random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[UnsufficentBoobage]

I have a serious question for you fatty, fat, rotund, obese, walking avatars of adipose horror, whale, sentient planetoid, fat fucks who push this shit

I have done nothing but teleport gravel for 3 days

Do one with Zzzzchczch....zcHzch.. the polish guy with the fucked up paintings

Shit's gay so you have to look up for homosexual solutions from time to time

General Butt Naked seems to be mostly rehabilitated. He's a preacher these days.

To your great dismay, you're faced with the visage of your arch enemy, CHEDDAR

I look for asian mail order brides

Penis Wrath is why people beat their penises

I swear to God it's the gay version of the Early Life section

Fucking a author that you respect sounds awful like it risks damaging your ability to enjoy their writing later, like accelerating the idea of familiarity breeds contempt.

Have you heard much about the New School? Having this guy as an instructor is the least of their problems. It's like they emptied a mental hospital into an anarchist squad, taught them critical theory and started charging people hundreds of thousands of dollars to study there.

that the last person in there didn't commit biological atrocities on the stall

*I'll* whisper "my rate is two hundred bucks for 3 hours, cash only, up front."

It's easy to find a robot to have sex with if your standards are realistic

My heart is mostly gorilla glue, with shards of glass sticking out of it.

Women, for some reason, have wrists like limp noodles attached to dying children.

ou better check that bitches asshole on the daily to make sure she doesnt have a biological weapon created by the IDF to murder you for your gem and gold stashes

I hate constant reminders to drink water and stay hydrated. Nigga I am hydrated already shut the fuck up

I can't let the cat in my room overnight, she'd try to pluck my eyebrows. She likely thinks those sad sparse hairs (from cat's view) aren't worth keeping and tries to spare me from embarassing myself

They all look like some sort of autism awareness cakes, except the ones to the right, they look a little bit too Italian.

I was at a Worldcon taking an elevator when two black chicks came in and one to the other said, “I met Samuel Delaney and at first he was all like I’m Samuel Delaney but then after a while he was really cool.”

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

What does that have to do with anything. All my shit is straight porn free of niggers and trannies.

Now I am not going to pretend I didn't download videos of light skinned latina bitches though. They could cross the border any time.

A terabyte of AV1 encoded pornography would be terrifying.

Was it safe to release that snake? Now that he has a taste for penis he may attack again

Apparently this is a hot take here, but I'm not eating canned goods that someone has pissed all over.

 

[supremeautismo]

“Your honor, my client may have killed those two babies with his bare hands… but did you know that Jamal is the funniest nigga in the hood?”

 

[invisibult plus+]

PUSSY FACING THE WORLD!

 

[Rembrandt]

My condolences for those of you still holding out hope.

He has his rare moments of humility. Like how freaked out he looked when he accidentally shat in the swimming pool.

 

[stupid frog]

Who would've guessed women were fags for masculine cock.

 

[vomitusdeux]

A smaller one than usual because I don't feel like being online as much.

100 grand minimum to touch his uncunt.

And that's why Olive Garden is considered a five-star fine dining establishment.

Only the finest pork slop products and Olive Garden will touch this man's lips.

 

[spacko]

going say ech party of matter can say no damg sort deal and,they ech playing there role in all. this sort deal all reday events are setup for pubic cumusion og matter

, little bit of diffent matter is check into ford what happin reson with they looking shut down all of there plant if supply need don,t keep up that lead on real and bigger probem be in fount of people soon eaf for them.

 

[Gentlebastard]

This cow is always lowering the bar in his limbo contest with himself

Less than a fucking hour after I come back from a month long fucking hiatus and pig man is already getting into new shenanigans?!

Fuck my ass I aint ever gonna catch up with what I missed now

I really don't want to be racist, but as time goes on I don't know if I can hold up any longer.

he's an overfilled garbage bag of competing sins

When you're such a miserable cunt that even the suicide hotlines drop you, maybe the problem is you?

In Obama's commencement speech to my graduating class, he advised, "never download or save porn to your devices." I think those were wise words to live by.

His headspace is a strange and unfortunate mash-up of gay porn phrasing and Men's Adventure magazine stories from the 30's-50's.

 

[Irredemable Retardation]

what is the "I'm a lover and builder too, of rape" one's origins?

 

[Harm]

Only in this thread could 'he was hyping up bestiality, not pedophilia' be considered the best case scenario.

 

[DumbDude43]

[ANTI-NULL CLITTY LEAKAGE THUMBNAIL EMBED]

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

Yes, but I am also right

 

[Colon capital V]

"Republicans separating families with FNAF money"

 

[WonderWino]

But if I don't interface with the Machine Elves via DMT, how else will I un-calcify my pineal gland?

 

[Hey Bitches it's me]

View attachment 7541690

Iconic.

 

[Harm]

prehistoric cum tributes...
That's enough Internet for today.

 

[invisibult plus+]

... as such the US will be able to do whatever the fuck it wants as long as it has a leader with 1/10th of an ass.

 

[Asian tech support]

Btw my conditions for the "calling me a liar to my fucking face" cheese ban is that it will be permanent unless you do the Cheese Run. You must go to your local store with a piece of paper that has your username on it. You will, at the cheese carousel, take a picture of your username on a piece of paper next to anything that says Limburger or Liederkranz. Send this to <admin@kiwifarms.net>. There must be several of them so you can't buy a single piece online and just throw it in the carousel, it needs to look like a real display. So if you are going to cheese the cheese test you're at least going to have to buy a bunch. I'll also accept a wheel behind glass; it basically just needs to look like you're actually at a store that sells it.

 

[indomitable snowman]

After reading this I went and had sex, patriotically

I am going to be a Father now, just confirmed.
Have strong white families, patriotically!

Whatever happens, my love for israel and jews stays undying in this hard time.