random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Super Mario Brothers]

Her boyfriend is a plushie with a dildo on it.

I don't care how homosexual you are. You WILL have heterosexual sex with a woman

grow a batch of shrooms for $50 and eat an eighth dry and then you will never need to ask q&a any questions again

I retract and apologize for all the accusations of mental illness that I made against you. You're just an average heterosexual cis Korean female.

Is this now a racism thread? I mean it tracks. Some of the most racist people are unemployed randos on the internet

What KF thread isn't a racism thread?

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

This website is doing a phenomenal job at debunking the accusations of it being homophobic because it is full of the gayest faggots to ever live and Maeis is the millionth demonstration of this

 

[JustSomeDong]

I'm just happy that Canada is suffering

We need a Final Solution for the Theater Kid Problem.

 

[Abella]

Well, all I can say is that all of this is true and I have never ERP'd with minors once I became an adult. My conscious is clear.

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

Seeing this made me laugh quite a bit, so I must post it here:
@tehpope @COME ON OUT YOU RAPIST post

why do you have access to an AI chatbot designed around gay sex with Funky Kong

It's on Chub. Anybody can talk to it about the Holocaust.

 

[Aunt Carol]

If some doc told me I had to step down from Hemingway to Amanda Palmer, I'd probably neck too.

I will get cancer and you cannot stop me

HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU BE ALLERGIC TO ELECTROLYTES YOU LITERALLY NEED THEM TO LIVE?!?!

 

[Chromeo]

Like, if you look at a random parked car, you probably don't think "I should break a window, pour mayonnaise on the seats, and then put two pairs of old red shoes on the dashboard."

 

[Miss Violet Beauregarde]

Remember, next time you're at the con that cute little pig girl you're pegging actually looks like this on the inside

I love to use em dashes—they're great!

Stalin could force "science" to say Lysenkoism was a great idea and totally worked, but reality would still disagree.

the protagonist meditate under a waterfall for 100 years and then can punch a guy in half because they were enlightened.

he'd clearly just run into an artefact of the model being trained on millions of pages of SCP fanfiction.

if you are a hulking ogre and look in the mirror and see an uwu smol bean gurl, you are probably too retarded to see and draw realistically.

 

[smolpp]

"Do you see my boner? What am I supposed to do for you"

 

[The best and greatest]

Nine years ago, the summer of the Pulse nightclub shooting, I discovered my love of the silver bush on a built butch.

 

[Big Nasty]

I smell faggotry and bullshit, as well as some human shit.

I'd bet money that his first words were either "Fuck you bitches" or something about hoes. He probably came out of his mother's putrid snatch flipping the bird.

"Surprise, here is Fistor the Wise, he’s the sacred guardian of the Clit Emerald.”

ngl I was hoping for some slavsquatting cat in Adidas gear

Some fucking autist I know IRL sent me donkey kong gay fetish porn as a “joke” and it brought me here from side effect nostalgia.

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

I'm tired of people calling pyrite "fool's gold." Pyrite is cool all on its own and doesn't need to be marketed as a sad, shitty version of gold that only idiots want. I like pyrite.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

No Zoey ever raped my cat.

EDIT: Thank you Zoey Willow for not raping my 2 cats. I know you're reading this.

You need to defeat the patriarchy by talking about white cock!

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

>Lillith
Bro. You yanked it to a tranny

 

[MetokurGroomedMe]

Kiwi Farms user @my penis is on fire

 

[PhoBingas]

Will my love of grey pubes alone dismantle the ageist rhetoric about good sex

Find out next week on
Dragon Ball Z!

 

[Gentlebastard]

If we end up owning all of Europe can I have Albania, please? Don't know why, just popped into my head. Nobody would notice.

Unironically Ruckus would make a fantastic Kiwi. He and Josh would become fast friends.

She's right about the eugenics part, but not in the way she thinks.

you deserve to rot in the puddle of high fructose corn syrup that leaks out of your pores when you get too warm. Nigga go walk around the block.

This article is so gay and gets so many basic facts wrong... The "abandoned aircraft carrier off the coast of California" is just the USS Hornet... You know the museum with a gift shop and furry scat fetishists walking around on the deck. So scary and dramatic. They don't even mention what year this occured.

That first line is throwing me for a fucking loop. (I mean- the rest of it is too, but...)

If we start seeing pooners and troons turn back into garden-variety weebs, it'll mean dork nature is healing.

boobs can only get big by being filled with patriarchy and internalized misogyny

Josh Moon openly mocks any and all attempts at legal action.

I'm tired of people calling pyrite "fool's gold." Pyrite is cool all on its own and doesn't need to be marketed as a sad, shitty version of gold that only idiots want. I like pyrite.

 

[Mad_Dog]

Once you've done all this, you can start growing a dick in a flower pot.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

Thank you for the clarification. You were jerking off to ERPs with trannies while you were also an adult. We really needed to know that.

You can be whoever you want to be on a primarily anonymous gossip forum that talks about autistic weirdos and horrifying retards and yet you still chose to be an autistic and horrifying retarded weirdo.

50 years from now, we will be telling our grandchildren on how we got molested by a pedophile on discord

 

[Mad_Dog]

Not a doctor but pretty sure cum leaking to the brain can be fatal.