random_text.txt

[Open Window Maniac]

That's a hell of a lot better than being obsessed with Bubsy 3D.

 

[tranny2000]

White person who got 20% Brazilian on Ancestry dot com spotted.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Bicycles literally changed the world for the better. Until the invention of the bicycle, the average two people getting married in the UK lived less than 1 mile apart. After the bicycle was popularized, that number rose to 30 miles. Imagine all the kissing cousins it must have prevented over the years.

Besides, I thought the "big goal" is to whip it out at a men's room and intimidate the other dudes with it's amazing length and incredible girth, while they unleash a perfect urine arc into the urinal twenty feet away.

Y'know, like all REAL MEN do every time they take a leak, right?

Why would I spend 100 bucks on a dog toy? That guy literally rolls around in shit and chews on driftwood and is thrilled.

Helo qute let me park 1 feet pinus in ur vegeta

 

[Return of the Freaker]

( ) -ballsack mons pubis
. - amhole canal way below

 

[Hitman One]

Why do you have random pics of jap kids saved?

 

[Loosey Goosey]

Watching radfems and Kiwifarmers discuss sex and relationships is like seeing a hood nigga and an aboriginal discuss quantum mechanics.

 

[Solid Snek]

I can relate. My awareness of boobs and their intrinsic sexual value was just earlier. The first pair of boobs to ever make my pp hard were a pair I saw when I was 3. My parents had taken me to a dinner party with them and while there I kept staring at this woman with gigantic breasts.

I was like...."I LIKE HER, MOM!!! SHE'S BIG!!!"...while staring right at her tits.

The lady was like...."What a cute kid!"...and had no fucking clue I was staring at her tits and sporting a woody.

My mom knew and glared at my dad and was like..."Yep. Like father, like son."...because apparently every male on my Dad's side of the family was like that around huge tits.

Boobs are awesome. If a woman has no tits, she has no value in my mind. Of course, size isn't everything. They have to be nice tits. Not nasty retard tits.

You could cut it down to

The first pair of boobs to ever make my pp hard were a pair I saw when I was 3. My parents had taken me to a dinner party with them and while there I kept staring at this woman with gigantic breasts.

or

Boobs are awesome. If a woman has no tits, she has no value in my mind. Of course, size isn't everything. They have to be nice tits. Not nasty retard tits.

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

One day I'll eat a whole can of pringles.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Not washing seems either a requirement for or a consequence of Tumblr. Then her head grew larger and her face itself grew smaller.

I'm pretty sure that God is disappointed in him.

Stealing some kid's liver is the ultimate smol girl flex.

Something tells me her gastrointestinal adventures are just beginning.

 

[Kromer Merchant]

Don't get mad at me because you niggers somehow made this into muh raycism and muh country, I don't care. I just wanted to know how null intended to get his dick wet and spread his seed to keep up with ralph.

 

[Bobby Worst]

As if I'm going to take fitness and diet advice from a fat chick.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

No space for nuance in this world, its either totenkopf or toddler brothels, them's your choices.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

there are no trans rights
only trans wrongs

They also have tastefully proportioned penises, unlike the monstrously endowed African black.

It sanctions attacking your competitors and turns HS track into gladiatorial combat.

Funny how they don't mention that Dopey is the first loveable autist in an animated film. You'd think they would applaud that.

you can tell, trust me you can tell if its a troon.

Most of my information comes from forum posts and Dunkey videos which means it's flawless and peer reviewed.

 

[On a Journey]

I PAY YOUR RENT AND YOU FUCK A GRAY PUSSY?!?!?!?!

-Chantal, in "Crunk"

 

[Return of the Freaker]

Null needs to go on a love quest.

You mean there aren't people looking to have unspeakable physical and psychological damage inflicted onto them at the hands of some woman with the body proportions of Dr. Ivo Robotnik?

Null is a catch. I’m not sure what your issue is with finding a girl, if you are being sincere with this post. Maybe just chill a little. If you look like Greer maybe buy a good rope.

This is probably the worst thread on Kiwifarms. That being said, please don't get married, Null.

I heard him say the following: "I believe trans-women should be nurtured and cherished - like plants." I absolutely howled with laughter. Mr. Nullmoon is putting on an act, and his minions don't realize it.

Unfortunately, Null stops being attractive when he starts sperging about the white race.

Null spitting straight truth and it seems like no one gets it. Even if he had a girlfriend, why would he want you psychos to know about it?

He already has a partner because he's married to Kiwi Farms.

This thread is gay and I think null should try ladyboy once before he commit to someone.

Can't even let a man hate niggers in peace on his own website. Shame on you.

damn refuted, guess this is a website dedicated to racism after all. please, @ me to discuss race politics more.

 

[Blackhole]

"Mods, ban anyone saying I don't wash my hands. Welcome to unwashed hands ban world."

I feel super fucking bad about this, sorry Israel, you know everyone loves you

You have a mysterious, wealthy Israeli benefactor now.

kiwifarms: officially sponsored and funded by israel as of 2022/04/02

Sorry, but the mental image of a wheelchair-bound wife standing up and running like Jesse Owens as far as possible from her troon husband is fucking hilarious

 

[Big Nasty]

The request to send footage of a man being pepper sprayed in the anus was somewhat strange,

 

[Solid Snek]

Sadly for Lou, I identify as someone who can see right through his stupid bullshit.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I can never understand the concept of people attaching nsfw shit to their profile, considering like 90% of the "nudes" here are festering amholes, fat people, and small dicks.

Dear user, it has come to our attention you have violated Emmett Till laws on our platform. A George Floyd anti-violence van is being dispatched to your location, please cooperate in your upcoming anti-racism re-education. Successful completion of the 9 week intensive program makes you eligible for a large beverage of your choice at affiliated retailers!

 

[Pee Cola]

This is "shits-in-the-urinal" retarded. I love it.