]

Wtf are four housekeepers doing in one house for 60 hours a week anyway?

Besides getting raped, I mean.